Broken Pasts Part 3

"That's not what I'm after," I told her. "He's interesting. I just want to see what makes him tick, you know?"

"My guess would be that it's seven inches long and just dying to break out of those stuffy black slacks."

"Jamie!" I said and then forced myself to lower my voice. "Be serious. For the first time ever, I'm happy that Glen left me when he did. I think I'd have been trapped if he didn't, you know?"

"You mean you wouldn't have been able to screw the s.e.xy bodyguard?" I rolled my eyes.

"I snuck into the bathroom to talk to you, you know. The least you could do is be grateful about it." Jamie chuckled.

"You know I love you, Theresa. Don't stress so much. We'll talk all about it on bowling night. I gotta go. Joel's got a dentist appointment, so I have to drop the boys off at school before I go to work, but save that and any other life revelations for Friday, okay?"

"Alright, I love you, too. Bye."

I ended the call and leapt down from the counter. Nathaniel was waiting outside the door with a small smile on his face while Rhea sat at his feet with her legs crossed.

"Nathaniel said he's your boyfriend," Rhea informed me and I was grateful to see that he'd kept up the ruse. It meant a lot, whether he knew it or not. "Which means the necklace worked." I reached down, grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet.

"It sure did," I said, trying to change the subject before I got too deeply involved in my own lie. "Now, why don't you help me pick out some clothes, so we can eat. I'm starving."

"Will you be happy now?" she asked me, completely serious. Her face was twisted into an expression that was far too grown-up for a nine year old. "Now that you have love and a p.e.n.i.s?" Nathaniel snorted, actually snorted. I'd been expecting a deep, silky chuckle, like dark chocolate or something, but his laugh wasn't like that at all. It was so ... real. Human.

"Absolutely," I answered as she glanced over her shoulder at him. "Now let's go before they run out of pancakes."

Apparently, to a nine year old, being chauffeured in the back of a sleek, black car with tinted windows and leather seats is the coolest thing in the world.

"Is Nathaniel a prince?" she'd whispered to me as she'd eaten her pancakes, syrup and all, on those very same leather seats. I owe you big time, Mr. Sutherland.

"Nope," I replied, trying to keep the conversation light. "You want a bite of my Mcm.u.f.fin?"

"What does he do then?" she asked, her mind still attached to the previous question. She stared at me, brown eyes wide, hair braided down her back and tied with a furry, purple hairband that she'd picked out all on her own.

"I'm a security officer," Nathaniel replied, voice light and cheerful. He was good at playing the boyfriend character, great actually. Rhea and Gary had never really hit off like this which should've been a bright red flag to me. What was I thinking? Rhea's eyes widened.

"Do you have a gun?" she asked as she tried to take off her seat belt and stick her head between the front seats. I pushed her back gently and refastened it.

"Couple," Nathaniel replied, looking at me through the rearview mirror as if to confirm that what he was saying was okay. I nodded. "One under my jacket and one strapped to my ankle."

"Why?" she asked as she pushed her half eaten platter towards me.

"The better to protect your mother with, my dear," he joked and G.o.d help me, but I thought it was kind of ... cute. Good lord, woman, get a hold of yourself. You're thirty-two years old. You get to know men before you start fawning over them, remember? Cute is not a descriptor that you need to be using for judgmental purposes.

"Why?" she asked as I put my hand out and rested it on her arm.

"We're going through a 'why' phase right now," I said as I gave her the eye. "Once is more than enough when it comes to other people's business, remember?"

"It's okay," Nathaniel said as he pulled the vehicle up to the line of cars waiting to get into the loop where the kids were dropped off. He'd done it without a hitch, too. Surprising since I always ended up going in the wrong way and causing a traffic jam. "I protect good people from bad people. That's why I need the guns, just in case."

"But why do you want to protect them?" she asked, sounding exasperated as she picked at her zebra patterned leggings.

"Rhea ... "

"Because I've seen what happens when someone doesn't. It doesn't just hurt the good person. It hurts their whole family. I just don't want to see anyone else get hurt like that." Rhea opened her mouth at the same moment that I wrapped my hand around her head and gave her a big, fat kiss.

"Mom!" she yelled as she pushed away from me and grabbed her backpack. "Gross!" Rhea grabbed the door handle and started to climb out.

