The Lawgivers: Gabriel Part 13

His interest in Lexa might well have made her a target for their frustrations rather than convincing them to stay away from her as head thought it would.

aThere are a number of reasons I objected to the program,a Gah-re-al responded finally, deciding to ignore the offer to save himself from any penalty by denying Lexa. aFirst and foremost because it taxes our own resources with no conclusive data that it will benefit our people in any way. I understand the theory is that there would be less trouble with the natives if they were lifted out of survival mode and taught how to take care of themselves, but it will take decades before we can even see if itas effectivea"just as weave already spent decades nurturing the flora and fauna in an effort to stabilize and improve this world. And tampering with the natives is liable to undo all the years spent trying to improve our own situation in regards to air quality and renewable resources. They must crawl before they can walk. The technology to preserve and protect the environment could be generations away if they must develop it themselves.a aYou were pretty vocal regarding your contempt of the savages and your certainty that nothing would civilize them or make them cease to be a problem short of exterminating them.a He hadnat been that vocal about it, d.a.m.n it! It was true that he had said as much, but head done no more than voiced his personal opinion a at that time. He hadnat made any attempt to influence the decision to save the natives and rehabilitate them. Head merely said that he thought it was a waste of time and energy.

His experiences with them prior to meeting Lexa had led to that conclusion and he still wasnat convinced that the majority could be saved or were worth saving. Half were wolves and the other half sheepa"dangerous predators or weak prey that would fall to the next predator as soon as the udai eliminated those of their own kind preying upon them.

With the exception of Lexa.

Head seen signs, though, that none of them had seen before when head taken Lexa in search of her siblings. The little farm Lexa had described wasnat a singular occurrencea"an evolutionary fluke. There had been others, enough to make it impossible to ignore the fact that the humans werenat as backwards as theyad all thought, not as savage and undisciplined. There was plenty of that going on but in the midst of it there were also humans struggling to build against all odds.

aI still have my doubts the program will succeed, but I had no vote in the decision and still donat. Iam a Lawgiver and satisfied to follow orders and allow others to make the decisionsa"for good or evil.a Justice Jon narrowed his eyes speculatively. aSo you wouldnat hesitate if you were ordered to exterminate them?a Gah-re-al felt a cold finger inch its way down his spine. A wave of nausea followed it. He maintained an expression void of emotion with an effort. aHas that been ordered?a Justice Mer-laine sent Justice Jon a furious glare. aIt has not! And it will not! We are not savages! We are a civilized people.a He paused for a long moment. aSince you havenat denied the charges of unlawful fraternization with a native, Lawgiver Gah-re-al, you will be fined one hundred credits and you are hereby ordered to have no further contact with the female in questiona"or any others. Iam not certain I understand the attraction you seem to have developed for the primitives, but we certainly donat want to risk cross-breeding with the natives and I also have a concern that that sort of ainterferencea could create more problems than we want to deal with. Furthermore, you are a Lawgiver and this gives rise to doubts regarding your ability to remain impartial and objective when judging them. If we receive similar reports in the future you will be removed as a lawgiver.a Whereas he could be impartial and objective as long as he despised them and remained too aloof to actually know them or understand them, Gah-re-al thought sardonically? Instead of voicing his opinion, however, he merely bowed at the judgment, keeping his expression carefully guarded as he left the chambers, but he was furious.

By the time he left the building, however, the rage had resolved itself into a queasiness in his gut. The fine was steepa"higher than head expecteda"but not the source of his anger and frustration.

He was forbidden to see Lexa again.

Chapter Fifteen.

Lexa had been stunned and awed when they had finally drawn close enough to see what had appeared to be a solid ma.s.s of green in the distance. In a sense, it was solid. Plants carpeted the earth, more plants than shead ever seen together in one place. There was so much green it made her dizzy.

