A Secret To Keep Part 17

"Why did you drop the case? You had everything to win. I know you said it was in Brayden's best interests, but..."

Sighing, Gates lowered his eyes momentarily from her gaze, "It was in his best interests. A wise person reminded me to put Brayden's feelings above my own. Taking him from you would've been the worst mistake I could've made. It would have been like what my father did to my mother. Being here with him today, I know he would've ended up resenting me the same way I resent Victor. I had to break the cycle."

"But-"

"Brayden's happy right here...with you," he said, placing his hand on hers, which were in their usual nervous state and he smiled, trying to rea.s.sure her. "It wasn't fair of me to try and take him from his home. You were right. I did turn into Victor and I hate it worse than anything. I didn't know how to stop it. I put other things ahead of you that I thought were important, but they weren't. I understand that now more than ever sitting here and looking at the stuff I missed with you and Brayden. It's my own fault and I have to live with it, but it doesn't mean he has to suffer because of my choices."

They sat in silence for a moment as she took in his explanation. She hated the fact he was being so hard on himself. Sloane knew Gates' heart and knew he was a good person at his core. He'd proved that by spending time with his son and wanting to be a part of his life.

"Were you really going to ruin my friends' reputations to win?"

Gates pushed himself up from the sofa and walked back to the mantel. She watched him scrub his face with his hands and then jam them into his pockets before his shoulders slumped and he turned. "I didn't know about Jax's visit to you. I didn't tell him to do it. I hope you know that. When I found out, I fired him and I realized I needed to back off."

"I have to admit, I was considering giving up when Jax showed up in my office. I was sure I had no chance at all and...that you hated me."

"Sloane, I could never hate you. I'm sorry about Jax. But I would never do anything to...well, I didn't want to see you hurt again because of me."

"Oh." His gaze softened and she could barely breathe as his eyes never left her face. She felt her heart rate increase with each pa.s.sing second.

"I never meant for any of that to happen. I'm glad Liyah mentioned it to me or I probably would have never known."

"Liyah? When did she talk to you?" Surprised by his admission, Sloane gasped. She wondered if she'd heard him right.

"She came to New York. I'm guessing only a few days after Jax visited you. Made sure I understood how important it was for you to keep Brayden and how I should try to work things out with you."

"I had no idea." She was struck dumb thinking of how wonderful her friends were. She had no idea Liyah had gone to such lengths.

"You've got some great friends. People who care about you and our son and I'm grateful for that. I'm also glad I got the chance to come and visit." She smiled at his last comment as he came back to take a seat beside her. She was glad he'd come to visit as well. She'd been uncertain about it and wondered if it would be awkward, but things were unexpectedly comfortable.

"Me too. It seems he's already pretty attached to you."

"I'm pretty attached to him too." Gates' near proximity made her a little lightheaded. She could feel the electricity and heat emanating from where their legs touched. Both sat staring at one another and she swallowed hard and bit her lower lip.

"Uh, it's getting late." Breaking the tension, she finally looked away from his intense glare.

"Yeah, I guess so. Sloane, I do want to help out with Brayden."

"All right." Obviously, he could tell she wasn't sure what he was referring to and he continued.

"I know you said he's in daycare, and I'm sure it's great. But you're so good with him and I want you to know that if you want, I'm willing to support him...and you. So you wouldn't have to work or worry about anything."

Sloane hadn't been prepared for his offer and she could feel her bottom lip grow slack as she tried to get a grip on what he was saying. Finally finding her voice again, she shook her head slowly. "Gates, you don't have to do that. We're fine. I-"

"Before you say no, hear me out. I'm not trying to control you or run your life or anything like that. I only want to give you the opportunity to spend even more time with him. You mentioned that before and I have the means to do it. And I want to do something to help and to support him as much as possible."

"Well, that's generous. It really is, but-"

"You don't have to say yes or no right now. Just do me a favor and consider it okay?" Gates looked at her with hopeful eyes and she knew he wanted to make sure he did everything he could to make up for the time lost with Brayden. "My mother would have killed for my father to give her the opportunity to spend time at home with me and Bailey. I simply want you to have the chance if you want it."

Nodding her head, Sloane smiled. "I promise I will think about it."

"Good."

"We probably should get some sleep if we're going to do all of the things we planned tomorrow." Before the intensity between them could return, Sloane cleared her throat and stood to stretch. Eyeing the clock, she was shocked to see they had been talking for hours.

