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The Sexual Life Of The Child Part 10

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The following advertis.e.m.e.nts belong to the second group: "Boy of seven to be placed under simple and scrupulous care, for the purposes of energetic education (premium paid)." "Boys and girls of a fair age received in a strict and severe boarding-school." "A strict, disciplinary master required to teach English at a preparatory school for the Army." The following advertis.e.m.e.nts are extremely suspicious: "A fairly well-educated gentleman offers _energetic_ gratuitous supplementary instruction." "Severe education for boys and girls; energetic gentleman offers also free supplementary lessons."

"_Distinguished_, experienced lady gives advice and help in difficult educational questions; defects of character, &c., treated with success."

"Advertiser recommends himself for the severe chastis.e.m.e.nt of naughty children."

Many advertis.e.m.e.nts worded as above, or similarly, are, as was pointed out above, shown by the context to be seriously meant, and must not then be interpreted as perverse; but in the absence of such a context, the use of the catch-words so well known to s.e.xual perverts would have rendered them highly suspicious. "_Education of Boys_, strict if necessary, diligence at school, school-work under continuous control, &c." This advertis.e.m.e.nt was probably not issued with perverse intent, since the advertiser's full name and address were given, and a number of additional details suggested that it was seriously meant. The same is true of the following advertis.e.m.e.nts: "Private tutor, elderly, experienced, severe instructor, holds cla.s.ses, and also takes private pupils." "Daily supplementary lessons desired by a student in the fourth form of the Gymnasium [School] at X. An energetic and experienced governess wanted." "An experienced and energetic governess, thoroughly competent in the English language, very musical, desires morning or afternoon employment as teacher of children or adults." "_Officer_ desires board with small family, preferably with authority over sons, with whom strict care would gladly be taken." "Some pupils under eleven years of age wanted to live with our own well-behaved children--no objection to those difficult to manage. Energetic a.s.sistance, strict individual instruction in the family, &c." The last few advertis.e.m.e.nts are appended in ill.u.s.tration, although the context (which is not in all cases given in its entirety) shows that they had no perverse intent.

Speaking generally, in view of the significance attached by s.e.xual perverts to the words "energetic," "strict," "severe," "English methods," "discipline," &c., it will be wise, alike for those offering and for those seeking instruction, to exercise the utmost care when there is any possibility of mistake; as thus only is it possible to avoid being misled by the overtures of perverts.



Advertis.e.m.e.nts belonging to the third group, some examples of which will now be given, have of late become much rarer. Here are some: "Distinguished, energetic lady desires fairly old boys and girls for strict education." "_Distinguished_ lady desires a child of fair age (girl by preference), to receive into the house for strict education and training." "_Distinguished_ lady wishes to undertake the strict care and education of children of fair age, boys and girls, whose relatives have gone abroad." "_Artist_ offers to teach French and English, strict and energetic." "_Strict_, _energetic_ tutor desires children of fair age for strict education." "_Energetic_ widow desires a boy of fair age and of good family, for strict education. Apply 'energetic,' Post-Office, No.----." "_Girl_, seven years old, received by energetic lady for strict education." "_Tutor_ undertakes, gratuitously, strict education of growing children; especially suitable for cultured widow, who lacks herself the requisite energy. Unexceptionable references." "Pupils requiring energetic management, even if fairly old, received by a gentleman for _strict education_." "Half-grown girl received in _strict board_ by a governess." The perverse character of these advertis.e.m.e.nts is rendered unmistakable by the fact that the catch-words are all italicised. "_Naughty_ children; recommended for severe discipline; replies to 'Free.'" "_Governess_, from England, recommends her admirable boarding establishment for pupils of fair age. Apply 'Hearneshouse.'" No doubt is possible in this case, since "Hearneshouse" is the t.i.tle of a s.a.d.i.s.tic novel. "Strict task-mistress wanted for a naughty girl of fourteen. Those replying to this advertis.e.m.e.nt should describe their methods of instruction." Here it is obvious that the advertiser hopes for s.e.xual excitement from reading the descriptions of chastis.e.m.e.nt for which he asks. "_English_, strict method, offered by gentleman."

"Highly cultured lady seeks position as English gouvernante. Delight William, Post Office, No.----." "_Governess Housekeeper_; cultured and distinguished lady wanted, good-looking, age twenty to twenty-eight, for the education of two motherless children, knowledge of English language required. Good presence requisite, and must be extremely energetic."

Here it is possible that the advertiser really wants a housekeeper; but the advertis.e.m.e.nt is perverse in character. "_Governess_, youthful, energetic, very strict, either Englishwoman or Frenchwoman, wanted for spoiled children. Very good salary." "_Energetic gentleman_, severe disciplinarian, offers _English instruction_ to boys and girls of fair age." No shadow of doubt is possible as to the perverse nature of this last advertis.e.m.e.nt. The same is true of the one that follows: "_Gentleman_ offers strict instruction to older boys. Replies to 'English,' c/o Office of this paper."

