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She guffawed, and then she almost groaned when she saw Bobby Strong waiting on their front porch. He had been so afraid of what might happen to her, he had refused to come to the air show. There were things she had to reckon with there, but she never had the courage, and he never wanted to hear it. He didn't want to believe how much flying meant to her, how badly she wanted other things than being his wife and having babies. What she really wanted right now was to relive every moment of the air show with Nick and have him a.s.sure her that their time together wasn't over. But instead now she'd have to deal with Bobby.
"There's your friend," Nick said quietly. "You gonna marry him one of these days?" It was something he always wondered.
"I don't know," she said honestly with a sigh. She was always honest with him. But her honest answers were not what Bobby wanted. She was nineteen years old and she didn't feel ready to tie herself to anyone, and yet it was what they all wanted for her. "Everyone keeps telling me I'll change, that being married and having kids changes everything. I guess that's what I'm scared of. My mom says it's what all women want. So how come all I want is what I had today and a hangar full of airplanes?"
"I can't say I've ever felt any different," he grinned, and then grew thoughtful. "No, that's not true. I did feel differently when I was about your age. I tried like h.e.l.l, but it didn't work. And I've been scared to death ever since. There's no room for both a family and planes in my life. But, Ca.s.sie, maybe you're different." In a way he wanted her to be, but not for Bobby.
"My dad seemed to do okay at it," she grinned back at him. "Maybe we're both weird, you and I. Maybe we're both just cowards. Sometimes it's easier to love airplanes than people." Except that she knew she loved him. He was the dearest friend she had, and she knew he had loved her since she was a child. The trouble was, she wasn't a child now.
"You know," he nodded thoughtfully then, responding to her calling herself a coward, "that's exactly what I said to myself today when I watched you do that triple loop followed by the inverted spin before you flipped into the barrel roll in the aerobatics race. I said to myself, gee, I never realized Ca.s.sie is a coward." She burst into laughter at the expression on his face, and pushed him where he sat behind the wheel in his old truck.
"You know what I mean. Maybe we're cowards about people," she said cautiously.
"Maybe we're just not stupid. I think being married to the wrong person is about as bad as it gets. Believe me, I tried it."
"Are you telling me he's the wrong person for me?" Ca.s.sie asked him in an undertone as Bobby waited for her patiently on the porch. He had already heard that she'd been a two-time winner at the air show.
"I can't tell you that, Ca.s.s. Only you know that. But don't let anyone else tell you he's the right one either. You figure it out. If you don't, you'll be awfully sorry later." She nodded at the unexpected wisdom of his words, and then hugged him again for all he'd done for her.
"I'll see you at work tomorrow." She was going to be working at the airport all summer. Her father was going to let her quit her job at the restaurant and work for him, for a pittance. She wondered if her father would let her do cargo runs alone. She wondered if her performance in the air show was going to change things.
She hopped lightly out of the truck, with a last look at Nick, and then went to talk to Bobby. He had waited a long time for her, and he was pleased that she had won, but he looked annoyed as she hurried over. He had been worried sick all afternoon, working in his father's store, and terrified he would hear of a disaster at the air show. And now she looked as breezy as could be, as though she'd gone into town to go shopping with her sisters.
"It's not fair to me, Ca.s.s," he said quietly. "I was worried about you all afternoon. You don't know what it's like, thinking of all the horrible things that could happen."
"I'm sorry, Bobby," she said quietly, "but it was a special day for me."
"I know," he nodded, but he didn't look pleased. None of her sisters flew, what was she trying to prove? He really didn't want her to keep on flying, and he said so. But now was not the time, and Ca.s.sie suddenly looked as angry as he did.
