The Tithe-Proctor Part 17

"Well, John," said O'Driscol, after once more placing himself with his usual pomp in his magisterial chair, "have you been able to find any account or trace of the a.s.sa.s.sin?"

"None whatever, sir," replied Purcel; "neither tale nor tidings of him could I find."

"When did you see him, Hourigan?" asked Fergus; "was it on your way here?"

"Yes, sir."

"In the avenue?"

"In the avenue, sir, about fifty yards inside the hedge, jist opposite the hollies."

"Why did you not speak to him?"

"Troth, sir, he had too suspicious a look; for how did I know but it's a bullet I'd get into, me, if I was only seen obsarvin' or watchin' him?"

"Then you did not speak to him?" asked Fergus.

"Faith, you may swear that, sir; that is not the time to pick up strange acquaintances."

The two young friends were now satisfied of Hourigan's falsehood, and perhaps of his treachery; and a very slight but significant glance to that effect pa.s.sed between them.

"Well, well," said the magistrate, "we--I mane myself, at any rate--are well able to protect ourselves. I shall not in future travel unarmed, and he that--hem--ahem--he that will mistake me for a timid man will find out his error maybe when it's too late. Come, Hourigan, what charge is this you have against Mr. Purcel?"

"Plaise your honor, he abused, and a.s.saulted, and bate me until I didn't know for a time whether I was alive or dead."

"How was that, Hourigan, sir?"

"Bekaise, your honor, I had not my tides for him."

"Now that I look at you, you certainly have the marks of violence about you. Well, but did you give no provocation, sir? It's not likely Mr. Purcel would raise his hand to you if he had not resaved strong provocation at yours."

"Sorra word, then, your honor, ever I said to him,--barrin' to tell him that I hoped he'd have compa.s.sion on me and my little family, and not drive us to ruin for what I wasn't able to pay. He then asked me, was that the answer I had for him, and not his money, and he does no more but ups wid his whip and laves me as you see me."

"Why, now, you d--d scoundrel!" exclaimed John, "how can you--"

"Pardon me, Mr. Purcel," said the magistrate, interrupting him with what he intended to be dignity, "you forget what is due to the court, sir.

There must be no swearing nor abuse here. The court must be respected, Mr. Purcel."

These words brought a sneer of secret triumph upon Hourigan's features, that was unquestionably very provoking.

"I beg to apologize to the court," replied Purcel, "if for a moment I have forgotten what is due to it; but, in fact, your worship, there is not one word of truth in what he says. His language was insolent and provoking beyond the limits of human patience. He told me that both my father and myself were dishonest--that we were oppressors of the poor, and blood-suckers; called us hardhearted and beggarly upstarts, and that we would sell our Church and our country for filthy lucre and upstart pride. Instead, your worship, of promising to pay his t.i.thes, he said we might go to h.e.l.l for them, and make the devil our paymaster, what he'll be yet. And further, he said he'd never pay a farthing of them, and set law, lawyers, police, military, and magistrates all at open defiance.

Now I beg to know, your worship, what loyal and peaceably-disposed man, that wishes to see the laws of his country, and those respectable magistrates that administer them, respected--what man, I say, fond of peace and quietness, could bear such language as that? It is not what he said of either myself or my family that I contain of, but of the abuse he heaped upon the law at large, and the independent magistrates of the country. I certainly, in the heat of the moment, so far resented the affront offered to the most respectable magistracy of this fine country as to give him a few slight touches of the whip, more like one in jest, I a.s.sure your worship, than like an angry man."

"Hourigan," said O'Driscol, swelling up to a state of the most pompous indignation, "this is infamous conduct which he relates of you, sir. How dare you, sir, or any impudent fellow like you, take the undaicent and unjustifiable liberty of abusing the independent and loyal magistracy of Ireland? It is by fellows like you, sir, that traison and sedition are hatched. Your conduct was gross and monstrous, and if Mr. Purcel had come to me and made affidavit of the language stated, I would have consithered it my duty to commit you. Such language, sirra, was seditious!"

"Yes," replied Hourigan, "and you would be right; but there is not one word of truth in what Mr. Purcel says, your worship; for instead of that, plaise your reverence, when I threatened to come to you to get the law against him--'I'll go to Squire Driscol,' says I, 'and that's the gintleman that will give me justice at any rate.' 'You and Squire Driscol may go be hanged,' says he; 'I don't regard him a traneen; he thinks, since he has been made into a justice of pace, that the ground's not worthy to carry him,' says he. Can you deny that, Mr. John?"