"I guess you're right." He stood and followed her through the hallway to the guest room. "I'll see you in the morning." Both stood staring awkwardly at one another, desperately trying to think of what they should say.

"Yeah, goodnight."

"Goodnight." He stood silently watching her walk to her room before turning to close the door.

The next morning, Sloane awoke to the sun streaming through her window. Slowly she opened one eye and then the other. She felt so relaxed and it felt good to lie in bed with no cares in the world. As she rolled over to look at the clock, she shot straight up in bed when she realized what time it was. 9 a.m.

"Oh no!" Jumping from the bed, she ran down the hallway and threw the door to the nursery open. "I'm sorry baby, mommy overslept and I know you're so...Brayden?" Finding his crib empty, she turned on her heel exiting the room and was. .h.i.t with the glorious smell of food floating on the air.

Walking into the kitchen slowly, she felt her stomach rumble. She came around the corner and stood with her mouth open as she saw Brayden sitting in his high chair with a piece of banana squished between his fingers, part of it on his face. He was busy trying to get the rest of it in his mouth and Sloane could barely contain herself watching him. "Gates?"

"Oh, good, you're up. You hungry?" She looked to see Gates holding a spatula in one hand and turning the heat up on the stove. He winked at her and turned back to what he was doing.

"Uh, yes, I guess. I'm sorry my alarm didn't go off." Jumping up so quickly to check on Brayden, she'd forgotten about Gates being there and she cursed inwardly for wearing her old college t-shirt and a pair of athletic shorts to bed. She glanced at Gates' back turned to her and tried to smooth out the wrinkles in her shirt before sitting down beside Brayden. She noticed Gates was dressed in a pair of black track pants and the grey t-shirt he wore fit him like it was tailor made. She thought about the women he must be used to waking up to and that no doubt, Allie Gentry would never be caught dead in an outfit like she was wearing. She chewed on the inside of her lip and sighed, resigning herself to the fact she'd never be as glamorous as any of the women he was probably used to by now.

"Oh yeah, I turned it off this morning when I got up."

"You did?" He nodded and she sat with her mouth agape, feeling her insides turn to jelly. He had the d.a.m.nedest way of making her bones turn to mush with a glance. She cringed thinking how horrible she probably looked when he came into her room to turn off the alarm.

"I got up early and went for a run. When I got back, Brayden was playing in his crib. So I turned your alarm off and made breakfast. You looked like you could use the extra hour, so..."

"Wow, thanks." So this is what it is like to have a two-parent family. She giggled continuing to watch Brayden make a mess. "It looks and smells like you still have a few tricks up your sleeve." She was pretty impressed with Gates. His entire life people jumped whenever he said to or whenever his father wanted something for him. But somehow he'd still managed to impress her with doing things that seemed extraordinarily normal, like cooking her breakfast.

"A few. Now here, eat and I'll take care of getting this little guy cleaned up." He placed the most delectable omelet she'd ever seen or smelled and fresh fruit in front of her. Then he picked up Brayden, who was reaching for him.

"Yes, sir." Brayden was clearly enamored with his father and it was evident Gates was equally devoted to him. As she started to eat, she could hear Gates talking to Brayden and the faint giggles of the little boy as he carried him to his room.

"So, how'd the weekend go?" Gates glanced up to see Evan waltzing into his office on Monday morning.

"It went well." Gates thought of the time he'd spent with Brayden. It was almost like he'd never been away from the little boy and they grew close in a matter of days. He was such a proud father and it made him even more proud witnessing Brayden's first steps.

After they spent the day taking him to the aquarium, on a tour of a battleship and to the beach, Brayden fell asleep on the way home. Once his nap was over though, he'd been like a runaway locomotive for the rest of the evening. During an impromptu game of Gates being 'the monster', Brayden managed to pull himself up standing near the sofa. When Gates surprised him, Brayden ran into his mother's arms only a few feet away. It shocked both Sloane and Gates. For the rest of the evening they sat only a few feet away from each other, on the floor, coaching Brayden to walk back and forth between them.

"He's walking now."

"What? When did that happen?" Evan took a seat in one of the chairs across from Gates and smiled at the happiness in his best friend's face.

"Sat.u.r.day. He stood up and took off. He literally ran before he walked, but he's walking. He's still a little wobbly, but he's getting the hang of it."