"How can you say that to me?" She had come too far now, the air show, her father, all those years of lessons with Nick. She wasn't coming down ever again now. She was up there. And she was staying, whether Bobby liked it or not. He figured that eventually he'd change her. But by the end of the summer he had come to understand that he had allied himself with a family of fliers, and blood ran thicker than engagements. For the moment, all he could do was ask her to be careful. And she was, of course, but not because of Bobby. She was just good at what she did. And she flew constantly. By fall, when Jackie Cochran won the Bendix Trophy race from Burbank to Cleveland, Ca.s.sie was starting to fly mail runs for her father. He was sure of her flying by then, and had had her fly him all over the state herself. He had finally admitted to Nick that he was right. It was a coincidence of course, and you couldn't really trust a female the way you could a male, but she was a d.a.m.n good pilot. Of course, Pat never said as much to Ca.s.sie.
She stayed on at Bradley for her soph.o.m.ore year, and worked at the airport all through the winter. She helped out on several emergencies, flew with Nick whenever she could, and by spring she was an accepted member of the team at the airport. She flew everywhere, short runs, long, and of course she was practicing again for the summer air show. She went out to practice sometimes with Nick, and their time together reminded her of their years of lessons. But now they had time to talk at the airport, while they worked, and more than once, she joined him flying cargo or mail runs.
She was still engaged to Bobby Strong, but his father had been sick all year, and he had more responsibilities at the store now. He seemed to be visiting Ca.s.sie less and less often. And she was so busy, sometimes she didn't even notice.
Hitler occupied the rest of Czechoslovakia in March, and became more of a threat than ever. Once again, there was talk of war, and fear of an American involvement. Roosevelt continued to promise that it wouldn't happen this time. And Nick continued not to believe him.
When Charles Lindbergh returned from Europe in the spring of 1939, he was the most outspoken champion of America staying out of the war. And Pat was glad to hear it. He believed whatever the famed aviator had to say. To Pat O'Malley, the name of Lindbergh was still sacred.
"We don't belong in the next one, Nick. We learned our lesson in the last one." Pat was adamant. He was sure the United States would never get pulled into another war in Europe. But there was already trouble between the Chinese and the j.a.panese. Mussolini had taken Albania. And Hitler seemed to be looking toward Poland.
But all Ca.s.sie could think of by then was the summer air show. She was hard at work learning rolls and turns, and some new aerobatics she'd seen at a small airstrip in Ohio where she'd gone with Nick. She was working on her speed, and practicing whenever she could spare the time. By June, she had finished her soph.o.m.ore year, and she thought she was ready for the air show.
Bobby was annoyed about her partic.i.p.ating in the air show again, but he had his own problems at the grocery store, and he had long since understood how impossible Ca.s.sie was about flying. They went to see the new Tarzan movie when it came out in June, and it was the only respite they shared as she prepared for the air show.
Finally, at long last, the big day came, and Ca.s.sie was at the airstrip in Peoria with Nick at four o'clock in the morning. Her brother was coming in later with Pat, but he wasn't particularly enthused about flying in the show this year. He had been so excited about starting college at Western Illinois University at Macomb that he had hardly practiced. Pat was still pinning all his hopes on him, and despite Ca.s.sie's impressive wins the year before, he scarcely ever mentioned her entering the air show.
Nick helped her fuel the plane and check everything, and at six o'clock he took her out for breakfast.
"Relax," he smiled at her, remembering how he himself had been the first time he'd flown in an exhibition show, after the war. Pat had gone with him and Oona had brought the kids to to see him. Ca.s.sie had been there too of course, she was only two then. And remembering that suddenly made him feel old. The two had become so close since he had started teaching her to fly years before. They had developed a bond that they would never lose now. But the painful thing for him sometimes was forcing himself to remember that he was old enough to be her father. She was twenty now, and there were eighteen years between them. He still felt like a kid, and he looked far younger than his years, and Ca.s.sie accused him constantly of acting like a child. But the fact was, he was thirty-eight... and she was only twenty. He would have given anything to cut in half the difference between them. Not that she seemed see him. Ca.s.sie had been there too of course, she was only two then. And remembering that suddenly made him feel old. The two had become so close since he had started teaching her to fly years before. They had developed a bond that they would never lose now. But the painful thing for him sometimes was forcing himself to remember that he was old enough to be her father. She was twenty now, and there were eighteen years between them. He still felt like a kid, and he looked far younger than his years, and Ca.s.sie accused him constantly of acting like a child. But the fact was, he was thirty-eight... and she was only twenty. He would have given anything to cut in half the difference between them. Not that she seemed to to care. But he did. But then again, she was still the daughter of his closest friend, and nothing would ever change that. Pat would never have understood the bond or the closeness between them. Nick knew it was a hurdle they would never overcome, unlike her flying. Pat had gone that far, but he would go no further. care. But he did. But then again, she was still the daughter of his closest friend, and nothing would ever change that. Pat would never have understood the bond or the closeness between them. Nick knew it was a hurdle they would never overcome, unlike her flying. Pat had gone that far, but he would go no further.
