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WISE. You may easily guess what he meant. He meant he would turn informer,[40] and so either weary out those that she loved from meeting together to worship G.o.d, or make them pay dearly for their so doing, the which, if he did, he knew it would vex every vein of her tender heart.
ATTEN. But do you think Mr. Badman would have been so base?
WISE. Truly he had malice and enmity enough in his heart to do it, only he was a tradesman; also he knew that he must live by his neighbours, and so he had that little wit in his anger, that he refrained himself and did it not. But, as I said, he had malice and envy enough in his heart to have made him to do it, only he thought it would worst him in his trade; yet these three things he would be doing: 1. He would be putting of others on to molest and abuse her friends. 2. He would be glad when he heard that any mischief befel them. 3. And would laugh at her when he saw her troubled for them. And now I have told you Mr. Badman's way as to this.
ATTEN. But was he not afraid of the judgments of G.o.d that did fly about at that time?
WISE. He regarded not the judgment nor mercy of G.o.d, for had he at all done that he could not have done as he did. But what judgments do you mean?
ATTEN. Such judgments, that if Mr. Badman himself had taken but sober notice of, they might have made him a hung down his ears.
WISE. Why, have you heard of any such persons that the judgments of G.o.d have overtaken.
ATTEN. Yes, and so, I believe, have you too, though you make so strange about it.
WISE. I have so indeed, to my astonishment and wonder.
ATTEN. Pray, therefore, if you please, tell me what it is, as to this, that you know; and then, perhaps, I may also say something to you of the same.
WISE. In our town there was one W. S., a man of a very wicked life; and he, when there seemed to be countenance given to it, would needs turn informer. Well, so he did, and was as diligent in his business as most of them could be; he would watch of nights, climb trees, and range the woods of days, if possible, to find out the meeters, for then they were forced to meet in the fields; yea, he would curse them bitterly, and swear most fearfully what he would do to them when he found them. Well, after he had gone on like a bedlam in his course awhile, and had done some mischiefs to the people, he was stricken by the hand of G.o.d, and that in this manner: 1. Although he had his tongue naturally at will, now he was taken with a flattering in his speech, and could not for weeks together speak otherwise than just like a man that was drunk.
2. Then he was taken with a drauling, or slabbering at his mouth, which slabber sometimes would hang at his mouth well nigh half-way down to the ground. 3. Then he had such a weakness in the back sinews of his neck, that ofttimes he could not look up before him, unless he clapped his hand hard upon his forehead, and held up his head that way, by strength of hand. 4. After this his speech went quite away, and he could speak no more than a swine or a bear. Therefore, like one of them, he would gruntle and make an ugly noise, according as he was offended, or pleased, or would have anything done, &c.
In this posture he continued for the s.p.a.ce of half a year or thereabouts, all the while otherwise well, and could go about his business, save once that he had a fall from the bell as it hangs in our steeple, which it was a wonder it did not kill him. But after that he also walked about, until G.o.d had made a sufficient spectacle of his judgment of his sin, and then on a sudden he was stricken, and died miserably; and so there was an end of him and his doings.
I will tell you of another. About four miles from St. Neots, there was a gentleman had a man, and he would needs be an informer, and a l.u.s.ty young man he was. Well, an informer he was, and did much distress some people, and had perfected his informations so effectually against some, that there was nothing further to do but for the constables to make distress on the people, that he might have the money or goods; and, as I heard, he hastened them much to do it. Now, while he was in the heat of his work, as he stood one day by the fire-side, he had, it should seem, a mind to a sop in the pan, for the spit was then at the fire, so he went to make him one; but behold, a dog, some say his own dog, took distaste at something, and bit his master by the leg; the which bite, notwithstanding all the means that was used to cure him, turned, as was said, to a gangrene; however, that wound was his death, and that a dreadful one too. For my relator said that he lay in such a condition by this bite, as the beginning, until his flesh rotted from off him before he went out of the world. But what need I instance in particular persons; when the judgment of G.o.d against this kind of people was made manifest, I think I may say, if not in all, yet in most of the counties in England where such poor creatures were. But I would, if it had been the will of G.o.d, that neither I nor anybody else, could tell you more of these stories; true stories, that are neither lie nor romance.