"Look for this car after school, okay?" I paused as her teacher, Mr. Clarke, moved over to us and checked Rhea in with a clipboard. "And don't go with anyone else, do you understand?" She ignored me and raced to catch up with a group of girls near the gated entrance.

"Is everything okay, Theresa?" he asked me, eyeing the car, and its driver, with interest.

"It's just ... I'm having a personal problem and I don't want Rhea to get involved. Please, don't let her leave with anyone except for me." Mr. Clarke watched me for a moment and I could see that his curiosity was piqued. To his credit though, he asked nothing.

"Of course." I smiled.

"Thank you so much," I said as the cars behind us started to honk. You'd think having kids would teach you some manners, you spoiled rotten brats. I was, of course, referring to the parents and not the children. As I waved goodbye to both Mr. Clarke and Rhea, I closed the door and made a promise that I would get him an apple or something as a gift. "Do you think she'll be okay?" I asked, thinking aloud. "I mean, the school is gated and they do have their own police officer, but I just ... "

"Stalkers are usually fairly single-minded. It's doubtful that Gary would go after Rhea. That doesn't mean you want to leave her unsupervised, but she'll be fine at school."

"Will you stay outside her door tonight?" I asked. If something happened to me, I'd deal with it, but Rhea ... I shivered to even consider it.

"Absolutely," he told me and his voice was firm and confident, strong. I had no qualms about trusting him with my daughter's life, strange as that sounds. Something about Nathaniel was just right on target for me. I had never felt this way about anyone before, not once. It was both scary and exhilarating. And now I was even more interested. I just don't want to see anyone else get hurt like that. He'd said anyone else, meaning people other than him. Meaning he'd been hurt before.

"Thank you," I told him. "For pretending. I appreciate that."

"It's okay," he replied and I could hear the slightest touch of amus.e.m.e.nt in his voice. "I've done it before though I can honestly admit that it's never been this pleasant." I felt myself flush with pleasure at that statement, thoroughly convinced that that was also not a very professional thing to say. "I've been an uncle, a son, a cousin, an attorney," he stressed it like a joke and pretended to shudder. "A vampire." I laughed.

"A vampire?" I asked, amused. "Sounds like the perfect cover for a bodyguard. Much less suspicious." Nathaniel laughed and it was that same snorting, silly laugh from before. It was the kind of laugh that made you want to join in alongside it, like he'd seen enough in his life to know what was really funny and that you could trust him on it.

"The client was this lovely, young woman who'd changed her name from Anna Yearling to Erika Van Doe. She was involved in an underground drug ring full of people who believed they were actually vampires. Some of the most horrifying moments of my life were spent in that woman's bas.e.m.e.nt." Nathaniel paused. "So much for client confidentiality," he said as if he were disappointed in himself. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you that."

"If it makes you feel any better, I thought it was pretty funny." He laughed then, suddenly, like he was nervous, which was strange because the thought of Nathaniel being nervous about anything seemed a near impossibility. "Just don't go telling anybody that I stay up late to watch crime dramas or I'll sue you." His laughter this time was guilt free, feel good laughter, the kind you can sink your teeth into.

"I promise I won't," he a.s.sured me and I believed him.

Isn't it interesting how much you can tell about someone from their laugh?

CHAPTER 8.

"I work as a web developer and I don't even like computers. Is that weird?" I asked Nathaniel as he held open the door to my office for me. And he always opened and closed the car doors, too. Perfect gentleman, I thought and then I tried to inject myself with a dose of reality. He's a professional bodyguard, not your boyfriend. Boyfriend. Ech. I was too old for boyfriends. I wanted a partner, a friend, a lover, a confidante. Was I asking too much?

"Not at all," he told me, green eyes glittering with amus.e.m.e.nt. "I used to work as a Linux system administrator." I turned around and walked backwards for a moment, so I could get a good look at his face.

"You?" I asked, surprised. "Seriously?" Nathaniel was too good looking for such an invisible job. All of that body buried behind a desk. Shame. I swallowed hard and turned back around, laying my hands across the front of my secretary's desk.

"Very briefly," he admitted. "Just long enough to prove that college hadn't been a complete waste of my time."

