The Complete Plays of Gilbert and Sullivan Part 24

LUD. (aside to JULIA). No, no--it isn't Greek. Be a violet, I beg.

BAR. And now tell me all about this distressing circ.u.mstance. How did the Grand Duke die?

LUD. He perished n.o.bly--in a Statutory Duel.

BAR. In a Statutory Duel? But that's only a civil death!--and the Act expires to-night, and then he will come to life again!

LUD. Well, no. Anxious to inaugurate my reign by conferring some inestimable boon on my people, I signalized this occasion by reviving the law for another hundred years.

BAR. For another hundred years? Then set the merry joybells ringing! Let festive epithalamia resound through these ancient halls! Cut the satisfying sandwich--broach the exhilarating Marsala--and let us rejoice to-day, if we never rejoice again!

LUD. But I don't think I quite understand. We have already rejoiced a good deal.

BAR. Happy man, you little reck of the extent of the good things you are in for. When you killed Rudolph you adopted all his overwhelming responsibilities. Know then that I, Caroline von Krakenfeldt, am the most overwhelming of them all!

LUD. But stop, stop--I've just been married to somebody else!

JULIA. Yes, ma'am, to somebody else, ma'am! Do you understand, ma'am? To somebody else!

BAR. Do keep this young woman quiet; she fidgets me!

JULIA. Fidgets you!

LUD. (aside to JULIA). Be a violet--a crushed, despairing violet.

JULIA. Do you suppose I intend to give up a magnificent part without a struggle?

LUD. My good girl, she has the law on her side. Let us both bear this calamity with resignation. If you must struggle, go away and struggle in the seclusion of your chamber.

SONG--BARONESS and CHORUS.

Now away to the wedding we go, So summon the charioteers-- No kind of reluctance they show To embark on their married careers.

Though Julia's emotion may flow For the rest of her maidenly years, ALL. To the wedding we eagerly go, So summon the charioteers!

Now away, etc.

(All dance off to wedding except JULIA.)

RECIT.--JULIA.

So ends my dream--so fades my vision fair!

Of hope no gleam--distraction and despair!

My cherished dream, the Ducal throne to share That aim supreme has vanished into air!

SONG--JULIA.

Broken every promise plighted-- All is darksome--all is dreary.

Every new-born hope is blighted!

Sad and sorry--weak and weary Death the Friend or Death the Foe, Shall I call upon thee? No!

I will go on living, though Sad and sorry--weak and weary!

No, no! Let the bygone go by!

No good ever came of repining: If to-day there are clouds o'er the sky, To-morrow the sun may be shining!

To-morrow, be kind, To-morrow, to me!

With loyalty blind I curtsey to thee!

To-day is a day of illusion and sorrow, So viva To-morrow, To-morrow, To-morrow!

G.o.d save you, To-morrow!

Your servant, To-morrow!

G.o.d save you, To-morrow, To-morrow, To-morrow!

[Exit JULIA.

Enter ERNEST.

ERN. It's of no use--I can't wait any longer. At any risk I must gratify my urgent desire to know what is going on.

(Looking off.) Why, what's that? Surely I see a wedding procession winding down the hill, dressed in my Troilus and Cressida costumes! That's Ludwig's doing! I see how it is--he found the time hang heavy on his hands, and is amusing himself by getting married to Lisa. No--it can't be to Lisa, for here she is!

Enter LISA.

LISA (not seeing him). I really cannot stand seeing my Ludwig married twice in one day to somebody else!

ERN. Lisa!

(LISA sees him, and stands as if transfixed with horror.).

ERN. Come here--don't be a little fool--I want you.

(LISA suddenly turns and bolts off.) ERN. Why, what's the matter with the little donkey? One would think she saw a ghost! But if he's not marrying Lisa, whom is he marrying? (Suddenly.) Julia! (Much overcome.) I see it all! The scoundrel! He had to adopt all my responsibilities, and he's shabbily taken advantage of the situation to marry the girl I'm engaged to! But no, it can't be Julia, for here she is!

Enter JULIA.

JULIA (not seeing him). I've made up my mind. I won't stand it! I'll send in my notice at once!

ERN. Julia! Oh, what a relief!

(JULIA gazes at him as if transfixed.)

ERN. Then you've not married Ludwig? You are still true to me?

(JULIA turns and bolts in grotesque horror. ERNEST follows and stops her.)

ERN. Don't run away! Listen to me. Are you all crazy?

JULIA (in affected terror). What would you with me, spectre? Oh, ain't his eyes sepulchral! And ain't his voice hollow! What are you doing out of your tomb at this time of day--apparition?

ERN. I do wish I could make you girls understand that I'm only technically dead, and that physically I'm as much alive as ever I was in my life!

JULIA. Oh, but it's an awful thing to be haunted by a technical bogy!

ERN. You won't be haunted much longer. The law must be on its last legs, and in a few hours I shall come to life again--resume all my social and civil functions, and claim my darling as my blushing bride!

JULIA. Oh--then you haven't heard?

ERN. My love, I've heard nothing. How could I? There are no daily papers where I come from.

JULIA. Why, Ludwig challenged Rudolph and won, and now he's Grand Duke, and he's revived the law for another century!

ERN. What! But you're not serious--you're only joking!

JULIA. My good sir, I'm a light-hearted girl, but I don't chaff bogies.

ERN. Well, that's the meanest dodge I ever heard of!

JULIA. Shabby trick, I call it.

ERN. But you don't mean to say that you're going to cry off!

JULIA. I really can't afford to wait until your time is up.

You know, I've always set my face against long engagements.

ERN. Then defy the law and marry me now. We will fly to your native country, and I'll play broken-English in London as you play broken-German here!

JULIA. No. These legal technicalities cannot be defied.

Situated as you are, you have no power to make me your wife. At best you could only make me your widow.

ERN. Then be my widow--my little, dainty, winning, winsome widow!

JULIA. Now what would be the good of that? Why, you goose, I should marry again within a month!

DUET--ERNEST and JULIA.

ERN. If the light of love's lingering ember Has faded in gloom, You cannot neglect, O remember, A voice from the tomb!

That stern supernatural diction Should act as a solemn restriction, Although by a mere legal fiction A voice from the tomb!

JULIA (in affected terror).

I own that that utterance chills me-- It withers my bloom!

With awful emotion it thrills me-- That voice from the tomb!