The Colloquies of Erasmus Part 53

_Ma._ Well, if that will do, I do love you again.

_Pa._ Ay, But I would have that Love constant as mine own. I court a Wife, not a Mistress.

_Ma._ I suppose so, but yet we ought to be very deliberate in that which being once done, can never be undone again.

_Pa._ I have been deliberating too long already.

_Ma._ Love is none of the best Advisers; see that he han't impos'd upon you, for they say he is blind.

_Pa._ But that Love has Eyes in his Head, that proceeds from Judgment; you don't appear so amiable, only because I love you, but you are really so, and therefore I love you.

_Ma._ But perhaps you don't know me thoroughly. When once a Shoe is on, then you'll know where it pinches.

_Pa._ I'll venture it, but I gather from many Conjectures, that it will be happy for me.

_Ma._ What, are you an Augur then?

_Pa._ Yes, I am.

_Ma._ Pray by what Auguries do you prognosticate all this? What, hath the Night Owl appear'd luckily?

_Pa._ She flies for Fools.

_Ma._ Did you see a pair of Pigeons on your right Hand?

_Pa._ Nothing of all this. But have for some Years been satisfy'd of the Honesty of your Father and Mother; and in the first Place, that's no bad Sign. Nor am I ignorant how modestly and religiously you have been brought up by them, and it is a greater Advantage to be honestly educated, than honourably born. And then there's another good Circ.u.mstance besides, that as my Parents are none of the worst, so yours and mine have been very intimate for many Years, and you and I have known one another from our very Childhood, as they use to say; and besides all this, our Humours agree very well together. Our Age, Fortunes, Quality, and Parentage are pretty equal. And last of all, that which is the chief Thing in Friendship, your Temper seems to agree very well with mine. There are some Things that may be very good in themselves that may not agree with others. How acceptable my Temper may be to yours, I don't know. These are the Auguries, my Dear, that make me prognosticate that a Marriage between you and me would be happy, lasting, comfortable and pleasant, unless you shall prevent it by a Denial.

_Ma._ What would you have me say?

_Pa._ I will sing _I am thine_ first, and you shall sing _I am thine_ after me.

_Ma._ That indeed is but a short Song, but it has a long Chorus.

_Pa._ What signifies it how long it is, so it be a merry one.

_Ma._ I have that Respect for you, I would not have you do what you should repent of when done.

_Pa._ Leave off teasing me.

_Ma._ Perhaps I shall not appear so amiable in your Eye, when Age or Sickness have spoil'd my Beauty.

_Pa._ No more, my Dear, shall I myself be always so young and l.u.s.ty. I don't only look at that blooming, lovely Body of yours, but it is your Guest within it I am most in Love with.

_Ma._ What Guest do you mean?

_Pa._ This Soul of yours, whose Beauty will grow as Years increase.

_Ma._ In Truth you have a very penetrating Sight, if you can see that through so many Coverings.

_Pa._ It is with the Eyes of my Mind that I see your Mind, and then besides we shall be ever and anon renewing our Age by our Children.

_Ma._ But then I shall lose my Maidenhead.

_Pa._ Right enough; but prithee tell me, if you had a fine Orchard, would you rather chuse never to have nothing but Blossoms on the Trees; or would you rather, that the Blossoms should fall off, and see the Boughs laden with ripe Apples?

_Ma._ Oh, how cunningly you can argue!

_Pa._ Answer me but this one Question, which is the finest Sight, a Vine lying along upon the Ground and rotting, or twining round a Stake or an Elm-Tree, loaden with ripe Grapes of a curious purple Colour?

_Ma._ And pray do you answer me this Question; which is the most pleasant Sight, a Rose fresh and fair upon the Tree, or one gathered and withering in the Hand?

_Pa._ I look upon that the happier Rose that dies in a Man's Hand; there delighting the Sight and Smell, than that which withers away upon the Bush, for it would die there, if it were let alone. As that Wine has the most Honour done it; that is drank before it grows dead: Though this is to be said, that the Flower of a Maid does not presently fade, as soon as she is married: Nay, I have seen a great many, that before Marriage look'd pale and languid, and just as if they were dropping into the Ground: but having been in the Embraces of a Husband, they have brightened up, just as if they just then began to bloom.

_Ma._ But for all that, a Maidenhead is accounted a fine Thing.

_Pa._ A young Virgin is indeed a pretty Thing: But what's more monstrous than an old Maid? If your Mother had not shed that Blossom, we should never have had this fine Flower, yourself. And if we don't make a barren Match, as I hope we shan't, there will be never a Maid the less for us.

_Ma._ But they say Chast.i.ty is very well pleasing to G.o.d.

_Pa._ And for that Reason I would marry a chaste Maid, that I may live chastly with her. The Union of Minds will be more than that of Bodies.

We'll get Subjects for the King, and Servants for Christ, and where will the Unchast.i.ty of this Matrimony be? And who can tell but we may live together like _Joseph_ and _Mary_? And in the mean Time, we'll learn to be Virgins, we don't arrive at Perfection all at once.

_Ma._ What do you talk of? Is Virginity to be violated, that it may be learned?

_Pa._ Why not? As by little and little drinking Wine sparingly, we learn to be abstemious. Which do you think is the most temperate Person, he that is sitting at a Table full of Delicacies, and abstains from them, or he who is out of the Reach of those Things that incite Intemperance?

_Ma._ I think he is the most temperate Person, that the greatest Plenty can't debauch.

_Pa._ Which is the most laudable for Chast.i.ty, he that castrates himself, or he that having his Members entire, forbears Venery?

_Ma._ The latter, in my Opinion: I should call the former a Madman.

_Pa._ Don't they in a Manner castrate themselves, that abjure Matrimony?

_Ma._ I think they do.

_Pa._ Then it is no Virtue to forbear Coition.

_Ma._ Is it not?

_Pa._ I prove it thus; if it were of itself a Virtue not to copulate, it were a Sin to do it: so that it follows of Consequence, it is a Fault not to copulate, and a Virtue to do it.

_Ma._ When does this Case happen?

_Pa._ As often as the Husband requires his due of his Wife; especially if he would embrace her for the Sake of Procreation.

_Ma._ But if it be out of Wantonness? Is it not lawful to deny him?