"And then you found your pa.s.sion in security?" I said with a smile. His face shut down then, turned off completely. The light in Nathaniel's eyes faded, leaving him with a haunted look that I hadn't seen before.

"I guess you could say that," he told me, but his voice was neutral, not at all playful or conversational. Another piece to the puzzle, I thought as I gave him the privacy I was pretty sure he wanted and turned my attention back to the door behind the desk. Maybe he's going to be an easier nut to crack than I'd first thought.

"Good morning, Brenda," I said as my secretary popped out the door with a doughnut in her mouth and a completely inappropriate top draped over her ma.s.sive b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Let's just say, it was white, her bra was black, enough said. But she was a sweet girl and she was smart and eager to learn. I had taken her on more as an apprentice than as a secretary, but since she seemed to function perfectly well at both, that's the way we ran it. As soon as she saw Nathaniel, the doughnut fell from her mouth in a blaze of glaze and landed right on the brand new, leather office chair I had just ordered. She cringed and s.n.a.t.c.hed it back up in a hurry, tossing it into the garbage can under her desk.

"S-sorry," she said as she grabbed her tablet and moved the stylus around like she was running a marathon with her fingers. As she did this, she bit her lower lip and ran her tongue across her teeth. "Is this a new client?" she asked, voice overtly incurious, nonchalant. I looked over my shoulder at Nathaniel and saw that he'd replaced his sungla.s.ses and was standing with his hands crossed over his belly, arms stiff, shoulders back, very much the professional. Defense mechanism maybe?

"Brenda, this is my bodyguard, Nathaniel. He'll be spending the week with me." I paused and wondered exactly how much I should tell her. Satisfied that it was now 'okay' to look at him, Brenda let her blue eyes rake Nathaniel's suited form which still looked as pressed and as polished as it had yesterday morning.

"Lovely to meet you," she said as she batted her blonde eyelashes and pa.s.sed the tablet over the top of the counter to me. I stared at Nathaniel's frozen face and decided that maybe it would be better if he wasn't 'allowed' to talk while he was here.

"He can't talk," I said apologetically as I checked the maelstrom of s.h.i.t that had occurred over my long holiday weekend. "Just pretend that he's not even there, okay?" I handed the tablet back with a smile and led Nathaniel down the hallway to my personal office.

I had a very, very long day ahead of me.

With the amount of work I had for the week, I was going to have to pull all-nighters to get it all done, but then, I couldn't let anyone else pick up Rhea. The risk to reward ratio was not a good one, so at three o'clock, Nathaniel and I left for Rhea's school.

While I was internally debating the benefits of going back to the office or doing some work from home, I checked my phone and found several missed calls from a restricted number. My first thought was, of course, Gary, but I checked the messages just to be certain. Sure enough, as soon as they started to play, there was his voice, light and normal, like nothing strange had happened between us.

"Hey Theresa, it's me, Gary. I just wanted to see if you and Rhea were up for bowling night on Friday. Could you call me back and let me know which alley? Okay, I love you. Bye."

"Hey Theresa, it's me, Gary. I was calling to ask if you wanted to get together for dinner tonight. I know you're busy, but it would mean the world to me. How about that place we went for New Year's Eve? Call me back. I love you. Bye."

"Hey Theresa, you stupid f.u.c.king b.i.t.c.h. You can't f.u.c.king ignore me. You cannot f.u.c.king ignore me, do you hear me? Are you just mentally f.u.c.ked or do you like playing games with people's hearts? This is my heart, Theresa. Mine. And I won't let you screw it up."

"Hey Theresa, your new boyfriend can't be there every minute, baby. When you're done sucking his d.i.c.k, he'll leave and I'll be there. Or maybe I should rephrase that. I am here. That's a cute little skirt you're wearing and I like the red top, very s.e.xy. Maybe when we're alone I'll "

I ended the call. Four messages from that man were four too many. If I had to hear him say in words what he'd said in the note, I might just have a nervous breakdown.

