Pegasus: A Novel Part 4

"Germany," Lucas answered, and she nodded. There were lots of Germans in the circus, and she knew many of them.

"I'm Czech, but I've been here since I was two. I speak Czech and German too," she said matter-of-factly, and began speaking to him in German. Lucas looked relieved, and thrilled to have found a friend he could speak to freely, without struggling for words. "I'm Rosie, and my mama dances on the high wire, without a net sometimes. She made my dress," she went on in German. He thought she had a funny accent, but she spoke it well. "My papa is Czech too. He's on the trapeze, and he can do a triple. Sometimes he does the high wire with my mama. He doesn't like it when she doesn't use a net, but everyone applauds more when she doesn't. What does your papa do?" She glanced shyly at Nick, and he smiled. She was an adorable child, from a typical circus family. And to her, it all seemed normal. It was the only life she knew. To Lucas, it was all new and exciting, far more so than his six quiet years growing up in Bavaria, in the country.

"My papa rides horses, and my brother will help him. We just got here today."

"I know. My mama said to leave you alone until you settled in. My sister thinks your brother is handsome. She saw him when you arrived." Lucas thought it was interesting information, as Nick realized that his sons would be part of the large group of circus children now, and these would be their friends.

"My brother is fifteen, and I'm six," Lucas volunteered.

"Me too," Rosie said, and when she smiled, Lucas could see that she had recently lost her front teeth. He thought it made her look cute, and so did Nick. She was wearing pink ballet slippers with her dress. She usually did. She didn't need to wear other shoes here, only when she went to school.

As they chatted, Nick went inside to find Toby and remind him about rehearsal the next day, and tell him the president of the circus would be there to see their act. And when he found him, Toby was listening to the radio, and he looked up at his father with a glazed expression.

"Something wrong?" Nick asked, instantly worried. Toby looked like he'd seen a ghost.

"There were attacks all over Germany two days ago. They burned synagogues and businesses and people's homes. They took people away. They said that they were ridding Germany of the criminal element, but it sounds like it was all Jews. They said on the report that thirty thousand Jewish men were put in prison, and several thousand women, in Germany and Austria. They called it *Kristallnacht.' It happened the day before we got off the ship. Would that have been us, Papa, if we were still there?" Toby looked terrified at the thought, and sad for the people who had been hurt and put in jail. They had been isolated from the news while they traveled. Nick had heard something about it on the ship, but he thought it was just another bout of violence after one of Hitler's rallies. He had no idea that the persecution of Jews had taken such ma.s.sive proportions, and was so out of control. He realized then that was probably why General von Messing told them to leave immediately. He knew what was coming and tried to warn. Kristallnacht was no random roundup. It had been planned.

"I'm glad we didn't have to find out. Hopefully that wouldn't have been us if we were there, but it could have been. The country is in a sad state, and Hitler is a very dangerous man." Nick was relieved for the boys and his father that they had left. If he had stayed, they might have punished Paul for harboring them, and Nick could have been taken to jail, and even Toby. And now that they were gone, Paul was safe, and so were they. It seemed as though no one was secure in Germany now, not only the Jews, but anyone related to them, even by marriage, involved with them in any way, or doing business with them. Any Jew or person protecting a Jew was in danger. Kristallnacht had been a night of incredible violence that shocked the world.

Nick was suddenly even more grateful to be here, and knew he had done the right thing. His father was right. He was determined now to give the best possible performance he could, so they would offer him a contract and he could stay. Nothing was sure yet, until North approved their performance the next morning. He tried to get Toby to focus on that, in order to get his mind off what he'd heard on the radio. And he told him exactly which tricks he wanted to do. He was going to try and get Pluto to do all his most spectacular feats, and he wanted Toby riding around the ring on one of the Arabians both at the beginning and the end of the act. He didn't have to do anything more than that. For most of the act, Nick would be using liberty commands, and standing in the center of the ring in his top hat and tails. Toby would be wearing tails too.

After a sleepless night in the unfamiliar surroundings, the two men looked very elegant the next morning when they set out for the tent where they were keeping their horses. Lucas went with them, to help them lead the horses to the main tent. And Nick had found two handlers to a.s.sist him. The three men and Toby each took two horses. Nick led the two Lipizzaners, and Toby and the two handlers each led two Arabians, while Lucas walked along and told his brother that he had heard about a girl who liked him.

"Oh really?" Toby said skeptically. He hadn't met nearly as many people as Lucas in a single day. But his brother was irrepressibly gregarious, and he was far more reserved. The only girl he wasn't shy with was Marianne at home. He had written her a letter the night before, about the ship and their arrival at the circus, and he had posted it that morning. He told her how much he missed her and how strange everything was here, and how much he missed his grandfather and her father, and their home. "What's her name?" Toby asked about the girl Lucas had mentioned. He looked older than his years in the top hat and tailcoat, and very handsome. And Nick looked incredibly dashing as he led the two Lipizzaners toward the main tent. Several of the women's heads turned as he pa.s.sed them, but he was oblivious as he worried about the act he was about to do for such an important man, with so much resting on his performance, their lives and his job.

