The American Credo - novelonlinefull.com
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--357
That the Thursday matinees given by Chauncey Olcott are attended only by Irish servant girls.
--358
That the reason the British authorities didn't lock up Bernard Shaw during the war was because they were afraid of his mind.
--359
That Professor Garner is able to carry on long and intimate conversations with monkeys in their own language.
--360
That oysters are a great aphrodisiac.
--361
That if one sleeps with one's head on a high pillow one will be round-shouldered.
--362
That coal miners get so dirty that they have to wash so often that they are the cleanest working-men in the world.
--363
That the average French housewife can make such a soup out of the contents of a garbage-can that the eater will think he is at the Ritz.
--364
That such authors as Dr. Frank Crane and Herbert Kaufman do not really believe what they write, but print it simply for the money that is in it.
--365
That the average newspaper cartoonist makes $100,000 a year.
--366
That when a play is given in an insane asylum the inmates always laugh at the tragic moments and cry at the humorous moments.
--367
That if a girl takes the last cake off a plate she will die an old maid.
--368
That men high in public affairs always read detective stories for diversion.
--369
That the wireless news bulletins posted daily on ocean liners are made up on board.
--370
That the Swiss, when they sing, always yodel.
--371
That all German housewives are very frugal.
--372
That if one holds a b.u.t.tercup under a person's chin and a yellow light is reflected upon that person's chin, it is a sign that he likes b.u.t.ter.
--373
That all penny-in-the-slot weighing machines make a fat woman lighter and a thin woman heavier.
--374
That in the period just before a woman's baby is born the woman's face takes on a peculiar spiritual and holy look.
--375
That when a Chinese laundryman hands one a slip for one's laundry, the Chinese letters which he writes on the slip have nothing to do with the laundry but are in reality a derogatory description of the owner.
--376
That an old woman with rheumatism in her leg can infallibly predict when it is going to rain.
