The Works of Robert G. Ingersoll Volume VIII Part 25

_Question_. "Do you believe in eternal punishment, as set forth in the confession of faith?"

_Answer_. (With some hesitation) "Yes, I do."

_Question_. "Have you preached on that subject lately?"

_Answer_. "No. I prepared a sermon on h.e.l.l, in which I took the ground that the punishment of the wicked will be endless, and have it with me."

_Question_. "Did you deliver it?"

_Answer_. "No. I thought that my congregation would not care to hear it. The doctrine is rather unpopular where I have been preaching, and I was afraid I might do harm, so I have not delivered it yet."

_Question_. "But you believe in eternal d.a.m.nation, do you not?"

_Answer_. "O yes, with all my heart."

He was admitted, and the admission proves the dishonesty of the examiners and the examined. The new version of the Old and New Testaments has done much to weaken confidence in the doctrine of inspiration. It has occurred to a good many that if G.o.d took the pains to inspire men to write the Bible, he ought to have inspired others to translate it correctly. The general tendency today is toward science, toward naturalism, toward what is called Infidelity, but is in fact fidelity. Men are in a transition state, and the people, on the average, have more real good, sound sense to-day than ever before. The church is losing its power for evil. The old chains are wearing out, and new ones are not being made. The tendency is toward intellectual freedom, and that means the final destruction of the orthodox bastille.

_Question_. What is your opinion of General Grant as he stands before the people to-day?

_Answer_. I have always regarded General Grant as the greatest soldier this continent has produced. He is to-day the most distinguished son of the Republic. The people have the greatest confidence in his ability, his patriotism and his integrity. The financial disaster impoverished General Grant, but he did not stain the reputation of the grand soldier who led to many victories the greatest army that ever fought for the liberties of man.

--_Iowa State Register_, May 23, 1885.

h.e.l.l OR SHEOL AND OTHER SUBJECTS.

_Question_. Colonel, have you read the revised Testament?

_Answer_. Yes, but I don't believe the work has been fairly done.

The clergy are not going to sc.r.a.pe the b.u.t.ter off their own bread.

The clergy are offensive partisans, and those of each denomination will interpret the Scriptures their way. No Baptist minister would countenance a "Revision" that favored sprinkling, and no Catholic priest would admit that any version would be correct that destroyed the dogma of the "real presence." So I might go through all the denominations.

_Question_. Why was the word sheol introduced in place of h.e.l.l, and how do you like the subst.i.tute?

_Answer_. The civilized world has outgrown the vulgar and brutal h.e.l.l of their fathers and founders of the churches. The clergy are ashamed to preach about sulphurous flames and undying worms.

The imagination of the world has been developed, the heart has grown tender, and the old dogma of eternal pain shocks all civilized people. It is becoming disgraceful either to preach or believe in such a beastly lie. The clergy are beginning to think that it is hardly manly to frighten children with a detected falsehood. Sheol is a great relief. It is not so hot as the old place. The nights are comfortable, and the society is quite refined. The worms are dead, and the air reasonably free from noxious vapors. It is a much worse word to hold a revival with, but much better for every day use. It will hardly take the place of the old word when people step on tacks, put up stoves, or sit on pins; but for use at church fairs and mite societies it will do about as well. We do not need revision; excision is what we want. The barbarism should be taken out of the Bible. Pa.s.sages upholding polygamy, wars of extermination, slavery, and religious persecution should not be attributed to a perfect G.o.d. The good that is in the Bible will be saved for man, and man will be saved from the evil that is in that book. Why should we worship in G.o.d what we detest in man?

_Question_. Do you think the use of the word sheol will make any difference to the preachers?

_Answer_. Of course it will make no difference with Talmage. He will make sheol just as hot and smoky and uncomfortable as h.e.l.l, but the congregations will laugh instead of tremble. The old shudder has gone. Beecher had demolished h.e.l.l before sheol was adopted. According to his doctrine of evolution h.e.l.l has been slowly growing cool. The cindered souls do not even perspire.

Sheol is nothing to Mr. Beecher but a new name for an old mistake.

As for the effect it will have on Heber Newton, I cannot tell, neither can he, until he asks his bishop. There are people who believe in witches and madstones and fiat money, and centuries hence it may be that people will exist who will believe as firmly in h.e.l.l as Dr. Shedd does now.