An advertis.e.m.e.nt which appeared about four years ago in a Hamburg paper had a tragi-comic sequel. It ran as follows: "Difficult educational opportunity. Advertiser, residing in Hanover, with pretty daughter of twelve years, wishes to place her under strict discipline in the care of a widow with a daughter of similar age. Arrangements must be made to enable the advertiser herself to stay with the lady in Hamburg when visiting that town from time to time. In replying to the office of this paper, give a detailed account of the methods of punishment." A gentleman who suspected that this advertis.e.m.e.nt was issued by a s.e.xual pervert, and was anxious about the future of the child, sent a reply in the simulated handwriting of a woman. The answer he received showed that the child was, in fact, being subjected to perverse maltreatment, and in order to rescue the girl, after consultation with some friends, he communicated the facts to the Public Prosecutor. However, that official refused to interfere at this time. Then the advertis.e.m.e.nt appeared once more, and this time the offender was arrested. The gentleman thereupon wrote to the Public Prosecutor, blaming him for not having taken action on the first occasion. The Public Prosecutor regarded this as libellous, and actually brought an action for libel against the philanthropic gentleman. Happily the Public Prosecutor lost his case; but none the less, in view of what happened, a good citizen may well hesitate in future to take similar action in the public interest, if, for some trifling excess of zeal, he is to render himself liable to an action for libel.

As I said above, of late years, in Berlin at any rate, such advertis.e.m.e.nts appear less often; or those that do appear belong chiefly to the second group. Doubtless we owe this to the action of the authorities, and more especially to a paragraph of the _Lex Heinze_,[126] of whose existence but few persons are aware, and of which, as my own note-books show, certain s.e.xual perverts have only become aware to their sorrow through a legal prosecution. I refer to the paragraph by which the issue of advertis.e.m.e.nts for an immoral purpose is declared to be a punishable offence. The newspapers have now become cautious about the insertion of advertis.e.m.e.nts whose immoral purpose is plainly perceptible. Moreover, the perverts themselves who used to issue such advertis.e.m.e.nts, having through the activity of the authorities learned the significance of the paragraph in question, no longer advertise in unmistakable terms.

CHAPTER IX

s.e.xUAL EDUCATION

In view of the dangers to which children are exposed from the side of the s.e.xual life, the question presses whether and how it is possible to prevent these dangers arising, or, if prevention has failed, to minimise them. To enable us to answer this question, the general question of s.e.xual education will have to be considered. In so far as s.e.xual manifestations in the child may arise from hereditary taint, the sociologist will endeavour to prevent them by hindering marriage or procreation on the part of those likely to give birth to such children (eugenics). Our present knowledge, however, does not enable us to say, when an individual exhibits some particular tendency to s.e.xual aberration, whether this same tendency will appear as a concrete symptom in the descendants. Apart, indeed, from certain cases of very severe taint, we are hardly in a position even to predict with any high degree of probability that the offspring will exhibit morbid endowments. There are marriages which we expect to result in the birth of congenitally defective children, and in spite of this the offspring are healthy; and conversely, we sometimes meet with affections which we are in the habit of regarding as dependent upon hereditary transmission, and yet we fail, in these cases, to find any evidence of such affections in the progenitors. And, apart from these theoretical considerations, the physician's advice is not of much importance, for experience teaches us that in questions of marriage his advice is very rarely followed.

The less power we have to operate by control of the congenital factors, the more necessary shall we feel it to be to minimise the dangers threatening the child by influencing its environment. It is true that in this department, as in others, there is much diversity of opinion regarding the limits of educability. Some contend that we can mould the child like wax, a view which prevailed especially during the "period of enlightenment" in the eighteenth century; others maintain that organic development is predetermined at the time of procreation, and that subsequent influences can have no effect. Although we must be careful not to overestimate the power of education, it would be no less erroneous to a.s.sume that development is inalterably predetermined at the time of procreation. This applies to the efficacy of educational influences in general, and to educational influences affecting the s.e.xual life in particular. The following consideration must be given due weight. The power of the educator is limited, not merely by the child's hereditary dispositions, but also by the nature of its environment.

Rudolf Lehmann, in his work on Education and the Educator (_Erziehung und Erzieher_), rightly points out that Rousseau, in his _emile_, when discussing the problems of education, neglects too much the influences of environment. If we wish our reasoning to furnish us with results of practical value, and not to remain confined to the purely theoretical plane, we must give due weight to this consideration. This applies with equal force to the matter of s.e.xual education. We know that the s.e.xual impulse may be excited by innumerable external stimuli. Such stimuli are continuously in operation, and the best educator has no power to exclude their influence. The mere a.s.sociation of the child with persons of the opposite s.e.x provides such stimuli. But a separation of the s.e.xes will not do away with them, as is proved, not only by the h.o.m.os.e.xual manifestations of the undifferentiated s.e.xual impulse, but also by those that arise transiently, at any rate, when the members of one s.e.x are completely segregated from those of the other--as in boarding-schools, on board ship, and in prisons. The educator cannot even count on being at all times able to safeguard the child from the sight of s.e.xual acts.

In the country, but also in the town, children have opportunities for this; not only when the members of a large family sleep in a single room, and the children can watch their parents and others in the act of s.e.xual intercourse; but in various other ways. The mere kissing of affianced lovers must in this sense be regarded as a s.e.xual act, and how is it possible so to bring up a child that it will never have an opportunity of seeing anything of the kind? If we go further, and recognise that through the a.s.sociation of ideas such a s.e.xual stimulus may arise from witnessing the coupling of animals--of dogs, for instance, in the street--we shall understand how the educator's powers are limited by the milieu in which he has to work. _We have, therefore, to recognise clearly from the first, that in the education of the child the complete exclusion of s.e.xual stimuli is impossible._

