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The aroma of fresh eggs and sausage filled the room and set his stomach rumbling.
He closed the door and placed the tray on the sidetable, then motioned Deirdre forward. She joined him eagerly.
"This smells wonderful! But why so much? Are you really that hungry?"
He chuckled. "I don't know. It seemed so this morning. And I want you to regain your strength as well. Eat hearty. We have some walking to do today. But directly after breakfast, I am going to the Lair. I want to check on Thale and discuss Anika with Darius."
Deirdre turned to him. "But that will deplete your magic won't it? Wouldn't it be better to use that magic to find Anika? Thale is in good hands, you know that. And I would suppose that someone would fetch you straightaway if he took a turn for the worse."
Baris met her gaze, puzzled that she seemed to be trying to persuade him not to go. Yet, the moment he looked into her eyes, he realized she made considerable sense. Plus there was the slim chance that if the boy wasn't already infected with Anika's illness, Baris could take it to him. He nodded. "Yes, I suppose you're right. And Thale probably needs rest more than anything else. Thank you, Deirdre. You seem to be able to sort out my confused state of mind. Let's eat. Then we can start our search for Anika anew."
She nodded, gave him a small smile and dished up her food.
CHAPTER 6.
They left the inn later that morning. The sun was shining and the air was crisp, which gave Baris a strange sense of well-being. He took a deep breath of the fresh mountain air as they walked along the main street and smiled at Deirdre. He noticed at once that she was shivering.
"We need to get you a proper cloak," he said. "That one you have on is more suited for the lowlands than up here in the mountains."
"It's fine. I don't want to waste my money on such extravagances."
He looped one of his arms through hers. "Then we'll waste mine," he told her and led her to a shop across the wide dirt street.
Inside it was warm and cozy. The shelves were lined with all sorts of apparel from cloaks to nightwear. St.u.r.dy boots lined one wall, while hats of various shapes and material hung on pegs above. Deirdre went at once to the hats, while Baris perused the selection of heavy wool cloaks.
He shook out a dark red one, holding it up, picturing how it would look with Deirdre's dark hair lying against it. As he did so, his eye caught on a royal blue wrap. Slowly, he laid the red one aside and picked up the blue one. Blue. It was Anika's favorite color. It brought out the glacial blue of her eyes like no other color. By the Sovereign, how he missed gazing into those eyes.
With a heavy sigh, he replaced the blue cloak, reclaimed the red and turned toward Deirdre. A smile touched his lips. She had placed a wool hat atop her dark curls and was examining her reflection in a small mirror hanging on one wall. The hat was a reddish color, sporting a variety of feathery plumes in brilliant white. A piece of embossed red leather circled the crown of the hat. It was imprinted with bird designs, each bird's tail plumage touching the next bird's beak. It was garish and bright, yet at the same time it looked s.e.xily appropriate on Deirdre. Carefully avoiding the mirror and his lack of reflection in it, Baris joined her.
"It looks wonderful," he said.
She blushed and took the hat off. "It's far too loud."
"It looks wonderful," he repeated firmly, then held out the cloak. "Here, try this on." He slipped it over her shoulders and tied it beneath her chin. "The collar is satin, so it won't chafe your neck or chin."
She reached up to stroke the soft material at her nape, then looked into the mirror. "It's beautiful, Baris, but it's quite costly, is it not?"
"Don't worry over that." He took the hat from her and placed it back on her head. "And it looks fabulous with the hat."
She appraised herself in the mirror. "Do you think so?"
"I do, indeed." He turned toward the merchant, who had been watching them silently. "I think we'll take both. She'll wear them."
"Both?" Deirdre gasped. "But, Baris, the cost!"
He waved her protests away and eyed the merchant, who was now grinning widely, apparently expecting to hear the clink of coin into his outstretched palm. Instead, Baris gazed into the man's eyes. It took only a moment to convince the merchant that no payment was necessary, and his hand dropped limply to the countertop. Baris was aware of Deirdre's eyebrows rising in--what? Surprise? Awe? Delight?
Baris took her by the elbow and steered her toward the door. Once outside, he rolled her old cloak and stuffed it into his pack. It would make an extra layer in case they found themselves without the benefit of an inn. He glanced up and down the street. Neither of them spoke about the incident that had just occurred.
