The Alchemist Part 13

SUR. You are valiant out of company!

KAS. Yes, how then, sir?

[ENTER DRUGGER, WITH A PIECE OF DAMASK.]

FACE. Nay, here's an honest fellow, too, that knows him, And all his tricks. Make good what I say, Abel, This cheater would have cozen'd thee o' the widow. -- [ASIDE TO DRUG.] He owes this honest Drugger here, seven pound, He has had on him, in two-penny'orths of tobacco.

DRUG. Yes, sir. And he has d.a.m.n'd himself three terms to pay me.

FACE. And what does he owe for lotium?

DRUG. Thirty shillings, sir; And for six syringes.

SUR. Hydra of villainy!

FACE. Nay, sir, you must quarrel him out o' the house.

KAS. I will: - Sir, if you get not out of doors, you lie; And you are a pimp.

SUR. Why, this is madness, sir, Not valour in you; I must laugh at this.

KAS. It is my humour: you are a pimp and a trig, And an Amadis de Gaul, or a Don Quixote.

DRUG. Or a knight o' the curious c.o.xcomb, do you see?

[ENTER ANANIAS.]

ANA. Peace to the household!

KAS. I'll keep peace for no man.

ANA. Casting of dollars is concluded lawful.

KAS. Is he the constable?

SUB. Peace, Ananias.

FACE. No, sir.

KAS. Then you are an otter, and a shad, a whit, A very tim.

SUR. You'll hear me, sir?

KAS. I will not.

ANA. What is the motive?

SUB. Zeal in the young gentleman, Against his Spanish slops.

ANA. They are profane, Lewd, superst.i.tious, and idolatrous breeches.

SUR. New rascals!

KAS. Will you begone, sir?

ANA. Avoid, Sathan! Thou art not of the light: That ruff of pride About thy neck, betrays thee; and is the same With that which the unclean birds, in seventy-seven, Were seen to prank it with on divers coasts: Thou look'st like antichrist, in that lewd hat.

SUR. I must give way.

KAS. Be gone, sir.

SUR. But I'll take A course with you -- ANA. Depart, proud Spanish fiend!

SUR. Captain and doctor.

ANA. Child of perdition!

KAS. Hence, sir! -- [EXIT SURLY.] Did I not quarrel bravely?

FACE. Yes, indeed, sir.

KAS. Nay, an I give my mind to't, I shall do't.

FACE. O, you must follow, sir, and threaten him tame: He'll turn again else.

KAS. I'll re-turn him then.

[EXIT.]

[SUBTLE TAKES ANANIAS ASIDE.]

FACE. Drugger, this rogue prevented us for thee: We had determin'd that thou should'st have come In a Spanish suit, and have carried her so; and he, A brokerly slave! goes, puts it on himself. Hast brought the damask?

DRUG. Yes, sir.

FACE. Thou must borrow A Spanish suit. Hast thou no credit with the players?

DRUG. Yes, sir; did you never see me play the Fool?

FACE. I know not, Nab: -- Thou shalt, if I can help it. -- [ASIDE.] Hieronimo's old cloak, ruff, and hat will serve; I'll tell thee more when thou bring'st 'em. [EXIT DRUGGER.]

ANA. Sir, I know The Spaniard hates the brethren, and hath spies Upon their actions: and that this was one I make no scruple. -- But the holy synod Have been in prayer and meditation for it; And 'tis revealed no less to them than me, That casting of money is most lawful.

SUB. True. But here I cannot do it: if the house Shou'd chance to be suspected, all would out, And we be locked up in the Tower for ever, To make gold there for the state, never come out; And then are you defeated.

ANA. I will tell This to the elders and the weaker brethren, That the whole company of the separation May join in humble prayer again.

SUB. And fasting.

ANA. Yea, for some fitter place. The peace of mind Rest with these walls!

[EXIT.]

SUB. Thanks, courteous Ananias.

FACE. What did he come for?

SUB. About casting dollars, Presently out of hand. And so I told him, A Spanish minister came here to spy, Against the faithful -- FACE. I conceive. Come, Subtle, Thou art so down upon the least disaster! How wouldst thou ha' done, if I had not help't thee out?

SUB. I thank thee, Face, for the angry boy, i'faith.

FACE. Who would have look'd it should have been that rascal, Surly? he had dyed his beard and all. Well, sir. Here's damask come to make you a suit.

SUB. Where's Drugger?

FACE. He is gone to borrow me a Spanish habit; I'll be the count, now.

SUB. But where's the widow?

FACE. Within, with my lord's sister; madam Dol Is entertaining her.

SUB. By your favour, Face, Now she is honest, I will stand again.

FACE. You will not offer it.

SUB. Why?

FACE. Stand to your word, Or -- here comes Dol, she knows -- SUB. You are tyrannous still.

[ENTER DOL, HASTILY.]

FACE. Strict for my right. -- How now, Dol! Hast [thou] told her, The Spanish count will come?

DOL. Yes; but another is come, You little look'd for!

FACE. Who's that?

DOL. Your master; The master of the house.

SUB. How, Dol!

FACE. She lies, This is some trick. Come, leave your quiblins, Dorothy.

DOL. Look out, and see.

[FACE GOES TO THE WINDOW.]

SUB. Art thou in earnest?

DOL. 'Slight, Forty of the neighbours are about him, talking.

FACE. 'Tis he, by this good day.

DOL. 'Twill prove ill day For some on us.

FACE. We are undone, and taken.

DOL. Lost, I'm afraid.

SUB. You said he would not come, While there died one a week within the liberties.

FACE. No: 'twas within the walls.

SUB. Was't so! cry you mercy. I thought the liberties. What shall we do now, Face?

FACE. Be silent: not a word, if he call or knock. I'll into mine old shape again and meet him, Of Jeremy, the butler. In the mean time, Do you two pack up all the goods and purchase, That we can carry in the two trunks. I'll keep him Off for to-day, if I cannot longer: and then At night, I'll ship you both away to Ratcliff, Where we will meet to-morrow, and there we'll share. Let Mammon's bra.s.s and pewter keep the cellar; We'll have another time for that. But, Dol, 'Prythee go heat a little water quickly; Subtle must shave me: all my captain's beard Must off, to make me appear smooth Jeremy. You'll do it?

SUB. Yes, I'll shave you, as well as I can.

FACE. And not cut my throat, but trim me?

SUB. You shall see, sir.

[EXEUNT.]

ACT 5. SCENE 5.1.

BEFORE LOVEWIT'S DOOR.

ENTER LOVEWIT, WITH SEVERAL OF THE NEIGHBOURS.

LOVE. Has there been such resort, say you?

1 NEI. Daily, sir.

2 NEI. And nightly, too.

3 NEI. Ay, some as brave as lords.

4 NEI. Ladies and gentlewomen.

5 NEI. Citizens' wives.

1 NEI. And knights.

6 NEI. In coaches.

2 NEI. Yes, and oyster women.