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"It's just good television," she agreed.
He rolled his eyes. "Right. Anyway, that's one thing the stories get right. You become a vampire by having one feed from youa""
"Drink your blood," she said, and he nodded.
"Drink your blood. Then you feed off them and the circle is complete. But that's a simplified view. It's actually a little more complicated than that."
She rubbed her fingers over her temples, suddenly confused. "How do you mean?"
"The circ.u.mstances have to be right too. Human's have a natural immunity to whatever it is in our blood that makes us what we area"that's why there are so few of us compared to the rest of the population. Best we can figure there has to be some kind of weakness in the body alreadya"an illness or an injurya"to make the transformation complete."
She sighed. "I'm getting very tired."
"Like I said, it's complicated. There's a lot we still don't know."
She frowned. "What, is there like a lab full of vampire scientists somewhere trying to figure out the hows and whys of it all?"
"Actually, there are several," he said mildly, and she did a double take.
"Where?"
"Long Beach, actually. Also London, Paris, Prague, Budapest and Vancouver." He chuckled when her jaw dropped.
"Long Beach. That's weird," she decided. "So, what have they figured out?"
He shrugged. "They're still doing basic research into transmission and transformation."
"Transformation?" she asked. "You mean what happens to your body when you become a vampire?" He nodded, and she chewed her lip thoughtfully, mind racing. "So what does happen?"
Jack grinned. "More curious than mad now, are we, darling?"
"Oh I'm sure I'll get back to mad," she a.s.sured him. "It's just fascinating is all."
"Indeed," he murmured, a spark of something lighting in his eyes as he watched her.
When he didn't say anything else, she shifted restlessly. "The transformation?" she prompted.
"Right." He cleared his throat. "The details are fuzzy on my own transformation since I was unconscious when it took place, but basically something happens on a molecular level. Bones become more dense, muscles become thicker, stronger. The need for basics like food, water, even air becomes almost miniscule. The aging process is slowed so it's almost infinitesimal."
Rowan struggled to understand. "But you're not dead."
He shook his head. "No, but one of the things they can't figure out is why we don't appear to make our own blood anymore. It's why we have to feed, to replenish the supply."
"Yeah, that is sort of odda"that it would strengthen you and slow down the aging process but not allow you to make your own blood."
"One of the theories being tested is that the process is slowed down just as the aging process but to such a slow rate so as to be impossible to survive without regular infusions."
"Infusions." She raised a sardonic brow. "You make it sound like a medical procedure, like dialysis."
"It's not that different. It's not," he insisted when she continued to look skeptical. "It's necessary for survival and there is a network of blood banks all over the world. I keep a supply in the freezer and thaw a packet each day. Which reminds me, don't eat the blue packets in the freezer."
She made a face as if she'd just tasted something foul. "Don't worry, I won't. What do you do if you don't have a freezer handy?
"We can get it in powder form as well and mix it with water. Think of it as a vampire protein shake."
"Doesn't it skeeve you out?"
"Skeeve?" he asked.
"You know," she said, impatient. "Gross you out."
He shrugged. "It's a little inconvenient, but one does get used to it. The major advantage is it makes surviving without feeding off humans possible."
She started. "You don't feed off humans?"
Jack shook his head. "Not as a rule, not anymore. There was a time when it was the only game in town. But this is the twenty-first century and it's considered bad form to go pillaging. Besides, how long do you think it would be before we were discovered and hunted down, exterminated, if we went around biting people all the time."
"Good point," she conceded. "So the blood banks stock blood. Is it human blood? Where does it come from?" She suddenly had a horrible thought. "That's not where my Red Cross donation goes, is it?"
He chuckled again. "No, darling. I call them blood banks because it's just simpler. What they are actually, are manufacturing sites for synthetic blood. There are at least two in every country, sometimes more. It's not actually synthetic blood either, it's more like a serum that gives our bodies the boost it needs to make more."
Rowan frowned, oddly deflated. "So what, vampires don't drink blood anymore at all?"
"Sure we do. Just not for survival. It's more forarecreation."
She blinked, the rough, intimate sound of his voice gliding over her like a rough caress. "What is that? Are you flirting with me?"
He grinned at her, unfazed by the panicked edge to her voice. "Yes, I think I was."
"Well knock it off!" she shrieked. When he just continued to grin, exuding s.e.xual charisma and charm, she decided to distract him with more questions. "Tell me about the mind-reading thing."
"I can't actually read minds," he explained. "It's more like I can read emotions. Anger, fear." His voice dropped. "Arousal."
She ignored that. "But before, you picked the wordsa"I mean the exact wordsa"right out of my head."
"If the emotions are strong enough, the effect is amplified and I get more specific impressions."
"You can do it with everyone?"
"In theory," he said. "I don't notice half the time actually, unless I stumble across someone who's experiencing some extreme emotion."
She frowned. "Why, if you can do it with everyone?"
He shrugged. "I had to learn to block other people's emotions or I'd have gone crazy."
She narrowed her eyes. "Then why aren't you blocking mine?"
"I have to have some leverage with you," he explained, and she felt her temper go nuclear.
"Excuse me?" she said, her voice barely audible, she was so angry.
He must've known she was mada"he was a f.u.c.king mind reader after alla"but he wasn't fazed. "At first, I didn't know if you knew I was a vampire or not and that's why you didn't want to be with me."
"Wait." She held up a hand. "You thought I might know you were a vampire. Why would you think that?"