There were trees, as well, she discovered as they descended from the sky, unlike anything shead ever seen, not scraggly stunted things barely taller than she was, but trees many times taller than her whose branches, fanning out like open arms, were so thickly covered in bright green leaves that they captured the rays of the sun and cast deep shadows beneath them.

It made her forget, for many moments, the turmoil that had besieged her since the village.

Ralph had been among the dead, but that hadnat seemed to especially please Gabriel and it hadnat relieved her nearly as much as shead thought it would. Mostly, shead just felt hollow, because his death didnat undo the things head done and shead discovered so many more just like him in her wanderings that she felt none of the freedom from fear that shead thought she would feel in knowing he could never touch her again.

She hadnat seen any sign of her little sister and brothers among the villagers and that had so distressed her that it was a while before it sank in that there was far more to the att.i.tudes of the villagers toward her than a natural distrust of strangers. And they were strangers. She saw none of the faces she remembered from her time there. Few of Ralphas men were even familiar to her.

They merely stared at her blankly when she questioned them about what had happened, however. It wasnat that they didnat know. She could see from the flicker in their eyes that they knew something, maybe everything, but they werenat about to tell her.

And it wasnat from fear, not entirely anyway.

It was because shead arrived with Gabriel. She knew that with sudden, blinding certainty when she caught some of the glances they divided between her and Gabriel.

That frightened her, enough that she was relieved when Gabriel told her that he would take her back to the others. She was too caught up in worrying over that circ.u.mstance and her misery that theyad failed to find any of her siblings to even think what returning her meant until she discovered that Gabriel had left her.

She didnat even know when head left.

Theyad landed near the edge of the encampment and Gabriel had escorted her to the woman he called Phil-a-shee. She didnat know what had pa.s.sed between them but their conversation certainly hadnat been cordial. Regardless of the even tone of voice both used, their expressions were so far from friendly Lexa had no doubt that it was a disagreement of some kind. She just didnat understand what it was about because she couldnat understand their language.

Phil-a-shee had finally turned her attention to her, though. aCome with me,a she said briskly.

Lexa glanced at Gabriel, but he seemed distracted. Since he didnat contradict Phil-a-sheeas order, though, or try to interfere, she allowed the woman to escort her away. She glanced back at Gabriel once. He was watching her, but he looked away when she turned back, focusing his attention on the others in the encampment.

Stumbling from her inattention to where she was going, Lexa caught herself, and, embarra.s.sed by her clumsiness, she didnat look for Gabriel again until Phil-a-shee deposited her with a small group of people seated on the ground around another udai. When she looked for him again, she discovered he was gone.

Dismay that seemed to surpa.s.s any that shead ever known immediately enveloped her. She felt like she was drowning in it. Her chest felt as if it would cave in and it was a struggle even to draw breath. She thought if it wasnat for that she wouldave burst into tears. She could feel them gathering in her eyes, could feel the painful need to expel her sorrow in racking sobs.

Fortunately, the udai shead been turned over to distracted her before she could betray herself so blatantly.

aYou! What name are you called, human?a Lexa jumped, but it still took her a moment to figure out that the udai man was speaking to her. Her voice came out as a croak when she spoke. aLexa.a aPay attention! Iam instructing.a She gaped at him for a moment and then glanced around at the other people in the group. She discovered two things at that moment that made listening nearly impossiblea"none of the people in the group were familiar and every single one of them was looking at her as if they hated her. It chilled her to her bones.

Lexa was relieved when the udai finished ainstructinga and told everyone to get up and follow him a until she discovered that Phil-a-shee had returned to collect her. aYou missed orientation,a she said sourly. aYouall come with me.a Lexa had no idea what she meant by orientation, but the way the woman looked at her when she said it made it fairly clear that she knew why Lexa hadnat been there and what she was doing instead of aorientationa. She was too miserable and too embarra.s.sed and too uneasy to object, however.

