This Side of Paradise Part 16

HE: I didn't know you were that way.

SHE: What did you expect?

HE: I thought you'd be sort of-sort of-s.e.xless, you know, swim and play golf.

SHE: Oh, I do-but not in business hours.

HE: Business?

SHE: Six to two-strictly.

HE: I'd like to have some stock in the corporation.

SHE: Oh, it's not a corporation-it's just "Rosalind, Unlimited." Fifty-one shares, name, good-will, and everything goes at $25,000 a year.

HE: (Disapprovingly) Sort of a chilly proposition.

SHE: Well, Amory, you don't mind-do you? When I meet a man that doesn't bore me to death after two weeks, perhaps it'll be different.

HE: Odd, you have the same point of view on men that I have on women.

SHE: I'm not really feminine, you know-in my mind.

HE: (Interested) Go on.

SHE: No, you-you go on-you've made me talk about myself. That's against the rules.

HE: Rules?

SHE: My own rules-but you-Oh, Amory, I hear you're brilliant. The family expects so much of you.

HE: How encouraging!

SHE: Alec said you'd taught him to think. Did you? I didn't believe any one could.

HE: No. I'm really quite dull.

(He evidently doesn't intend this to be taken seriously.) SHE: Liar.

HE: I'm-I'm religious-I'm literary. I've-I've even written poems.

SHE: Vers libre-splendid! (She declaims.) "The trees are green, The birds are singing in the trees, The girl sips her poison The bird flies away the girl dies."

HE: (Laughing) No, not that kind.

SHE: (Suddenly) I like you.

HE: Don't.

SHE: Modest too- HE: I'm afraid of you. I'm always afraid of a girl-until I've kissed her.

SHE: (Emphatically) My dear boy, the war is over.

HE: So I'll always be afraid of you.

SHE: (Rather sadly) I suppose you will.

(A slight hesitation on both their parts.) HE: (After due consideration) Listen. This is a frightful thing to ask.

SHE: (Knowing what's coming) After five minutes.

HE: But will you-kiss me? Or are you afraid?

SHE: I'm never afraid-but your reasons are so poor.

HE: Rosalind, I really want to kiss you.

SHE: So do I.

(They kiss-definitely and thoroughly.) HE: (After a breathless second) Well, is your curiosity satisfied?

SHE: Is yours?

HE: No, it's only aroused.

(He looks it.) SHE: (Dreamily) I've kissed dozens of men. I suppose I'll kiss dozens more.

HE: (Abstractedly) Yes, I suppose you could-like that.

SHE: Most people like the way I kiss.

HE: (Remembering himself) Good Lord, yes. Kiss me once more, Rosalind.

SHE: No-my curiosity is generally satisfied at one.

HE: (Discouraged) Is that a rule?

SHE: I make rules to fit the cases.

HE: You and I are somewhat alike-except that I'm years older in experience.

SHE: How old are you?

HE: Almost twenty-three. You?

SHE: Nineteen-just.

HE: I suppose you're the product of a fashionable school.

SHE: No-I'm fairly raw material. I was expelled from Spence-I've forgotten why.

HE: What's your general trend?

SHE: Oh, I'm bright, quite selfish, emotional when aroused, fond of admiration- HE: (Suddenly) I don't want to fall in love with you- SHE: (Raising her eyebrows) n.o.body asked you to.

HE: (Continuing coldly) But I probably will. I love your mouth.

SHE: Hush! Please don't fall in love with my mouth-hair, eyes, shoulders, slippers-but not my mouth. Everybody falls in love with my mouth.

HE: It's quite beautiful.

SHE: It's too small.

HE: No it isn't-let's see.

(He kisses her again with the same thoroughness.) SHE: (Rather moved) Say something sweet.

HE: (Frightened) Lord help me.

SHE: (Drawing away) Well, don't-if it's so hard.

HE: Shall we pretend? So soon?

SHE: We haven't the same standards of time as other people.

HE: Already it's-other people.

SHE: Let's pretend.

HE: No-I can't-it's sentiment.

SHE: You're not sentimental?

HE: No, I'm romantic-a sentimental person thinks things will last-a romantic person hopes against hope that they won't. Sentiment is emotional.

SHE: And you're not? (With her eyes half-closed.) You probably flatter yourself that that's a superior att.i.tude.

HE: Well-Rosalind, Rosalind, don't argue-kiss me again.

SHE: (Quite chilly now) No-I have no desire to kiss you.

HE: (Openly taken aback) You wanted to kiss me a minute ago.

SHE: This is now.

HE: I'd better go.

SHE: I suppose so.

(He goes toward the door.) SHE: Oh!

(He turns.) SHE: (Laughing) Score-Home Team: One hundred-Opponents: Zero.

(He starts back.) SHE: (Quickly) Rain-no game.

(He goes out.) (She goes quietly to the chiffonier, takes out a cigarette-case and hides it in the side drawer of a desk. Her mother enters, note-book in hand.) MRS. CONNAGE: Good-I've been wanting to speak to you alone before we go down-stairs.

ROSALIND: Heavens! you frighten me!

MRS. CONNAGE: Rosalind, you've been a very expensive proposition.

ROSALIND: (Resignedly) Yes.

MRS. CONNAGE: And you know your father hasn't what he once had.

ROSALIND: (Making a wry face) Oh, please don't talk about money.

MRS. CONNAGE: You can't do anything without it. This is our last year in this house-and unless things change Cecelia won't have the advantages you've had.

ROSALIND: (Impatiently) Well-what is it?

MRS. CONNAGE: So I ask you to please mind me in several things I've put down in my note-book. The first one is: don't disappear with young men. There may be a time when it's valuable, but at present I want you on the dance-floor where I can find you. There are certain men I want to have you meet and I don't like finding you in some corner of the conservatory exchanging silliness with any one-or listening to it.

ROSALIND: (Sarcastically) Yes, listening to it is better.

MRS. CONNAGE: And don't waste a lot of time with the college set-little boys nineteen and twenty years old. I don't mind a prom or a football game, but staying away from advantageous parties to eat in little cafes down-town with Tom, d.i.c.k, and Harry- ROSALIND: (Offering her code, which is, in its way, quite as high as her mother's) Mother, it's done-you can't run everything now the way you did in the early nineties.

MRS. CONNAGE: (Paying no attention) There are several bachelor friends of your father's that I want you to meet to-night-youngish men.

ROSALIND: (Nodding wisely) About forty-five?

MRS. CONNAGE: (Sharply) Why not?

ROSALIND: Oh, quite all right-they know life and are so adorably tired looking (shakes her head)-but they will dance.

MRS. CONNAGE: I haven't met Mr. Blaine-but I don't think you'll care for him. He doesn't sound like a money-maker.

ROSALIND: Mother, I never think about money.

MRS. CONNAGE: You never keep it long enough to think about it.

ROSALIND: (Sighs) Yes, I suppose some day I'll marry a ton of it-out of sheer boredom.

MRS. CONNAGE: (Referring to note-book) I had a wire from Hartford. Dawson Ryder is coming up. Now there's a young man I like, and he's floating in money. It seems to me that since you seem tired of Howard Gillespie you might give Mr. Ryder some encouragement. This is the third time he's been up in a month.

ROSALIND: How did you know I was tired of Howard Gillespie?

MRS. CONNAGE: The poor boy looks so miserable every time he comes.