Shades Of Submission: Fifty By Fifty Part 86

It took a few days, but I managed to open a new bank account, and I got a new job working retail once again. I imagined if I was going to go back into nursing I would have to start all over again, I didn't want to use Julia Marley's credits, as once again, it could be traced back to me.

I always kind of figured that time would dull the pain. That the longer things went on, that the more time I spent being Julie Murray, the more I would forget about Julia Marley's old life, the more I would forget how good I felt whenever I was in Blake's arms. But, it didn't quite work like that.

Instead, I found myself constantly depressed. I got myself a studio apartment, and when my shift was over I would just go back home, curl up in the blankets on the free couch I found on Craigslist and cry myself to sleep. I had no one to talk to. I couldn't even call Anna, she wouldn't understand. I missed Blake. I missed him more than anything. I wanted to desperately to be with him, wanted so much for him to hold me in his arms every single day, and yet I knew that he never would again.

Time and time again I thought back to that conversation that we had, about justice. This wasn't justice. I had a restraining order, and yet Tom broke it to come and threaten me. What if I had just gone to the police and reported it? He would have probably been picked up, questioned, and then let go, free to make my life a living h.e.l.l and hurt the people I loved.

No, this wasn't justice. Blake had told me the story about the bullies, how in the end he got his justice by being a stronger person and becoming a billionaire. But when was I going to get my justice? Sitting on a couch crying myself to sleep, knowing that I would never again see the man I loved wasn't justice. Tom had won. He had destroyed my life, even after I had left him.

Two months later, I was finally starting to feel better. I still cursed Tom every single opportunity I had. At night I dreamed about finally getting my revenge, my own little violent murder fantasies made me feel better, even though I knew that no matter what I would never be able to act on them. That just wasn't who I was.

I had found a job as a receptionist at a veterinary clinic, which was a job I enjoyed, to the point where I was thinking that since I had to start my education all over from scratch again I might become a veterinary technician instead. I liked working with animals, and the office cat that kept me company all day was a welcome friend. I was even starting to make a friend or two here and there at the office.

Then, one Friday afternoon, when everything was quiet for once, I went out the back to visit with the little animal friends who were staying with us overnight. There were two dogs from the shelter that the vets spayed at low cost, and a cat who had just undergone surgery to remove an infected tooth. She was purring as I scratched her behind the ears, when suddenly I heard the bell at the front office. Giving her one last pat, I made my way over there, wondering who was here, as the next appointment wasn't due for another fifteen minutes.

When I turned the corner and had a look at the new visitor, I stopped in my tracks. My mouth dropped open.

Standing there, in the middle of the room, was none other than Blake Andrews.

My heart immediately started racing in my chest. I'm not sure how long I stood there, just staring at him.

"What are... what are you doing here?" I finally asked. Probably not the reception he was expecting, but I wasn't exactly expecting to see him here, either.

"I came to see if you'd be willing to come home."

"Home?"

"To New York. With me."

"How did you find me?"

"It's a long story."

"We're not busy," I replied, motioning around the virtually empty vet's office.

"Let me take you out to dinner, when does your shift end?" Blake asked.

"In an hour. Come back then, I'll be here."

"You won't run away from me, this time?" Blake asked with a smile, and I immediately knew he wasn't mad. I wanted nothing more than to run into his arms right then and there, but I knew I couldn't. I had to make him understand that Tom was serious, that I honestly believed he would harm Blake if given the opportunity.

"I won't. I promise," I replied, and Blake came over and kissed me on the cheek, softly.

"See you in an hour then," he whispered softly into my ear. Just hearing those words made my knees weak and my blood start to boil. G.o.d, I had missed him. I had missed him so much.

Sure enough, at five past five, as I left the office, Blake was waiting next to a rented Toyota sedan.

"Moved down in the world have you?" I joked, motioning at the completely ordinary car.

"They were out of Ferraris at the rental place," he replied with a shrug and a grin, which I returned.

"This one is probably less conspicuous anyway," I replied as I climbed in. We drove in silence for ten minutes before finding a nice little diner on an out-of-the-way street that looked decent. We went inside, were led to a private booth in the far back of the restaurant, as Blake had asked for. The waitress brought over a couple sodas, and Blake and I started to talk.

"I wish you'd come to me, instead of just leaving."

"I know. But I couldn't. I knew if I waited, I knew if I looked into your eyes, that I wouldn't have had the guts to do it. I wouldn't have been able to, and it was what needed to be done."

"No, it wasn't. There were other options. There are always other options."

I shook my head, sadly.

"Not with Tom. He came up to me in the street, choked me in broad daylight, and told me that if I didn't leave you he was going to kill you. I wasn't going to let that happen."

"So you left. I can understand it, but I wish you'd come to me. We can work something out. Besides, I'd rather live my life in danger with you than safely without you," Blake told me, and the crushing guilt built up inside of me. Had I made the wrong choice?