She saw why none of the people in the previous group had looked familiar to her when Phil-a-shee had left her before, though. As they crossed the wide field, she saw another group of people arriving. She thought at first that it was Gabriel leading them and quickened her step, nearly outrunning Phil-a-shee until they were close enough she discovered that the udai man leading the new group wasnat Gabriel.

aGather around!a Phil-a-shee said sharply, waving her arms at the people whoad just arrived. aQuiet! Settle down!a Everyone in the newly arrived group gaped at her and then each other and finally sat down, staring at the woman.

She smiled sourly, nodding her approval, and went to stand beside the udai man Lexa had mistaken for Gabriela"though she didnat know, now, why she had. She knew Gabriel had left for one thing and it wasnat logical to think he couldave returned with more people in the s.p.a.ce of time since shead seen he was gone. For another, once she got a closer look at the man Phil-a-shee referred to as Lawgiver Raphael, she saw that he looked nothing like Gabriel in the face and beyond that he was both taller and broader than Gabriel.

aThis forest,a she began, gesturing toward the thick trees that edged the open s.p.a.ce of the field, awas husbanded by the udai when we came to this world two decades ago. The plants herea"all that you seea"are native to this world just as you are and from what we have discovered forests like this once covered much of the world we now call Sho-dan, which in our tongue means blue gema"for the vast oceans that cover so much of this world that you natives once called Earth.a Lexa stared at the woman, wondering how she could know any of the things she was telling them if they had only come to it two decades beforea"whatever decades were.

The Lawgiver, Raphael, leaned closer to Phil-a-shee and spoke and she nodded. aA decade is a measurement of timea"something you will be taught. It is the worldas natural clock that will be important to all of you in rebuilding the civilization your people once had. You must know the seasons and be able to count the pa.s.sing days and seasons in order to grow food.a Despite her misery, excitement flooded Lexa at that. They were going to teach them how to farm? How to make plants grow so they could have plenty like Sir had told her? Shead had no idea that that was what Gabriel had meant when head said his people were going to teach hers how to have a better life! Truthfully, she hadnat been completely convinced, before, that that was what the udai intended.

aThis forest, as I said, is the result of husbandrya"taking care of the land, nurturing it. The forest had already begun to grow when we came, but it was in need of nutrientsa"food. The soil was poor and acidic. We had to achieve balance in order for the plants to grow strong.a Lexa lost interest about halfway through the speech and allowed her gaze and her mind to wander. There were too many words the woman used that she didnat understand for her to really grasp what the woman was telling them beyond the fact that she was claiming they, the udai, had made the forest.

Everyone else had begun to shift restlessly and a low murmur of speech began to make it difficult to hear the woman anyway.

aSilence!a Lexa jumped when the woman abruptly called that out in a commanding voice.

aYouare here to learn and to learn you must listen!a Resentment flickered through Lexa and apparently she wasnat the only one who felt it. She could see from their expressions that many of those around her were also affronted.

aThe first lesson will be in erecting a proper campsite. This is where you will build your new village.a Everyone in the group turned to the people around them and stared at them blankly.

aWe already got a village,a someone, a man, called out.

Phil-a-sheeas face tightened. aDid you build it?a she snapped.

Everyone stared at her blankly. aMostly it was there,a someone else volunteered.

aScavenged! Food and shelter are the basics of survival and learning how to provide for yourselves is the foundation of civilization. No one knows exactly how long you people have survived by scavenging from the civilization that collapsed, but there is a limit to those resources and itas past time you learned to provide for yourselves.a She cowed anyone else that might have thought to comment by glaring at them for several minutes and finally turned to the man with her, smiling. aThank you, Lawgiver Raphael. Iam sure they appreciate your help in bringing them here as much as we do.a Lawgiver Raphael gave her a sardonic look. aYes, they do look overjoyed,a he murmured. aIall leave them with you.a Phil-a-shee reddened, her smile turning a little brittle. When he turned and strode away, she stared at his back for a long moment and finally glanced at the people seated on the ground and then turned to look back at the sea of activity on the field, waving imperiously. Two udai men detached themselves from the ma.s.s and started toward them. aTur-ic, Ka-dena"divide them up and a.s.sign each group a task.a She turned to look at them again. aThe sooner you perform the tasks set, the more comfortable youall sleep tonight.a That part was almost inspiring after the miserable trek theyad hada"except that they were exhausted already and too weak from very little water and food to want to do anything but drop where they stood. That, they quickly discovered, however, wouldnat be allowed.