ATTEN. Well, I also heard of both these myself, and of more too, as remarkable in their kind as these, if I had any list to tell them; but let us leave those that are behind to others, or to the coming of Christ, who then will justify or condemn them, as the merit of their work shall require; or if they repented, and found mercy, I shall be glad when I know it, for I wish not a curse to the soul of mine enemy.
WISE. There can be no pleasure in the telling of such stories, though to hear of them may do us a pleasure. They may put us in mind that there is a G.o.d that judgeth in the earth, and that doth not always forget nor defer to hear the cry of the dest.i.tute; they also carry along with them both caution and counsel to those that are the survivors of such. Let us tremble at the judgments of G.o.d, and be afraid of sinning against him, and it shall be our protection. It shall go well with them that fear G.o.d, that fear before him.
ATTEN. Well, Sir, as you have intimated, so I think we have, in this place, spoken enough about these kind of men; if you please, let us return again to Mr. Badman himself, if you have any more to say of him.
WISE. More! we have yet scarce thoroughly begun with anything that we have said. All the particulars are in themselves so full of badness, that we have rather only looked in them, than indeed said anything to them; but we will pa.s.s them and proceed. You have heard of the sins of his youth, of his apprenticeship, and how he set up, and married, and what a life he hath led his wife; and now I will tell you some more of his pranks. He had the very knack for knavery; had he, as I said before, been bound to serve an apprenticeship to all these things, he could not have been more cunning, he could not have been more artificial at it.
ATTEN. Nor perhaps so artificially neither. For as none can teach goodness like to G.o.d himself, so, concerning sin and knavery, none can teach a man it like the devil, to whom, as I perceive, Mr. Badman went to school from his childhood to the end of his life. But, pray, Sir, make a beginning.
WISE. Well, so I will. You may remember that I told you what a condition he was in for money before he did marry, and how he got a rich wife, with whose money he paid his debts. How, when he had paid his debts, he having some money left, he sets up again as briskly as ever, keeps a great shop, drives a great trade, and runs again a great way into debt; but now not into the debt of one or two, but into the debt of many, so that at last he came to owe some thousands, and thus he went on a good while. And, to pursue his ends the better, he begun now to study to please all men, and to suit himself to any company; he could now be as they, say as they, that is, if he listed; and then he would list, when he perceived that by so doing he might either make them his customers or creditors for his commodities. If he dealt with honest men, as with some honest men he did, then he would be as they, talk as they, seem to be sober as they, talk of justice and religion as they, and against debauchery as they; yea, and would too seem to show a dislike of them that said, did, or were otherwise than honest.
Again, when he did light among those that were bad, then he would be as they, but yet more close and cautiously, except they were sure of his company. Then he would carry it openly, be as they, say, d.a.m.n them and sink them[41] as they. If they railed on good men, so could he; if they railed on religion, so could he; if they talked beastly, vainly, idly, so would he; if they were for drinking, swearing, whoring, or any the like villainies, so was he. This was now the path he trod in, and could do all artificially as any man alive. And now he thought himself a perfect man, he thought he was always a boy till now. What think you now of Mr.
Badman?
ATTEN. Think! why I think he was an atheist; for no man but an atheist can do this. I say it cannot be but that the man that is such as this Mr. Badman must be a rank and stinking atheist, for he that believes that there is either G.o.d or devil, heaven or h.e.l.l, or death and judgment after, cannot do as Mr. Badman did; I mean if he could do these things without reluctancy and check of conscience, yea, if he had not sorrow and remorse for such abominable sins as these.
WISE. Nay, he was so far off from reluctances and remorse of conscience for these things, that he counted them the excellency of his attainments, the quintessence of his wit, his rare and singular virtues, such as but few besides himself could be the masters of. Therefore, as for those that made boggle and stop at things, and that could not in conscience, and for fear of death and judgment, do such things as he, he would call them fools and noddies,[42] and charge them for being frighted with the talk of unseen bugbears, and would encourage them, if they would be men indeed, to labour after the attainment of this his excellent art.
He would oftentimes please himself with the thoughts of what he could do in this matter, saying within himself, I can be religious and irreligious, I can be anything or nothing; I can swear, and speak against swearing; I can lie, and speak against lying; I can drink, wench, be unclean, and defraud, and not be troubled for it.
Now I enjoy myself, and am master of mine own ways, and not they of me. This I have attained with much study, great care, and more pains. But this his talk should be only with himself, to his wife, who he knew durst not divulge it, or among his intimates, to whom he knew he might say any thing.