"I don't know her name," Lucas said about his brother's admirer. "Her sister told me. Her name is Rosie and she's six. She's from Czechoslovakia, but she speaks German like us, pretty good too. I'll bet her sister does too." It was a definite plus in Lucas's mind, and he thought it might be to Toby too. He could see how quiet he was, and was trying to cheer up his older brother. But Toby was nervous about their performance too. He could see that his father was tense.

The handlers helped them tether their horses to a pole when they got into the huge tent. A trapeze act was just finishing its rehearsal, and Lucas wondered if it was Rosie's father, but he heard them speaking Spanish when they left, so he knew it couldn't be him. And he thought they were amazing as he watched them.

Another group came in after them, and Nick heard them speak Polish. A young woman emerged from the group and did a low-wire act, which she practiced quietly, doing a ballet on the wire, as a man in a wheelchair watched, and corrected her and told her what to do. As Nick glanced at her, he saw that she had the face of an angel, and the body of a fairy as she leaped into the air and then found her footing instantly on the wire. He was mesmerized by her, and she never raised her eyes. She just concentrated on what she was doing, and listened to the man in the wheelchair's commands. Nick thought he had never seen anything as graceful, and she looked like barely more than a child, she was so small, but she had a womanly grace about her. He thought she might be in her late teens. And then he turned his attention to the horses, and spoke to Pluto in a low voice.

"You know this is important, right? We won't get the contract if you miss the capriole or the croupade. I'm depending on you. This is just as important as the night you got back on your legs again on the ship." The big horse nodded his head as though he understood. And then Nick spoke to Nina, who was looking sleepy, and gave her a similar speech. The Lipizzaners were decked out in their finest bridles and saddles without stirrups and looked as elegant as their riders. The Arabians were already prancing, in need of exercise, and didn't seem skittish as Toby rode them one by one around the ring. And he looked comfortable riding them too. Like his father, he had been watching the girl on the low wire, being commanded by the man in the wheelchair, but once he started to warm up the horses, he forgot about her. Then Nick rode Pluto several times around the ring. The horse seemed ecstatic to be ridden again, and Nick felt as though he and Pluto had bonded on the ship when he was sick. Ever since, Pluto seemed to heed his every command and do whatever he could to please him.

Nick rode Nina after that, to warm her up, and then Toby got astride her when Nick dismounted. They had given themselves an hour to loosen them up. And by ten o'clock Nick knew they were ready. And just as he thought it, John Ringling North appeared, crossed the ring to where Nick was standing, and shook his hand. Nick didn't know it, but North had never done that before. It was a sign of respect, and then he discreetly took a seat in the stands, at a good vantage point to watch Nick and his horses perform.

Lucas put a recording of Mozart on a phonograph they had plugged into a light pole next to the ring. And their act began with Nick galloping elegantly around the ring on Pluto, going ever faster, and ending with the spectacular white Lipizzaner doing a levade, where he stood on his hind legs and held the stance for a seemingly endless time. The beautiful horse had never done it more smoothly or better, and then he hopped easily into the courbette, where he moved forward in little jumps. Then Nick galloped with him again, as Toby joined him on Nina. The two Lipizzaners looked like poetry in motion, as they moved with infinite precision through their ballet, mirroring each other's movements perfectly around the ring. Nick dismounted just as Toby did, and they left the ring, leaving both horses standing side by side, as Nick began the liberty commands. They executed each movement and exercise with flawless precision, doing exactly what Nick wanted. They didn't let him down. And after half an hour of impeccable exercises, Nick got onto Pluto's saddle again and led him into the challenging capriole, where the splendid horse kicked his hind legs out in midair, and then transitioned instantly into the croupade, where Pluto literally flew through the air, with all four legs tucked under his body, as though the powerful beast were weightless, and he landed as gracefully as he had left the ground.

The people who had watched him, handlers and a handful of acrobats, gasped when they saw it. Pluto had been exquisite, and Nick looked like the most elegant rider in the world astride him. The performance had been perfect, and Pluto took a bow, as Nick sat erect and took off his top hat in the direction of John Ringling North, and then Nick and Pluto left the ring, and he dismounted. It had been a grueling performance for rider and mount, but Nick knew that neither of them could have done it any better. It had been the best that Pluto had ever given, and Nina had done extremely well too.

As Nick stood there, breathless with excitement after his performance, stroking Pluto, John Ringling North left the stands, and came to where Nick was standing. North was wearing jodhpurs and riding boots and carrying a crop with a silver handle, and he was beaming.