Lexa was part of the group Phil-a-shee a.s.sembled to gather food. She then marched them away from the rest of the group, lecturing them every step of the way on which plants were edible and which werenat, and that selection should also be made carefully to ensure that they didnat destroy as they were collecting so that there would be more food to collect later.

Lexa couldnat speak for anyone else, but she was so exhausted by the time theyad put together a camp Phil-a-shee found satisfactory and gathered food and found water that she had no interest in doing anything but sleeping.

That wasnat allowed either. They had to eat to gain the strength to work more the following day.

They worked from dawn till nightfall, an endless cycle of work, eat, sleep, only to get up the next day at dawn to do it all again. Lexa lost all track of time rather than gained a better understanding of it. She didnat have a clue of how what they were doing was supposed to help them build a civilization. It seemed to her that the vicious, repet.i.tive cycle was nothing more than a means unto itself, possibly aimed at working them to death but not likely to get them anywhere else.

They were aalloweda, translation ordered, to clear a patch of dirt to begin a garden that would eventually, they were told, sustain them without the need to hunt and gather. Phil-a-shee produced seeds with the air of a magician and emphasized their great value until everyone began to think that, maybe, the seeds were magical.

They didnat magically plant themselves, however, or magically clear the ground needed to plant them or magically water and tend themselves. All of that was a new task added to the tasks theyad already been given and everyone got the chance to experience that joy.

When everyone began to grumble, the angelsa"the udaia"merely drove them harder.

Lexa didnat know about the others, but she was pretty outraged when Phil-a-shee finally informed them that they were struggling for the next generation and the one after that.

Their struggles would build a world of plenty and comforta"for somebody else.

Even Phil-a-shee seemed to realize that that wasnat much to inspire the people she was driving like slaves, so she revised it to point out that it would improve their lot, alsoa"in a few growing seasons.

As Lexa straightened from the task of dumping yet another wicker basket full of clay for the cabin they were building, she caught a glimpse of a woman heading toward the forest and her heart seemed to stand still in her chest. She forgot to breathe for several moments.

The woman was nearing the edge of the thicket of woodlands when it occurred to her to call out to her. aMaura?a The woman turned toward her and Lexa saw her full in the face. A mixture of joy and disbelief filled her. Before she thought better of the impulse, she dropped the basket and raced toward the woman.

There was no sign of recognition on the womanas face. Instead, she looked for many moments as if she would run, but Lexa knew it was her. The closer she got the more certain she was. Shead changed. Her hair was darker than it had once been. Her face had lost the roundness of babyhood. She was taller and thinner, but it was her. She looked so much like their mother, Lexa knew it to the depths of her soul. aMaura!a she gasped breathlessly. aItas me, Lexa!a Just as dismay and doubt began to war with the joy and excitement of moments before, she saw the womanas eyes widen, saw the emotions flit across her face that shead felt herself. aLexa?a Lexa laughed with sheer joy. aYes! Itas me! Maura!a They collided in a tangle, laughing and crying at the same time and squeezing each other with bruising force.

