Three Plays Part 36

DINA. Tried? I should say we had! Twice, Signora!

SIGNORA CINI. Well ... so then ... you have probably talked to her....

DINA. We were not _received_, if you please!

SIGNORA SIRELLI, SIRELLI, SIGNORA CINI (_in chorus_). Not received? Why! Why! Why!

DINA. This very forenoon!

AMALIA. The first time we waited fully fifteen minutes at the door. We rang and rang and rang, and no one came. Why, we weren't even able to leave our cards! So we went back today....

DINA (_throwing up her hands in an expression of horror_).

And _he_ came to the door.

SIGNORA SIRELLI. Why yes, with that face of his ... you can tell by just looking at the man.... Such a face! Such a face! You can't blame people for talking! And then, with that black suit of his.... Why, they all dress in black. Did you ever notice? Even the old lady! And the man's eyes, too!...

SIRELLI (_with a glance of pitying disgust at his wife_).

What do you know about his eyes? You never saw his eyes! And you never saw the woman. How do you know she dresses in black? _Probably_ she dresses in black.... By the way, they come from a little town in the next county. Had you heard that? A village called Marsica!

AMALIA. Yes, the village that was destroyed a short time ago.

SIRELLI. Exactly! By an earthquake! Not a house left standing in the place.

DINA. And all their relatives were lost, I have heard. Not one of them left in the world!

SIGNORA CINI (_impatient to get on with the story_). Very well, very well, so then ... he came to the door....

AMALIA. Yes.... And the moment I saw him in front of me with that weird face of his I had hardly enough gumption left to tell him that we had just come to call on his mother-in-law, and he ... well ... not a word, not a word ... not even a "thank you," if you please!

DINA. That is not quite fair, mama: ... he did bow!

AMALIA. Well, yes, a bow ... if you want to call it that.

Something like this!...

DINA. And his eyes! You ought to see his eyes--the eyes of a devil, and then some! You never saw a man with eyes like that!

SIGNORA CINI. Very well, what did he say, finally?

DINA. He seemed quite taken aback.

AMALIA. He was all confused like; He hitched about for a time; and at last he said that Signora Frola was not feeling well, but that she would appreciate our kindness in having come; and then he just stood there, and stood there, apparently waiting for us to go away.

DINA. I never was more mortified in my life!

SIRELLI. A boor, a plain boor, I say! Oh, it's his fault, I am telling you. And ... who knows? Perhaps he has got the old lady also under lock and key.

SIGNORA SIRELLI. Well, I think something should be done about it!... After all, you are the wife of a superior of his. You can _refuse_ to be treated like that.

AMALIA. As far as that goes, my husband did take it rather badly--as a lack of courtesy on the man's part; and he went straight to the prefect with the matter, insisting on an apology.

_Signor Agazzi, commendatore and provincial councillor, appears in the doorway rear._

DINA. Oh goody, here's papa now!

AGAZZI _is well on toward fifty. He has the harsh, authoritarian manner of the provincial of importance. Red hair and beard, rather unkempt; gold-rimmed eyegla.s.ses_.

AGAZZI. Oh Sirelli, glad to see you! (_He steps forward and bows to the company_).

AGAZZI. Signora!... (_He shakes hands with Signora Sirelli_).

AMALIA (_introducing Signora Cini_). My husband, Signora Cini!

AGAZZI (_with a bow and taking her hand_). A great pleasure, madam! (_Then turning to his wife and daughter in a mysterious voice_): I have come back from the office to give you some real news! Signora Frola will be here shortly.

SIGNORA SIRELLI (_clapping her hands delightedly_). Oh, the mother-in-law! She is coming? Really? Coming here?

SIRELLI (_going over to Agazzi and pressing his hand warmly as an expression of admiration_). That's the talk, old man, that's the talk! What's needed here is some show of authority.

AGAZZI. Why I had to, you see, I had to!... I can't let a man treat my wife and daughter that way!...

SIRELLI. I should say not! I was just expressing myself to that effect right here.

SIGNORA SIRELLI. And it would have been entirely proper to inform the prefect also....

AGAZZI (_antic.i.p.ating_). ... of all the talk that is going around on this fine gentleman's account? Oh, leave that to me! I didn't miss the opportunity.

SIRELLI. Fine! Fine!

SIGNORA CINI. And such talk!

AMALIA. For my part, I never heard of such a thing. Why, do you know, he has them both under lock and key!

DINA. No, mama, we are not _quite_ sure of that. We are not _quite_ sure about the old lady, yet.

AMALIA. Well, we know it about his wife, anyway.

SIRELLI. And what did the prefect have to say?

AGAZZI. Oh the prefect ... well, the prefect ... he was very much impressed, _very_ much impressed, with what I had to say.

SIRELLI. I should hope so!

AGAZZI. You see, some of the talk had reached his ears already. And he agrees that it is better, as a matter of his own official prestige, for all this mystery in connection with one of his a.s.sistants to be cleared up, so that once and for all we shall know the truth.

LAUDISI. Hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah!

AMALIA. That is Lamberto's usual contribution. He laughs!