Obviously, when the external noxious influences exceed a certain measure, we may endeavour to effect an improvement by measures of general hygiene, through the activities of the central government, the munic.i.p.ality, or the community at large. In this connexion, we think of better housing conditions, of the separation of children from night-lodgers, and the like measures. But, even here, we must guard against making Utopian demands, after the manner of many fanatics on the subject of social hygiene, whose proposals are often quite incompatible with the maintenance of human intercourse. Independently of such impracticable demands for future reforms, the educationalist of to-day seeks to protect the child from unduly frequent s.e.xual excitement. But sometimes the result is other than he expects. Sport is recommended to divert the mind from s.e.xual ideas, and yet I have known cases in which marked s.e.xual excitement has been induced in this way. I am not now referring to mechanical stimulation through bicycling or horseback-riding, of which I shall speak later; but many a child has been s.e.xually excited through playing tennis with a girl-companion, and many a boy has been s.e.xually excited through rowing with another. Still, the fact that here and there a child may have been s.e.xually excited in such a way, is no reason for condemning what is invaluable to the enormous majority of children.

This is all that need be said regarding the manner in which general influences may counteract the efforts of the educationalist. But experience shows that the good effects of education are also seriously impaired by individual factors, especially by congenital predisposition, or by a tendency acquired very early in life. Although we no longer a.s.sume that human impulses, emotions, and sentiments take their course quite independently of the influence of other psychical powers, such as the reason and the will, still, unprejudiced observation shows that the power of the reason and the will is less than many persons imagine. In very many cases we are able to see how difficult it is, in a child of ten or less, to exert any notable influence upon the impulses, the emotions, and the sentiments. This is no less true in the positive than it is in the negative aspect. In one child it may be just as difficult to induce a fondness for music or reading, as it is in another to break it of an inclination for romping or other games. The same is true of the emotions--fear, for instance. In many cases, logically planned efforts may be altogether out of relationship to the result. Above all, great weight must be laid upon the consideration that there is a tendency to overrate the effect of education in the form of precept as compared with the effect of example. A child may receive the best of instruction without result, if in its own environment it is continually seeing something precisely the opposite of that which it is being told. _This applies with equal force to the s.e.xual life, which can be influenced far more readily by example than by good teaching, if the latter, though daily repeated, conflicts with what the child sees every day in the conduct of its relatives and companions._

Although, for this reason, we must avoid forming an exaggerated idea of the utility of individual s.e.xual education, this is not meant to imply that we should a.s.sume a perfectly pa.s.sive att.i.tude, and leave everything to the uncontrolled course of development, in order to allow the child, as the modern phrase goes, "to live its own life."

Before pa.s.sing to consider details, we must consider the elementary bases of all matters connected with the education of children--namely, morality and custom. These two words are connected by their inner significance, and not merely by etymological meaning;[127] but they represent different standards for pa.s.sing judgment upon our actions.

Certain things conflict with established custom, without its being permissible for us to speak of them as immoral. If at a social gathering for which evening dress is the rule, a gentleman turns up in light tweeds, he is guilty of a breach of custom, but not of an immoral action. If an officer in the army, having impregnated a young girl of the working cla.s.s, marries her, his action is a moral one in the positive sense, but in spite of this he commits an offence against the customs of his cla.s.s. Moreover, we have to remember that an act which is immoral or opposed to custom at a certain time and among a certain people, may at another time, or among another people, be neither the one nor the other. In such matters, opinions change; and this applies also to the case of actions connected with the s.e.xual life. Herodotus relates that in Babylon the virgins had, for a money payment, and in honour of the G.o.ddess of Love, to give themselves to a strange man; and similar customs are reported of other peoples of antiquity.[128] In providing for the s.e.xual education of the child, we have to take into account such changes of view; but we have also to consider the matter in relation to the present condition of our civilisation, for the child is to be a citizen of a real, not of an imaginary State.

Intimately related to custom and morality are certain psychical processes, especially the sentiment of shame. This is aroused by actions which are considered immoral by ourselves or by members of our environment, and by actions which conflict with established custom. The child detected in a lie is ashamed, either because the act is immoral, or more often because the act is by others regarded as immoral; for the opinion of others plays a great part in the causation of shame. The man who has forgotten to put on his necktie, and in that condition appears in public, is ashamed, because he has committed a breach of custom. This dependence of the sense of shame upon morality and custom is true above all in matters of s.e.x. A girl who is undressing in a hotel room, and has forgotten to bolt the door, so that a strange man suddenly enters by mistake, is ashamed; equally ashamed is a girl who encounters an exhibitionist with his p.e.n.i.s exposed. These examples suffice to show that the sentiment of shame, which is a.s.sociated with great discomfort, is a safeguard against immorality and against breaches of custom.

Similar relations exist for the sense of disgust, which is allied to the sense of shame. Shame is felt in the performance of an action disgusting to others, if against one's will one is watched in the process.

Defaecation is usually effected in some retired place: in the onlooker, defaecation arouses disgust; whilst by the person defaecating, if he knows that he is being observed, shame is felt. Normal s.e.xual intercourse between a man and a woman, objectively regarded, is a no less unaesthetic act than pseudo-coitus between two men. None the less, in most persons, the sight of the former act arouses less disgust than that of the latter. This difference depends upon the fact that by most persons h.o.m.os.e.xual intercourse is also felt to be immoral. In this relationship between the sense of disgust and immorality, it is often impossible to determine what is primary and what is secondary. A mutual retroaction occurs: the sense of disgust is increased, because the act is regarded as immoral; and, on the other hand, a strong sense of disgust may increase the perception of immorality. The same mutual relationships with the ideas of morality are found in connexion with the sense of shame. Beyond question, the sentiments of shame and of disgust are closely connected with the ideas of custom and morality; for shame and disgust arise especially in connexion with matters which conflict with our ideas of morality. It will, therefore, readily be understood that in moral education it is of the greatest importance what are the processes in connexion with which the instructor seeks to arouse the sentiments of shame and disgust; and, on the other hand, it is obvious that the ideas of morality induced by education, favour the development, in certain specific relationships, of the sentiments of shame and disgust.