"They're the most beautiful sight I've ever seen. And perfectly trained. They're as good as the Lipizzaners I saw at the Spanish Riding School in Vienna. Welcome to Ringling Brothers, Mr. Bing." He smiled broadly at him and held out his hand, and shook Nick's. He turned to look at Pluto then, barely winded by what he'd done. He was powerful and young. "He really does fly, doesn't he?" And then he turned to Nick again. "That's it. That's his name. Pegasus, the flying horse of Greek legend. And Athena," he said, glancing at Nina. "You have your act, Nick. They're perfect. Welcome to the Greatest Show on Earth. You're worthy of the name." And with that, he took an envelope out of his pocket and handed it to Nick. "I've already signed it. You do the same, and drop it off at my office. I want you in the center ring as our second act after the tigers, in the first performance after the winter break. You'll open in Madison Square Garden."

And then he turned to Toby with a warm smile. "Good work, son. You looked great," he said, and Toby beamed. There were tears in Nick's eyes when John North left. They were safe, they were home, he had a job. And Pegasus and Athena had been born. He smiled as he turned to Pluto and tried out the new name. The horse whinnied as though he were laughing, but didn't seem to mind.

"Thank you," Nick whispered, as he stroked his head. "Thank you, Pegasus, for taking care of us. I won't let you down. Sorry about the new name." But the newly renamed Pegasus just tossed his head and whinnied again, as though he approved. And as Nick turned to lead him from the ring, he saw the elfin girl from the low wire standing beside a post, half hidden, where she had been watching him perform. She had enormous vibrant blue eyes, like his own, and a halo of pale blond hair. Her eyes met his for a minute, but she didn't smile, she just stared at him, as she had at the astounding horse, and then she seemed to float off and disappear, and she was gone. She was like a vision, as though he had imagined her and not really seen her, a benevolent spirit that was observing him.

"Pretty girl," Nick said casually to one of the handlers who was helping them get the horses back to their tent, to cover the fact that he had been staring at her as intently as she had watched him.

"She's a Markovich," the handler said with a shrug, as though that would explain everything to Nick, but it didn't. He knew nothing of circus lore, or the names of the performers, except for the few Lucas had met. "They're Polish. They're all crazy. High wire. Without a net. Her father's in a wheelchair. He killed her mother that way-she was a beautiful girl. They'll kill her too. She was just practicing on the low wire today. She works up there," he said, pointing to the top of the tent. "The crowds love it. I think it's a terrible thing to do to a young girl. He doesn't care," he said about her father. "He does it to thrill the crowd. And if she winds up in a wheelchair like him, or dead like her mother, he thinks it's fine. She has four brothers who do the act with her. Her aunt's in a wheelchair too. I can't watch them. They make me sick," he said as they left the tent.

"What's her name?" Nick asked, intrigued by what the handler had said.

"Christianna. Christianna Markovich. She's the grand finale, the last act before the parade at the end. It keeps people in their seats till the end of the show, waiting to see if she'll fall and die." The way he described it sounded grim to Nick.

"She looks like a child." She appeared to be about fifteen when he saw her at close range.

"She's older than she looks. She's twenty-one. She's been in the circus since she was born. They're one of the oldest circus families here. There's another high-wire act that's been here for four years. Czechs. Big rivalry between them. The others work with a net most of the time, so the Markoviches treat them like dirt," he said with a grin.

Nick was beginning to learn about the circus and the people he now lived with, the intrigues between them, the jealousies and the dangers, but he had been struck by the ethereal-looking girl he had seen practicing, commanded by what must have been her father. Her eyes had electrified him, and then she had disappeared. He wondered when he'd see her again, and if he'd have the courage to see her act. It horrified him to think that she worked without a net and might fall. And even more so to think that her own father was willing to take that risk.

He and Toby fed and watered the horses, and Lucas helped them, after the handlers left. He had been excited to see his brother and father performing, and even more so when one of the handlers had taken him to see the elephants afterward, and he got to sit on one of them. His new life was full of thrills and wonders for him. And as they walked back to their trailer, still in top hat and tails, Nick felt suddenly more at ease, among the odd people walking past them. Several of them smiled at Nick and the boys, and Lucas waved at the dwarf he knew, who was standing with a group of his friends in the distance. It wasn't a bad place to have landed after all, just very different. Rosie was sitting on their front step, waiting for Lucas when they got home.

"Where've you been?" she asked him, in English this time.

"My father and brother had to work," he explained in German, and she nodded, and Nick noticed then that she had brought an older girl with her, who was obviously her sister. She gazed at Toby adoringly as he blushed beet red. He looked very handsome in his top hat and tails.

