Shades Of Submission: Fifty By Fifty Part 85

The first bit of bad news came three weeks after I'd moved. The entire time, I knew that I was going to have to testify against Tom at his trial. The police told me about it, the prosecutor spoke to me about it, and I was ready to do it. I wasn't going to back down. After all, Tom deserved to be punished for what he did to Blake and I.

The call came from my phone in the middle of the day. I recognized the Columbus area code, but not the number.

"h.e.l.lo?"

"Hi, is this Julia Marley?"

"Yes, speaking."

"This is Murray Merzetti from the DA's office in Columbus. It's about the trial involving your ex-boyfriend, Tom Stone."

"Oh, ok, yes?" My heart beat faster in my chest at Tom's name. Was this it? Was there a trial date set?

"Unfortunately, Mr. Stone's lawyer filed a motion to have the charges squashed based on insufficient evidence, and the fact that they didn't think you would come to testify, and the judge approved it."

I wasn't sure I heard right, or understood what the prosecutor said.

"What?" was the only thing that came out of his mouth.

"Tom Stone is free to go, he's being released from jail right now. We drew a judge who is unfortunately, a men's rights activist, and he decided that there wasn't enough evidence, that it was a he-said, she said situation, and that he thought it was unlikely you would come to Columbus to testify?"

"What? That's not true at all, of course I would have come to testify."

"I know you would have. Unfortunately, the judge disagreed. I wish there was something else I could do, but Tom is now a free man. I just thought you should know."

"So what do I do now?"

"You can get a restraining order placed against him. He'll have to obey it, even if he doesn't want to. That is what I would recommend."

"Alright, thanks."

I hung up the phone, feeling numb. Subconsciously, my hand grazed my broken cheekbone, a permanent reminder of the pain Tom had inflicted in me that I was never going to get justice for anymore.

A tear leaked from my eye and rolled down my cheek. I had wanted to testify. I had wanted everyone to know exactly what Tom did to me. He spent years trying to break me down, hurting me, trying to destroy me. I never got the chance to go after him then. I didn't want to, I had just wanted to get away. Now, I was older. I was wiser. I was stronger. I wanted him to pay for what he did to me. And I was never going to get that chance.

I called Blake, but he didn't pick up his phone. I called his a.s.sistant, and was told he was in a meeting and couldn't be disturbed. I was sad, but I understood. I would call back in two hours when his meeting was over, I told her.

Despondent, I grabbed my coat and went to see the only person I knew in New York apart from Blake. Thankfully, Karen was working that day.

"Heyyyyy, how's my favourite New Yorker?" Karen announced happily when I wandered into the store. I was the only customer, which was a good thing, because as soon as I heard her voice I started to cry.

"Oh my G.o.d, honey, what's wrong?" Karen asked, immediately coming over and wrapping me in a big hug.

I told her everything. I had never told anyone, except for Blake and Anna. But none of my friends knew. I had never told a friend what had happened until this moment. I started with Tom and I dating, finished with me leaving him, running away in the middle of the night and going to a motel on the outskirts of town for a few days, hoping he wouldn't find me. With the note I had left behind saying I was moving on. Then with finding him at my apartment that day, and ending with the phone call I'd just had.

"Holy s.h.i.t. I had no idea, Julia. I know I make fun of you for being a small town girl, but girl, I am so impressed with you right now."

"I don't feel impressed with myself. I should have just stayed in Columbus, maybe then I would have been able to testify. I didn't need to move straight away."

"Not a chance. You made the right call. It sounds like the judge was going to be a d.i.c.khead anyway, and besides, you've already wasted enough of your life because of Tom, you had to make the right decision for you, and that was to come to New York."

I smiled at my new friend. "Thanks. When you put it that way, I guess it makes sense."

"So now you need to get your a.s.s to a lawyer's office and get that restraining order done."

"I will. Definitely. I'm just waiting for Blake to get out of a meeting so I can talk to him, I'm sure he knows someone who can file the paperwork for me."

"Good. Don't let yourself get down over this, ok? He got away with it before, and it didn't ruin your life completely. Sure, he's gotten away with it again, but you moved past it the first time. You've moved on, and you're stronger for it. You'll do it again."

"Thanks. I know deep down you're right. But I was looking forward to my day in court, as dumb as that sounds."

