Waste Part 25

HORSHAM. Do they place any time-limit to the effect of a mortal sin? If this affair were twenty years old would you do as you are doing? Can you forecast the opinion you will have of it six months hence?

CANTELUPE. [_Positively._] Yes.

HORSHAM. Can you? Nevertheless I wish you had postponed your decision even till to-morrow.

_Having made his point he looks round almost for approval._

BLACKBOROUGH. What had Percival to say on the subject, Farrant?

FARRANT. I was only to make use of his opinion under certain circ.u.mstances.

BLACKBOROUGH. So it isn't favourable to your remaining with us, Mr. Trebell.

FARRANT. [_Indignantly emerging from the trap._] I never said that.

_Now_ TREBELL _gives the matter another turn, very forcefully._

TREBELL. Horsham ... I don't bow politely and stand aside at this juncture as a gentleman should, because I want to know how the work's to be done if I leave you what I was to do.

BLACKBOROUGH. Are we so incompetent?

TREBELL. I daresay not. I want to know ... that's all.

CANTELUPE. Please understand, Mr. Trebell, that I have in no way altered my good opinion of your proposals.

BLACKBOROUGH. Well, I beg to remind you, Horsham, that from the first I've reserved myself liberty to criticise fundamental points in the scheme.

HORSHAM. [_Pacifically._] Quite so ... quite so.

BLACKBOROUGH. That nonsensical new standard of teachers' salaries for one thing ... you'd never pa.s.s it.

HORSHAM. Quite easily. It's an administrative point, so leave the legislation vague. Then, as the appropriation money falls in, the qualifications rise and the salaries rise. No one will object because no one will appreciate it but administrators past or future ... and they never cavil at money. [_He remains lost in the beauty of this prospect._]

TREBELL. Will you take charge of the bill, Blackborough?

BLACKBOROUGH. Are you serious?

HORSHAM. [_Brought to earth._] Oh no! [_He corrects himself smiling._] I mean, my dear Blackborough, why not stick to the Colonies?

BLACKBOROUGH. You see, Trebell, there's still the possibility that O'Connell may finally spike your gun to-morrow. You realise that, don't you?

TREBELL. Thank you. I quite realise that.

CANTELUPE. Can nothing further be done?

BLACKBOROUGH. Weren't we doing our best?

HORSHAM. Yes ... if we were bending our thoughts to that difficulty now....

TREBELL. [_Hardly._] May I ask you to interfere on my behalf no further?

FARRANT. My dear Trebell!

TREBELL. I a.s.sure you that I am interested in the Disestablishment Bill.

_So they turn readily enough from the more uncomfortable part of their subject._

BLACKBOROUGH. Well ... here's Farrant.

FARRANT. I'm no good. Give me Agriculture.

BLACKBOROUGH. Pity you're in the Lords, Horsham.

TREBELL. Horsham, I'll devil for any man you choose to name ... feed him sentence by sentence....

HORSHAM. That's impossible.

TREBELL. Well, what's to become of my bill? I want to know.

BLACKBOROUGH. [_Casting his care on Providence._] We shall manage somehow.

Why, if you had died suddenly ... or let us say, never been born....

TREBELL. Then, Blackborough ... speaking as a dying man ... if you go back on the integrity of this scheme, I'll haunt you. [_Having said this with some finality, he turns his back._]

CANTELUPE. Cyril, I agree with what Trebell is saying. Whatever happens there must be no tampering with the comprehensiveness of the scheme.

Remember you are in the hands of the extremists ... on both sides. I won't support a compromise on one ... nor will they on the other.

HORSHAM. Well, I'll confess to you candidly, Trebell, that I don't know of any man available for this piece of work but you.

TREBELL. Then I should say it would be almost a relief to you if O'Connell tells on me to-morrow.

FARRANT. We seem to have got off that subject altogether. [_There comes a portentous tap at the door._] Good Lord!... I'm getting jumpy.

HORSHAM. Excuse me.

_A note is handed to him through the half opened door; and obviously it is at_ EDMUNDS _whom he frowns. Then he returns fidgetting for his gla.s.ses._

Oh, it turns out ... I'm so sorry you were blundered in here, Trebell ...

this man ... what's his name ... Edwards ... had been reading the papers and thought it was a cabinet council ... seemed proud of himself. This is from Wedgecroft ... scribbled in a messenger office. I never can read his writing ... it's like prescriptions. Can you?

_It has gradually dawned on the three men and then on_ TREBELL _what this note may have in it._ FARRANT _hand even trembles a little as he takes it. He gathers the meaning himself and looks at the others with a smile before he reads the few words aloud._

FARRANT. "All right. He has promised."

BLACKBOROUGH. O'Connell?

FARRANT. Thank G.o.d. [_He turns enthusiastically to_ TREBELL _who stands rigid._] My dear fellow ... I hope you know how glad I am.

CANTELUPE. I am very glad.