Calamity Jayne And The Trouble With Tandems Part 31

"Learning from them. Trust me. I'm somewhat of an authority on the screw-up/wise-up process."

He grinned. "Yer cute," he slurred.

"Oh? Which one of us?" I teased, figuring the guy had to be close to seeing double.

"You got a sense of humor. Keelie doesn't. She's always angry," he said.

"She's got a lot of responsibility for someone so young," I said. "Lots on the line. Lots to prove. It can't be easy."

"Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." Jax said, obviously too much in his cups to realize how wise I sounded and how whiney he did. "Enough serious talk. It's time to party!"

"I think you've partied enough," I said, looking around for someone who might a.s.sist the singer safely back to wherever he was staying and tuck him in for the night. I so wasn't the girl for the job.

"What the-" I heard Jax say and looked in the direction he seemed fixated on.

I blinked. Keelie Keller sashayed up to the mechanical, got a leg up from a helpful cowboy, and hopped on the back.

"What's she doing? She's nuts!" Jax said. "Hey, you! Kay-Kay! Yeah. I'm talkin' to you, Red!"

Before I could grab hold of him, Jax vaulted on top of the bar. Keelie stared over the heads of the crowd and found Jax.

"Step down off that bull, missy!" he said, trying to sound like Duke Wayne, but sounding more like Wayne Newton with a bad head cold.

"Go away, Jax Whitver! Go away and leave me alone!"

"You want me to go away? Back off? Fine. Quit this stupid ride, and I'm gone, baby, gone. Like that." He tried to snap his fingers, but couldn't get them to cooperate.

"Get off the bar! You're gonna break your neck," I hissed.

"Hear that, Keelie? I could break my neck, she says. Would you even care?"

Oh, G.o.d. Talk about gonna regret it in the morning.

"You're drunk, Jax!" Keelie yelled. "And you can't tell me what to do any more. I'm so over you."

"You're gonna regret this, Keelie. I know it."

"Go home, Jax Whitver. Just go home."

I grabbed his pant leg. "I'd suggest a cab."

Jax dropped to his backside, his legs dangling over the edge of the bar.

"I can't leave her," he said. "I can't."

I helped him down off the bar. "Let's call you a cab," I said.

"I'm a cab," he said, and giggled.

I pulled my phone out to Google the cab number and frowned. No bars.

"Dang." A steel building in the middle of nowhere probably wasn't the best place to pick up a cell signal. "You stay right there!" I ordered. "Don't move. I'm going to step outside and call you a cab."

"I won't be able to hear you call me a cab if you go outside," he said.

I shook my head. Why me?

I hurried outside. Still no bars.

I walked about twenty steps, checking for a signal, when everything around me went pitch dark. Lights out. Literally.

Screams and shouts erupted. Cowboys and cowgirls and everyone in between spilled out of the saloon...er, steel out-building, like a herd of stampeding livestock.

"What in G.o.d's name?"

I pointed my cell phone at the ground to light my way and started back toward the building.

"What happened? What's going on?" I asked no one in particular.

"Chaos, that's what," a girl near me said. "All of a sudden the lights went out, and it was pitch dark. I heard a bang and a scream, and I just took off for the exit."

"A bang? As in a gun?"

"I don't know. I just got the h.e.l.l out."

Police cars, top lights going and spotlights shining, rolled up to the scene, illuminating the outside area.

"Calm down, everyone. Take it easy!" An officer shouted and jogged around the side of the building. Moments later, the lights were back on. People continued to stream from the saloon.

I ran back inside in time to see Manny kneeling over a p.r.o.ne figure near the mechanical bull.

Oh, no! Keelie!

I held my breath. Hoping. Praying.

"I'm okay," I heard her say. "Just had the air knocked out of me."

"Don't be a hero. You need to get checked out, kid," Vinny Vincent barked. "We need an ambulance!"