It is a disputed question whether the sentiments of shame and disgust are inborn. In this controversy, two matters are confused, between which it is necessary to distinguish: the general disposition to experience such sentiments, and the special disposition to react with these sentiments to _specific_ occurrences. The fact is incontestable, that the general disposition to these sentiments is inborn. Inborn, also, is the a.s.sociation of specific bodily processes with the corresponding mental states: blushing, with the sentiment of shame; retching and vomiting, with the sentiment of disgust; these a.s.sociations are certainly not chance products of education. The only point in doubt is, to what extent the tendency is inborn to experience these sentiments as a result of certain specific stimuli. By some it is a.s.sumed, that when we experience disgust at the sight of certain animals--a worm, for instance--such concrete reactions depend upon inborn dispositions; whereupon the further problem emerges, how did our ancestors acquire the disposition they have transmitted to us, their descendants. Others believe that influences operating after birth have led to the a.s.sociation with the sight or idea of the worm of the tendency to feel disgust. Very early in life, the child has seen others exhibit disgust at a worm; doubtless he has often been told how disgusting this animal is; and thus gradually the sentiment of disgust has become a.s.sociated with the sight or the idea of the worm.[129] With the sentiment of shame, similar conditions obtain. If a human being feels shame in connexion with certain matters, and therefore avoids them, this may depend upon influences operating in the individual life (imitation, education, suggestion, &c.), by which the feeling of shame has been a.s.sociated with certain perceptions. On the other hand, it is possible that shame may be dependent upon a special inborn disposition. Certain processes in the animal world--for example, the fact that many animals deposit their excrement in hidden places, and the fact that b.i.t.c.hes and other female animals sometimes behave in a way which is interpreted as the exhibition of shame--may be regarded as the result of an inborn disposition. But others refer to the slight degree in which little girls appear to feel shame, as an indication that this sentiment is acquired during the individual life. Undoubtedly, we sometimes find manifestations of shame in very early childhood. Sikorsky[130] reports that his son exhibited typical shame at the early age of three and a half years. The boy was washing himself, having for this purpose taken off his coat and bared the upper part of the body. When his father unexpectedly entered the room, the boy was ashamed and startled, and said pleadingly, as he endeavoured to cover himself by crossing his hands over the breast, "Please don't come in, for I haven't got my shirt on." Sikorsky rightly points out that this position of the arms is typical of the sentiment of shame. Still, such cases are comparatively rare; and in contrast with them we may often note that older children, even girls of eight or a little more, will in play raise their petticoats so high that it is necessary to turn away if we wish to avoid seeing the genital organs, and often a word of reproof is needed from the mother or nurse to indicate to the child that it is doing something improper. The fact that in little children the sense of shame is so little developed, but that subsequently this sentiment becomes clearly manifest, has been used as an argument against the theory that it is inborn; but this argument cannot be accepted without reserve, for an inborn quality may not manifest itself until a certain definite age is reached--as we see clearly in the case of the s.e.xual impulse--and this apart from the consideration that the development of an inborn quality may be inhibited by influences acting during the individual life.

Whatever view we take of this problem, there can be no doubt as to the possibility of exerting a marked influence upon both qualities, the sentiment of disgust and the sentiment of shame, by means of influences operating during the lifetime of the individual. Thus, by education and habituation, it is possible to learn to repress disgust towards certain animals or certain excreta, as is done by the physician, and by nurses, male and female. The sentiment of disgust also depends largely upon general customs. The civilised European makes a mock of the fact that other races, certain oriental races, for instance, eat foods which to us are disgusting. A European invited as a guest at certain foreign banquets, is thoroughly disgusted when he sees food put into the mouth with the fingers instead of with knife and fork. And yet there is no great difference in respect of our own practice, when we put a piece of chocolate, a grape, or the like, into our own mouths. If, in Europe, we saw someone eating a pigeon in the same way as that in which we are accustomed to eat a crayfish, many persons would experience disgust. And yet, objectively considered, there is no reason to be less disgusted at the eating of crayfishes than when some other kind of animal is eaten in the same manner. Such modification of the sentiment of disgust by habit and custom applies also to s.e.xual matters. A girl who experiences disgust at the sight of s.e.m.e.n or the act of its e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.n, may, through habituation, cease to feel such disgust.

Similarly with the sentiment of shame, we find that in some persons it is aroused by matters to which others are more or less completely indifferent--and this is true no less of the s.e.xual sense of shame than of shame in general. We note the way in which habit or other influences may diminish or even entirely suppress the sentiment of s.e.xual shame, from the fact that prost.i.tutes willingly undress in the presence of a strange man without any sense of shame (although it must be admitted that some remnants of shame may remain even in many prost.i.tutes).

Finally, the experience of the marriage-bed shows how rapidly the sentiment of shame in respect of certain situations may disappear or largely diminish. Although a refined woman may long, and in some cases permanently, manifest a certain reserve towards her husband, still, there is an enormous degree of difference between the intensity of the sentiment of shame which a young bride experiences when undressing on her bridal night and that which she experiences in the like situation after a year of married life.