Nick ordered her a plate of eggs, some sausages, a side of toast, and a cup of black coffee. But she waved it away as soon as it appeared at the table.
"I can't, Nick. I'm not hungry."
"Eat it anyway. You'll need it later. I know what I'm talking about, kid. Otherwise, you're going to go weak in the knees when you're doing loops and negative G's out there. Be a good girl and eat it, or I'll have to force it down your throat, and the waitress might not understand it." He looked at her in a way that said how much he cared, and she grinned up at him happily.
"You're disgusting."
"You're cute. Especially when you take first prize. I like that in a girl. In fact, I'm kind of counting on you to do that."
"Be nice. Don't push. I'll do what I can." But she wanted to win first prize too, maybe even several of them. For him, for herself, and more importantly, to impress her father.
"He loves you anyway, you know. He just can't stand admitting he was wrong. But he knows how good you are. I heard him tell a bunch of guys at the airport last week. He just doesn't want to tell you, that's all." Nick understood him better than Ca.s.s did. For all his gruff ways and seeming outrage over women fliers, her father was desperately proud of her, and just as embarra.s.sed to show it.
"Maybe if I stacked a bunch of prizes up today, he'd have to admit, finally, that I fly okay... to me, I mean, not just to a bunch of guys." She still sounded angry when she talked about it sometimes. Her father was always bragging about Chris, who didn't even like to fly. It drove her crazy.
"Would it really make that much difference to hear the words?" Nick asked her, eating fried eggs and steak with her. He wasn't going to be doing loops, but he had ordered himself a healthy breakfast.
"Maybe. I'd like to hear them just for the h.e.l.l of it. Just to see how it feels."
"And then what?"
"I go back to flying for you, and him, and myself, no big deal, I guess."
"And you finish college and become a teacher." He liked to say the words, but they both knew that she didn't believe that.
"I'd rather teach flying like you," she said honestly, taking a sip of hot coffee.
"Yeah, and fly mail runs. That's a great life for a college girl"
"Don't be so impressed. I haven't learned a thing, except from you." And she meant it. But they were interrupted before he could deflect her praise, by a group of young men who had just finished breakfast. They seemed to hesitate somewhere near their table, circling like young birds, glancing at Nick and eyeing Ca.s.sie.
"You know those guys?" Nick asked in an undervoice, and she shook her head. She had never seen them, and then finally one of them approached Ca.s.sie's table. He looked down at her, and then at Nick, and he looked suddenly very young as he got up the nerve to address them.
"Are you... Stick Calvin?" he asked hesitantly, and then he glanced at her, "And Ca.s.sie O'Malley?"
"I am," she answered before Nick did.
"I'm Billy Nolan. I'm from California... we're flying in the air show. I saw you there last year," he blushed furiously, "you were terrific." He looked about fourteen and Nick almost groaned. He was actually twenty-four, but he didn't look it. He was blond and young, his hair stood up in a cowlick like a kid's, and his face was covered with freckles. "My dad knew who you were," he said to Nick. "He flew in the 94th with you, he got shot down. You probably don't remember him... Tommy Nolan."
"Oh, my G.o.d," Nick grinned as he stuck out his hand, and invited Billy to sit down with them. "How is he?"
"Pretty good. He's had a bad limp since the war, but it doesn't seem to bother him much. We have a shoe store in San Francisco."
"Good for him. Does he fly anymore?" Nick remembered him well, and the funny thing was that Billy looked just like him.
