The Winter Moon's Wolf Part 20

Now what Dean had said made sense and it made his stomach roll with self-loathing. There had been no choice, no warning, and definitely no discussion of it at all. "I didn't mean to do that to him. It was... It just happened!" He planted his face into uplifted palms and shuddered. He had no idea it would work against Dean, not just for for Cade. "I thought it would all work itself out. He's the one the wolf chose. How could it be wrong?" Cade. "I thought it would all work itself out. He's the one the wolf chose. How could it be wrong?"

"The wolf? Don't you want him?" Chris asked, tension subduing his voice in concern.

Cade lurched upright. "What's that mean?"

Chris studied him. "Are you gay? Are you bi? How do you feel about Dean being male?"

Cade swallowed thickly. "I'm not gay. I know that." Cade didn't understand what the difference was. He wanted to be with Dean. He cared for him. The wolf wanted him. Why did he have to say he was gay? Why did it matter?

Chris didn't comment, only scowling in deepening disappointment. Quade wasn't as lenient. "What do you mean by that?"

"What difference does it make?" Cade snapped, growing irritated.

Quade pushed. "Because it means everything to Dean. If you're not gay, or at least willing to be open to loving a man, then you've pushed Dean into a corner."

Cade shoved away from the table. "I don't need this!"

"Sit. Down."

All three heads whipped to land gazes on Jamie. Fire sparked in his blue eyes.

"Sit your s.h.i.thead a.s.s down." He approached the table but didn't take his seat. "All three of you are s.h.i.thead animals." Chris twitched. "Don't even think it."

"What did I do?" Chris gaped at him.

"I'll talk to you later," Jamie warned. He stood over Cade and pinned him to his seat with a steely glare. "Let me put this bluntly. Dean is human. He is not pack pack. He He is is gay. He is half in love with you whether he wants to admit it or not. You, you cretin, bonded him. A human. Let that sink in." Jamie scowled at all of them. gay. He is half in love with you whether he wants to admit it or not. You, you cretin, bonded him. A human. Let that sink in." Jamie scowled at all of them.

Chris reached for Jamie's hand. "Baby?"

"No, you and I are fine. We had a different tangent to get to this point." He squeezed once then released him. "Cade on the other hand." He sighed. "I can't tell you what Dean sees or what he's thinking, but I can take a d.a.m.n good shot in the dark. He's dealing with seven kinds of s.h.i.t right now, and you just told him that you'd go with him, anywhere, because you're bonded. Oh, gee. Thanks." Jamie scoffed, rolling his eyes in sheer exasperation. "And then you have the nerve to emphasize the fact that you're not really really gay, but hey, he's what the wolf wants." gay, but hey, he's what the wolf wants."

Cade slouched. "That's not-"

"Trust me, that's what he heard. That's exactly what you just told your brothers. I heard every word, and a few from the argument with Dean. If you're only with him because the wolf chose him then you've f.u.c.ked up bad."

"Look, I've tried to figure this out."

Jamie leaned on his knuckles and got in Cade's face. "Try. Harder. Telling him to his face that you can't do more because you can't accept that it will make you gay, is bulls.h.i.t. Whichever s.e.xuality label you feel most comfortable with, doesn't matter. What does matter is that you're open to loving him as a man."

Cade felt heat on his cheeks as memories flashed before him.

"Oh, G.o.d!" Jamie cried, throwing up his hands. "Not for s.e.x! Are you really that dense?"

"Sorry. It was the first thing to pop into my mind." He rolled a shoulder, biting the embarra.s.sed smile off before it could grow. "It really wasn't intentional."

"No wonder he lost patience with you tonight." Jamie put a hand on Cade's shoulder. "Quit using the wolf as your scapegoat to being in a same-s.e.x relationship. You are more than the wolf you carry."

"But...women...since I was fourteen," Cade choked, rife with confusion. "And now...this?" He thought he'd handled it, now it was looking like all he'd done was buried his head in the sand trying to make it go away.

Jamie lowered to a crouch, searching upward into Cade's eyes. "That's something only you can answer. It was the one thing only I could answer."

Cade looked across the table. Both Chris and Quade were silent. Cade's head ached as much as his heart and neither were giving him any answers.

"Was it something I did?" Quade asked cautiously.

"Of course not," Cade a.s.serted.

"We always challenged each other," Quade said, not convinced.

"That's what brothers do," Chris said. "But no, it wasn't anything you did. Neither of you could influence me on that level. Quade, you did nothing to Cade."

Cade nodded, rubbing his temples. "But that's where... Geez. You knew knew." He raised his chin a fraction to find Chris across from him. "I thought...and now I don't know anymore."

Jamie enveloped him in a close hug. Cade leaned into that hold, lost.

"I think you do know," he said gently. "You can do this. It's you caring for him, not the wolf telling you it's what you have to do."

"I know." Cade really shouldn't be making it sound like the only reason he was with Dean was because the wolf had picked him. It sounded like he'd been chosen out of a police lineup! No wonder he'd been hurt and insulted. h.e.l.l, he'd have reacted worse and he knew it.