aI never thought Iad see you again!a aWe thought you were dead.a aI canat believe it! Itas like a dream!a They stopped exclaiming their wonder and disbelief at almost the same moment, pulling apart to examine one another, to note the changes they saw, to grin at one another. aYouare so grown up now,a Lexa said with a chuckle. aI was afraid it wasnat you. I was so afraid, but I knew it was you.a Maura laughed. aYou didnat think Iad be a baby forever? I have babes of my own now.a Releasing her hold on Lexa, she turned and gestured toward two children Lexa hadnat noticed, a boy that looked to be nearing p.u.b.erty and a girl about half his age. aJohn, Sara, come and meet my big sister a your Aunt Lexa.a They both stared at her distrustfully, their eyes round with both hunger and uneasiness. It hurt to see them like that, to think of all the time shead missed never knowing they even existed. She smiled at them hopefully. aI donat look that bad, do I?a she said jokingly.

The little girl giggled, but it was more a nervous laugh than a carefree one. The boyas face lightened, but he didnat quite smile. They moved closer. Lexa wanted to grab both of them and hug them as she had her sister, but she knew better. Instead, she crouched a little lower so that she wasnat towering over them.

Well, she didnat tower over John anyway. He was at that stage where he was shooting up very quickly.

aWhere did you get that hair?a It was Sara whoad asked.

Surprise flickered through Lexa, but the question reminded her instantly of Gabriel. A sharp shaft of unhappiness went through her. aGabriel told me it must be from my father.a aHere now! Whatas going on? You wonat get things done standing around! Were you not a.s.signed tasks?a All four of them jumped at the sharp intrusion and whirled guiltily to gape at the udai woman marching toward them.

Maura grabbed her arm and leaned close. aMeet me at the stream after supper,a she whispered.

When she straightened, she met Lexaas gaze for a moment. aMoon rise,a she added and then summoned the children and rushed away. Lexa watched them go with a mixture of unhappiness and resentment. She hadnat seen her in so long! She didnat want to let her go.

When she saw the udai woman was nearly upon her, though, she rushed past her and retrieved her basket once more.

She discovered her exhaustion had vanished. Excitement and antic.i.p.ation threaded her veins. Questions filled her mind when she wasnat reliving the experience over and over. Inevitably, weariness began to take the upper hand long before dusk fell, however, and the antic.i.p.ation began to wane with her energy.

She was almost afraid to eat when she was allowed to, fearful that she would lapse into the exhausted coma that generally overtook her when she was finally allowed to sit down and fill her achingly empty stomach. Instead, she decided to compromise, to eat just enough to ease the pain and save the rest for after her visit.

It wasnat difficult to slip away. Despite the fact that the udai always kept a watchful eye on them, they were encouraged to go down to the stream and bathe before settling on their pallets. Not that many people did. The fear of fouling the water and making it undrinkable was ever present and far too ingrained for them to take the udaisa word for it that merely bathing the dirt off wouldnat contaminate it.

It was pretty much the only thing about the udai that gave Lexa any sense of kinshipa"echoes of her motheras reminders that bathing was a necessity, that cleanliness helped prevent sickness. It didnat cause it.

Unless of course the water was foul or poisoned.

Fortunately, since it was almost too dark to see her hand in front of her face beneath the trees, a narrow path had been cut, or worn down, between the field where they were building their new village and farms and the stream that supplied them with water. It seemed to Lexaa"well everyone had grumbleda"that it would have made more sense to build next to the stream, but the udai had berated them for laziness at the suggestion and pointed out that living aon topa of the stream and disposing of all of their waste in it would contaminate the water far faster and irreversibly than bathing in it. Waste was disposed of on the other side of the clearinga"all waste.

The first time one of the udai saw one of the men pull his d.i.c.k out and p.i.s.s where he was working, Lexa had thought they might kill the man on the spot. The udai had flown into a righteous rage. Theyad all been berated as stupid, disgusting animals and lectured for hours on the poisons they fed into the soil every time they urinated or defecated, reminded them that their water supply was close enough to be contaminated beyond use if they all decided to expel body waste practically on top of it, and that their food supply would become poisonous. By the time the furious lecture was over no one knew whether they most wanted to kill the man whoad tried to poison their water and the food theyad spent backbreaking hours and days trying to grow or the udai. It might not be reasonable to blame the udai for the incident, but resentment of the udai was growing by leaps and bounds, their fear of the asuperior beingsa slowly but surely being eroded and replaced by a hatred powerful enough to submerge all other considerations.