But Billy said he hadn't flown in years, and he was none too thrilled that Billy had caught the bug from him. His friends were standing watching him then, and Billy beckoned them over. There were four of them, all about his age, and all from various parts of California. For the most part, they looked like cowboys.
"Which races are you in?" they asked Ca.s.s, and she told them. Speed, aerobatics, and a number of others, which Nick thought was a little ambitious. But it meant so much to her, and she loved being in the air show so much, he hadn't wanted to dampen her spirits. She had waited a long time for this, and she really enjoyed it.
Billy introduced them to everyone, they were a nice bunch of guys, and for the second time that morning, Nick Calvin felt ancient. Most of the boys were fifteen years younger than he was. They were all closer to Ca.s.sie's age, and by the time they all left the restaurant, everyone was laughing and chatting, and talking about the air show. They were like a bunch of kids, going to the school fair, and having a great time.
"I ought to let you kids go play," Nick grinned at them, "but then again maybe Ca.s.sie might forget to fly. Maybe I'd better stick around to sec that you all behave and remember the air show." They all laughed at him, and most of them had a thousand questions about the 94th and the war, and the Germans he had shot down before it ended. "Hey, hold on a minute, guys... one at a time," and he told them another story. They treated him like a hero, and they were all in high spirits when they got to the fairground. This was what flying was all about, the camaraderie, and the fun, and the people you met at times like this, the experiences you shared. It wasn't just about the long flights and the solitude, and the sky at night when you felt as though you owned the world. It was all of those things, the highs and the lows, the terror and the peace of it, the incredible contrasts.
They wished Ca.s.sie luck, and went off to check their plane. They were all taking turns flying it, and they were enrolled in different events. But only Billy was going to be flying against Ca.s.sie.
"He's nice," she said easily, once they were gone, and Nick glanced at her over his shoulder.
"Don't forget you're engaged," he said politely, and she laughed at the pious look on his face, which was very unlike him. Most of the time he had no interest at all in Bobby Strong, or her fidelity to him.
"Oh for heaven's sake. I just meant he was 'nice,' you know, as someone to talk to. I wasn't planning to run off with him." She was fueling the plane, and wondered suddenly if Nick could be jealous. It was a ridiculous idea, and she brushed it off as soon as she thought it.
"You could run off with him, you know," he persisted. "He's the right age. And at least he flies. That might be refreshing," he said innocently.
"Are you finding guys for me now?" She looked amused. "I didn't know that was part of the service you provided," she said calmly.
'The service I will provide will be to chain you to the ground if you don't prepare your plane right. Don't fool around, Ca.s.s. You're going to be putting a lot of stress on the plane, and yourself. Ray attention."
"Yes, sir." The games were over now, but for a fraction of an instant, she could have swom that he was jealous, although he certainly had no reason to be. She was engaged to someone else, and they were just friends, and always had been. She wondered if it annoyed him to see her making friends with other pilots. He was very proud of all she'd done, and maybe that was what had been bothering him. It was hard to tell as he helped her check the plane. And then a few minutes later they saw her father and her brother. It was nearly eight o'clock by then. And the races started at nine. Although her first event wasn't until nine-thirty.
"All set, Ca.s.s?" her father asked nervously. "Did you check everything?"
"I did," she said defensively. Didn't he think she was capable of doing it? And if he cared so much, why hadn't he come out to help her, instead of Chris? He could have been attentive to both of them, but he wasn't. All his concern was for Chris, who looked more than anything as though he wished he didn't have to be there. He was in only one event this year, and Ca.s.sie hoped for his sake that he'd win it.
"Good luck," her father said quietly, and then left her to join Chris across the airfield.
"Why does he bother?" she muttered as he walked away, and Nick answered gently.
"Because he loves you, and he doesn't know how to say it."
"He has an odd way of showing it sometimes."
"Yeah? Maybe it's because you kept him up all night when you were born. Maybe you deserve it." She grinned at the answer he gave her. Nick always made her feel better about everything, and it was comforting to know that he'd always been there.