"He called me," I told Nathaniel, trying to hold myself in check. "I got a new number yesterday and he already knows it. He "

"It's alright," Nathaniel said as he finally removed the sungla.s.ses he'd been wearing all day. The sight of his eyes, clear and confident in the rearview gave me the burst of energy I needed to take a ma.s.sive breath, slow my heart rate and relax. "It happens. We'll change the number again, as many times as we need to. When you give it out, give it to as few people as you can and let them know that under no circ.u.mstances are they to share it with anyone. Try to think of it as a good thing that he called. This establishes a pattern of inappropriate behavior, gives us the evidence that we need to get him arrested. The more he does it while I'm here, the better." I saw him purse his lips in the mirror. "What happens if he's still stalking you when the week's out?"

"I don't know," I replied honestly. I hadn't thought that far ahead. Somewhere in my mind, I was still convinced that if I just waited Gary out, that he would go away. "I guess I'll deal with it when the time comes." Nathaniel nodded, but he didn't look happy. I dropped my gaze from the mirror and waited in silence until we got to the school.

Rhea was a welcome burst of energy when she got in the car, like a fireworks display in pink and zebra. She handed me some paintings from art cla.s.s and even had one for Nathaniel. In keeping with her current theme, it was ... well, it was a p.e.n.i.s. With a note attached for a parent-teacher conference. I decided to laugh it off rather than stress it off as I ruffled her hair and tried to keep her from taking off her seat belt.

"But I made it for him," she whined as she tried to toss the paper into the front seat.

"Mr. Sutherland is driving," I said as I tried to distract her with the other pieces. "What's this one? Is this a cat?" She ignored me and crossed her arms over her chest, refusing to even look at me. In a surprise move, Nathaniel pulled the car over to the curb, turned around and smiled at Rhea.

"Let me see," he said and in his voice was genuine interest. She whipped around in less time than it took me to blink and thrust the painting of the ma.s.sive green and purple phallus at him.

"This is you," she said as she pointed at the crinkled watercolor. Nathaniel raised his dark eyebrows and then against his better judgment, he let out another nervous snort of laughter.

"True to size, too," he said as he glanced up at me and I flushed, bright as scarlet. He blinked, too, like he'd just realized what he'd said and cleared his throat. "I apologize," he grumbled. "That was completely inappropriate. I "

"Are you guys getting married?" Rhea asked as she slumped back in her seat with a sigh, completely oblivious to the fact that there was something going on between Nathaniel and I. I could barely hear her over the rush of blood that was pounding in my ears like drums. Lower parts of me clenched and tightened, begging for something. No, not something, Nathaniel. And it was different than the l.u.s.t I'd felt even a few nights before with Stuart. I didn't just want to sleep with him because I was lonely or because I was turned on. I wanted to sleep with him because I was starting to like him. That was a dangerous word to me, especially with everything that had happened. The men that I'd liked had let me down in the worst ways. I turned my face away and tried to laugh off Rhea's words.

"Mommy's never walking down the aisle again," I said and I was surprised when she kicked the back of the pa.s.senger seat in anger. "What's wrong?" I asked as Nathaniel took the paper and folded it gently in half, tucking it into the dash.

"I want a new dad," she told me and I blinked in surprise. Her face was locked into such a deep frown that there were two lines running down the sides of her chin like a marionette. I sat there in silence for a moment while I waited for her to continue. She didn't.

"How come?" Nathaniel asked for me, still smiling softly. It looked good on that strong face, like he could crush a car but also like he could pick up a b.u.t.terfly without harming it.

"Because I don't like mine," she said as if that was obvious. "He gives Angie, Carrie, and Mina anything they want. He doesn't let me go see Grandpa B. and Grandma G., and he told me that I didn't come from his p.e.n.i.s." A rush of anger struck through me, fighting with my reaction to Nathaniel for supremacy. We were back to p.e.n.i.ses again which was good, in a way, but the fact that Glen had told Rhea she was adopted without my consent or knowledge, even in a roundabout way, was infuriating. I clenched my purse in my fist and tried not to scream. That could come later, when I got Glen on the phone. "Mom," she asked tentatively, as if this was the most important thing in the world. "Am I a part of you?" I thought for a long moment about how to answer, what would const.i.tute a lie, how important the truth was in that moment. I looked her straight in the face when I said.

"The most important part of all."