Other circ.u.mstances show that these sentiments are influenced, not merely by individual habituation, but also by the nature of general customs. A lady of the n.o.bility, president, perhaps, of a Ladies'

Society for the Promotion of Public Morals, may regard the short skirts of a music-hall dancer as the acme of impropriety, and yet will not hesitate for a moment to go into society in the evening in a low dress, with her b.r.e.a.s.t.s plainly visible to anyone standing by her when she is seated. The same lady would probably be furious at the suggestion that she should show herself to men in the dress of a ballet-dancer, but with a high corsage. And yet, experience shows that in other circ.u.mstances the short skirt is quite acceptable, inasmuch as when bicycling first obtained a vogue among the upper cla.s.ses, ladies of high standing were to be seen in the streets with short skirts and visible calves. In Germany, and in many other countries, it was for long regarded as improper for men and women to bathe in common. The Americans, however, saw no impropriety in mixed bathing, and of late years even the Germans find it possible for the s.e.xes to mix in bathing without any offence to the sense of shame. Here we have nothing more than the revival of an old custom, for in former centuries mixed bathing was practised in Germany.[131]

From the examples just given, we see clearly the way in which the objects and situations with which are a.s.sociated manifestations of shame and disgust, depend upon habituation and general custom. But just because this is so, both these sentiments are in the highest degree adapted to furnish protection against actions which are opposed to dominant custom, or are condemned by the prevailing moral code. By the sense of shame, the young girl is prevented from surrendering her person to any man who desires her. Shame interferes with the very preparations for the s.e.xual act; for example, with the act of undressing in the presence of a man. The sentiment of disgust may also exert a protective influence, for disgust is aroused in women by the s.e.m.e.n and its e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.n, and by many other things connected with the s.e.xual act.

All these considerations combine to show how important it is that proper care should be taken to promote in the child the proper development of the sentiments of shame and disgust, and also of the moral ideas. It need hardly be said, that the sentiments of shame and disgust are not the only psychical aids in the s.e.xual education of children. There are others, such as the fear of disagreeable consequences, which deters human beings from many immoral actions, and often enough at the outset greatly furthers the development of moral ideas; also there is direct instruction, the influence of which will be considered later.

But in the moral education of children, and also in the disquisitions of adults upon morality, mistakes are made. In particular, no distinction is made whether anything is to be regarded as immoral _per se_, or whether it is only considered immoral in certain circ.u.mstances. This is shown very clearly in the formation of opinions, from the standpoint of s.e.xual morality, regarding nakedness and the s.e.xual life. Because, in particular situations, nakedness is immoral, the child is often taught to regard nakedness as being _per se_ disgraceful. Similarly with the s.e.xual life. Instead of aiming at its proper control, the idea instilled is that the mere mention of s.e.xuality, and even its very existence, are things gravely immoral. The very same persons who teach the child to repeat the commandment, Honour thy father and thy mother, educate it also in such a way that it is forced to regard the act to which it owes its own existence as something which must have rendered its parents unclean. It has to be admitted that at times it is by no means easy, in these matters, to find the right way; its discovery demands, not interest merely, but also intelligence; it is, perhaps, an art. But often the right course is not so very difficult to find; and if we only exercise reasonable care in the repression of hypocrisy and of perverse moral ideas, we shall be able to educate the child in such a way that he will come to understand that exposure of his person is not a matter of pure indifference, and yet will not regard nakedness as something unclean. The little girl who draws her petticoats too high, will stop doing so when her mother forbids it. A child will not always ask the reason for such a prohibition; and if it does ask, all the mother need answer in this case, as in so many others in which the child is not yet competent to understand the reason, is that it will understand well enough when it is older. When the child is older, and when its understanding has enlarged, the mother need make no difficulty about explaining the true reason in a suitable manner.

In respect also of the sentiment of disgust, exaggerations must carefully be avoided. From a feeling of shame, and for fear of arousing disgust in others, many young girls refrain, when in the company of other persons, from retiring to satisfy the calls of nature. The physician knows that this may result not merely in discomfort, but in consequences by no means indifferent to health. In this respect also, a just mean must be the aim of education. The child has to be taught that, alike for aesthetic and for hygienic reasons, the evacuation of the excreta must be effected in a retired place. But it is necessary to avoid going to the extreme of producing in the child the impression that there is something disgusting in the faintest intimation of such a physical need, or of making it feel that there is something essentially shameful in the fulfilment of these natural functions. The same considerations apply also to the sentiment of disgust in relation to the s.e.xual life. In this also overstatement must be avoided. The education of young girls aims to a large extent at inducing them to regard the s.e.xual act, not merely as something of which they should be ashamed, but as something in itself disgusting. It is well known that quite a number of women are altogether unable to give themselves up to the s.e.xual act in such a way as to derive from it real enjoyment and satisfaction. A part of the severe disillusionment following marriage, depends upon the lack of normal s.e.xual sensibility in the wife; and it is by no means improbable that this state depends in some cases upon the education received in girlhood. If it is impressed on anyone from childhood upwards that a particular act is disgusting and shameful, ultimately inhibitions may arise, owing to which the natural impulse to the performance of that act, and its natural course and natural enjoyment, may be prevented. And although the widely prevalent lack of s.e.xual sensibility in women has additional causes, nevertheless I regard it as probable that in some of the cases, at any rate, this insensibility directly results from educational influences. In this matter, too, we must guard against exaggeration. We must educate children, boys as well as girls, in the belief that to mishandle the genital organs is forbidden alike by divine and by human law. But we must not teach them to regard the s.e.xual act as in itself disgusting; more especially in view of the fact that such an idea conflicts with the lofty ethical significance of the act to which we all owe our existence.