"This is my sister Katja," Rosie said, lapsing into German, as Toby tried to look nonchalant and couldn't pull it off. He looked mesmerized by the beautiful girl Rosie had brought with her. She was wearing a simple blue dress, she had dark hair, long graceful legs, and looked like a young ballerina. When Toby started talking to her in German, her face lit up. It was an international community of dozens of nationalities living together, a microcosm of the world.

Nick invited the sisters to join them at the mess tent for lunch a little while later, and the girls went to ask their parents and then returned and said they could. They were very well behaved and very polite to Nick as the five of them chatted in German on their way to eat. Katja was fifteen, like Toby, and they had only been with Ringling Brothers for four years, since she was eleven, she said, so her English wasn't as good as her little sister's, who had spoken it since she was two. They had been with a circus in Czechoslovakia and one in Germany before that, until scouts found them and brought them over to the States. Katja said she liked it very much, better here than at their old circus in Europe, and Rosie didn't know any life other than this.

"They're very nice to us here," Katja said to Toby, and he was fascinated by her. She was a very pretty girl. She told them her father was training her on the trapeze. Their family were the Markoviches' archrivals, Nick realized as he listened, and the girls' mother was the other high-wire act, but she usually used a net in her act, unlike the Markoviches, who never did. Nick realized he had a lot to learn about the intricacies of the circus, what these people did, the risks they took, and how they lived.

He slipped away from lunch for a few minutes to drop off the contract he had signed. He left it at John Ringling North's office, with one of his secretaries. He was one of them now. He had been reborn. He even had a new name. Nick Bing. And so did Pluto. He was Pegasus, the flying horse, and he was worthy of the name. Their new life had begun that day.

Chapter 9.

"I had a letter from Toby today," Marianne said to her father mournfully, three weeks after they had seen them off at the ship, and her father looked at her in surprise. Germany and all of Europe were still reverberating with the stories of the destruction on Kristallnacht, and the people who had disappeared, all of them Jewish. It had proven to Alex and Paul how wise they had been to urge Nick to leave quickly. They were both relieved to know that he and the boys were safely in Florida now. They had nothing to fear there.

"Already?" Alex answered her. "He must have written to you the moment he arrived. I had a telegram from his father when they landed in New York, to tell me the horses were all right, but I haven't heard from him since. How are they?"

"Toby sounds sad. It was the day they got to Florida, and he said everything there is very strange."

"Well, life in the circus certainly isn't familiar to any of them, but at least they're safe. Being in a circus in Germany would seem strange to him too."

"I suppose so. He said they're living in a trailer smaller than our boxcar for the horses. It must be very hard." Marianne sounded sorry for him, and Alex nodded. He was sure it was difficult, but less so than a labor camp, and he was grateful they were safe, particularly after Kristallnacht had stunned the entire world.

Alex went to see Nick's father the next day. Paul had been sick for the past two weeks, and looked as though he had aged twenty years since Nick and the boys left. His solitude now was hard on him, with no hope of seeing his son and grandsons anytime in the near future, if ever again. The turmoil in Germany appeared to be increasing, and certainly not diminishing. Paul had a bad cough, and Alex thought he looked feverish and said he should call the doctor. But Paul insisted he was fine. He didn't look it, but Alex didn't want to make a fuss, or send the doctor to him against his will.

"Marianne had a letter from Toby," he said before he left, hoping to cheer him up with news of the boys, but Paul just looked sadder, and hearing about them made him miss them more.

"Are they all right?" he asked, and Alex nodded, and didn't want to tell him they were sad, or at least Toby had been when he wrote.

"They're fine. He wrote it the day they got to Florida, so they hadn't settled in yet. It's all very new to them. They'll adjust." Paul nodded, and thanked Alex for the visit when he left. The house felt so empty to him now, whenever he went to the main schloss. It echoed and seemed ghostly without his son and the boys. It was a lonely life for him now.

Alex was equally sad without his friend. Marianne wrote to Toby now every day, with news from home, however little there was. She didn't tell him that Kristallnacht had frightened everyone. It had been so violent, and so many people had gotten hurt, been put in jail, or simply disappeared. She was happy to be in the countryside, where none of the chaos and turmoil in the cities affected them. She did mention that her father had decided not to give their Christmas ball that year. It was only a month away, but with so much disruption in Germany, and people being taken away and losing their homes in the cities, he had decided that it seemed wrong to give a ball. And without his friend Nick to share the festivities with him, he said it wouldn't have been fun anyway, and Marianne agreed. She wasn't in the mood either. Nick and the boys moving away, and so suddenly, felt like a huge loss to all of them. And the winter seemed cold and dark. It felt like a time for mourning, not joy.