"How did you find me? We have time, now," I asked him in reply.

"It wasn't easy. I figured you weren't just going to use your credit cards or bank account or anything, and I saw your phone on the dresser and knew you were going to try and really hide. So I hired four private investigators. Two to cover the east coast, since I figured that was where you were most likely going to go, since you've been here your whole life. One to the west coast, and one to the south. I basically wrote them a blank cheque and said to find you. Yesterday I got a call from my east coast man, saying you were working at a vet clinic in Philly. So I came out to see myself if it really was you. I didn't want to let myself believe it until I finally lay eyes on you."

"Well, I'd be lying if I didn't say I was flattered by the extent you went to in order to find me," I replied, and that was the truth. It did feel nice to know that Blake went to every length he could to get me back.

"I would have gone to the ends of the earth for you Julia. I love you."

My breath caught in my throat. Had Blake really just said that? I mean, I'd known for ages that I loved him, but I had never imagined that he might feel the same way so early in the relationship, and told me about it.

"I love you too," I replied, breathlessly.

"You're hands down the strongest woman I know. One hundred percent. You've overcome such major obstacles and were making such a good life for yourself. That's why I'm so surprised that you gave up and left New York."

"I couldn't let anything happen to you. I would have hated myself if because of me I lost the best thing that had ever happened to me. I love you so much that I had to go to make sure you'd be safe."

"You didn't have to go. Come back with me. I know you're worried about Tom. Let me deal with him. Please. I'll make sure he doesn't hurt us."

"You don't know Tom."

"I know his type. Believe me. My father hit my mother at least once a week, until he finally died of liver cancer. I know people like Tom. I can protect us from him. Both of us. I promise, Julia. But please, come back with me."

I sat there, stunned at the realization that Blake knew exactly what I had gone through. Not directly, of course, but he had grown up with it. He knew what it meant. It explained why he was so protective, so kind with me. I had always sensed that he would never hit me, and I now understood exactly why. He had seen the destructive power of it growing up. And I knew what I had to do.

"Yeah. Ok. I'll come back to New York. We'll handle this together." I smiled at Blake. "Let me go get some things and we can drive back tonight."

"Great! Oh, Julia, you have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that. I promise you, I'll protect you."

"I know."

Two hours later we were back on the road, with coffees in hand, on the way back to New York City.

When we finally got back, late at night, Blake and I collapsed into bed. It felt so good to be back in his apartment, to be back in his arms. Immediately I wondered what on earth I was thinking by leaving. I should have known that Blake would have done whatever was necessary to take care of me. Still, I was too exhausted to think about anything that night, and slept more soundly than I had in a long, long time.

In the morning, when I finally woke up, the sun was high in the sky. I found a note from Blake on the kitchen counter, telling me that in the afternoon a couple people would be coming by to improve security on the apartment. I had to admire the speed at which Blake got things done, he was taking this seriously. In the back of my mind, however, I wondered if he was taking it seriously enough. After all, Tom had been pretty explicit with his threat.

I got a call from Kevin a couple of hours later.

"Hey, Julia, Kevin here."

"Oh, hi Kevin, how are you?"

"I'm good, Blake caught me up on everything, told me about Tom breaking that restraining order. I'm advising you as your lawyer to report it."

"Seriously? It was a while ago now, will it make a difference?"

"Absolutely. Even if it doesn't do anything straight away, you'll be on record reporting it. You can tell them the truth, that when he broke it you were scared and ran away. I'm not saying it'll be the easiest thing in the world to do, but it will be important to have that on record."

"In case Tom comes back, right?"

"Exactly."

"Ok, I'll do it."

"Perfect. Meet me at the office at three, and I'll go down with you to the precinct."

"Thanks, Kevin," I replied before hanging up the phone. I tossed it onto the couch and sighed. Of course this wasn't going to be easy. It was never going to be. But it would be for the best. I kept telling myself that.

Sure enough, when I reported the breach of the restraining order, I was pretty sure the cop thought I was making it up once I mentioned the timeline. I explained why I left, that I was terrified, and thought it was the best option, but I could tell he didn't believe me. Still, at least he took the report, at Kevin's urging, and promised to pa.s.s it on to a supervisor who would take care of it.

My complaint was in writing, and that was what mattered, I kept reminding myself.

Still, the stress was eating at me. I knew Blake could tell, and I knew he was worried. Finally, one night we were eating dinner and he told me we were going away for a holiday for a few days.

"I can tell you need a break. I can't spare much time from work, so it'll just have to be a long weekend, but I'm going to take you somewhere nice, where you can relax, ok?"

"That sounds great," I smiled, filled with appreciation and grat.i.tude. I loved that Blake always knew exactly what was perfect for me at any given time. "Where are we going?"

"I was thinking somewhere warm. So obviously, Grand Cayman Island came to mind," he replied with a wink, and I could have sworn I was going to pa.s.s out right then and there.