What has been said about nakedness, has bearings also upon the relationships of the education of children to the matter of the nude in art. No intelligent person will deny the importance to art of the representation of the nude. A clothed Venus is a thing with which the connoisseur would prefer to dispense. Although I am not myself an enthusiastic adherent of the movement started a few years back with a great flourish of trumpets for the introduction of art into the education of children--a movement which has already perceptibly slackened--I do not wish to deny the important bearings of art upon the education of the child. Children who are still comparatively young, have not as a rule much understanding of art. None the less, we must not withhold from the child possibilities of appreciating the beauties of the nude. Apart from this purely educational aim, we have to remember that it is impossible to preserve children completely from the sight of the nude in art. We might, of course, exclude them from our museums; but our own houses also often contain nude statuary, and books with ill.u.s.trations of the nude figure; and nude statues are to be seen also in places of public resort. A demand for the removal of such nude figures is so stupid, that it hardly deserves serious discussion--outside of the columns of the comic papers. A cla.s.sical education, too, gives so many opportunities for the sight or the mention of the nude--for instance, delineations of the G.o.ds of the ancient mythology that the demands of the "morality-fanatics" could be met only by cutting off the child from the most beautiful sources of culture. But now, let those who, in the lower cla.s.ses of our schools, have seen in the text-books of mythology pictures of unclad G.o.ds and G.o.ddesses, seriously ask themselves whether in this connexion they ever experienced even the faintest uncleanness of thought! If in one among thousands of such children, the sight of such a picture is followed by an undesired result, we have further to remember that this fact does not give us the right to deprive thousands of other children of the spiritual nourishment requisite for their emotional and aesthetic development, and for their general culture. There is no need for any anxiety about this question of the nude in art; and we must avoid suggesting to children that there is anything peculiar about the nakedness of statuary. We are, indeed, justified in asking whether the replacement or concealment of the genital organs by a fig-leaf--a practice supposed to have been initiated by the influence of the Jesuits about the middle of the eighteenth century--is a sound one; or whether this is not the very way to lead to objectionable conversations between children. The child compares the work of art with its own body and with the bodies of others which it has seen, notes the difference at once, and is thereby incited to improper conversation.

Those who wish to prevent children seeing artistic representations of the nude are influenced by two very different motives, although by the morality-fanatics themselves these motives are not clearly distinguished. Sometimes we are told that the sight of the nude in art may awaken the child's s.e.xual impulse, sometimes that morality forbids such representations of the nude. These two reasons must not be confused; for even if well-developed moral ideas may repress s.e.xual acts, it does not follow that everything which is immoral is also s.e.xually exciting. A great many pictures are immoral, and yet do not tend in the very least to induce s.e.xual excitement--it suffices to mention ill.u.s.trations of scatological scenes. Another source of error lies in the fact that things which appear s.e.xual to the adult, may to the child be entirely devoid of s.e.xual colouring. There is an amusing anecdote of a little girl who had been bathing with other children, and on her return home was asked whether boys had been bathing as well as girls; "I don't know," said the little one, "for they were all naked!"

This story is based upon a profound insight into the nature of the child, for children in general do not regard nakedness as s.e.xually important--though a few exceptions to this rule may be encountered. Just because the child is so often taught that nakedness is in itself immoral, we are apt also to teach it to experience s.e.xual excitement at the sight of a nude statue; whereas if the child had simply been taught that nakedness at unsuitable times and places was wrong, no such reaction would ensue. I remember the time in which the strong agitation took place which led to the pa.s.sing of the _Lex Heinze;_[132] and I was acquainted with a gentleman--he was a patient of mine--who was a member of the party by which the new law was so strongly demanded. When one day he came to see me, bringing with him his little boy, the latter noticed in my waiting-room a nude statue of a woman, but which the little boy took for a man. The child, who was obviously attempting to repeat something he had often heard said, asked his father navely: "Papa, if that were a woman, it would be improper, wouldn't it?" This remark is at once natural and characteristic; the child would never have felt the possibility that the statue was in any way improper, unless his education had led him to regard nakedness as disgraceful, or as immoral and improper. There is no doubt that our clothing is intimately connected with the development of the sentiment of shame and with the formation of our ideas of morality. But the more we learn so to form the mind of the child that it will not regard nakedness as being _per se_ immoral, the sooner shall we be able, not only to instil into children truly moral ideas, but also to safeguard them against the risks of premature s.e.xual excitement.

The considerations just stated apply _mutatis mutandis_ to the question of what children should be allowed to read. Although we should give to children neither obscene or erotic books, still, we should not withhold from them every poem which deals with love. If such were our rule, we should have to forbid the most beautiful works in our literature, and also our folk-tales. Read, for example, Grimm's tales, and you will find many pa.s.sages which our morality-fanatics would reject as improper; for instance, the story of the Sleeping Beauty in the Wood, and many others, telling of beauty, love, and kisses. The same remark applies to the folk-songs. There are persons, indeed, who would like to edit such songs and stories especially for the use of children. The case will be remembered in which the song, _In einem kuhlen Grunde_, was so modified for the use of children that they were told, not of the "beloved maiden"

