Uncle Sam's Boys In The Ranks - novelonlinefull.com
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"I won't, thank you, Sergeant."
"And don't be sensitive or foolish, Overton, about any little pranks some of the men are more or less bound to play upon you at first. The easiest way to keep out of trouble is to be good-natured all the time.
But that doesn't mean that you have to submit to any abuse."
"Thank you, Sergeant."
"Now, I'll take you to Sergeant Hupner."
That was more easily said than done. Sergeant Gray took Hal to the squad room in which he was to live thereafter, but Hupner was out at the time.
"Just stay here a little while, and report to Sergeant Hupner when he comes in," directed the first sergeant. "He'll a.s.sign you to a bed and make you feel at home."
Hardly had Sergeant Gray closed the door when Hal thought he had taken the measure of the eight other privates present. They looked like a clean, capable and genial lot of young fellows. He was speedily to find that they were "genial" enough.
"So you want to be a regular, do you?" quizzed one of the soldiers, halting before Hal, and looking him over.
"Why, I am one already, am I not?" asked Hal, smiling.
"No, sir, you're not," retorted the questioner. "How did you start in?
Made a grand stand play on the train last night, didn't you? Helped to shoot up a lot of train robbers, didn't you?"
"That was under orders of an Army officer," Hal replied good-naturedly.
The other soldiers had crowded about the pair.
"You went and played the hero, didn't you?" persisted the questioner.
"Probably you didn't know that a regular is never allowed to be a hero.
Heroes serve only in the volunteers."
This is a well-known joke in the Army. In war time local pride in the volunteer regiments is always strong. Local newspapers always devote most of their war s.p.a.ce to the "heroic" doings of the local volunteer regiment. The regulars do the bulk of the fighting, and the most dangerous, but their deeds of daring are rarely chronicled in the newspapers. All the praise goes to the volunteer regiments. Hence, in war time, a stock Army question is, "Are you a hero or a regular?"
"I guess you've made a mistake," remonstrated Hal, still good-naturedly.
"My friend and I didn't do anything in the heroic line. We simply fired when told to, and stopped firing, when told to. We didn't make any charges, capture any forts, or do anything in the least heroic. We simply stood by and did what the major told us."
"Good," nodded one of the other men. "The kid is bound to be a regular, all right. He doesn't brag, and I don't believe he's looking for any write-up in the newspapers."
"How did you feel under fire last night?" continued the merciless questioner. "Brave as a lion?"
"Don't you believe it," laughed Hal.
"Were you cool under fire?"
"Yes; I was!" Hal's answer leaped forth. "Cool? Why, man, I was so cold that it took me an hour, afterwards, to get warm again."
"He's got you there, Hyman," laughed another soldier. "Oh, the kid's going to be one of us, all right. He's no bouquet chaser."
"I don't know about that," replied Private Hyman gravely. "So many heroes in disguise try to sneak in among the regulars that it pays us to keep our eyes open. What sort of a medal are you going to order from Congress, kid?"
"A leather one," smiled Hal, "though I'd really prefer a tin medal."
Good-natured laughter greeted this answer.
But Private Hyman persisted:
"In war time you'd chuck us, just to get a commission in the volunteers, wouldn't you?"
"Not even for a general's commission in the volunteers," retorted Hal.
"Are you good at athletics?"
"No."
"Know anything about gymnastics?"
"Only one or two things."
"Come down to the end of the room with me," ordered Private Hyman.
Hal good-naturedly followed. So did the others.
"Now, let's see if you can do this," Hyman proposed. "Take a good start and jump over the first cot, then over the second, and right on down the line, as far as you can do."
That didn't look difficult. Hal leaped over the first cot, then, with hardly a pause, jumped over the second. So on he went, down over the line of ten cots.
"Now, go back again, over the cots on the other side," ordered Private Hyman.
Hal did so without difficulty, though he was flushed and panting by the time that he finished this brisk exercise.
"Kid, you're no good," grunted Hyman.
"I didn't try to make you believe I was any good," Hal retorted calmly.
"No, sir! Any man who jumps as easily and naturally as you do would jump the regulars any time, and go with the high-toned volunteer crowd."
"Humph! A fellow who can jump like that would jump right out of the service at the first breath of trouble," broke in another soldier.
"He'd desert," agreed a third.
"Walk on your hands?" queried Hyman.
Hal proved that he could do so by throwing his heels up into the air and taking a dozen steps on his hands before he again came to an erect att.i.tude.
"Brains are all in your heels," remarked Private Hyman thoughtfully.
"Can you pick that man up and carry him around on your back?"
The soldier indicated weighed at least a hundred and sixty pounds.
"I'll try," nodded Hal. Backing up to the soldier, he locked elbows, back to back, lifted the heavy one to his back and carried him twenty feet down the squad room.
"Any fellow with all that strength in his back would get his back up at trouble, and back out of any fight that came his way," declared Private Hyman. "But see here, can you place your head on one chair and your feet on another, stiffen your body and lie there without touching the floor in any way."