ATTEN. Did I call him before an atheist? I may call him now a devil, or a man possessed with one, if not with many. I think that there cannot be found in every corner such a one as this. True, it is said of king Ahaz that he sinned more and more (2 Chron 28:22). And of Ahab, that he sold 'himself to work wickedness'
(1 Kings 21:25). And of the men of Sodom, that they 'were sinners before the Lord exceedingly' (Gen 13:13).
WISE. An atheist he was no doubt, if there be such a thing as an atheist in the world; but for all his brags of perfection and security in his wickedness, I believe that at times G.o.d did let down fire from heaven into his conscience (Job 21:17). True, I believe he would quickly put it out again, and grow more wicked and desperate afterward, but this also turned to his destruction, as afterward you may hear.
But I am not of your mind to think that there are but few such in the world, except you mean as to the degree of wickedness unto which he had attained. For otherwise, no doubt, there is abundance of such as he; men of the same mind, of the same principles, and of the same conscience too, to put them into practice. Yea, I believe that there are many that are endeavouring to attain to the same pitch of wickedness, and all them are such as he in the judgment of the law, nor will their want of h.e.l.lish wit to attain thereto excuse them at the day of judgment. You know that in all science some are more arch than some, and so it is in the art as well as in the practice of wickedness, some are two-fold and some seven-fold more the children of h.e.l.l than others--and yet all the children of h.e.l.l--else they would all be masters, and none scholars in the school of wickedness. But there must be masters, and there must be learners; Mr. Badman was a master in this art, and therefore it follows that he must be an arch and chief one in that mystery.
ATTEN. You are in the right, for I perceive that some men, though they desire it, are not so arch in the practice thereof as others, but are, as I suppose they call them, fools and dunces to the rest, their heads and capacities will not serve them to act and do so wickedly. But Mr. Badman wanted not a wicked head to contrive, as well as a wicked heart to do his wickedness.
WISE. True, but yet I say such men shall at the day of judgment be judged, not only for what they are, but also for what they would be. For if 'the thought of foolishness is sin,' doubtless the desire of foolishness is more sin; and if the desire be more, the endeavour after it must needs be more and more (Psa 24:9). He then that is not an artificial atheist and transgressor, yet if he desires to be so, if he endeavoureth to be so, he shall be judged and condemned to h.e.l.l for such a one. For the law judgeth men, as I said, according to what they would be. He that 'looketh on a woman to l.u.s.t after her, hath committed adultery with her already in his heart' (Matt 5:28). By the same rule, he that would steal doth steal he that would cheat, doth cheat; he that would swear, doth swear; and he that would commit adultery, doth do so. For G.o.d judgeth men according to the working of their minds, and saith, 'As he thinketh, so is he' (Prov 23:7). That is, so is he in his heart, in his intentions, in his desires, in his endeavours; and G.o.d's law, I say, lays hold of the desires, intentions, and endeavours, even as it lays hold of the act of wickedness itself (Matt 5; Rom 7:7). A man then that desires to be as bad as Mr.
Badman, and desires to be so wicked have many in their hearts, though he never attains to that proficiency in wickedness as he, shall be judged for as bad a man as he, because it was in his desires to be such a wicked one.
ATTEN. But this height of wickedness in Mr. Badman will not yet out of my mind. This hard, desperate, or, what shall I call it, diabolical frame of heart, was in him a foundation, a ground-work to all acts and deeds that were evil.
WISE. The heart, and the desperate wickedness of it, is the foundation and ground-work of all. Atheism, professed and practical, spring both out of the heart, yea, and all manner of evil besides. For they be not bad deeds that make a bad man, but he is already a bad man that doth bad deeds. A man must be wicked before he can do wickedness. 'Wickedness proceedeth form the wicked' (1 Sam 24:13). It is an evil tree that bars evil fruit. Men gather no grapes of thorns; the heart therefore must be evil before the man can do evil, and good before the man doth good (Matt 7:16-18).
ATTEN. Now I see the reason why Mr. Badman was so base as to get a wife by dissimulation, and to abuse her so like a villain when he had got her, it was because he was before, by a wicked heart, prepared to act wickedness.
WISE. You may be sure of it, 'For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: all these things come from within and defile the man' (Mark 7:20-23). And a man, as his naughty mind inclines him, makes use of these, or any of these, to gratify his l.u.s.t, to promote his designs, to revenge his malice, to enrich, or to wallow himself in the foolish pleasures and pastimes of this life. And all these did Mr. Badman do, even to the utmost, if either opportunity, or purse, or perfidiousness, would help him to the obtaining of his purpose.