"Well, congratulations Dad."

"Thanks. He's quite an amazing little kid." Gates felt an overabundance of pride at the sound of Evan calling him dad. It was one of the best feelings he'd ever felt watching his son go from crawling to walking.

"Sounds like it. It also sounds like you got to spend some good quality time together."

"Yes, he's a busy little guy. His birthday's coming up and I told Sloane I wanted to do something great for him. The only problem is we are closing the Paxon deal that same week."

"Don't worry, we'll figure something out. But I was referring to you and Sloane. You two got to spend some time together too, right?"

"We spent all our time with Brayden."

"So, you two didn't talk or anything?" Evan probed.

"Evan, stop. I know where you're going with this." He knew what Evan was up to with all of the questions, but he had no clue if Sloane still felt the same way about him anymore and he wasn't about to risk being made a fool of again. It wasn't like he hadn't thought about Sloane. He hadn't thought about much else. She was absolutely beautiful and it was amazing how good she could make even a simple t-shirt and a pair of shorts look without even trying. The vision of those dark curly locks carelessly tousled across her shoulders and the love in her eyes when she stared at Brayden took his breath away.

"Gates, come on. You and I both know you still have feelings for Sloane. That's how all of this started in the first place."

"Evan, a lot has happened in a short amount of time and I'm sure the feelings aren't there for Sloane anymore." In a way, Gates hoped she did still have some feelings for him, but he figured it was a long shot; especially after all they'd been through. "She's focused on Brayden. She even said that a couple of times, so why go there?"

"Gates, seriously, the two of you need to face it. You can't get away from each other. It's time for one of you to make a move."

"Well, if anyone makes a move, it'll be Sloane. With the way things have gone in the past and me taking her to court over Brayden, I'm pretty sure she doesn't want that anymore. I'm only Brayden's father."

"I personally think you're wrong. Yes, there may be some hurt feelings but if you got a chance to really talk then you'd see that you belong together."

"So, what happened?" Sloane looked up to see Liyah walk into her office and plop down in the chair in front of her. "How was Gates' visit?"

"It was good. He got to spend a lot of time with Brayden and we took him to the beach and the aquarium and he really had a lot of fun. You should've seen Brayden's eyes when he saw the water at the beach, it was like-"

"Sloane, great, he had fun with Brayden and Brayden had fun with him. I want to know if Gates had fun with you?"

"You're so basic. Do you ever think of anything else besides that?" Sloane grimaced and stood up to file one of the folders on her desk. She was trying her best to keep her mind off of Gates, but it was getting harder and harder and Liyah wasn't helping the situation. It was hard to keep anything else on her mind the entire weekend. Especially when she'd walked out of her room one night to run into him in the hallway with nothing but a towel on after his shower. His hair was damp and her eyes seemed to zero in on his chest and the way the water droplets seem to trickle down the ridges of his stomach to disappear into the terrycloth. The smooth skin on his chest and the way his muscles rippled underneath awakened sensations in her body she hadn't felt in over a year. She quickly made her way past him to get a gla.s.s of water.

"Of course, but I can't imagine why you would think of anything else when you had that gorgeous man in your house all weekend. You've been there and done that. You aren't the least bit curious as to what it would be like to be with him again?" Liyah leaned over and grinned at Sloane.

"Liyah, Gates was here to spend time with Brayden. What did you want me to do, parade around in my underwear to seduce him? The way you put it, I should be trying to get him in bed from the time he hits the doorway."

"Whatever works, honey."

"Sick mind." She hated to admit it, but she'd desperately fought her attraction to Gates the entire weekend. He had the most intense eyes and he still kept himself in impeccable shape. Admittedly, she'd had the same ideas about Gates that Liyah did from the time he appeared in her doorway that Friday. In all actuality, it was the only thing she continuously thought about.

"Come on Sloane. You two have history and the chemistry is still there. Why can't you admit it?"

"Liyah, regardless of if I still have feelings for Gates, which I have admitted to, I'm pretty sure he doesn't feel the same. He couldn't after what I've done. I kept his son from him for almost a year. Even though we're civil to one another, I'm pretty sure he doesn't trust me, nor want me back in his bed." Sitting at her desk, Sloane glanced at her monitor before looking at Liyah.

"You sure about that?"

"Yes, I'm pretty sure. So can we drop this?"

