Tongues of Conscience - novelonlinefull.com
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"The Skipper's meeting with his drowned comrades, in that belfry tower.
He will stand with the ropes dropping from his hands, triumph in his eyes. They will be seen coming up out of the darkness, grey men and dripping from the sea, with dead eyes and hanging lips. And first among them will be my wonder-child, on whom will fall a ray of light from a wild moon, half seen through the narrow slit of the deep-set window."
"No, no!"
"What do you say?"
"Your wonder-child must not be there. Why should he? He is alive."
"You think so?"
Uniacke made no reply.
"I say, do you think so?"
"How can I know? It is impossible. But--yes, I think so."
The clergyman turned away. A sickness of the conscience overtook him like physical pain. Sir Graham was by the door with his hand upon it.
"And yet," he said, "you do not believe in intuitions. Nothing tells you whether that woman you loved is dead or living. You said that."
"Nothing."
"Then what should tell you whether Jack is dead or living?"
He turned and went out. Presently Uniacke saw his dark figure pa.s.s, like a shadow, across the square of the window. The night grew more quiet by slow degrees. The hush after the storm increased. And to the young clergyman's unquiet nerves it seemed like a crescendo in music instead of like a diminuendo, as sometimes seems the falling to sleep of a man to a man who cannot sleep. The noise of the storm had been softer than the sound of this increasing silence in which the church bells presently died away. Uniacke was consumed by an apprehension that was almost like the keen tooth of jealousy. For he knew that the Skipper had ceased from his patient task and Sir Graham did not return. He imagined a colloquy.
But the Skipper's madness would preserve the secret which he no longer knew, and, therefore, could not reveal. He made the bells call Jack Pringle. He would never point to the defaced grave and say, "Jack Pringle lies beneath this stone." And yet sanity might, perhaps, return, a rush of knowledge of the past and recognition of its tragedy.
Uniacke took his hat and went to the door. He stood out on the step.
Sea-birds were crying. The sound of the sea withdrew moment by moment, as if it were stealing furtively away. Behind, in the rectory pa.s.sage, the servant clattered as she brought in the supper.
"Sir Graham!" Uniacke called suddenly. "Sir Graham!"
"Yes."
The voice came from somewhere in the shadow of the church.
"Will you not come in? Supper is ready."
In a moment the painter came out of the gloom.
"That churchyard draws me," he said, mounting the step.
"You saw the Skipper?"
"Yes, leaving."
"Did he speak to you?"
"Not a word."
The clergyman breathed a sigh of relief.
In the evening Uniacke turned his pipe two or three times in his fingers and said, looking down:
"That picture of yours--"
"Yes. What of it?"
"You will paint it in London, I suppose?"
"How can I do that? The imagination of it came to me here, is sustained and quickened by these surroundings."
"You mean to paint it here?" the clergyman faltered.
Sir Graham was evidently struck by his host's air of painful discomfiture.
"I beg your pardon," he said hastily. "Of course I do not mean to inflict myself upon your kind hospitality while I am working. I shall return to the inn."
Uniacke flushed red at being so misunderstood.
"I cannot let you do that. No, no! Honestly, my question was only prompted by--by--a thought--"
"Yes?"
"Do not think me impertinent. But, really, a regard for you has grown up in me since you have allowed me to know you--a great regard indeed."
"Thank you, thank you, Uniacke," said the painter, obviously moved.
"And it has struck me that in your present condition of health, and seeing that your mind is pursued by these--these melancholy sea thoughts and imaginings, it might be safer, better for you to be in a place less desolate, less preyed upon by the sea. That is all. Believe me, that is all."
He spoke the last words with the peculiar insistence and almost declamatory fervour of the liar. But he was now embarked upon deceit and must crowd all sail. And with the utterance of his lie he took an abrupt resolution.
"Let us go away together somewhere," he exclaimed, with a brightening face. "I need a holiday. I will get a brother clergyman to come over from the mainland and take my services. You asked me some day to return your visit. I accept your invitation here and now. Let me come with you to London."
Sir Graham shook his head.
"You put me in the position of an inhospitable man," he said. "In the future you must come to me. I look forward to that. I depend upon it.
But I cannot go to London at present. My house, my studio are become loathsome to me. The very street in which I live echoes with childish footsteps. I cannot be there."
"Sir Graham, you must learn to look upon your past act in a different light. If you do not, your power of usefulness in the world will be crushed."
The clergyman spoke with an intense earnestness. His sense of his own increasing unworthiness, the fighting sense of the necessity laid upon him to be unworthy for this sick man's sake, tormented him, set his heart in a sea of trouble. He strove to escape out of it by mental exertion. His eyes shone with unnatural fervour as he went on:
"When you first told me your story, I thought this thing weighed upon you unnecessarily. Now I see more and more clearly that your unnatural misery over a very natural act springs from ill-health. It is your body which you confuse with your conscience. Your remorse is a disease removable by medicine, by a particular kind of air or scene, by waters even it may be, or by hard exercise, or by a voyage."
"A voyage!" cried Sir Graham bitterly.
"Well, well--by such means, I would say, as come to a doctor's mind. You labour under the yoke of the body."