who dwelt there, but of an "uncle" instead! Now, either the child that hears this song for the first time has as yet no understanding of the idea of love, and in that case there will be no danger in singing in its original form this song whose full beauty will not until later become manifest to the child; or else it has some understanding, and then the replacement of the girl by an uncle will certainly do nothing to safeguard the child's morality, but will merely corrupt its taste. The a.s.sumption that by hearing such a song, the awakening of s.e.xuality can possibly be antedated, is almost ridiculous; and little or no proof has been offered that anything of the sort ever occurs. One who in such a song sees the least suspicion of immorality, and who thinks that the hearing of it entails danger to a child, not only betrays the corruption of his own taste, but lays himself open to the countercharge that his own moral endowments are somewhat defective. Similar conditions apply to the theatre, and to the other factors in the mental development of children, and of human beings in general. It is quite impossible to isolate children from every intimation of the erotic or the s.e.xual. Let us remember the wide diffusion of the newspapers of our day. We cannot prevent children from reading newspapers; a statement that applies not to large towns merely, but to small towns and to the country districts as well. I speak here, not only of newspapers which are known to be sensational, but of others as well. The more serious periodicals are to-day often inclined to devote a good deal of s.p.a.ce to many s.e.xual occurrences; they even err in transforming many non-s.e.xual matters into s.e.xual ones, giving them a superfluous erotic background. They miss no chance of converting an ordinary murder into a l.u.s.t-murder; of describing a common a.s.sault as the outcome of sadism; and of writing of any woman of whom mention has to be made in connexion with some public occurrence, as a young lady of surpa.s.sing beauty. But apart from all this, the newspapers are to-day so full of s.e.xual matters (the question of s.e.xual enlightenment, the prevention of the venereal diseases, the suppression of prost.i.tution, the protection of motherhood, &c.), that with the best will in the world it is impossible to keep children from reading about such things. Nor can this be regarded as unfortunate, so long as these questions are treated in a moderate manner.

It is altogether different as regards erotic and obscene books and pictures. Unfortunately such products obtain a wide currency in schools, in part as printed p.o.r.nographica, and in part pa.s.sed from hand to hand in the written form. Thus, from a number of girls' schools come reports of the circulation of thoroughly obscene writings among girls from twelve to fourteen years of age. Especial favourites are descriptions of the wedding-night, mostly in ma.n.u.script form; also an obscene version of the story of Faust and Gretchen; and quite a number of other improper poems pa.s.s from hand to hand in girls' schools. In boys' schools, the circulating matter consists rather of obscene printed books and pictures. It is evident that the advertis.e.m.e.nts in many newspapers indicate the chief source of such articles. There is a trade in obscene pictures advertised under the harmless t.i.tle of "Parisian Landscapes."

For the most part these advertis.e.m.e.nts originate in Paris; to a lesser extent they come from Hungary, Austria, Italy, and Spain. The German traders in such commodities do not venture to advertise their wares in the German newspapers; nor is there any evidence in foreign newspapers of such advertis.e.m.e.nts proceeding from Germany. Through the meritorious activity of the _Volksbund zur Bekampfung des Schmutzes in Wort und Bild_ (The Popular League for the Suppression of Obscene Writings and Pictures), these advertis.e.m.e.nts have of late almost disappeared from our newspapers. But it can hardly be doubted that formerly immeasurable harm was done to children in this way. This is shown by the fact that half-grown boys often buy such things and circulate them among their school-fellows, all the more in view of the comparatively low price at which they can be obtained. The wide diffusion of the evil is proved by the frequency with which such things are confiscated in boys' schools, and with which obscene photographs are found even in girls'

schools.[133] For the suppression of such p.o.r.nographica in recent days we have certainly in great part to thank the League above named, whose efforts for good must not be confounded with the obscurantist aims of the pious and hypocritical individuals to whom every nude statue is an improper object.

The frequency with which such p.o.r.nographica are circulated in schools is subject to very great variations; but in the production of these differences, certain factors which are sometimes given great weight, really play a comparatively small part. Thus, it is commonly supposed that there is a great difference in this respect between large towns and small; but in the schools of small towns, p.o.r.nographic writings and pictures are at least as common as in those of large towns; and, indeed, the addresses to which p.o.r.nographic photographs are despatched from Paris are usually in the small towns. Thus the determining influence is not the difference between the large town and the small; and the character of the school depends, not only upon the moral level of its pupils, but above all upon the moral level and the _personal influence_ of the head of the school and the a.s.sistant teachers. I know certain schools, and some of these in large towns, in which hardly a single improper word is spoken by the pupils, and where no s.e.xual improprieties take place among the children, even though it has to be a.s.sumed that many of them indulge, at any rate from time to time, in solitary masturbation. But, on the whole, the spirit of such schools is an admirable one, in contrast to others, in which extremely loose manners prevail. Above all, therefore, we must avoid thinking that we state the truth of this matter by using the catch-word of "the corruption of the great towns."

It cannot be contested that the diffusion of these things among children involves serious dangers alike to their morals and to their health.

Speaking generally, upon adults p.o.r.nographic objects have rather a repellent than a s.e.xually exciting effect. In the case of children in whom no s.e.xual sensibility has as yet developed, they exercise no s.e.xual stimulation, but may later give rise to ill effects. But it is to ripening children and young persons, who do not yet understand the s.e.xual life, but to whom it is first displayed in this form, that such p.o.r.nographic objects are especially dangerous. Thus we find that many offenders against s.e.xual morality show children obscene pictures, in order to excite them s.e.xually, and render them compliant. Such s.e.xual excitement is _per se_ bad for the child's health; but the moral dangers are even more important. Children who have become familiar with such obscene objects may perhaps suffer in consequence from an inadequate development or even from a complete inhibition of the higher psychical elements of the s.e.xual life. The grave injury inflicted on children by these p.o.r.nographica cannot possibly be doubted. What has been said above should, however, suffice to show that the nude in art has no necessary connexion with this danger from p.o.r.nographic objects; although unfortunately, for business reasons, many persons hypocritically attempt to justify by false reference to the interests of art, drawings of the nude really intended to furnish erotic stimulus.