She told Toby that she had gone hunting with her father, but even that hadn't been enjoyable, and like a bad omen, the fox had gotten away. She told him, too, that the little Lipizzaner foal was growing, and loved to run now, and he was still coal black as he would be for several years. And they were expecting another one soon. She said that she hoped that Pluto and Nina and the other horses were doing well. She told him whatever she could of her daily doings, which seemed very dull to her now. She didn't tell him that her father seemed sad, and so was she, that life without her friend Toby and his little brother seemed empty to her. They had seen each other almost every day since they were born. And the days were so lonely now without him.

When Marianne got Toby's letter, it was the day before Thanksgiving in America, and by then Nick and the boys had been in Florida for almost two weeks. Nick had been a.s.signed a rehearsal schedule, to develop his act, in one of the rings in the huge tent, and he was practicing there every day, with Toby most of the time. Sometimes he just went there with Pluto and Nina-Pegasus and Athena now, he was getting used to their new names. He was practicing their liberty commands and the precision training, and he was learning a great deal every day. And Toby's skills were improving too. The Arabians were easier to work with, although less interesting to watch.

Nick hadn't run into Christianna Markovich again. She was obviously practicing at a different time, and he hadn't thought of her since his performance for Mr. North. Thanks to Lucas, he was meeting many new people, Eastern Europeans, and Germans, and some French. Through Pierre, Lucas had met many of the clowns, and brought some of them back to the trailer to meet his father and brother, and he always had fun with them. He had finally met the tattooed lady and was thrilled. And he and his little friend Rosie had become inseparable, and whenever possible, got up to mischief together. They played marbles and hopscotch, hide-and-seek among the trailers, and all the games other children did around the world, and they visited the elephants and got a ride on them whenever possible. They went to watch a new contortionist, and Lucas wanted to learn to walk on stilts, and Pierre the clown showed him how. He brought him a small pair, and Lucas practiced with them every night. All he wanted to do was use them to perform during intermission with the clowns. Nick tried not to comment on it, because this was the world they lived in now, but the prospect of his son becoming a clown one day didn't sound like a worthy goal to him. But like it or not, they were circus performers, just like everyone else there. Nick tried to accept it as their destiny for the time being, although it was hard to imagine being there forever.

Nick finally met Rosie and Katja's mother one afternoon when she came to pick up the girls at Nick's trailer. She was wearing a leotard and a tutu, and had just come from rehearsal herself.

"Thank you for being so kind to my girls," she said with a warm smile. Her name was Gallina. She was a strikingly pretty woman, as lovely as her daughters, and she moved with agile grace and had a lithe athletic body.

"They're beautifully behaved and lovely girls," he said kindly, and meant it. He liked them both, as did his boys.

She and Nick chatted for a few minutes, and he noticed that despite her Czech accent, she was well spoken when she spoke German, as though she had been properly educated when she was young. He was curious about them. She explained that she was from Prague, and her father had sent her to boarding school in Germany as a child, while her parents traveled with the circus. She had only come back to them at fourteen, and she had insisted on training for the high wire, despite their protests. Her parents had been gymnasts and trapeze artists, not a high-wire act like the Markoviches, and she had eventually married the girls' father, Sergei, whose family was famous for their work on the trapeze. Nick was beginning to understand that there was a real hierarchy in the circus, a kind of n.o.bility, depending on which acts they performed, where they came from, and how long they'd done it. Her husband's family was Czech too. He had five brothers who had come to Ringling Brothers with him, and his parents had since retired. They stayed in Czechoslovakia, as had her own, and her brother and sister were still working with her parents, as gymnasts in a German circus.

She smiled as she looked at Nick. She had spent enough time in Germany that she was entirely aware of how aristocratic he was, and how little he belonged here. And she was touched by how courteous he was to her. She had seen him work with his horses and knew just how good he was. Several of the performers had been talking about him and his exquisite Lipizzaners since he arrived.

"I don't need to ask you what circus you came from," she said, smiling shyly at him. She had heard through the grapevine that he was a count, and it didn't surprise her. "Why did you come to the circus?"

"Political problems at home," he said simply, and she didn't ask him for further information. She already knew from Lucas that Nick's wife had died, and Toby's younger sister, who would have been nine by then. Gallina felt sorry for them. This was a strange place for them to land, and she wondered how long they'd stay. She wondered if he'd lost his money, and all he knew how to do was train horses and ride, which was painfully close to the truth. But she knew for a certainty that he was many, many social strata above them, but he never let her feel it, he was courteous and gentlemanly, and always kind to her girls.

"I came over to ask you if you'd like to join us for Thanksgiving," she said warmly. "It's an important family holiday here. We make turkey, and dumplings of course, and traditional Czech dishes. It's our version of Thanksgiving." She laughed. "We're hoping that you and the boys will come."

"I'd like that very much," he said graciously. "May I bring something? I'm not much of a cook, but I could bring dessert." He knew he could go to a bakery in town and buy some pies. He had been told that pumpkin and apple pies were traditional for Thanksgiving.