"Your father knows."
Rowan's mind boggled at the thought. "My father knows?"
Jack nodded. "We had anaincidentain the first few months I worked for him. The a.s.sa.s.sination attempt in Sacramento."
She nodded. "I remember."
"The a.s.sa.s.sin was another vampire. When the police shot him, he played dead until they left then tried for your father again. I had to fight him, hand to hand." He shrugged. "He figured things out for himself after that."
"Ew."
"It wasn't pretty," he said dryly. "Anyway, I thought he might have told you. But he hadn't, and after that I would just kind of check in whenever I saw you, to see if I could get a glimmer of interest from you."
The thought that he'd been fishing around in her mind while she was fantasizing about him was so potentially humiliating that she forgot about her father for a moment. "You were trying to see if I wanted you?"
He nodded.
Her face was starting to feel warm. "I see."
Jack stood up. "Don't you want to know what I found out?"
"No, not really," she said, shaking her head so hard she whipped herself with her own hair.
"Coward," he chided gently.
"d.a.m.n skippy," she said. She frowned when he took a step toward her. "What're you doing?"
"Walking," he said, taking another step.
"Smart-a.s.s." Having him loom over her was making her more nervous so she stood to put them on even ground. It didn't help too much. "You're crowding me again."
"Am I?" he said, one tawny brow quirked in question as he stopped in front of her, his toes nudging hers.
"Yes," she said, fighting the urge to turn tail and run into the bedroom. "You're always doing that and it drives me crazy."
"Well then we're even, because the way you keep pulling away from mea"when I know b.l.o.o.d.y well you want me as much as I want youa"drives me crazy."
Rowan forced herself not to flinch away when his hand came up to stroke her cheek then had to force herself not to lean into the caress. He leaned down to speak directly into her ear.
"We both know I could have you naked and begging me to f.u.c.k you in no time," he whispered, his breath washing over her ear and making her shiver despite herself. "That o.r.g.a.s.m on the street wasn't nearly enough to take the edge off. I can smell the desire on you, simmering below the surface. It wouldn't take mucha"a kiss herea"" he brushed his lips over her earlobe "a"a lick there." He swiped his tongue up the side of her neck.
"You'd beg me to sink my c.o.c.k into you and before I was done, you'd be begging me to sink my teeth into you too."
She swallowed hard. "It wouldn't mean anything," she managed.
"I know," he said, and dropped his hand from her face.
"What?" she said, stunned. She'd thought for sure he was going to press his advantage. It wouldn't have taken much to push her over the edge, and even though a part of her would have absolutely regretted it in the morning, she was a little disappointed.
"It doesn't mean anything unless you want it too." He picked up his head and waited for her to meet his eyes. His gaze was serious and direct. "I know you want me, but you don't want to want me. Right?"
"Ahait's a little more complicated than that."
"Sure it is. You don't like losing control and around me you feel like you don't have any."
Rowan felt her face getting hot. "I'm not wild about this mind-reading thing you do."
He chuckled, the sound full of gentle humor. "I know. But this was a problem even before you knew I was tapping into your heada"and remind me to ask you about that plum pudding fantasy sometime." He grinned at her outraged gasp then went on. "You don't like feeling out of control."
Rowan was still struggling with knowing he'd been privy to one of her most unusual and most sensual fantasies. "That's not exactly news," she muttered. "Everyone knows I don't like to be managed. I had enough of it as a child. But I'm an adult now and I don't have to put up with it anymore." She knew she sounded like a petulant child but she couldn't seem to help it.
"I don't want to manage you," he began, but stopped at her scoff of disbelief.
"Oh please, Jack. You're managing my entire life right now! I got put on a planea"against my willa"and flown to a foreign country. I a.s.sume I can't do much, since I'm supposed to be hiding out from a homicidal maniac who wants to literally crucify me. And none of this is my idea."
He sighed. "You've got a point."
"And frankly," she went on, "the idea that you can just dip into my thoughts any old time you like, well, that freaks me the h.e.l.l out! It makes me feel vulnerable and off balance, out of control. Having someone being able to read your thoughts and feelingsawella It makes me feel likealikea" she cast around for the right phrase.
"Like your choices are being taken away?" he asked quietly.
"Yes." She slumped in relief that he understood. "Exactly."
"f.u.c.k!"
Rowan started. He'd been so quiet and gentle until now, the violence contained in that one word took her aback. He turned to pace away from her, dragging one hand through his hair in a gesture of frustration. He stopped with his back to her, his body tight with tension.
She shifted awkwardly from foot to foot, not knowing what to do. Her instinct was to go to him, offer comfort, but how could she do that since he was what she needed comfort from?
Nevertheless, the long silence was making her very uneasy. "Jack?" she ventured tentatively, and his shoulders tensed even further. Then he seemed to make a conscious effort at relaxing them and turned to face her again.
"Rowan, I'd never hurt you." His voice was low, his tone intent, and she knew he meant it.
"I know that," she said, and she did. No matter what he was, he was an honorable man and she knew he'd rather cut off his own arm than cause her pain.
"But you're still afraid."
"Jack, it's not that I'm afraid you'll hurt me." She looked down at her feet. "I just don't like feeling so out of control. You have all the advantages, all the knowledge. I feel like I'm being carried along by the tide."
She risked a peek at him. He was studying her thoughtfully now, the frustration and anger of a moment ago replaced by speculation. "What?"
"I've been trying to get you into my bed for a year and a half."