He sighed, maybe not any closer to accepting, but he knew he was getting closer to understanding all of this, himself especially. "So I guess saying sorry, again, is a good place to start?"

Jamie stroked his hair. "Sorry is usually a safe place, yes." He winked toward Chris. "We all have practice with that one."

"Is it safe?" Maya peeked around the rear hallway. "You're all alive. That's good."

Quade chuckled and held out a hand for her. "It's safe. Where'd you go?"

"I didn't think Cade would want to feel ganged up on, so I went to go share secrets with Bear." She scooted in to sit on Quade's lap. He scrubbed her hands between his larger ones to warm them up. She'd snuck out without her jacket, so Cade bet she was cold. He almost envied his brother in that moment, having that closeness.

Jamie gave a last squish of a squeeze and he joined Chris, leaning into his side rather than claiming his lap. Chris circled him with an arm at his hips, framing his waist, as close as they could get.

Now that most of Cade's crises were handled, or at least illuminated enough for him to deal with, Cade studied both couples as they began to relax and chat quietly. All of them were comfortable in their skin, in their pairings. It didn't matter the s.e.x, because they were more than bonded. They were in love. Cade could see it.

It didn't matter.

He rubbed a hand down his face. "I have to go." Before he said what he was thinking out loud. He never wanted to have to say it. It was enough that he finally recognized what it was holding him back. Knowing it didn't make him like the truth anymore, either.

Sliding behind the steering wheel of the vet truck, he corrected himself. There was one person he owed the full truth to. There was one person who deserved to know what this revelation was, because it would affect the both of them, and everything they were meant to be.

Cade just hoped Dean would listen.

Chapter Sixteen.

Dean unlocked his front door to get inside and went to hit the light switch. "f.u.c.k!" In aggravation, he flipped it a few more times, but no, nothing changed. No lights. "Son of a b.i.t.c.h." He'd dropped off his parents at their hotel after a tense ride to Ca.s.san. He knew his mother was itching to pry into the argument he'd had with Cade, but she'd somehow managed to not badger him. After all of that, he comes home to a dark house.

Walking inside, he wondered how long the power had been out. He aimed for the kitchen and opened the freezer. A cloud of cold popped out. Not long. Good. Good. He started pawing through drawers looking for the flashlight. He knew he had one. He really hoped it had batteries that worked. He started pawing through drawers looking for the flashlight. He knew he had one. He really hoped it had batteries that worked.

He used the screen light from his phone for a dim halo as he searched. He slammed the drawer shut. It wasn't there. d.a.m.n it, where did he put it last time?

The temperature was dropping without the heater kicking on. He could feel it against bare skin. He started digging in another drawer. Wind pushed against the house, making it creak and groan. Sounded like another front. Not a good night to have lost power.

Hunting in another drawer, his back was turned to the hallway to the second half of the house. It wasn't a very large home, a single-wide trailer. Three bedrooms with the kitchen and living room separating them, and one of those rooms was nothing but storage. He wasn't even close to being the first owner, but like he'd told Cade, how much did he really need? He'd shared a place with Daniel, but after his death, he'd needed something that wasn't a constant reminder when he had Gemini's for that.

Maybe the phone could give off enough light to at least check the breaker box. There had to be a reason it went out. The bill had been paid, so it had to be something electrical.

He glanced out the kitchen window to the front yard. It was dark, overcast, and the wind was picking up surface powder and tossing it around like a dust storm. There was something definitely moving in. The last good snowfall had been several days before, which meant they were due for the next wave.

He shivered. He did not want to be in a powerless house overnight. His phone started singing. He sent the call to voicemail, well aware by the tone who was calling. He wasn't ready to talk to Cade. Dean was still p.i.s.sed at him, with plenty of reasons to stay that way.

His hand lowered.

The instantly biting pressure around his neck shocked him. He jerked for it with a clawed hand as it painfully started to slice through skin.

The stranglehold held him immobile, pinned between the body behind him and the counter before him.

Scratching at the thin wire around his neck was pointless as the pressure increased. His jaw ached as he clenched his teeth, jerking his body to unbalance the man behind him. They struggled, weaving and bouncing around the kitchen.

Dean hunted with a hand but couldn't get enough backward lean to find the man's head. Air was beginning to burn as he labored to breathe. His throat felt on fire. The line of pain was intense. Each jerk of limbs, of bodies, sawed the wire a little deeper into soft flesh.

He bent and spun, unable to shake the weight of the clinging man. The garrote was anchoring him to Dean.

Sparks popped in front of his eyes, scattering like wild comets.

The level of pain bursting from the pressing slice of the garrote had never been felt in his life. He refused to give in to it.

They crashed into the refrigerator, toppling things to the floor from above as they struggled. A few things shattered, or rolled. He didn't have the capacity place what they had been. He tried to trip his attacker, but there just wasn't a way to take him off balance. The man avoided elbows like a matador avoided horns. He pulled on arms, yanked on clothing; he had absolutely no leverage to disentangle the person behind him.