_Question_. What about Beecher's sermons on "Evolution"?

_Answer_. Beecher's sermons on "Evolution" will do good. Millions of people believe that Mr. Beecher knows at least as much as the other preachers, and if he regards the atonement as a dogma with a mistake for a foundation, they may conclude that the whole system is a mistake. But whether Mr. Beecher is mistaken or not, people know that honesty is a good thing, that grat.i.tude is a virtue, that industry supports the world, and that whatever they believe about religion they are bound by every conceivable obligation to be just and generous. Mr. Beecher can no more succeed in reconciling science and religion, than he could in convincing the world that triangles and circles are exactly the same. There is the same relation between science and religion that there is between astronomy and astrology, between alchemy and chemistry, between orthodoxy and common sense.

_Question_. Have you read Miss Cleveland's book? She condemns George Eliot's poetry on the ground that it has no faith in it, nothing beyond. Do you imagine she would condemn Burns or Sh.e.l.ley for that reason?

_Answer_. I have not read Miss Cleveland's book; but, if the author condemns the poetry of George Eliot, she has made a mistake. There is no poem in our language more beautiful than "The Lovers," and none loftier or purer than "The Choir Invisible." There is no poetry in the "beyond." The poetry is here--here in this world, where love is in the heart. The poetry of the beyond is too far away, a little too general. Sh.e.l.ley's "Skylark" was in our sky, the daisy of Burns grew on our ground, and between that lark and that daisy is room for all the real poetry of the earth.

--_Evening Record_, Boston, Ma.s.s., 1885.

INTERVIEWING, POLITICS AND SPIRITUALISM.

_Question_. What is your opinion of the peculiar inst.i.tution of American journalism known as interviewing?

_Answer_. If the interviewers are fair, if they know how to ask questions of a public nature, if they remember what is said, or write it at the time, and if the interviewed knows enough to answer questions in a way to amuse or instruct the public, then interviewing is a blessing. But if the representative of the press asks questions, either impudent or unimportant, and the answers are like the questions, then the inst.i.tution is a failure. When the journalist fails to see the man he wishes to interview, or when the man refuses to be interviewed, and thereupon the aforesaid journalist writes up an interview, doing the talking for both sides, the inst.i.tution is a success. Such interviews are always interesting, and, as a rule, the questions are to the point and the answers perfectly responsive. There is probably a little too much interviewing, and to many persons are asked questions upon subjects about which they know nothing. Mr. Smith makes some money in stocks or pork, visits London, and remains in that city for several weeks. On his return he is interviewd as to the inst.i.tutions, laws and customs of the British Empire. Of course such an interview is exceedingly instructive. Lord Affanaff lands at the dock in North River, is driven to a hotel in a closed carriage, is interviewed a few minutes after by a representative of the _Herald_ as to his view of the great Republic based upon what he has seen. Such an interview is also instructive. Interviews with candidates as to their chances of election is another favorite way of finding out their honest opinion, but people who rely on those interviews generally lose their bets. The most interesting interviews are generally denied.

I have been expecting to see an interview with the Rev. Dr. Leonard on the medicinal properties of champagne and toast, or the relation between old ale and modern theology, and as to whether prohibition prohibits the Prohibitionists.

_Question_. Have you ever been misrepresented in interviews?

_Answer_. Several times. As a general rule, the clergy have selected these misrepresentations when answering me. I never blamed them, because it is much easier to answer something I did not say.

Most reporters try to give my real words, but it is difficult to remember. They try to give the substance, and in that way change or destroy the sense. You remember the Frenchman who translated Shakespeare's great line in Macbeth--"Out, brief candle!"--into "Short candle, go out!" Another man, trying to give the last words of Webster--"I still live"--said "I aint dead yit." So that when they try to do their best they often make mistakes. Now and then interviews appear not one word of which I ever said, and sometimes when I really had an interview, another one has appeared.

But generally the reporters treat me well, and most of them succeed in telling about what I said. Personally I have no cause for complaint.

_Question_. What do you think of the administration of President Cleveland?