"No, my sisters-in-law do most of the cooking. I'm not much of a cook either. But it's your first Thanksgiving here, and we didn't want you to be alone. Besides, my Katja is crazy about your Toby." He had noticed it-it would have been impossible not to. And Toby was rapidly becoming equally crazy about her. They were smitten. "He's a good boy," she added, and Nick was touched. "And Lucas is a little monster, and we love him." They both laughed at that. Lucas had friends now all over the fairgrounds, and Nick wouldn't have been surprised if he had met each of the thirteen hundred performers at least once. He seemed to have friends everywhere they went, and he knew everything about them, what they did, and where they came from. And his English was improving by leaps and bounds. "He wants my brothers-in-law to teach him how to juggle."

"That should be interesting." Nick laughed at the idea. "Preferably on stilts, I imagine. He's been working on that diligently since we got here." As he said it, Lucas came down the road on his short stilts with Pierre, who was showing him how to keep his balance. Rosie was walking along beside him, looking as adorable as always and holding one of his hands while Pierre held the other. And Toby and Katja were following behind on a tandem bicycle they had borrowed from someone. "Speak of the devils," Nick said, as the ragtag group approached the trailer, and saw their parents talking.

"Are we in trouble?" Lucas inquired with an unconcerned glance at his father. If so, it wouldn't have been unfamiliar to him. Nick had scolded him several times for disappearing. Nick wanted to know where he was at all times, just as Gallina did with her girls. They both had fairly stern European values and rules for their children. Others were more haphazard and less vigilant with their kids.

"No, you're not in trouble for a change," Nick rea.s.sured Lucas. "Rosie and Katja's mother was kind enough to invite us for Thanksgiving." As he said it, all four children gave a cheer. "I think that's a vote of approval," he said, smiling at Gallina.

"Well, see you tomorrow then," she said, rounding up her girls to take them home for dinner. "Come at four o'clock. We'll have dinner at six." Nick thanked her again, and after she left, he went to a nearby liquor store and bought two bottles of decent wine. He didn't want to show up the next day empty-handed. He was grateful for the invitation, and talked to the boys about their new friends that night, as they ate dinner at the trailer's tiny dining table that was barely big enough for two men and a boy. Most of the time they were b.u.mping into each other in the narrow, confined s.p.a.ce.

"Gallina and her husband fight a lot," Toby filled him in, over the chicken Nick had cooked in the tiny oven. Nick was learning to cook as well as everything else. For the first time in his life, he was doing their laundry and making his own bed, and he had borrowed a vacuum cleaner from one of their neighbors to clean the trailer. "Sergei doesn't like her doing the high wire. He wants her to do the trapeze with him and Rosie's uncles, and she doesn't want to. She thinks it's too tame, even when they do a triple, which is really hard. But they use a net. I watched them do it," Toby said, as though it were commonplace to know people who could do that. A month before, he wouldn't even have known what a "triple" was. Now he was explaining it to his father. "It's a triple somersault in the air on a trapeze. He told her to go live with the Markoviches, if she wants to be crazy. They don't use a net."

"So I've been told," Nick said quietly. Some of the gossip was familiar to him now, and he knew the names of the star performers of the big acts. He had recently talked to the trainer of the big cats, who was an interesting person, had lived in Africa for many years, and was also German. It was an extraordinarily varied group of people, from all social cla.s.ses and educational backgrounds. Some had had considerable schooling. He had talked to a man from another horse act and was intrigued to discover that he'd gone to law school but preferred the circus. Others looked as though they had come from some very dark places to join the circus. There was a huge sampling of humanity, with all kinds of people, even though they seemed strange to him at first. But the newness of it was starting to wear off. And the invitation to Thanksgiving dinner with Gallina and her family had touched him. He was intrigued to meet her husband and his brothers. He missed male companionship without Alex and his father.

Gallina and Sergei and his brothers and their wives turned out to be very friendly, kind people, when Nick and the boys went there for dinner. They had seven or eight children between them, mostly boys, all of whom were expected to eventually join the trapeze troupe, and some of whom already had, in their teens. And Nick liked Sergei a great deal. He had a good sense of humor, and immediately stashed one of the bottles of wine Nick brought, and said it would be wasted on his brothers. They drank the other one, along with several other bottles, at dinner. But they were a wholesome crowd, who loved their families and had fun with their wives, and Nick and his children had a terrific time at their first Thanksgiving dinner.

Toby and Katja went outside immediately afterward, and sat in the warm night air, talking about the things that mattered to them. Katja confessed to Toby that she wanted to leave the circus one day and have a normal life and a home and not live in a trailer, which seemed reasonable to him. She said her parents would be very upset if she said it to them. They thought this was the best life in the world, and Katja didn't. She wanted more.

"What about you?" she asked Toby with her big blue eyes, and he thought about it for a minute before he answered.