A knock on the door was followed by, "Dean, open up. I'm sorry."

Dean almost pa.s.sed out as the pressure increased with deadly intent into his neck. No more drawing it out. The man behind him wanted to finish this. Like a twist tie was being wound behind his neck, the noose shrank, cutting deeper. He pushed with one last gathering of strength, knocking them both into the refrigerator again. It shuddered and shook. They rebounded into the wall, creating an explosive thud thud. He gasped as the pressure moved, increased, jumped. Seared his flesh. He felt the slick slice as it dug deeper into skin. He was losing.

He was going to die.

"Dean!" Cade rattled the door impatiently.

His vision was going gray. The darkness surrounding him thickened. His chest raged with the strain.

The door exploded inward with a hard boot kick.

His legs went out from under him, unable to hold his weight any longer. His lungs screamed for air. His throat... Blood. It was soaking his front. Pain. Aching numbness.

An unholy growl was followed by a cry. The tension around his neck vanished. He collapsed face first to the floor, gasping, holding a hand to his throat. He shuddered in agony and then darkness enveloped him.

Cade stopped behind Dean's car. The house was utterly dark. He had to be home. Cade didn't think he had that much of a head start on him that he'd already be in bed, but maybe he was.

It felt eerie, though. There was absolutely no no light, from anywhere around the house. Cade frowned. A sense of disquiet pervaded the air. Wind blew, but the rest...felt... light, from anywhere around the house. Cade frowned. A sense of disquiet pervaded the air. Wind blew, but the rest...felt...off.

He climbed the steps and knocked on the door. "Dean. Open up. I'm sorry."

He waited, listening, hoping Dean would give him one more chance. Expecting a light to pop on, he stood on the step. A loud thud caught his attention, locking his muscles in antic.i.p.ation. The impact rocked the whole trailer. "Dean!" He tried the k.n.o.b, cursing that it was locked.

"Forgive me if I'm wrong," he whispered. He kicked in the door.

Pitch black filled the house to every corner, with only the slightest tinge of illumination through the windows. Harsh panting and scuffled feet whipped his head in the direction of the kitchen.

He barely acknowledged the growl when it filled his throat. A running start. His entire body launching through the air. The crash crash they made as he took the man to the ground. It was disjointed and done completely instinctively. Cade held him down with a relentless grip and punched him. Just once. He went limp instantly. they made as he took the man to the ground. It was disjointed and done completely instinctively. Cade held him down with a relentless grip and punched him. Just once. He went limp instantly.

"Dean!" He shook the man he straddled then lurched away. "Dean! Talk to me!"

Scrambling over the person's body, he reached Dean's side, ignoring the oddities on the floor. Blood ran from the wound around his neck. "Dean!" He hunted for a pulse and almost sobbed when he found it.

"I got you," he whispered. With care, Cade rolled him to his side, jerking off his coat to rest his head on then tried to see what he could find to staunch the blood coming from his wounded neck. He dug kitchen towels out of the drawer and used them to pack against Dean's throat. "Stay with me, babe. Please." The bleeding was lessening. That was a good sign. He hadn't reached a vein or artery.

Withdrawing his phone, he called for emergency. His own panting was slowly evening out from sheer panic.

Cade kept a finger to Dean's pulse and a hawk's watch on his breathing. So many things could happen. Blood into his lungs, a collapsed pa.s.sage... He tried hard to not let those thoughts distract his vigilance over him.

Lights and sirens eventually lit up the frozen world outside the gaping doorway.

"In here!" Cade shouted. He hadn't moved from Dean's side, and wasn't about to. Not until they were ready to put him on the stretcher for the trip to the hospital. "I'll be right behind you, babe." He kissed Dean's forehead and let the EMTs take him away.

The wire had done a lot of damage. His anger boiled up again when he saw it as the EMTs started to treat him beneath better lights with a wrap to slow blood.

"Why is it so dark?" Officer Archer was playing with the light switch. They'd dragged out Dean's a.s.sailant in cuffs, still groggy and incoherent.

"I don't know. It was like this when I got here." He gathered his coat, kicking the kitchen towels to the side to be picked up and tossed later. "I'm following that ambulance. You deal with whoever you have in handcuffs."

"Will you be with him?"

"For the rest of my life," Cade said, waiting to be challenged.

Kelly grunted. "I'll be in touch in the morning to see if he's awake. I'll have questions for both of you by then."

"By then, I might have answers," Cade replied. He checked for his phone, spotting Dean's on the floor. He grabbed it and dropped it into a pocket. "Close the door on your way out." He had absolutely zilch desire to stay behind to help where he could do less than nothing. At least with Dean he could keep him company, and keep his own heart from shriveling in agonizing fear.

He jogged from the house for his truck. He didn't care what the police did. The only person that mattered was being carried away by the ambulance ahead of him.