"No. I'm fine. Honest. I just took a spill on the mats. I'm perfectly okay. I was just a little freaked out when the lights went out, but I'm fine now."

Manny helped the pet.i.te redhead to her feet and walked her through the crowd to the door. She looked over at me for a moment before Manny ushered her out.

I hurried up to the bar. "Did you see what happened to the guy on the bar?" I asked.

He shook his head. "He disappeared right after you left. One minute he was there, and the next, he was gone. Then, bam! The lights went out."

Despite the warmth of the night I shivered.

Jax's words played in my head. "You're gonna regret this, Keelie," he'd said.

Coincidence or...something more?

I looked at the handmade sign over the saloon doors.

Ya'll Come Back Saloon.

Um, let's don't and say we did.

The party pretty much broke up after that. More than ready to sack out, I hopped a shuttle back to the campgrounds. I stood outside the tent I'd hurriedly erected earlier and ran a dubious eye over the already sagging structure.

"Barbie looks like she's surveying the gateway to h.e.l.l."

Close. Real close.

"What are you doing here?" I covered my eyes from the glare of Manny's super bright flashlight beam.

"Manny's lookin' for a night's lodging," he said.

All the spit in my mouth dried up. My pulse rate skyrocketed faster than my credit card balance Christmas Eve day.

"A night's...lodging?" I squeaked, breaking out in a cold sweat when I noticed the rolled-up sleeping bag in his hand.

"Bus won't start. No air. Hotter than a blast furnace."

"So, you want to stay here?" I wiped perspiration from above my lip.

"Manny wants Red to stay here."

"Red?"

I'll admit it. It took me longer than it should have to get his gist. Totally justified. Tell me your brain wouldn't take a holiday at the idea of sharing a tent with Manny DeMarco, man of mystery.

"Keelie."

"Keelie? Keelie Keller? Wait. You want me to share a tent with Keelie Keller? You've got to be joking." Or on some pretty powerful, mind-altering pharmaceuticals.

"Manny doesn't kid."

I had learned that about him.

"You're serious?"

"Keelie needs a place to sleep. A safe place to sleep. Manny's got to see to the bus-and other things."

I swallowed and stared up at him. "By other things, you mean Jax."

He neither confirmed nor denied my statement. Typical.

"Why me of all people? Your 'charge' thinks I'm the one responsible for all sorts of nefarious deeds."

"Manny knows better."

The c.o.c.kles of my heart warmed. Unconditional trust. What a concept.

"What about Keelie? Does she know better?"

"Did you forget? Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer." Keelie Keller, big ol' purse in hand, squeezed around Manny's girth.

"Did you forget it's polite to wait for an invitation?" I pointed at the tent behind me. "How do you know I don't have a guy in there?"

"Manny told me. Manny says you're all by your lonesome."

Someone was taking literary license here. I couldn't see Manny using the term "lonesome".

"How accommodating of him," I observed, giving Mr. DeMarco a you-will-pay look.

"Yes or no?" Manny, the man of few words, asked.

"You can't find any place else?"

"Whatever. I'll sleep on the bus," Keelie said.

Manny looked at me and lifted a dark eyebrow.

c.r.a.p. I was so gonna cave.

"All right. On one condition," I told Manny, figuring I might as well get something out of the deal.

"Manny's listening."

"I ask you five questions. You give me five truthful responses," I said.

"Deal," Manny placed Keelie's sleeping bag in my hands and handed her the flashlight. "Be back at six sharp," he said and was gone.

"They come. They go. They're here. They're there." I said.

"Who?" Keelie asked.

"Men."

She nodded. "Tell me about it."

We entered the tent. I tossed her bedroll on the left side of the tent. "You can bed down there," I said.

Keelie shined the flashlight at the sleeping bag and shook her head. "No. No. Not going to work. I always sleep on the right side of the bed."

I blinked. Was she for real? I know. Dumb question to ask when referring to a reality TV star, right?