For herself, Lexa thought it was their att.i.tude of superiority that sp.a.w.ned it. Before, very few of them had had any sort of contact with the udaia"they were mysterious, powerful, unknown ent.i.ties that gave rise to fantastic myths and inspired terror. Now that theyad all had a chance to see them day in and day out and interact, they knew the udai werenat G.o.ds or G.o.d-like. They were very little different than the people they so clearly despised and considered inferior and they had the same flaws and weaknesses.

They didnat feel inferior to the udai, but they did feel just enough inferiority to resent the udai thinking they were superior and that had led them to begin ferreting out their weaknesses, at first just to rea.s.sure themselves and then because they despised being driven from dawn to dusk and lectured until it felt as if their heads would explode. If this was what the udai considered improving their lot then they wanted no part of it! Nothing was wrong with the way theyad lived beforea"it was their waya"and the d.a.m.ned udai didnat belong!

Lexa pushed her unpleasant thoughts to the back of her mind as she spied the gleam of moonlight on water ahead of her. Forgetting her weariness, she rushed the last few yards and looked around hopefully.

There was no sign of Maura and her heart plummeted with disappointment. A nearly overwhelming desire to burst into tears swept over her. Swallowing with an effort, she looked up and down the banks of the stream as far as she could see for any sign of her sister. This was the place where shead been told she could bathe, but maybe there were other places where people from other groups had been told to bathe?

Weariness settled heavily over her when she considered walking up and down the banks in search, but shead only had a few moments with Maura and it had been so long since shead seen her!

What if Maura had only been delayed, though? What if she walked down the bank and Maura came, decided she hadnat come, and left again?

There were so many people now it wouldnat be easy finding her again, not when the udai watched their movements so closely and kept them at task!

Finally, deciding she just couldnat sit still and wait when the anxiety was riding her that Maura had meant another place, she began walking along the bank. Shead gone only a few yards when she heard above her a great fluttering of wings. Whipping around, she searched the darkness of the sky fearfully and almost immediately spied an udai man. Her heart skipped several beats, first in fear, and then in dawning gladness. aGabriel?a She didnat wait for him to acknowledge her. The moonlight bathed one side of his face in just enough light for her to identify him. The thrill that went through her banished any sense of caution. She rushed toward him, halting abruptly a few feet away when the realization hit her that he wasnat her man. It might feel like he wasa"to hera"but head made it clear that he wasnat her man and never would be. To her surprise, he closed the distance between them, striding toward her and sweeping her into a tight embrace. aI never told you how much I like the way you say my name,a he said, his voice husky but threaded with amus.e.m.e.nt. aIt annoyed the h.e.l.l out of me at first, but Iave missed hearing you say it.a Relieved that he seemed as glad to see her as she was him, she struggled to curl her arms around him. aI donat say it right?a she murmured.

aYou say it just right,a he murmured, loosening his hold on her and dipping his head to skate his lips along her cheek in search of her mouth.

Lexa met him eagerly, desperate to familiarize herself with his taste and scent again, almost as anxious to tear her clothes off and feel him against her bare skin.

She didnat hear the sound that prompted Gabriel to release her and push her to one side so abruptly that she nearly fell down, but she heard the second sharp intake of breath.

aLexa?a The voice penetrated her confusion. aMaura?a she asked, peering around Gabriel. She saw her after a momentas search, cloaked in shadows near the tree line. aItas ok. Itas Gabriel.a aHeas one of them!a There was fear in Mauraas voice, but far more loathing. aI recognize him. Itas the b.a.s.t.a.r.d that dragged us to this h.e.l.lhole!a The confusion, barely cleared away, descended again as Lexaas mind went wild with many realizations at once. Gabriel had fulfilled his promise to her! Maura wasnat grateful. She was furious. Guilt flooded her. aHe did it for me,a she said a little lamely.