"No, I get it. But if cop shows have taught me anything, it's that getting your day in court isn't nearly as awesome as it's made out to be."

"You're a good friend."

"An even better friend would accidentally stick her finger in this red velvet icing so we'd have to share the cupcake," Karen replied, and I laughed as she took out a plate and plastic forks for us to eat with.

When Blake's meeting was scheduled to be over I said goodbye to Karen, promised her we'd go out for drinks after her shift on Friday, then went home to talk to Blake.

As soon as I told him what had happened, he promised he would come home as soon as he could, that he wanted to be there for me in person. I appreciated it, and spent the rest of the afternoon not doing the ch.o.r.es I'd planned, but instead sitting on the couch, watching reruns of Law and Order and thinking about how awful it was that I was never going to get justice for the beating Tom had given me outside my apartment.

Eventually I heard the soft ping of the elevator arriving at our floor, and I immediately rushed into Blake's open, welcoming, warm and comforting arms. There was nothing more in the world I wanted to do than to sob into them, and that's what he let me do.

Blake held me while I drowned my sorrows. When I had finally run out of tears, I explained to him everything that had happened. I told him all about the phone call, how I should get a restraining order, how I really wanted to get justice for what had been done to me.

"Sorry, you must think I'm a blubbering idiot," I finally told him when I was finished. I grabbed a couple tissues and moved over to the couch.

"Of course not. I understand you want justice. Believe me, I want justice for you too. Unfortunately, the universe doesn't always work that way. It sucks, but that's the way it is. And sometimes it's better that way, too."

"No, it's not better that way. Absolutely not. This way they're just letting him back on the streets, leaving him to do the same thing to someone else."

"True. But I only said sometimes, not always. You never know, though. When I was a kid, at school, I got bullied like crazy."

"Seriously?" Blake was so confident, so strong, so powerful a man, I couldn't believe anyone had ever picked on him.

"Yup. Well, I was a geek, after all. A nerd. The perfect person for all the jocks to pick on, even in grade two."

"You're kidding. I never would have guessed."

"I'm not kidding at all. And you know, if it hadn't been for those bullies, I wouldn't be how I am today. I told my mom, when I was ten. She went to my teacher, and the princ.i.p.al, and it only made things worse. They couldn't stop what was happening. It got so bad that I would pretend to be sick just to avoid going to school. My mom couldn't afford to move somewhere else, so I was stuck there. There wasn't a single day that went past that I didn't dream of getting justice. I wished a bigger kid would come and beat them all up. I wished the school roof would collapse and crush them. I dreamed every violent end a kid can possibly dream for my bullies."

"That's horrible, that you had to go through that."

"It was. But you know what? As I got older, that became my motivation. I knew that one day I would be richer than them. I knew I would be more powerful than them. I knew I could crush them."

"And you did, of course."

"I did. Well, I got richer anyway. At that point, I realized that I didn't need to crush them, that my success was enough. I got more out of being bullied by them than I ever realized at the time. Obviously that doesn't apply to everyone, and I still absolutely hate bullies more than anything on the planet, but for me, it actually worked out pretty well."

"But that's the thing, you got your revenge. You're rich, you're powerful, you're better looking than Brad Pitt. I'm not going to get any of that."

"I didn't get my justice overnight, though. It took years. The teasing started when I was eight, and I made my first million when I was 22. That's a long time, but I got there, and I was a better person for it."

"Yeah. Still, I would have loved for him to be in jail now. I'm not very good at that whole patience thing."

"I know. I wish he was in jail too. I wish you could have gotten your day in court. Unfortunately, sometimes the universe just kicks you in the gut."

"It really does. You're right though. I know I'll get past this. I got through it once, I can do it again. At least with a restraining order he won't be able to come near me. I would think it was pointless, but then again, I also never imagined he would come after me when he found out I was in a new relationship. After all, we broke up years ago. I thought he had moved on."

That night, with Blake's arms wrapped around me, I felt safe again. But I still couldn't sleep. I had dreamed about getting my day in court, at pointing at the man who a.s.saulted me when the lawyer asked me, like they do in all those TV shows, at getting to hear a jury p.r.o.nounce him guilty. Now, I wasn't going to get any of that.

I fell asleep thinking about moving on, thinking about continuing my life with the man I loved, and leaving all the bad memories from Columbus behind.