_Answer_. I know but very little about it. I suppose that he is doing the best he can. He appears to be carrying out in good faith the principles laid down in the platform on which he was elected.

He is having a hard road to travel. To satisfy an old Democrat and a new mugwump is a difficult job. Cleveland appears to be the owner of himself--appears to be a man of great firmness and force of character. The best thing that I have heard about him is that he went fishing on Sunday. We have had so much mock morality, dude deportment and hypocritical respectability in public office, that a man with courage enough to enjoy himself on Sunday is a refreshing and healthy example. All things considered I do not see but that Cleveland is doing well enough. The att.i.tude of the administration toward the colored people is manly and fair so far as I can see.

_Question_. Are you still a Republican in political belief?

_Answer_. I believe that this is a Nation. I believe in the equality of all men before the law, irrespective of race, religion or color. I believe that there should be a dollar's worth of silver in a silver dollar. I believe in a free ballot and a fair count.

I believe in protecting those industries, and those only, that need protection. I believe in unrestricted coinage of gold and silver.

I believe in the rights of the State, the rights of the citizen, and the sovereignty of the Nation. I believe in good times, good health, good crops, good prices, good wages, good food, good clothes and in the absolute and unqualified liberty of thought. If such belief makes a Republican, than that is what I am.

_Question_. Do you approve of John Sherman's policy in the present campaign with reference to the b.l.o.o.d.y shirt, which reports of his speeches show that he is waving?

_Answer_. I have not read Senator Sherman's speech. It seems to me that there is a better feeling between the North and South than ever before--better than at any time since the Revolutionary war.

I believe in cultivating that feeling, and in doing and saying what we can to contribute to its growth. We have hated long enough and fought enough. The colored people never have been well treated but they are being better treated now than ever before. It takes a long time to do away with prejudices that were based upon religion and rascality--that is to say, inspiration and interest. We must remember that slavery was the crime of the whole country. Now, if Senator Sherman has made a speech calculated to excite the hatreds and prejudices of the North and South, I think that he has made a mistake. I do not say that he has made such a speech, because I have not read it. The war is over--it ended at Appomattox. Let us hope that the bitterness born of the conflict died out forever at Riverside. The people are tired almost to death of the old speeches. They have been worn out and patched, and even the patches are threadbare. The Supreme Court decided the Civil Rights Bill to be unconst.i.tutional, and the Republican party submitted. I regarded the decision as monstrous, but the Republican party when in power said nothing and did nothing. I most sincerely hope that the Democratic party will protect the colored people at least as well as we did when we were in power. But I am out of politics and intend to keep politics out of me.

_Question_. We have been having the periodical revival of interest in Spiritualism. What do you think of "Spiritualism," as it is popularly termed?

_Answer_. I do not believe in the supernatural. One who does not believe in G.o.ds would hardly believe in ghosts. I am not a believer in any of the "wonders" and "miracles" whether ancient or modern.

There may be spirits, but I do not believe there are. They may communicate with some people, but thus far they have been successful in avoiding me. Of course, I know nothing for certain on the subject. I know a great many excellent people who are thoroughly convinced of the truth of Spiritualism. Christians laugh at the "miracles" to-day, attested by folks they know, but believe the miracles of long ago, attested by folks that they did not know.

This is one of the contradictions in human nature. Most people are willing to believe that wonderful things happened long ago and will happen again in the far future; with them the present is the only time in which nature behaves herself with becoming sobriety.

In old times nature did all kinds of juggling tricks, and after a long while will do some more, but now she is attending strictly to business, depending upon cause and effect.

_Question_. Who, in your opinion, is the greatest leader of the "opposition" yclept the Christian religion?

_Answer_. I suppose that Mr. Beecher is the greatest man in the pulpit, but he thinks more of Darwin than he does of David and has an idea that the Old Testament is just a little too old. He has put evolution in the place of the atonement--has thrown away the Garden of Eden, snake, apples and all, and is endeavoring to save enough of the orthodox wreck to make a raft. I know of no other genius in the pulpit. There are plenty of theological doctors and bishops and all kinds of t.i.tled humility in the sacred profession, but men of genius are scarce. All the ministers, except Messrs.

Moody and Jones, are busy explaining away the contradiction between inspiration and demonstration.