"I don't know. I don't know what I want to do, except go back to Germany one day." Just saying it made him miss his grandfather again, and Marianne and all his friends.

"I want to stay here," Katja added, "in America, not Florida. I liked New York when we went there. It's always great at Madison Square Garden when we start the season." Her eyes lit up as she said it. "I don't want to go back to Prague, it was boring. I think my mother misses it, but I don't. It's better here." Toby didn't know if that was true yet. He hadn't been there long enough to decide. All he did know was that he liked her a lot, and after they talked for a while, he kissed her. He didn't tell her, but she was the first girl he had ever kissed, and his head was swimming when they stopped. And so was hers. He kissed her again then, and they were better at it. It seemed to be something one had to learn. And they were both more than willing to apply themselves to it. They were still working on it when Lucas came around the trailer, saw them kissing, and stopped dead in his tracks, and then giggled and disappeared. He went to tell Rosie what he'd seen.

"How stupid," Rosie said with a disgusted look. "My father will be mad if he finds out. Katja's not allowed to kiss boys. He doesn't want her acting like *some little tart in the circus,' whatever that means. He tells her that all the time."

"I think they like each other a lot," Lucas confided, and Rosie agreed. "I don't think we should tell." She made him pinkie-swear not to then, which she said was something she had learned at school. They went to school in Florida in the winter, but the rest of the time, on tour, they were tutored, which she liked better. The teachers at the circus didn't give as much homework, but sometimes her mother did instead. She wanted her to get a good education, which Rosie thought was boring.

When Nick and the boys went home that night, everyone looked sated and happy. Nick had had several gla.s.ses of wine, and had relaxed for the first time in a long time. He had played chess with Sergei and won, and enjoyed talking to his brothers. They had all spoken German to him and his boys, and Czech among themselves, and the children had spoken English to each other. It had been a wonderful family evening, and Nick had been touched to be included. He felt as though he had friends there now, and Sergei wanted to come and watch Nick work with his horses. He wanted to see Pegasus do his croupade, which several people had told him was amazing and hard to believe, and made Pegasus look like he was flying. People were beginning to know him by name now, by his new name, not the old one.

"They're good people," Nick said to Toby and Lucas as they walked into the trailer, which didn't look quite as bleak now, knowing they had friends nearby. Toby had stars in his eyes and only nodded, and Lucas giggled as they went to get ready for bed. He didn't tell Toby he'd seen him kissing Katja. Toby was totally besotted as he brushed his teeth, put on his pajamas, and went to bed. He was in love. And Lucas wandered into his father's room to kiss him goodnight. Nick was on his bed writing a letter to his father to tell him about his first Thanksgiving. It was so different from anything Paul knew. An evening with six men who performed a trapeze act, and their wives who were gymnasts, and Gallina on the high wire. It was hard to find the words to describe everything, but it had been a perfect evening in his brand-new life.

"Goodnight, Papa," Lucas said, brushing his cheek with a kiss. "Maybe I'll be a trapeze artist one day, instead of a clown," he mumbled with a yawn and shuffled off to bed, as though those were his only two options, as his father mused about how strange life was, how rapidly things changed, and wondered what would happen to them all. If only he knew. But for now, this was enough. It was a safe refuge from the storm brewing in Europe.

Chapter 10.

The circus did a Christmas show every year in Sarasota, for the locals, and to try out some of their new acts. They wanted Nick in the show, and advertised it heavily: the Count, with the flying horses Pegasus and Athena. They had a photographer take some impressive photographs of Pegasus in midair during a croupade, and Nick cut a dashing figure in top hat and tails astride him. And when he did his act in the show, the audience went wild and loved him. He was in the parade at the end, riding Pegasus, and Toby on Athena, waving their top hats at the crowd. He was a new face, and both women and men seemed to be excited by him. The women liked his striking good looks, he was a very handsome man, and the men admired what he did with his horses. The introduction of his act was a resounding success, much to the delight of John Ringling North, who had come to watch him from a seat in the front row, and even he thought Nick's act was perfection. And several of the other performers had come, too, and all congratulated Nick when he went backstage after his performance.

Nick was hanging around afterward, waiting for the parade, when he heard the ringmaster announce the Markovich family in the main ring as the last act after the intermission, and Nick wandered out, to stand at the edge of the ring to watch Christianna. He had seen her practice on the low wire a few times, with her father coaching her, but he had never seen her perform on the high wire. He was curious, and stood silently as she shimmied gracefully up the rope to the tiny platform near the top of the tent, as the crowd watched without uttering a sound. The band was playing the music from Swan Lake, which Nick recognized instantly, but he paid no attention to it, as he watched her move with infinite grace from the platform onto the wire.