"Well, since you scryed for Anika last eve and she wasn't here," Baris said, "I suggest we move on toward Nowles. I can take council with Jaeger and Rhiannon. Perhaps they can use their magic to find her. Once we are out of the village, I will shapeshift so you don't have to walk the entire day. Breakfast and rest have restored my strength."
"Mine as well. I don't mind walking. I fear I indulged too much in breakfast. The walk will do me good."
He laughed and started down the street in the direction they had come the night before.
"This Illusion you've created," Deirdre said, gesturing at his body as they walked. "Why such an old man?"
Baris shrugged. "I thought it would be best. I wouldn't want to spoil any attention you might garner from a local young man."
Deirdre wrinkled her nose. "And who says I wish attention from any young man? Besides, they might all stay away, thinking you're my father."
Baris chuckled. "Then what should I look like?"
"Well, I would wish you could appear as yourself, without having to use an Illusion, but I know that's not safe." She sighed, glancing up at him from the corner of her eye. "So--how about a handsome younger man? Someone I would be proud to be seen with, instead of a dotty old man?"
"Dotty?" Baris lifted his eyebrows in amus.e.m.e.nt. "I am not dotty."
She grinned. "Well, maybe not dotty, but certainly old. So, next Illusion, do I get a younger man?"
"I'll think about it. Even if I'll then likely have to fight off your potential suitors."
Deirdre laughed again, and a short time later they left the small village for the forest. The walk was invigorating, filled with laughter and conversation. Baris had to actually remind himself of his goal...that he was searching for Anika. When that happened, he couldn't believe how easily she had slipped from his mind. It was disconcerting and puzzling. Still, Deirdre's bubbly chatter seemed to keep his despair at bay, which wasn't necessarily a bad thing; and by lunchtime, he was in almost a jovial mood himself.
They stopped beside a shallow brook to rest and eat. Baris was amazed at the way rest, proper food and blood had restored his mood and strength. He was feeling almost normal again.
"If you could build the fire while I prepare lunch, it will save a little time," Deirdre said.
Baris willingly gathered the kindling. It didn't take him long to have a respectable flame going. Deirdre filled the teapot with water from the stream and set it to boil. She gestured at the stream. "Would you like me to try scrying again?"
Baris started, realizing it was the first time in several hours that Anika had crossed his mind. He frowned. He wished he could talk to Deirdre about these peculiar lapses in focus, but found the idea of confessing them somewhat embarra.s.sing. What kind of man would forget about his own wife, knowing she was ill and lost? Was it possible she meant that little to him? And if she did, then why was he bothering to pursue her? Why not let her go? It was what she had said she wanted, and she was an adult. Surely she knew her own mind and heart. Why should he not simply go on himself?
He shook his head as though to drive the treacherous thoughts away and a familiar ache touched his heart. He did love Anika. He had loved her the moment he'd set eyes on her. And he did want to find her. He would not believe she truly wanted him gone from her life, not until he was certain she was well and in her right mind. He sighed and looked at the water.
"Do you think you'll be able to get a vision of her? If not, I don't want you to use your magic. It just makes you ill."
"I won't know unless I try," Deirdre said, rising. "No, you stay here. I work better alone."
Baris nodded and watched her move to the stream. She knelt beside it and bent over the water. Baris rubbed wearily at his face, got up and walked into the forest to attend to personal matters. The air was cool, the light dim. He wondered where Anika was, how she was surviving. She'd had nothing...no blankets, no food, no water. For the first time in hours, true despair clutched at Baris and he hurried back to the encampment to see what Deirdre had found. Without thinking he strode up next to her at the stream. A vision in the water immediately disappeared as she gasped, startled at his sudden appearance.
"That looked like Vail," he said.
"It...it was," she stammered. "I managed to locate him. I told him we were on our way to Nowles and asked him to meet us there."
"And Anika? Were you able to find her?"
Deirdre shook her head and climbed to her feet. "No. She must be using her magic to block mine. I truly don't think she wants to be found."
