Two Men of Sandy Bar Part 7

Sandy (embarra.s.sed, and dropping his head in confusion). I was--pa.s.sing.

There is no school to-day.

Starbottle. Then, sir, Ged! permit me to--er--DEMAND--DEMAND, sir--an apology. You have laid, sir, your hand upon my person--demn me! Not the first time, sir, either; for, if I am not mistaken, you are the--er--inebriated menial, sir, who two months ago jostled me, sir,--demn me,--as I entered the rancho of my friend Don Jose Castro.

Sandy (starting, aside). Don Jose! (Aloud.) Hush, hush! She will hear you. No--that is--(stops, confused and embarra.s.sed. Aside.) She will hear of my disgrace. He will tell her the whole story.

Starbottle. I shall await your apology one hour. At the end of that time, if it is not forthcoming, I shall--er--er--waive your menial antecedents, and expect the--er--satisfaction of a gentleman.

Good-morning, sir. (Turns to schoolhouse.)

Sandy. No, no: you shall not go!

Starbottle. Who will prevent me?

Sandy (grappling him). I will. (Appealingly.) Look yer, stranger, don't provoke me, I, a desperate man, desperate and crazed with drink,--don't ye, don't ye do it! For G.o.d's sake, take your hands off me! Ye don't know what ye do. Ah! (Wildly, holding STARBOTTLE firmly, and forcing him backward to precipice beyond ledge of rocks.) Hear me. Three years ago, in a moment like this, I dragged a man--my friend--to this precipice.

I--I--no! no!--don't anger me now! (Sandy's grip on STARBOTTLE relaxes slightly, and his head droops.)

Starbottle (coolly). Permit me to remark, sir, that any reminiscence of your--er--friend--or any other man is--er--at this moment, irrelevant and impertinent. Permit me to point out the--er--fact, sir, that your hand is pressing heavily, demned heavily, on my shoulder.

Sandy (fiercely). You shall not go!

Starbottle (fiercely). Shall not?

Struggle. STARBOTTLE draws derringer from his breast-pocket, and SANDY seizes his arm. In this position both parties struggle to ledge of rocks, and COL. STARBOTTLE is forced partly over.

Miss Mary (opening schoolhouse door). I thought I heard voices. (Looking toward ledge of rocks, where COL. STARBOTTLE and SANDY are partly hidden by trees. Both men relax grasp of each other at MISS MARY'S voice.)

Col. Starbottle (aloud and with voice slightly raised, to SANDY).

By--er--leaning over this way a moment, a single moment, you will--er--perceive the trail I speak of. It follows the canyon to the right. It will bring you to--er--the settlement in an hour. (To MISS MARY, as if observing her for the first time.) I believe I am--er--right; but, being--er--more familiar with the locality, you can direct the gentleman better.

SANDY slowly sinks on his knees beside rock, with his face averted from schoolhouse, as COL. STARBOTTLE disengages himself, and advances jauntily and gallantly to schoolhouse.

Col. Starbottle. In--er--er--showing the stranger the--er--way, I perhaps interrupted our interview. The--er--observances of--er--civility and humanity must not be foregone, even for--er--the ladies.

I--er--believe I address Miss Mary Morris. When I--er--state that my name is Col. Starbottle, charged on mission of--er--delicate nature, I believe I--er--explain MY intrusion.

MISS MARY bows, and motions to schoolhouse door; COL. STARBOTTLE, bowing deeply, enters; but MISS MARY remains standing by door, looking toward trees that hide SANDY.

Miss Mary (aside). I am sure it was Sandy's voice! But why does he conceal himself?

Sandy (aside, rising slowly to his feet, with his back to schoolhouse door). Even this conceited bully overcomes me, and shames me with his readiness and tact. He was quick to spare her--a stranger--the spectacle of two angry men. I--I--must needs wrangle before her very door! Well, well! better out of her sight forever, than an object of pity or terror.

[Exit slowly, and with downcast eyes, right.

Miss Mary (watching the trail). It WAS Sandy! and this concealment means something more than bashfulness. Perhaps the stranger can explain.