ATTEN. Purse! why he could not but have purse to do almost what he would, having married a wife with so much money.
WISE. Hold you there; some of Mr. Badman's sins were costly, as his drinking, and whoring, and keeping other bad company; though he was a man that had ways too many to get money, as well as ways too many to spend it.
ATTEN. Had he then such a good trade, for all he was such a bad man? Or was his calling so gainful to him as always to keep his purse's belly full, though he was himself a great spender?
WISE. No, it was not his trade that did it, though he had a pretty trade too. He had another way to get money, and that by hatfuls and pocketfuls at a time.
ATTEN. Why I trow he was no highwayman, was he?
WISE. I will be sparing in my speech as to that, though some have muttered as if he could ride out now and then, about n.o.body but himself knew what, over night, and come home all dirty and weary next morning. But that is not the thing I aim at.
ATTEN. Pray let me know it, if you think it convenient that I should.
CHAPTER VIII.
[BADMAN IS A BANKRUPT, AND GETS BY IT 'HATFULS OF MONEY.']
WISE. I will tell you; it was this, he had an art to break, and get hatfuls of money by breaking.
ATTEN. But what do you mean by Mr. Badman's breaking? You speak mystically, do you not?
WISE. No, no, I speak plainly. Or, if you will have it in plainer language, it is this;--when Mr. Badman had swaggered and wh.o.r.ed away most of his wife's portion, he began to feel that he could not much longer stand upon his legs in this course of life and keep up his trade and repute--such as he had--in the world, but by the new engine of breaking. Wherefore upon a time he gives a great and sudden rush into several men's debts, to the value of about four or five thousand pounds, driving at the same time a very great trade, by selling many things for less than they cost him, to get him custom, therewith to blind his creditors' eyes.
His creditors therefore seeing that he had a great employ, and dreaming that it must needs at length turn to a very good account to them, trusted him freely without mistrust, and so did others too, to the value of what was mentioned before. Well, when Mr.
Badman had well feathered his nest with other men's goods and money, after a little time he breaks. And by and by it was noised abroad that Mr. Badman had shut up shop, was gone, and could trade no longer. Now by that time his breaking was come to his creditors' ears, he had by craft and knavery made so sure of what he had, that his creditors could not touch a penny. Well, when he had done, he sends his mournful sugared letters to his creditors, to let them understand what had happened unto him, and desired them not to be severe with him, for he bore towards all men an honest mind, and would pay so far as he was able. Now he sends his letters by a man confederate with him, who could make both the worst and best of Mr. Badman's case; the best for Mr. Badman and the worst for his creditors. So when he comes to them he both bemoans them and condoles Mr. Badman's condition, telling of them that, without a speedy bringing of things to a conclusion, Mr. Badman would be able to make them no satisfaction, but at present he both could and would, and that to the utmost of his power, and to that end he desired that they would come over to him. Well, his creditors appoint him a time and come over, and he, meanwhile, authorizes another to treat with them, but will not be seen himself, unless it was on a Sunday, lest they should snap him with a writ. So his deputed friend treats with them about their concern with Mr.
Badman, first telling them of the great care that Mr. Badman took to satisfy them and all men for whatsoever he owed, as far as in him lay, and how little he thought a while since to be in this low condition. He pleaded also the greatness of his charge, the greatness of taxes, the badness of the times, and the great losses that he had by many of his customers; some of which died in his debt, others were run away, and for many that were alive he never expected a farthing from them. Yet nevertheless he would show himself an honest man, and would pay as far as he was able; and if they were willing to come to terms, he would make a composition with them, for he was not able to pay them all. The creditors asked what he would give? It was replied, Half-a-crown in the pound.
At this they began to huff, and he to renew his complaint and entreaty, but the creditors would not hear, and so for that time their meeting without success broke up. But after his creditors were in cool blood, and admitting of second thoughts, and fearing lest delays should make them lose all, they admit of a second debate, come together again, and, by many worlds and great ado, they obtained five shillings in the pound. So the money was produced, releases and discharges drawn, signed, and sealed, books crossed, and all things confirmed; and then Mr. Badman can put his head out a doors again, and be a better man than when he shut up shop, by several thousands of pounds.[43]