The next day I went with Blake to his office, which I realized I had never seen before. Instead of going up to the 32nd floor, where his office was, we went to the 28th, where apparently the legal department for his company all worked.

I didn't know what I was expecting. After all, the only thing I knew about big tech companies was they were known for having play areas, cool spots to hang out, couches to have naps on, that sort of thing. These were legal offices, however, and they had none of that. There was just a long hallway that went past a bunch of medium sized offices, each with one person inside that had paperwork piled all over their desks. I had briefly considered becoming a lawyer, until I realized my grades were nowhere near good enough for it, and was glad as I saw just how much work they were all doing.

"Wow, you have quite a few lawyers working for you."

"Well, some of them are accountants, too. This is the boring people floor," Blake joked. I noticed that most people were respectful of Blake, they simply nodded at him, no waves, no jokes, nothing.

"This place doesn't seem to have the same tech startup vibe I read about on the internet."

Blake laughed. "No, it definitely doesn't. I'm not the kind of boss that will sit around and shoot the s.h.i.t with my employees. To be honest, I'm pretty sure most of them are scared of me. I like to think I'm firm but fair. I've never fired anyone for something stupid like pouring coffee on their computer by accident or anything like that, but I do expect good work."

I wasn't surprised at all by Blake's remark. It fit with his personality perfectly, and there was no doubt in my mind that "firm but fair" perfectly described how he interacted with his employees. He was a powerful man, but he wasn't the mad with power type.

Eventually we arrived at one of the offices at the end of the hall. Blake knocked on the door, and a man answered "come in". Blake opened it, and when the man, who looked to be around Blake's age, with slightly messy blonde hair and a nice suit looked up, he burst into a grin.

"Heyyyy, Blake. Been a while since you've stooped so low as to come visit us low-level employees in person," he told him, getting up from the desk, coming over and giving Blake a huge bear hug, which my boyfriend returned. When they separated, Blake turned to me.

"You know what I just said about my relationships with my employees? Well, none of that applies to Kevin here. Not only is he the best d.a.m.n lawyer in this place, but he also happens to be my best friend."

Kevin looked over at me.

"So this is the woman who finally managed to tame the lion we all know as Blake Andrews. I'm Kevin, it's great to finally meet you," he told me, holding out a hand, which I happily took. Blake had mentioned his best friend Kevin a couple of times, but I had yet to meet him.

"I had no idea that your friend Kevin worked for you," I told Blake.

"Well, works for is a strong term. I do sign his cheques, and he sometimes does some work for me, but mainly it's an excuse for him to browse Tinder on his phone all day without another boss getting on his a.s.s," Blake replied with a grin, and Kevin burst out laughing.

"It's true. Unfortunately Blake here is too much of a goody two shoes to get into too much trouble, so I usually don't have much to do except boring paperwork, and that's what underlings are for. So what happened? Did you kill a man and hide his body?"

"You know if I did I wouldn't tell you with a third party present."

"Oh that's right, attorney client privilege and all that," Kevin replied with a wink at me. I liked this guy already.

"But seriously," Blake continued, "That a.s.shole that a.s.saulted Julia in Columbus, her ex? He got off and the prosecutor there told her to get a restraining order, so that's why we're here."

"Oh, s.h.i.t. Sorry, Julia," Kevin told me, and I nodded my thanks. "Yeah, we can do that. No problem at all. I haven't filed a restraining order in a while, but I think I remember enough from law school and a couple crazy exes that it shouldn't be a problem. Seriously though, Blake, you can leave Julia and I here, and I'll send her up to you when we're done."

"Thanks, Kev. I knew I could count on you," Blake told him, giving me a quick kiss and heading up to his office.

For around half an hour Kevin took down all the information he needed, printed a form off his computer, got me to sign the bottom, then told me he would give me a call later when he got back from the courthouse.

I thanked him, but he waved it away.

"Don't worry about it. I hate sc.u.mbags like that, that the judge would let him go because he didn't think you would come back to testify is a travesty of justice."

"Well, I appreciate you doing this for me."

"No problem. Now go back up to Blake, it's good you're together, you make him happy, and when he's happy, the employees here are slightly less scared of him."

I laughed as I said goodbye to Kevin and left. I made my way back to the bank of elevators, but instead of going down to the lobby went up to the 32nd floor.

