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"Then be sweet to them for my sake. Your grandmother, she's going to be unlike anyone you have ever known. She's a great one to pick up the bread crumbs of life with a great ado. That's been her existence, dear--little things. And your grandfather, Zoe, he's so gentle. Somehow I imagine he is even gentler now. You remember I used to tell you how we'd play at hide and seek long after I was grown. Oh, Zoe, be sweet!"
"I will, dear."
"And--your father. Whatever his att.i.tude may be, remember the fault lies in me--not him."
"Trust me, Lilly, if only he doesn't drop dead when he sees me!"
"Zoe!"
Between them the little drama was carefully rehea.r.s.ed.
"Visi would pay big money for this act."
"You'll be your own natural sweet self, Zoe? No posing?"
"Don't worry. I suppose if the truth is known I'll have an aggravated case of stage fright."
"They'll know--everything, Zoe, before I let them see you. Just be simple, dear--and please--no dramatics!"
"It's all too dramatic for dramatics," she replied, cryptically.
It was finally decided that Lilly was to meet the train alone, settle the trio at the Hotel Astor, and arrive at the apartment in time for a dinner prepared by a cook and waitress especially brought in for the day.
"Break the news in a public place, Lilly--the hotel lobby or a taxi---and avoid family fireworks."
"My news can't be broken."
"Why?"
"Smashed, rather."
At four o'clock the morning of the arrival, Lilly was up, moving with the aimlessness of great nervousness about the apartment. At that same hour Mrs. Becker was emerging backward from her sleeper, kimono-clad, and bulging through the curtains into the dark aisle.
"Carrie," her husband whispered after her, jutting his head out with a turtle's dart, "it's only three o'clock, Eastern time. Why are you getting up?"
"Because I want to," she said, plowing on.
Once in the dressing room, she fell to crying as she staggered and dressed, apparently because each object, as she took it up, fell from her fingers.
And yet the meeting occurred, as dreaded and antic.i.p.ated moments often do, damply, and as a heavily loaded bomb, for one reason or another, can go off with a cat cough.
To the observer, what happened that early afternoon was simply a very trim and very tailored young woman, her boyishness of attire somewhat accentuated because her swift clean-cutness was so obviously its inspiration, greeting, in the marble vastness of Grand Central Terminal, a trio of what was plainly a pair of travel-stained parents and perhaps an uncle.
Standing there peering between the grillwork as the train slid in through the greasy gloom, watching the run of "red caps" and the slow disgorging of pa.s.sengers, Lilly saw it all in waves of movement, waves of heat, waves of gaseous unreality.
Then she spied them. Her mother in the old, familiar vanguard, her father with that bulge to his back from which the gray coat hung loosely, Albert struggling to save his luggage from the fiery piracy of a "red cap."
Her first sense was of fatness, their incredible, caravaning, lumbaginous fatness! There was a new chin to her mother. Gone was the old pulled-in waistline, but the old love of finery was out on her hat in ostrich plumes, a boa of marabou lending further elegance. And her father! He was somehow behind himself, slanting out from neck to quite a bulge of abdomen, then receding again to legs that caught her throat with a sense of their being too thin to sustain him. The fringe of hair that showed beneath his slouch hat was quite white, too, and with that same clutch at her throat she saw that it was thin as a baby's can be thin.
It is doubtful if she would have known Penny. He was himself in sebaceous italics. The old stolidity of stature was there, but hardly the solidity. Like Mrs. Becker, he had chubbied up, so to speak, until he looked shorter. And Albert was bald. It showed out under the rear of his derby, like a well-scrubbed visage awaiting some deft hand to sketch in the features, as poor Harry had done it to the clothespins. His Scandinavian blondness was quite gone; there was just a fringe of tan hair left and his jowls hung a bit, of skin not quite filled with flesh.
All this in a telegraphic flash as she stood there waiting, and at the sight of her father, on his too thin legs, dragging his cane slightly so that it sc.r.a.ped, and in the other hand a sagging old black valise that she remembered, all the tightness at her throat relaxed suddenly, the tears coming so easily that she could smile through them.
The dragging of that cane, it hurt her poignantly, as little vagrant memories can.
They spied her out even as she spied them, and, bodybeat to bodybeat, she and her mother met, shaking to silent sobs and twisting hearts. Then her father, pressing the coldly smelling mustache to her lips and lifting her in the old way by the armpits, so that the instant closed over her like a swoon.
With Albert it was strangely easier; there was a pause as wide as a hair while he stood there blinking, and weighted with his unsurrendered luggage.
"Albert," she said, finding the word at last.
At that moment, a "red cap," wild for fee, made for one of the brand-new leather cases.
"Let go," he cried, in small anger. "That is a six-dollar-and-ninety-eight-cent bag you are jerking."
Then he brought his gaze back to Lilly, his Adam's apple above the gray necktie throbbing so that it seemed to her his entire body must reverberate to the pistonlike process.
"Well," he said. "Well, well," the words dropping down into the dry well of a gulp.
But somehow after the episode of the luggage, everything was easier, for Lilly at least. She could smile now.
Very presently they were actually in a taxicab together, the talk of the moment echoing against the silence of unspoken words taking shape between them.
"Papa!" she said, finally, from the little folding seat opposite him, stroking his hands and steadying herself with them against the throw of the cab. "Oh, papa, papa!"
He smiled back through crinkles that were new to her, patting her in turn and looking off.
Mrs. Becker fell to crying, pressing her handkerchief up against her eyes and trying to lift her veil above the tears.
"After all these years," she kept repeating. "Years. Years."
"Now, now, Carrie--you promised."
"What hotel?" asked Penny, one of the bags across his knees and one weather eye for the other on the driver's seat.
"The Astor; that is one of the best. I've your rooms all arranged for.
My--my place is too small."
"A less expensive would do, wouldn't it, mother?" addressing himself, without once meeting Lilly's eye, to his mother-in-law.
"You're my guests," she said, trying to smile down old aversions. "This is my party."
"Years--" sobbed Mrs. Becker. "She looks the same, but I'm a stranger to my own child. Ben, we're strangers."
They were all suddenly in tears, Mr. Becker laying a clumsy hand to his wife's arm.
"Carrie, you promised--"