"It's beginning to look that way," Baris admitted reluctantly. Tears stung his eyes and he tipped his head back to gaze into the noon sky. "Why? Why would she do that? Does she truly despise me so much? She'll take Thale, I know it." He thought again about going to the Lair, just to be sure Thale was all right, to warn Darius that Anika might try to steal the boy away. And just as quickly the thought slipped away when Deirdre touched him.
She slipped her hand into his and squeezed gently. "Come, let's have something to eat. I'm sure Jaeger will be able to help you once we get to Nowles."
He allowed her to lead him back to the fire, where he slumped to the hard ground. Deirdre poured him a mug of tea, then laid out a simple meal of bread and cheese. Baris sipped his tea, watching her. He wondered about her relationship with Holt, if she truly did dislike him. Or was she only expressing her reluctance to be married and tied down while she was still so young?
Thoughts of Holt left a bitter taste in Baris' mouth. It was bad enough that Holt should treat Deirdre as a possession, but worse that he should give her a time frame in which to return to him. The thought that he would then hunt her down was repulsive. Baris wouldn't let Holt drag her back to the village unless Deirdre truly wanted to go. And he was quite certain she didn't.
The issue of Holt settled, Baris relaxed as the tea warmed his gut and calmed his anxiety over Anika's lengthening absence. Sunlight stole through the forest canopy and sent rainbows of color through Deirdre's hair. Baris had the sudden urge to touch it, to let his fingers caress its softness. He shook the thought away and ate his lunch in silence. Guilt tore at him, yet at the same time, he wanted to be with Deirdre. He couldn't understand his confused emotions.
It warmed his heart how she was trying so hard to help him find Anika. But there was more to his feelings than that. He had to be honest and admit he was drawn to her as a man to a woman. He liked her, found her engaging and fun to be around. Still, he had never in his married life entertained such thoughts for another woman. Was he doing so now because deep down he believed Anika had set him free?
He cringed at the very thought. Set him free? As if he had been trapped, enslaved? He hadn't. He loved Anika. He loved Thale. He wanted them to be a family again. He wanted things back the way they had been, though he had begun to fear they never could be. Not when his mind and his body were straying to another woman, a woman he had actually shared a bed with.
True, Deirdre said nothing had happened, but Baris knew in his gut that it had been very close. He had wanted Deirdre with every fiber of his being. His body ached for her even now, remembered how hers had felt against his. How could he go back to living in the same village with her, even if they found Anika and cured whatever afflicted her? His feelings of l.u.s.t were unlikely to disappear and at some point someone would be sure to notice. Then Anika would know and once that happened she would be well within her rights to leave him and take Thale with her. The thought tore Baris up inside and he could no longer sit still. He finished off his tea and handed the mug back to Deirdre, then got to his feet.
"We need to keep moving," he said. "Even at a brisk pace, it will take us two more days to get to Nowles. I need to shift into something that can give us that brisk pace."
Deirdre sighed but nodded. "I just hate the silence," she explained. "If I could converse with you while you are in animal form, it would be so much nicer."
"I'm sorry. I wish that were possible." He winced at her crestfallen look. His need to please her seemed strangely important to him. "How about a compromise then? I promise you that I won't spend more than half of each day in animal form. How's that?"
She smiled up at him and finished packing away the remnants of their lunch. "That sounds like an equitable exchange." She came to stand next to him, then looked toward the stream. "Would you like me to scry one more time before we move on? Just in case she's close by someplace?"
Baris paused, his gaze moving over the countryside as if he expected to see his wife step from the shrubbery. "What good would it do?" he sighed. "If she is blocking your magic, you still would not find her."
"But even Anika has to sleep," Deirdre pointed out. "And when she does, her magic shields will either drop or not be as effective. I might be able to sense her, at least. Let me try. Please."
He regarded her thoughtfully. "If you use magic, you will need to be bled again."
She averted her gaze, color rushing to her cheeks. "I'm sorry. I don't want to push you into something you find uncomfortable. I only thought that..."
He reached out and drew her close, wishing only to ease her obvious upset. "Uncomfortable? No, Deirdre, I do not find it uncomfortable. In fact, I may be finding it a little too comfortable. I told you that it was sometimes difficult to separate the...emotional...side of feeding from the physical act."
Still smiling, she placed one cool hand on his cheek. "I promise I'll be good," she said softly. She gently moved away from him to kneel down at stream's edge.