Maura gaped at her. aYou! You sent him after us! Why? Why would you do that?a Sheer stupidity? aI was afraid you were dead! Afraid of what was happening to you if you were still alive. Theyare trying to help us have a better life. I wanted that for you.a Maura stared at her a long moment and then turned hate filled eyes on Gabriel. aYou didnat used to be so stupid! The only abettera life theyare offering is the afterlife! Theyare gathering us all together so they can wipe us out. I canat believe youare with him! Iad heard rumors, but I didnat believe it was you they were talking about. I would never have believed it if I hadnat seen you with him!a

Chapter Sixteen.

Anger abruptly cleared away the confusion and the guilt. aHeas a good man,a Lexa said stiffly. aAnd heas been kind to me. He only went to look for you because I begged him to.a Gah-re-al shifted uncomfortably beside her. aAs much as Iad like for you to believe that, the truth is that we just made a sweep of the areas you showed me. I didnat know she was your sister. She looks nothing like you.a Lexa glanced at him as he spoke, but before she could respond, Maura spoke again.

aYou showed him the villages?a aMaura a.a Maura shook her head. aI donat know you and I donat want to know you! They killed my man!a Her face crumpled. She uttered a harsh sob that stabbed Lexa like a knife. aI loved him and heas dead and itas your fault!a Horror washed over Lexa. She thought for several moments after Maura had whirled around and run away that she would puke. She dropped weakly to the ground, covering her face with her hands and burst into tears. aOh G.o.d! What have I done? I didnat mean it!a Gabriel stared down at her a moment, debating whether to leave or try to comfort her and try to explain. Finally, he knelt in front of her. aYou havenat done anything wrong.a Lexa s.n.a.t.c.hed her hands down. aI did! I told you where to find them! I trusted you!a she screamed at him. aAnd you killed her man! Sheall never forgive me! And why should she? I would never forgive her if she did that to me! If youad been a.a Gah-re-al felt some of the heaviness lift from him. aIf Iad been a?a Lexa sucked her bottom lip in and shook her head angrily.

Gah-re-al grasped her upper arms. aThere was a battle no one antic.i.p.ated,a he growled. aThree of the lawgivers were killed in the skirmish.a Fear squeezed Lexaas heart painfully, fear for Gabriel, but in a moment her guilt and anger overshadowed it. aHow many of my people died?a she demanded angrily.

Gah-re-al released her abruptly and stood up. aYou asked me to find your siblings. I promised that I would try. Beyond that, my orders were to round up all of the humans I found for rehabilitation and relocation. We walked in to a trapa"with no notion that we would find anything different than weave found in every other villagea"amoral tyrants brutalizing the innocent. Instead, we discovered that they not only knew we were coming, theyad prepared to fight to the deatha"and they knew about our weapons and they knew how to get around them.a Lexa stared at him for a long moment, wavering, torn by her guilt over having a hand in Mauraas loss and the realization that Gabriel couldave died.

And all of it was her fault!

aI trusted you. I believed in you.a Her chin wobbled so hard she couldnat speak for a moment. aI would have done anything for you. I loved you, but you only wanted to use me.a Gah-re-al swallowed a little sickly. aBut you feel none of those things anymore?a Lexa discovered she couldnat bring herself to confirm ita"because it wasnat true. She wasnat going to give him the satisfaction of knowing just how thoroughly head duped her, though!

aIf youad felt any of those things,a Gah-re-al growled after a long moment, ait would take more than the words of a woman you havenat seen since she was a child to convince you! You donat know her!a Lexa swallowed with an effort around the knot in her throat, struggling with the urge to believe him, with the doubts head given rise to.