She saw Billy Nolan and the boys again before her first event. They were hooting and laughing and raising h.e.l.l. It was hard to believe they were serious, but they had entered all the toughest races.
"I hope they know what they're doing," Nick said quietly. They looked like a bunch of kids, but it was hard to tell sometimes. He had known some real aces who had looked like cowboys. But no one wanted to watch a tragedy, and that usually happened when people overestimated their skill, or didn't know their planes' limits.
"They must be okay," Ca.s.sie said confidently, "they qualified."
"So did you," he teased, "what does that mean?"
"Jerk..." she laughed at him, and half an hour later she was on her way. It was almost her turn. There had already been some pretty impressive stunts in the air, some great gasps, a few screams. It was all in a day's work at the air show.
"Give 'em h.e.l.l!" Nick called as he left her and she taxied off down the short runway in the Moth for the aerobatic event. And for the first time in years, he found himself praying. He hadn't been nearly as nervous for her last year, but this year he was afraid she might push too hard, just to prove something to him, or her father. She wanted to win more than anything, and he knew it.
She began with a few slow loops, then a double, and a barrel roll. She went through the whole repertoire backward and forward, including a Cuban eight, and a falling leaf, and as he watched her, each exercise was completed to perfection, and then she did a triple, and a dive, and somewhere near him a woman screamed, not realizing that in an instant, Ca.s.sie would recover... and of course she did. Perfectly. It was the most beautiful demonstration he had ever seen, and she finished it off with an outside loop, which delighted everyone. And Nick was beaming at her when she landed.
"Not bad for a start, Ca.s.s. Pretty clean." His eyes shone right into hers as he praised her.
"That's all?" Her excitement and adrenaline turned instantly to disappointment, but he gave her a tight hug and told her she'd been terrific. "You were the best," he said honestly, and half an hour later, the judges confirmed it. Her father congratulated her politely when their paths crossed. But his praise was more for Nick than for Ca.s.sie. He was proud of her. But it still irked him that she was showing up the men with her flying.
"You must have had a very good teacher."
"I had a very good student," Nick corrected him, and the two men smiled, but her father said nothing more to Ca.s.sie.
Chris's race was next, and he tried hard, but he lost. He didn't even place this time, and the truth was he didn't really care anymore. For him, his flying days were over. He was much more interested in his cla.s.ses at school, and all things separate from planes and airports. He just didn't have the bug, and the only thing he hated about it was disappointing his father.
"I'm sorry, Dad," he apologized after he parked the plane. "I guess I should have practiced more." He'd been flying Nick's beefed-up Bellanca, which Ca.s.sie was going to fly too.
"Yes, you should have, son," Pat said sadly. He hated to see him lose when, with a little effort, he could have been a great flier, or so Pat thought. But Pat was the only one who thought of Chris that way. Everyone else knew the truth, even Chris, that he just wasn't a flier. But Ca.s.sie congratulated him anyway.
"Good job, baby brother. That was a pretty piece of flying."
"Not pretty enough apparently," he grinned at her, and then congratulated her for taking first prize in the previous event.
And a few minutes later she saw one of Billy Nolan's friends take second place. He had done some very fine flying.
Ca.s.sie's next race was at ten o'clock and it was more difficult this time. It involved speed, and she was worried that the Vega couldn't do it. It was fast, but some of the racing planes were faster.
"She'll do it if you play her right," Nick promised as he talked to Ca.s.sie right before takeoff. The Vega was a great plane and Ca.s.sie flew it well. Nick knew that for this race it was better than the Bellanca. "Just keep cool, Ca.s.s. Don't let it scare you." She nodded and said not a word as she taxied off, and a moment later she was in the air, and flying remarkably. Nick had never seen anyone more precise or faster, and she managed some extraordinarily complicated maneuvers. He couldn't take his eyes off her, and he noticed that Pat was watching her intently too. And so was a tall blond man in a blazer and white trousers. He was watching her very carefully through binoculars, and talking to a man who was taking notes. He was out of place and Nick figured he was probably from one of the Chicago papers.