Baris suppressed a sigh. Good? You're not just good, he told her silently. You're sinfully exquisite.
CHAPTER 7.
They reached the small village of Terska just after dark. Baris wasn't taken with the unkempt streets or rundown buildings. Still, a room at the solitary inn would be preferable to sleeping on the ground in the cold, mountain air. He kept Deirdre close to his side as they walked. Whether it was her beauty or her expensive clothing that was garnering the attention Baris didn't know, but he wasn't going to take chances he didn't need to.
As per Deirdre's request, after having spent the morning as a horse, he had now shapeshifted to a young man. He was glad of it. His size and appearance might prove sufficiently intimidating to those leering men watching them. Nevertheless, he was relieved when he and Deirdre finally arrived at the inn. They slipped inside, closing the battered door against all further gawking.
"Kin I help you?" The innkeeper hefted his bulky frame from a sagging chair behind a littered, and dirty counter.
"Yes. We'd like two..." Baris was interrupted by Deirdre's gasp of dismay. He looked down at her.
"Do I have to stay alone?" she whispered.
Baris hesitated, remembering the dangers of being in such close quarters with her. Still, the fear in her dark eyes was daunting and he finally shook his head, patting her hand gently.
"No. I quite understand." He looked back at the innkeeper. "One room, please. If you have a cot I would like one sent up as well."
The innkeeper looked from Baris to Deirdre, where his gaze lingered for a long moment. Then a slight grin curved the man's mouth, and he took a key from underneath the counter. He shoved it at Baris, all the while watching Deirdre, his l.u.s.t obvious. It was hard for Baris to keep from laying the man flat. Instead, he s.n.a.t.c.hed up the key and escorted Deirdre up the sagging stairway and down a dimly lit hallway.
They found their room quickly; and, once inside, Baris bolted the door. Deirdre put down her pack, wrapped her arms about her chest and gave an unhappy sigh.
"I think I would have preferred sleeping in the woods," she mumbled.
"For someone who wants to see the world, you're awfully timid."
She grimaced at him. "Well, did you see the way those men were all staring? It's like they've never seen a woman before."
"Perhaps just not such a beautiful woman," Baris told her. He dropped his pack and went to light the fire. "Why don't you relax? Put away your things and brew us up some tea. I'll fetch something for dinner."
"You're not going out!"
He looked at her as he stood up and brushed the dust from the knees of his breeches. "The door will be bolted. And we're on the second floor. I think you'll be safe enough for a short while. It won't take me long. I promise."
She grabbed his arm. "If you just need to feed, Baris, that's why I'm here."
His stomach flipped at the mere thought of feeding on her again. He desperately wanted to but he wasn't sure if he could trust himself. And he didn't think she needed to be bled quite yet. He could find little iron in her scent.
"That's not why I'm going, Deirdre," he said softly. "I thought I sensed another Vector close by. I want to see if I can pick up any more traces of him. If I can find him, he might be able to help me locate Anika."
"Another Vector? Here? In the middle of nowhere?"
"I am here," he reminded her. "In the middle of nowhere." Gently, he pulled her hand from his arm and kissed it. "I will be very quick. Please, brew up some tea. I'll look forward to having it with dinner. And be sure to bolt the door behind me."
He hurried from the room before she could argue, and glanced about for a back staircase. There didn't appear to be one. With a grimace, he took the main staircase and quietly crept down it until he could see into the main room. The innkeeper was nowhere in sight and Baris hurried to the door and slipped outside. He didn't want anyone to see him go, didn't want anyone to know that Deirdre was there alone. At the same time, he wanted to decrease the amount of time he spent alone with her. Just the thought of bedding down in the same room was already causing a reaction, one that both disgusted and excited him. He put those thoughts and images aside and headed toward an eatery he had noticed upon entering town.
The place was crowded and hot, various odors mingling in the heavy air like a net to ensnare him. Baris made his way through the crowd and stepped up to the counter. A comely young woman was tending the bar and she gave him a wide, white smile, her gray eyes appraising him unabashedly.
"Kin I get you a drink, sir?" she asked, her voice light and lilting.
"No, thank you, la.s.s," Baris replied. "I want to order some dinner."