"I want to apologize again," Nathaniel said later, after we'd come home and Rhea had taken a bath and gone to bed. I'd hardly gotten any work done, too occupied was I with wanting to kill Glen and Gary. A husband is supposed to be a partner, someone to take on life with you, not throw the worst parts of it in your face. Not stand outside your house and stare like a f.u.c.king lunatic which is what Gary had done for over an hour after we'd come home to find him outside. Nathaniel had recorded the entire thing out the window while Rhea and I had hidden in her room, playing video games. Now he was finally gone and I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. "I was completely inappropriate and in front of your daughter, too. I'd like to refund some of your money." I stared at him for a long moment, trying to process his words. True to size, too. Okay, so maybe it was a little inappropriate, but it had also been wildly s.e.xy. Rhea hadn't understood, so where was the harm?

"No," I said as I shook my head and opened the freezer, eyes locked on the last remaining drops of my Jagermeister. If there was ever an appropriate time to have some, it was now. I poured the rest into a gla.s.s. "You're more than doing your job. I won't accept a refund." Nathaniel paused with his hands resting on the blue tiles of the island.

"Then let me at least give you an extra couple days of protection, no charge." I sipped the Jager quietly for a moment and then once again, shook my head. Nathaniel was beautiful and interesting and different. Dangerous. He was dangerous. In solving this mystery, I was going to get involved. Two days of knowing him and already, I was enraptured. I couldn't do this.

"No," I said and nearly dropped my gla.s.s when there was a knock on the door. Nathaniel smiled at me, but it was kind of ... sad. I stared into his eyes for a moment that stretched into forever. He was searching me for something though I couldn't say what.

"Cedric," he explained and I couldn't control the slump of disappointment that surged through me. I'd just told myself that I wanted the man to leave and now that he was, I wanted him to stay. Okay, this is good. I needed to untangle myself from Nathaniel Sutherland before I ensnared myself. "He'll be here for awhile while I recharge." I nodded and watched as he turned back towards the door.

"Wait!" I shouted and he paused, looking over his shoulder at me. "Um, will you be back in time for bowling night?" I had told Rhea the lie and although Jamie knew the truth, her family didn't. The less people that knew Gary was stalking me, the better. I did not want Glen to find out, especially when I was about to tear him to pieces; he'd be furious.

"What time?" he asked me and I could see that he would do whatever it took to fulfill my request. But why?

"Tomorrow at six," I said, hoping that wasn't too early. I didn't know how this whole switching thing worked. Nathaniel smiled and this time, it was naughty.

"I'll be here," he said. "And don't worry, I always come on time." I choked on my Jager and watched as he turned away and grasped the handle on the door. Did he really just say that? What is it with this man?

I didn't have long to speculate because when Nathaniel opened the door, I was greeted to a redhead who towered over Nathaniel's already ma.s.sive form. He looked like a Viking. I glanced up at his face, surprised at how short I felt at five foot ten.

"Theresa McMaster, this is Cedric Bair."

"Wonderful to meet you, Ms. McMaster," Cedric boomed, stepping into the room and filling it to capacity with his hulking shoulders and a chest that was wider than I was tall. He reached out a ma.s.sive hand and shook mine in a surprisingly gentle grasp.

"Again, just try to pretend he isn't here. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I'll be back tomorrow at five," Nathaniel said and I could see that this last part was more for Cedric than it was for me. The man's s.h.a.ggy red brows rose in surprise and he rubbed at his goatee with thick fingers. This was not usual protocol, I was certain about it now. Nathaniel left, closing the door quietly behind him. Cedric immediately moved forward and locked it with a rumbling chuckle. He wasn't quite the uptight, professional I was expecting either, but I knew that there was no way in h.e.l.l Gary would even think of challenging the man whose head nearly brushed my ceiling. When he turned around, he locked his gaze on the archway between the kitchen and the living room and crossed his hands in front of him without another word.

"Why did you laugh?" I asked, catching a glint of amus.e.m.e.nt in Cedric's dark eyes. They were like two pieces of polished onyx, small in his large face but full of humor. In a weird way, he reminded me of Jamie. If I was even remotely correct, then he'd be a bit of a gossip.

"I apologize, Ms. McMaster," was all he said as he maintained his position. G.o.d, he's good.

"You can tell me," I said, hoping I could convince him to trust me. "I'm not the typical client."