The Tale of Lal Part 38

"It was never intended to be published at all."

"Never intended to be read in Court, of course?"

"_Never_, in the way it was read."

"Thank you, that is enough," whereupon the Writer vanished gracefully from the witness-box.

After this period in the proceedings, if the Learned Judge slumbered only fitfully during Mr. Dreadful's final peroration, it might have been owing to the spasmodic explosions of that Counsel's voice; but there could be no doubt that the Learned Judge slept peacefully during the earlier portions of Mr. Gentle Gammon's final effort upon behalf of his client.

The Learned Judge had, however, a curious habit of hearing particular things in his sleep, which, like the highly intelligent house-dog, might have been either the result of long training or a naturally keen possession of the intuitive faculty. His Lordship found frequent occasion, therefore, to arouse himself in order to interpolate remarks during the latter half of Mr. Gentle Gammon's closing speech.

"Who are these sceptics?" demanded Mr. Gammon, "these disbelievers?"

After all they had heard that afternoon, might they not verily be approaching that blissful period when the Lion should lie down with the Lamb?...

_His Lordship_ (opening one eye). "But it seems, according to evidence, that the Lion didn't always lie down; it stood up and gave a party."

Counsel proceeds: he had not quite finished the beautiful and well-known simile; here Counsel paused before continuing in a voice mellowed by winning tenderness--

"And the little child shall lead them."

_Judge_ (again interrupting). "No, no, the Lion, according to evidence, distinctly led the children, even took them to Balham, we gather, in the direction of the tram-lines."

_Counsel_. "Your Lordship is pleased to interrupt my remarks."

_Judge_. "No, no, not pleased at all; quite the contrary."

_Counsel_. "I am sorry to have encountered your Lordship's displeasure."

_His Lordship_ (irritably). "You have not encountered anything yet, save an inability to deal with the evidence, as evidence."

_Counsel_. "But, my Lord------"

_His Lordship_. "Hush, do not contradict me. Please continue; I shall not interrupt again."

_Counsel_. "I thank your Lordship for that a.s.surance."

_His Lordship_. "Please do not thank me, and do not provoke me."

_Counsel_ (proceeds, slightly ruffled). He would take another case of Biblical history; it was without question an a.s.s who had upon a certain occasion been the one to see when a Lion had stood in his path. Here the case was unhappily reversed; it was only the a.s.ses who couldn't see the Lion, as he ought to be seen in this case.

_His Lordship_. "No, I cannot see that."

_Counsel_. "Your Lordship only makes my remarks more pointed than I actually intended."

_His Lordship_. "Please do not set cheap traps or you may one day get caught in them yourself."

_Counsel_ (gallantly). "In that case, I can only hope that your Lordship may be there to extricate me by the nimbleness of your wit."

_His Lordship_ (beaming round upon the Court, and especially upon Counsel). "Very pleasant, very clever; your speech interests me very much; pray continue!"

_Learned Counsel_ (continuing). "Shakespeare, our best guide, philosopher, poet, thinker, and prophet, had fitly and most appropriately even foretold this very matter with regard to the Lion; maybe had prophesied it, when he told us there were sermons in stone and good in everything."

_Judge_ (awakening, after dozing). "Good gracious! I always understood it was bronze."

_Counsel_. "Ahem! Yes, my Lord, that is to say stone pedestal, bronze beast."

_His Lordship_. "Very well, but when you quote for a purpose always quote with exact correctness."

_Counsel_ (proceeds). "Did not the creature his Lordship had referred to as the great Pyg--Pyg--Pyg-----"

_His Lordship_ (prompting). "No, no, not a pig, a Lion."

_Counsel_ (bows, and with a supreme effort of memory recollects the word Pygmalion). "Had not the great Pygmalion so created Galatea that she verily became endowed with life, and may we not suppose that the genius of Sir Edwin Landseer, or whoever carved this wondrous lifelike Lion, might not also have endowed it with some such strange new form of existence? Was it reasonable to suppose that what had happened to Beauty might not also happen to the Beast? Take the simple exquisite statement of this child, this little boy Ridgwell, confirmed by his sister."

_Judge_ (prompting). "No, no, you can only be actually confirmed by a Bishop."

_Counsel_. "I spoke of another confirmation, my Lord."

_His Lordship_. "Well, the issue, the issue, what does it show?"

_Counsel_. "My Lord, I will explain at some length carefully."

His Lordship immediately relapses into another short but placid slumber.

_Counsel_. "This child Ridgwell, with the imagination worthy of Christian in the _Pilgrim's Progress_, states simply, and you have heard for yourselves how beautifully, that the Lion walked and talked with him; and as I have used the touching ill.u.s.tration of the Pilgrim's Progress, with which you are all familiar, I say this child is not alone in his belief that the Lion came to life. There are others to testify, others to write of it, among them a well-known Writer and Poet. This Lion has not been left without a Bunyan."

_His Lordship_ (waking almost with a start). "No, no! ridiculous; you are mixing matters. All the Lion had was a swelling in the foot caused by a thorn--I know the fable well."

_Counsel_. "My Lord, believe me, I spoke of a different matter."

_His Lordship_. "Well, you must not really wander from the point, it makes it almost impossible for me to follow you, and if I cannot follow you I don't know where you will be."

_Counsel_ (glibly). "I trust it is I who will always follow your Lordship, and be led, as it were, by your Lordship."

_His Lordship_ (obviously highly pleased). "Very true, and very aptly expressed. Pray do not let me interrupt you."

_Counsel_ (bowing). "Your Lordship's remarks are in themselves a Commentary, and worthy of all preservation."

_His Lordship_ (almost playfully). "Exceedingly apt. But I must refuse to be prejudiced by your clever advocacy."

_Counsel_. "And now we come to the touching and beautiful story of the Lord Mayor of London, the Right Worshipful" (with a rising inflexion of admiration in his voice), "who, after many years, had been knighted like d.i.c.k Whittington."

_His Lordship_. "What has d.i.c.k Whittington and his Cat to do with the present Lord Mayor of London and the Lion?"

_Counsel_. "Nothing, my Lord, save that----"

_His Lordship_. "Then please omit it; we have had enough of the fairy tale element in this trial without the introduction of any fresh fairy stories or nursery rhymes whatever."

_Counsel_ (continues blandly, as if unconscious of interruption). "The Right Worshipful knew, and had always known, that one Lion was different to the others. One only, the one present in Court, was intelligent, a companion; the other three were _deaf_."