Ca.s.sie won second prize that time, but only because she hadn't had a faster plane. She had overcome every handicap the Vega had, and Nick still couldn't believe it. He had never expected her to win that race, and she had placed handsomely. When she was down again, Billy came over and congratulated her. He had won third against her. They were a great bunch of fliers, and Nick liked what he had just seen of Billy. He was careful and sure, and he had won in spite of an inferior plane. Like Ca.s.s, he had pushed it to the limit.
She had two more races to fly that day. One at noon, which went well, and the last one in the afternoon, which was a race Nick would have preferred she hadn't entered. She and Nick had had lunch with Billy Nolan and his friends, Chris had joined them eventually, and when her father wandered by, she introduced them to the famous Pat O'Malley. He liked all the young boys, and Billy spent some extra time talking to him, telling him about his father. Fat remembered him well, and was sorry he had lost track of him in the past twenty years. He had genuinely liked him.
And then it was time for Ca.s.sie's race. When Pat heard that she had entered, he was furious, and his eyes blazed as he berated his partner.
"Didn't you tell her not to?" he barked at Nick, who looked annoyed and unhappy at Pat's reaction. He felt guilty enough for letting her enter it and Pat wasn't helping.
"She takes after her old man, Pat. She does what she wants."
"She's got the wrong plane for that, and she doesn't have the experience to do it."
"I told her that. But she's practiced a lot, and I think she's smart enough to let it go if she can't make it. She's not going to push it to the edge, Pat. I told her that myself." He only prayed that she had listened.
The two men stood staring up at the sky unhappily, with Chris, and Billy and his friends, and the man in the white trousers. It was a daredevil event, usually entered only by old stunt pilots with aerobatic planes, which Nick's Bellanca wasn't. But she had desperately wanted to try her hand at this event. It allowed her to show off all the stuff she did best, and pull off a miracle or two, if she could get the plane to cooperate with her at low alt.i.tudes. She knew it it was going was going to to be scary, but she was prepared to scrub the race if she really had to. be scary, but she was prepared to scrub the race if she really had to.
There were over a dozen moves she had to do, all of them impressive and frightening, and she went through the first half dozen of them without being a hair off. Pat was even beginning to smile as he watched her. And then on the final dive, she seemed to to lose control. Her plane dove with its wings askew, and Nick wondered if she was panicking and had forgotten everything he had taught her, or maybe she had fainted. But she was doing absolutely nothing to save herself, nothing at all, and no one moved as they stared in horror at what was going to become a tragedy in a single instant. But suddenly, with a roar, she throttled the h.e.l.l out of it, and pulled up, barely higher than the heads of the horrified crowd, and pulled out of lose control. Her plane dove with its wings askew, and Nick wondered if she was panicking and had forgotten everything he had taught her, or maybe she had fainted. But she was doing absolutely nothing to save herself, nothing at all, and no one moved as they stared in horror at what was going to become a tragedy in a single instant. But suddenly, with a roar, she throttled the h.e.l.l out of it, and pulled up, barely higher than the heads of the horrified crowd, and pulled out of it it, soaring high and completing a triple roll that took everyone's breath away. She completed every move and did a final loop that won her the race hands down, without even hearing from the judges.
Nick had a lump in his throat the size of an egg and Pat looked gray, but as he realized what she'd done, Nick wanted to to throttle her for scaring him so badly. How could she terrify them that way? Even first prize wasn't worth it. He ran to where she taxied the plane and almost yanked her out of the c.o.c.kpit. throttle her for scaring him so badly. How could she terrify them that way? Even first prize wasn't worth it. He ran to where she taxied the plane and almost yanked her out of the c.o.c.kpit.
"What the h.e.l.l were you doing up there, you d.a.m.n fool? Trying to kill yourself showing off? Don't you realize that another foot and you couldn't have pulled up?"
"I know that," she said calmly, startled to realize that he was shaking. She had done everything intentionally and with flawless calculation.
"You're a lunatic, that's what you are! You're not human, and you have no right to be in a plane."