After a quick visit with Blake in his office a perfect, modernist, minimalist look place that still looked like it cost millions to decorate, I made my way back home. I got a call from Kevin that afternoon telling me I now had a restraining order, and that he sent someone in Columbus to serve it to Tom. I thanked him. It did make me feel better to know that Tom was legally not allowed to come within 500 feet of me anymore, that there was a piece of paper out there saying that. I slept a lot better that night, and the nights after.

Two weeks later, however, everything changed. Blake was at work, as usual during the day. I was heading out for a lunch date with Karen. It was going to be a three person date, I had wanted her to meet Blake, and he wanted to meet her, but unfortunately something came up at work and Blake couldn't make it. He had promised to take us out to the best sushi bar in the city to make up for it, however, but we kept our original date anyway.

I was making my way down the street, which was fairly empty for this early in the morning, when suddenly I found a hand on my shoulder. I spun around and found myself face to face with Tom once more.

"What the f.u.c.k? You're not allowed to be within 500 feet of me," I exclaimed. He was breaching the restraining order, I couldn't believe it. The next thing I knew, his arm was across my throat. I couldn't breathe. I started to struggle, but he leaned into my ear and whispered words that terrified me.

"You will stay the f.u.c.k away from that man. You're mine, and no one else's. If you don't, I will come after you both, and I will kill you both. I mean it, b.i.t.c.h. Do not test me."

The next thing I knew, the pressure on my throat was released, and Tom was gone. I looked up and down the street. If anyone had seen what had just happened, they had made themselves scarce.

I immediately started trembling. I was terrified. How had Tom found me? How had he figured out I moved to New York? Obviously they were both pretty easy things to figure out if one cared to look, which Tom obviously did, but it bothered me. It bothered me a lot.

Worse than that was his threats. I wanted to go home. I turned around and ran back to the apartment, then sobbed into the couch.

Reality came down on me like a ton of rocks. Tom had been clear: I had to leave Blake, or he would kill us both. Was he serious? I thought so. I knew Tom well enough to know that he could kill me, or my loved ones. I had absolutely no doubt about it.

From there, I knew what decision I had to make, and it killed me to have to make it. I was going to have to leave Blake. The love of my life, the most perfect man. It wasn't safe. New York wasn't safe. Being with Blake wasn't safe. I didn't care so much about my safety, but I did care about his. It wasn't right for me to put him in that kind of danger, it wasn't fair to him. This was my battle, and unfortunately, right now my best option was running away.

As I wrote a letter explaining everything to Blake, tears fell from my eyes. I couldn't let myself think about the future, couldn't let myself imagine a life without Blake. After all, even though we had only known each other for a few months, I was truly, deeply in love with him. And I thought we were going to be together forever. Little did I know forever was only going to last a few weeks.

I cursed everything about Tom. Cursed the fact that he ever entered my life as I packed a duffel bag with the most essential clothes I owned. I was going to have to start over, from scratch. I couldn't go back to Columbus. Wouldn't go back to Columbus. Blake would find me, and he would want me to come back. No, I had to go completely anonymous, somewhere no one could find me. Not Blake, and more importantly, not Tom. I would let Blake go, but I absolutely would not go back to him, not under any circ.u.mstances.

Trying to stem the flow of tears, I took the elevator down one last time to the lobby. I made my way the couple of blocks to the Subway, and took the train to Penn Station. There I found a train leaving for Philadelphia ten minutes later, and I quickly bought a ticket and made my way to my seat. Thankfully, almost the entire car was empty. I didn't want any strangers prying into the lonely looking woman bawling her eyes out.

As the train pulled away from the station, I wondered if I made the right choice. I knew I had, really. There was nothing else I could do. I loved Blake so much that I had to let him go, for his own good. I wasn't going to be responsible for him becoming the victim of one of Tom's crazy attacks. I couldn't let that happen to Blake.

I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my breathing, in and out, to make sure that I didn't completely hyperventilate and panic on the train ride. I knew I was making the right call. It was absolutely destroying me, but it was what I needed to do. I couldn't let Blake be in danger because of me. I just couldn't.

Heartbroken, the train finally arrived in Philly, and I booked into a hostel for a few days with some of the cash I'd taken with me. I was going to have to create a whole new ident.i.ty. I didn't think it was safe to be Julia Marley anymore. After all, if Tom could find me in New York with that name, surely he could find me in Philadelphia too. And so could Blake.