[Enters schoolhouse, and closes door.

SCENE 2.--The same. Enter CONCHO, lame, cautiously, from R. Pauses at R., and then beckons to HOP SING, who follows R.

Concho (impatiently). Well! you saw him?

Hop Sing. Me see him.

Concho. And you recognized him?

Hop Sing. No shabe likoquize.

Concho (furiously). You knew him, eh? Carramba! You KNEW him.

Hop Sing (slowly and sententiously). Me shabe man you callee Diego.

Me shabbee Led Gulchee call Sandy. Me shabbee man Poker Flat callee Alexandlee Molton. Allee same, John! Allee same!

Concho (rubbing his hands). Bueno! Good John! good John! And you knew he was called Alexander Morton? And go on--good John--go on!

Hop Sing. Me plentee washee shirtee--Melican man Poker Flat. Me plentee washee shirt Alexandlee Molton. Always litee, litee on shirt allee time.

(Pointing to tail of his blouse, and imitating writing with finger.) Alexandlee Molton. Melican man tellee me--shirt say Alexandlee Molton--shabbee?

Concho. Bueno! Excellent John. Good John. His linen marked Alexander Morton. The proofs are gathering! (crosses to C.)--the letter I found in his pack, addressed to Alexander Morton, Poker Flat, which first put me on his track; the story of his wife's infidelity, and her flight with his partner to red Gulch, the quarrel and fight that separated them, his flight to San Jose, his wanderings to the mission of San Carmel, to the rancho of the Holy Fisherman. The record is complete!

Hop Sing. Alexandlee Molton--

Concho (hurriedly returning to HOP SING). Yes! good John; yes, good John--go on. Alexander Morton--

Hop Sing. Alexandlee Molton. Me washee shirt, Alexandlee Molton; he no pay washee. Me washee flowty dozen hep--four bittie dozen--twenty dollar hep. Alexandlee Molton no payee. He say, "Go to h.e.l.lee!" You pay me (extending his hand).

Concho. Car--! (checking himself). Poco tiempo, John! In good time, John. Forty dollar--yes. Fifty dollar! Tomorrow, John.

Hop Sing. Me no likee "to-mollow!" Me no likee "nex time, John!"

Allee time Melican man say, "Chalkee up, John," "No smallee change, John,"--umph. Plenty foolee me!

Concho. You shall have your money, John; but go now--you comprehend.

Carramba! go! (Pushes HOP SING to wing.)

Hop Sing (expostulating). Flowty dozen, hep, John! twenty dollar, John.

Sabe. Flowty--twenty--(gesticulating with fingers).

[Exit HOP SING, pushed off by CONCHO.

Concho. The pagan dolt! But he is important. Ah, if he were wiser, I should not rid myself of him so quickly! And now for the schoolmistress,--the sweetheart of Sandy. If these men have not lied, he is in love with her; and, if he is, he has told her his secret before now; and she will be swift to urge him to his rights. If he has not told her--umph! (laughing) it will not be a DAY--an HOUR--before she will find out if her lover is Alexander Morton, the rich man's son, or "Sandy," the unknown vagabond. Eh, friend Sandy! It was a woman that locked up your secret: it shall be a woman, Madre di Dios! who shall unlock it. Ha! (Goes to door of schoolhouse as door opens, and appears COL. STARBOTTLE.)

Concho (aside). A thousand devils! the lawyer of the old man Morton.

(Aloud.) Pardon, pardon! I am a stranger. I have lost my way on the mountain. I am seeking a trail. Senor, pardon!

Starbottle (aside). Another man seeking the road! Ged, I believe he's lying too. (Aloud.) It is before you, sir, DOWN,--down the mountain.

Concho. A thousand thanks, senor. (Aside.) Perdition catch him! (Aloud.) Thanks, senor. [Exit R.

Starbottle. Ged, I've seen that face before. Ged, it's Castro's major-domo. Demn me, but I believe all his domestics have fallen in love with the pretty schoolma'am.