The Year Of The Ladybird Part 22

I really wasn't sure about that.

Soon enough the stage door opened to reveal a rectangle of yellow light. The figures of a man and a woman carrying large prop bags and with polythene-wrapped stage costumes over their arms emerged into the shadows. As they joined the illuminated main street in front of the doors of the theatre we were able to intercept them 'Luca!' Nikki said. 'And Terri!'

They were both paralysed by our sudden appearance. Their eyes flared wide in the light from the streetlamp. Traces of stage make-up remained at the corners of their eyes. They looked pale, ghosts of the people I'd known at the holiday resort.

Terri looked at me without a trace of expression.

'Don't you remember us?' Nikki said cheerfully.

Terri was the one who recovered first. I could almost feel the engine of her brain turning. 'Nikki and David!' she said. 'Look, it's Nikki and David! From the resort,' she added, as if she needed to prompt Luca into remembering who we were.

Luca was still floundering. 'Yes of course! How amazing to see you! Simply amazing!'

I intuited all the thoughts processing in Terri's mind. She stepped forward so that she could kiss me. She stood on tiptoe to reach me; a gesture that still burned.

'What a coincidence to see you both here!' I said.

'Yes,' he said, 'a coincidence.'

'Actually,' I said, 'we pa.s.sed the billboard earlier. Nikki was the one who recognised you!'

They both looked at me, smiling, as if I were telling a truly fascinating story.

The hiatus was embarra.s.sing so I said to Luca, 'But you changed your name.'

Nikki said, 'It's just s...o...b..z, David!'

Luca said, 'Yes I changed my name. A different show. A new start, you know?' He put his hand in his pocket and fumbled with some loose change, then he bought out a set of car keys.

I stepped over to the billboard and examined the picture. I looked back at Terri, and then back at the picture. 'It's fantastic! I mean, we all said you should be on stage.'

'We formed a duet,' she said unnecessarily.

'What, after you left? You formed a duet?' I had Terri on the rack, and I wasn't going to stop. You see, in that moment I understood with shining clarity that Luca and I had both been her lovers at the same time. I suspect Luca might have guessed, too. It meant of course that Colin's initial suspicions were confirmed after all.

Luca looked up the street and then back at me with the same fixed smile. He wasn't saying much at all. He shook the car keys in his hand.

'So is this where you are a student?' Terri asked me, swinging the spotlight in another direction. 'What about you, Nikki? What are you up to these days?'

'I'm applying to University, aren't I, David? I'm going to be a stoooooooodent!!'

Terri smiled the long, long smile of wonder and dismay.

'Autumn Leaves, that was my favourite.' I said to Luca. 'I really used to enjoy doing all that. And of course it's autumn now, isn't it?'

'I never found such a good lights man since,' he said chivalrously. His jaw, too, must have ached from smiling. 'Look, lovely people, I'm very sorry but we have to slip away to a party.'

'A party!' Nikki said ''Well, you could come, couldn't they, Terri? Except that it's a family thing, you know, and I don't think it's appropriate.'

'No, that wouldn't work, would it?' I said. 'A pity.'

'Why don't you give us your telephone number?' Luca said. 'Then we could call you. Have a coffee somewhere. Coffee and a nice cake.'

'I don't have a telephone number. Student, you see. Always broke. You know how it is.'

Terri opened her handbag, struggling with the polythene-wrapped stage dress over her arm, and produced a pen. 'Let me give you our number, then.'

There was a wonderful moment when we thought we hadn't got a sc.r.a.p of paper between the four of us on which to write. Then Terri went back into her handbag and found a bus ticket. We had a laugh about that writing on a bus ticket. How funny. On the reverse of the ticket she very carefully wrote out a phone number, and she handed it to Nikki rather than to me.

After that, Luca held out a hand that wanted shaking. 'Goodbye for now,' he said and we shook hands. Terri stepped forward to kiss me again, and Luca kissed Nikki.

We watched them go. They pa.s.sed before the yellow lights of the small theatre and I watched them, Terri with her quick, almost angry little steps and Luca striding to keep up with her.

'That was hard work for some reason,' Nikki said as we walked away in a different direction.

'It was.'

'I don't think they were all that pleased to see us.'

'No. I don't think they were.'

Nikki turned her collar up to the damp air and linked her arm in mine. In the mist and damp air of Nottingham town she was so beautiful.

Nikki got the pantomime job in Coventry. I helped her with her O levels in the meantime. We were ecstatically happy. Over the Christmas holidays we stayed with Mum and Ken. They treated Nikki to the best china and silverware and Ken told stories that even I hadn't heard. I think Ken had fallen for her.

College life restored equilibrium to our days. There was the routine of lectures, seminars, coffee bars and the union bar. Nikki got bits of work here and there, but she loved being a student even if we were broke a lot of the time. She changed the way she dressed and wore a duffel coat and a long, winding college scarf. We joined the Anti-n.a.z.i League and sent Tony a badge. We never heard back from him.

The National Front meanwhile turned inward on itself, dissolving in bitter faction and violence as they disagreed on ways to make the country Great again. There were court cases, scandals, violence. Some of those leading figures are still around. There were no rivers of blood in the following years, and of course certain people were rather disappointed about that.

In the spring we got a letter from Pinky asking if we wanted to work for him again the following summer.

One night in April I was roused from sleep in the small hours by a tapping on the window. For a split-second I thought it was going to be Colin; or perhaps the boy on the beach, all over again, because the boy never completely went away. But it was only a friend, a fellow student who had locked himself out of his student lodge and wanted to sleep on our floor.

Whether it's Madame Rosa, or her sister Dot in the steam laundry, or the mechanical slot machine on the pier: the advice comes down to the same thing. The future will be what we choose it to be, just so long as we carefully engineer the present. As for the past, it moves like sand under your feet. These things happened a long time ago, yet remain luminous in my mind. As I write this I have resting on a pile of papers on my desk a gla.s.s paperweight. Scarlet with black spots, it is designed to look like a beautiful ladybird.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS.

The wonderful American writer Jeffrey Ford deserves a special mention for encouraging me to write this novel after I'd explained the colourful inst.i.tution of the British holiday camp to him over a beer. I also thank my wife Sue, who is my first reader and an indomitable critic; my loyal agent Luigi Bonomi; and my incredibly supportive editor Simon Spanton. I'd also like to thank Jon Weir and Charlie Panayiotou at Gollancz, as well as Colin Murray.

I worked on different holiday camps all those years ago and I must say that my fellow workers were generally much kinder than some of the characters in this novel. I hope that in the unlikely event of any of them reading this book that they don't feel betrayed by what is mostly fictional. Meanwhile the 1976 heat wave and the swarm of ladybirds are exactly as I remember them and the political mood of the time was volatile. I'm very glad that the dire predictions of some political commentators of the time did not come to pa.s.s.

Also by Graham Joyce from Gollancz:.

Leningrad Nights.

Smoking Poppy.

The Limits of Enchantment.

The Facts of Life.

The Tooth Fairy.

Memoirs of a Master Forger (as William Heaney).

The Silent Land..

Some Kind of Fairy Tale.

end.