Purcel's limbs began to move, and his very flesh to creep with indignation at the impudent but artful falsehoods of Hourigan, who was likely to succeed in touching the magistrate's weak points with such effect as to gain him over to his side.

The worthy official shook his head with a kind of very high-minded pride, as much as to say, I am far above the level of such observations.

"Mr. Purcel," said he--"he--hem--hem--I am sorry to hear that you could give way to such extramely indiscreet and disrespectful language as this."

"Swear him, sir," said Purcel, "and let him be put to his oath, for I protest to heaven, Mr. O'Driscol, and as I am, I trust, an honest man, I never once mentioned your name, nor was there the slightest allusion made to it--none, sir, whatever."

"The truth is, I should think it very, strange, Mr. Purcel, and very odd, and very unfriendly and disenganious in you to spake of any magistrate in such a style as that. However, Sam, take the book and swear Hourigan."

Sam accordingly took the book, and putting it into Hourigan's hand, said, "You shall make true answers to such questions as shall be put to you, and swear the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you G.o.d, and one-and-sixpence to me!"

"Never mind the one-and-sixpence at present, Sam," said his master, "he owes you nothing now. Proceed."

Hourigan's thumb had the genuine angle on the back of the book, but it did not escape Sam, who said, "You intend to kiss your thumb, Hourigan, but it's no go; here, sir, stand there, so that the book won't be a screen for you; turn round--there now--proceed."

Hourigan, finding that the evasion in this instance was impracticable, gave it a strong, derisive smack that might be heard outside the room.

"I hope," he added, "you are satisfied now, Mr. Finigan."

"I see," replied Sam, "that you've kissed the book when you were made to do it; but I see jist as clearly that the sorra much truth are we goin'

to get out of yoU."

The case then proceeded; but as it would prove, probably, rather tiresome to the generality of our readers, we shall not give it at length. It was quite evident, however, that the plaintiff and defendant both were well acquainted with the vacillating and timid character of the magistrate, who in the case before us was uniformly swayed by the words of the last speaker; and it was equally evident that each speaker so shaped his arguments as that they might the more effectually bear upon O'Driscol's weak points.

"Hem--hem--this, I persave, turns out to be a very important and difficult case, Mr. Purcel--a very difficult case, Hourigan--a--a--a case indeed that requires great deliberation and coolness. Here is strong provocation on one hand, and prompt punishment on the other. Can you swear, Mr. Purcel, to the accuracy and substance of the language you say Hourigan uttered?"

"Certainly, sir, without hesitation."

"Because if he does, Hourigan, I shall be obliged, according to Act of Parliament, sir--"

Hourigan interrupted him by a groan, and a rather significant shrug.

"What do you shrug and groan for, sir?" asked the man of law, who felt both acts incompatible with the respect due to the court.

"Mavrone!" exclaimed Hourigan, "acts of Parliament! oh! thin many a bitther piece of cruelty and injustice has been practised upon us by Act o' Parliament!"

"Ho, you traisonable villain!" exclaimed the other--"what sedition is this?"

"It is sich Acts o' Parliament," said the adroit knave, "that gets good men and good magistrates shot like dogs, an' that has brought the counthry to the fearful pa.s.s it's in, I wisht myself I was out of it, for the people is beginnin' to single out sich magistrates as they'll shoot, as if their lives worn't worth a rat's."

"Ah!--hem--hem--Hourigan, you are a d--d ras--hem simple-hearted fellow, I think, or you wouldn't spake as you do.

"But an I to get not justice sir, against the man that left me as you see me. Is the poor man, sir, to be horse-whipped and cut up at the will an' pleasure of the rich, an'not to get either law or justice?"

O'Driscol's face was now a picture of most ludicrous embarra.s.sment and distress.

"Certainly, Hourigan, I shall--hem--I shall always administer justice impartially--impartially--no one can question that. Your case," he added--(for we must say here that Hourigan's language brought back to his mind all the horrors of Tandrem's death, as well as that threatened to himself in the recent notice)--"your case, Hourigan is a difficult and peculiar one, poor man!"

"Hourigan, my good fellow," said Purcel, "take care of what you are about. Don't be too certain that some of your neighbors won't find you, before you are much older, in the centre of a deep-laid conspiracy; and perhaps the government of the country may have an opportunity before long to thank and reward those who will have it exposed and broken up.

Do you understand me?"

Purcel, while he spoke, kept his eyes fixed very significantly upon the magistrate, to whose imagination a long and interesting correspondence with his friend, the Castle, started immediately forth, appended to which were votes of thanks, flattering testimonies, together with a stipendiary magistracy, with a full retiring pension, and an appointment for his son, in the background.