Sighing, Liyah shrugged. "Fine, but I don't think you should give up on something you don't know for certain. All jokes aside, this could be the opportunity for you to give Brayden the family you've always wanted him to have. Wouldn't it be terrible to get this far and not push it to the next level because you aren't sure if it would work? You've done that before and now look at how things are turning around." Liyah stood and walked across the room to the door, pausing to look at Sloane.

"Well, I guess we'll never know, because I'm not trying to make a fool of myself. Right now things are going well with Gates visiting and spending time with Brayden. I don't want to do anything to mess with it."

"I still can't believe he did all of this." Liyah repeated the same sentence over and over again standing in Sloane's backyard. The entire area was now the street scene from Sesame Street for Brayden's first birthday. Sloane planned on making sure all of the decorations were a Sesame Street theme because of Brayden's love of Elmo. Of course, once Gates got wind it was his favorite he'd taken it upon himself to go all out for the party. "So what time will he be here?" Liyah asked.

Still in awe of the amount of decorations and the things that had been set up in her backyard, Sloane smiled. There was no end to how much Gates would do for Brayden. It made her feel good knowing the little boy would know the man loved him more than his own life.

"He said around three. He's been in Seattle all week trying to tie up a deal and he was going to get out of there as soon as he could. He called to make sure everything had been delivered though." Sloane busied herself with some last minute details as she thought about Gates. She really hoped he would be able to be there for their son's birthday, but it wasn't looking good. Maybe she was making a mistake to think things had changed. Gates was still the CEO of a huge company and there were always going to be more important things. Her thinking Brayden was going to come first with him, just because he was his son was probably a mistake.

"This is too much. He's really getting into this Dad thing isn't he?"

"He's really good with Brayden and Brayden adores him."

"You adore him too, don't you?"

"Stop it, Liyah. Gates and I are co-parenting Brayden and that's it." She didn't want to even entertain any thoughts of them reuniting. As it stood he was already running late and she couldn't bear the thought of her having to explain to her son why daddy wasn't showing up for events. She knew right now Brayden wouldn't understand. He was too young, but she didn't want a life of those same disappointments peppering his memories as he grew.

"Whatever you say, Sloane. I think both of you are denying what's really between you."

"Liyah, I told you before. Gates isn't thinking about me like that. He's focused on Brayden and what's best for him and giving him a great life. I left Gates. I betrayed his trust and I'm pretty sure he isn't over that."

"Oh, come on. Look around you. Do you see all the things this man is doing to make his son happy? It's not just for Brayden. A lot of it has to do with you. He still loves you and he wants to make sure both of you are happy."

"Liyah-"

"Sloane, don't count out the possibility. Think about what I said."

"Whatever, let's get this stuff finished before everyone gets here okay?" Sloane tried to get her mind back on the snacks and goodie bags for the party. She was a little disappointed her aunt wasn't going to make the party. Unfortunately, she was battling the flu and she didn't have the energy to get out of bed. It wouldn't be the same without her there, but Sloane understood. She invited a whole host of people. Co-workers with children and of course, Liyah, Chase and Hannah, but the guest she was truly looking forward to seeing was Gates. She had to admit she was excited about the possibilities of them growing closer as they raised Brayden. As soon as Chase and Hannah arrived, they helped her and Liyah finish goodie bags and kept Brayden occupied. It wasn't going to be too long before guests would arrive and Sloane was getting a little worried Gates wouldn't be there. She wanted him to be able to see Brayden's face when he entered his very own Sesame Street.

"He'll be here." Liyah chirped when Sloane glanced at her watch.

"I should've known he wouldn't show. I guess some things don't change." She frowned, thinking that she was right. He was going to do to Brayden exactly what he'd done to her.

"He was in Seattle right? That's a long flight and you never know, he may have been delayed. I'm sure he'll be here. Right?" Liyah nudged Chase and shrugged her shoulder towards Sloane.

"Yes, of course. I'm sure he's on his way."

"Thanks guys, but you don't have to make any excuses for Gates, okay. He's busy. I'm used to the routine." She left them to finish up while she went to greet the arriving guests.

"I guess it isn't a surprise he isn't here." Hannah watched Sloane greeting the guests and their children, who were already a bundle of energy, coming in the house.

"Give the guy a break. I'm sure he's on his way. This is new to him."

"Wow, Chase, never thought you'd be on his side." Hannah looked at her boyfriend sideways.