And instinctively he lowered his eyes to see what was below her. There were handlers, and her father in his wheelchair, and her brothers watching her closely, standing below the high wire, in case they had to catch her. But there was no net, and as he saw it, Nick held his breath and kept his eyes glued to her. He was mesmerized by the tiny waiflike figure who seemed to glide through the air, standing on nothing. She was up so high that it was hard to see the wire beneath her feet. She looked as though she were suspended in midair, dancing, and she smiled as she did it, as though she loved what she was doing.

The wire bounced once, and the entire crowd gasped, but she maintained her footing effortlessly. She turned backward then, and forward again, and as he looked, Nick started to feel sick. He couldn't bear the suspense and the tension as he stared at her while she took such terrifying risks. It was easy to see why she was the star of the show. She deserved every bit of it for what she was doing. Her performance seemed interminable as the tension mounted, and Nick felt chilled as he continued to watch her.

And then finally, with a last graceful leap, she landed on the platform on the other side, barely bigger than her tiny feet, and the audience burst into thunderous applause. She grasped a loop in the rope and slid effortlessly down until she landed on the circus floor and took an elegant bow. The crowd got to their feet immediately and cheered her. She had risked her life for them, and they considered it entertainment, and as he stood there afterward, Nick realized he was shaking. He had never seen anything so terrifying in his life.

She whisked past him as she left the ring, but didn't see him, and her brothers followed like a palace guard, with her father wheeling his chair behind them. He had once been as good as his daughter and notoriously more daring, and her mother had been as graceful, everyone agreed, until she fell to her death. Nick couldn't imagine anything being worth taking that kind of risk. He had watched Gallina perform earlier, and she had been far more cautious. Her act was exciting, but nothing like this. Christianna's performance was a combination of exquisite grace and agility, remarkable balance, and sheer terror. And she was much too young and beautiful to die. Her mother had been scarcely older when she lost her life, when Christianna was very young. She had been brought up by her father and aunt, Nick had been told.

He was still shaken when he mounted Pegasus a few minutes later for the parade. Christianna had been the grand finale, and deservedly so. And then the parade lightened the mood again, with every performer in it, all the animals, the stars of the show riding elephants, and Christianna among them, while the clowns cavorted around them, and the music celebrated the close of the show. There had been no mishaps, but Nick had felt as though his heart would stop as he watched Christianna. Pegasus pranced past her at one point in the parade, as she rode the largest elephant, standing on his back, and she looked at Nick. Their eyes met, and he saluted her with his top hat, and then she smiled. She looked as light as air as she danced along beside him for a moment, and then he led Pegasus into a slow canter and moved ahead. Nick realized there was something riveting about her every time he saw her. He didn't know if it was the shocking risks she took with her own life, or her sheer beauty. But either way, he felt haunted for hours afterward whenever they met. And he couldn't imagine why her father let her do it, particularly given what had happened to him, and her mother. Clearly, as Gallina said, they were mad.

At the end of the show, he and Toby took the horses back to their tent, and brushed and fed them, and then he walked slowly back to the trailer with his son. He felt dizzy and almost drunk from the sounds and smells of the circus that day. He could still hear the music in his head.

"I watched Christianna Markovich tonight," Nick said casually to Toby as they wandered home. Their own performance had been exhilarating that night. Pegasus had been the hit of the show, and Nick along with him. "That's an insane thing to do," Nick said, still feeling queasy when he thought of what he'd seen Christianna doing. At any moment, she could have plummeted to her death, with the smallest slip. Gallina's high-wire act was entertaining. Christianna's was death-defying magic. There was a huge difference, and Nick had been aware of it instantly.

"Everyone says they're crazy," Toby said nonchalantly.

"Her father certainly is, to let her do it. I would kill you if you ever wanted to do something that dangerous." Nick still couldn't understand it. Nothing justified the risk.

"It's what they do," Toby said with a grin. In six weeks, the circus and everything that went with it had begun to seem normal to him. And now that he was infatuated with Katja, he was having fun there. Their romance was blazing. Both families were aware of it, and thought it was sweet, as long as it didn't get out of hand. And Gallina watched Katja carefully and had strict rules. Nick had warned his son not to go too far-she was a nice girl. Toby had promised to be reasonable. It was innocent and sweet, and their parents wanted it to stay that way.

That night as he lay in bed in his trailer, Nick thought about Christianna again, and her extraordinary high-wire act. He couldn't get her out of his mind. He could still see her dancing on the wire, turning backward and then forward again, high above the crowd. He had nightmares about it that night, as though he could see her falling, and in his dream he reached out to catch her, but couldn't get to her in time, and she fell into a deep hole in silence, her eyes watching him until she disappeared. Nick woke up in a cold sweat, and was still thinking about her when he went back to sleep. He felt better in the morning, but he hated what he had seen the night before. That much danger seemed like too much to him. He said something about it to Gallina that afternoon, and she rolled her eyes.