"Oh my G.o.d! Awesome!" I exclaimed. I couldn't wait to go back to the location of the best week of my life.

"We're leaving in the morning, so you'd better pack your things," Blake told me. Our flight back leaves Sunday night.

"I can't wait. Thank you, Blake. You're so thoughtful. I really need this," I told him with a smile.

Twelve hours later Mike was driving us to the airport for the early morning flight over to the Caribbean. Blake suggested we sleep on the plane to maximize the day, and I thought it was a great idea. The one good thing about driving through New York at six in the morning was that traffic was pretty light.

We drove to the airport, but instead of following the signs to the terminal, Mike turned us down a service road.

"Wait, where are we going," I asked Blake.

"To the plane," he replied. A minute or two later we arrived at a hangar with a Gulfstream sitting in the middle, and I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped to the floor.

"Holy s.h.i.t," were the words that came out of my mouth, and Blake laughed.

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, I don't really fly commercial."

"No kidding," I replied as we got out of the car. I felt like a rock star as I climbed the steps into the private jet. All this moment needed was a crowd of ecstatic teenagers shouting my name. When I got to the top of the steps, I couldn't help myself. I turned and waved at the imaginary crowd, causing Blake to burst out into laughter as he waited behind me.

"Oh, like you've never done that before," I teased, poking my tongue out at him as I turned back around and into the plane.

"You know, I can say with complete and total honesty that I haven't," he replied. I stepped into the plane and was immediately greeted by the pilot, who introduced himself as Greg, and Carmen, the flight attendant. I couldn't believe there was going to be a flight attendant there just for the two of us.

I leaned back in one of the plush leather seats.

"Man, I'm never going to be able to fly economy again," I muttered as I closed my eyes, suddenly realizing just how easy it was going to be to have a nap in a plane like this.

"You'll never have to, if you stick with me," Blake replied with a wink.

"Well now that I have a reason to stick around..."I joked as Carmen brought us a couple coffees from the espresso machine at the front of the plane. I pa.s.sed on mine and instead asked for a blanket, which Carmen immediately brought, and decided to get some sleep.

Unfortunately I didn't get to enjoy the luxurious cabin of Blake's private jet for too long, as the soft, rhythmic sound of the engines outside lulled me to sleep pretty quickly, and I didn't wake up again until Blake softly shook my shoulder, telling me we were about to land in Georgetown.

As the cabin door opened and a blast of warm air hit me, I knew this was the perfect way to relax and try and forget about the stresses that were eating me up back in New York. A man was waiting with a car to take us back to the resort, though it wasn't Louis this time, and to my surprise, we pulled up twenty minutes later to the Grand Isis resort.

"Wow, same place!" I muttered as we were led into the most luxurious place I had ever stayed once again. We were taken in to reception, where Leilani checked us in once more.

"It's so nice to see two of our former guests return," she commented, and I was impressed by her memory of the two of us. Well, Blake maybe not, but since I had just come as the guest of a radio station, I hadn't expected her to remember me at all.

As soon as we got into the villa, Blake and I changed into our swim clothes and went out to the beach. I ran into the water with him, giddy like a little schoolgirl. I had missed the water. I mean sure, New York had rivers, and the ocean was nearby, but it wasn't like this ocean. Pure, warm, turquoise water that you just felt you could stay in forever. This was what the beach was supposed to be like.

We stayed in the water for a while, until both of us realized we were completely starving. Getting fresh seafood at the restaurant, we planned on spending the afternoon tanning by the pool with some drinks, then going out to dinner that night.

To call this place paradise was an understatement. Dinner that night was wonderful, we went to Cay West once again, and this time I had packed appropriately. Then, Blake and I spent the whole night in bed before waking up late in the morning, having brunch by the beach, and then doing a couples trip to the spa. As the ma.s.seuse worked the stress out of my muscles I could practically feel myself melting to the floor.

"So what are we doing tomorrow?" I asked Blake as we strolled along the beach late at night, hand in hand.

"It's a surprise. But I have it all planned out. All you need to know is it involves your bathing suit."

"Ooh, I can't wait," I replied. Everything about this island was perfect. Everything about this weekend was perfect. Blake had even told me he decided we would spend Sunday night at the resort, and fly back early Monday instead of late Sunday as well. Just for me. I loved him so much, and as we made love that night, with him tying me to the headboard as he had that first night, I knew I had found the perfect man.

When I woke up the next day, I was surprisingly excited about the day's adventure, considering I had no idea what it was going to entail.

"Oh man, that ma.s.sage yesterday was perfect," I muttered as I got up out of bed and stretched. I felt so good, so rejuvenated. I could just tell today was going to be amazing.

"It really was," Blake replied as he sat on the edge of the bed. I looked back at his sculpted back and smiled at the fact that I was the only woman on the planet who got to enjoy that body.