The much-discussed question of the common education of the s.e.xes (coeducation) is related to the mental hygiene of the s.e.xual life of the child. I shall deal with this question only in so far as it bears upon our subject; and shall not consider whether other reasons, such as the different endowments of the s.e.xes, are decisively opposed to coeducation. But coeducation has been opposed also for reasons of s.e.xual education, on two grounds: that it leads to a premature awakening of the s.e.xual life, and that it gives rise to immoral practices between the children.

It is true that when boys and girls a.s.sociate freely together the first s.e.xual feelings of boys are directed towards girls. But a separation of boys and girls at school would here be of little use. Not only would some other person of the female s.e.x be apt to take the place of a girl school-fellow, some person the boy often sees, it may be a grown woman, it may be a child (a school-friend of the boy's sister or of the family, a girl-cousin, or some girl employed about the house); but in many cases, if the s.e.xes are separated in youth, both in boys and in girls the s.e.xual impulse, when it awakens, may perhaps be directed towards a member of the same s.e.x. I may refer, in this connexion, to what was said on page 60 about the undifferentiated s.e.xual impulse.

A further problem is that of the s.e.xual practices which may result from the s.e.xual impulse. It is an indisputable fact that many boys, when the contrectation impulse is intermingled with the detumescence impulse, readily take to s.e.xual practices with others. Examples of this constantly occur in boarding-schools, and in all other kinds of educational inst.i.tutions; even in day-schools, where the children live apart from one another, we may observe that occasionally they begin s.e.xual practices very early in life (mutual masturbation, and intimate physical contact, especially contact involving the genital organs). We must always bear in mind the possibility that coeducation may lead to the more frequent occurrence of such practices between boys and girls.

But we must avoid over-estimating this danger. In the first place, there are many inst.i.tutions, higher schools and others, attended only by pupils of one s.e.x, in which mutual s.e.xual practices never take place, and in which neither boys nor girls, even though s.e.xual inclinations arise in them, ever effect s.e.xual intimacies with other children.

Although mutual masturbation is fairly common in schools, it cannot be regarded as the general rule. Further, it may be pointed out that when boys and girls are educated in common, the girls' natural instincts of self-defence will in many cases lead them to repel improper s.e.xual advances. This is proved by the actual experience of coeducation.

Finck[134] gives reports regarding coeducation in the schools of the western states of the American Union, and informs us that there every girl has her beau of fourteen to seventeen years of age. Notwithstanding the fact that these are boys of a fair age, undesirable consequences have not been observed. This view is substantiated by the reports made to me personally by American men and women, in whose truthfulness and judgment I have complete confidence. During a lengthy American tour, and on other occasions, I have elaborately questioned American physicians, ministers of religion, school-teachers, and fathers and mothers of families, regarding this matter. Their universal opinion was that no such undesirable results of coeducation were ever observed. Indeed, I received numerous a.s.surances regarding the customary s.e.xual abstinence of American young men who had been educated in common with American girls. In many of these circles, a young man known to indulge in s.e.xual intercourse, whether with a prost.i.tute or in a so-called "intimacy," was immediately ostracised; and this shows that as far as the question of s.e.xual chast.i.ty is concerned, the results of the coeducation of the s.e.xes are at least not more unfavourable than those of the separate education of the s.e.xes. I am well aware that many doubt the harmlessness of these conditions in America, and declare the account given of them hypocritical.[135] My own information, however, leads me to contest this for numerous cases. Of course we have to remember that the population of the United States of America is an extremely composite one, made up of numerous nationalities, whose customs differ as much as do those of the different social strata. The above remarks refer chiefly to the old Anglo-American circles. It is indisputable that even in these circles certain changes have recently taken place. The Americans refer this to their more extensive relations with Europe, in consequence of which European customs and opinions, by which s.e.xual abstinence is not demanded of young men, have been gradually introduced into those circles of American life in which formerly other views obtained.

But even if we believe that in isolated instances coeducation may lead to unfortunate results in the way of s.e.xual practice, we have to remember the objections which may be adduced from the standpoint of s.e.xual education against the separate education of the s.e.xes. Especially we have to think of the fact that by the separation of the s.e.xes during childhood we may favour the development of h.o.m.os.e.xuality. Apart from this consideration, I believe that in girls the capacity for self-protection arises much earlier in life when frequent a.s.sociation of boys and girls is permitted--a method of education which in Europe of late, at any rate outside the school, has become far more common than in former days, and one which is greatly favoured by the joint playing of games and other joint sports.

If the question be asked whether the s.e.xual life awakens earlier in children who mix freely with those of the opposite s.e.x, or in those whose companionship is confined to members of their own s.e.x, we find it difficult to detect any notable difference in this respect. As regards boys in boarding-schools, the information available certainly suffices to lead us to this conclusion; and from such information as I have received from girls' schools, and from the behaviour of schoolgirls (some of these quite young), I infer that no notable difference in the age at which s.e.xual sensibility first makes its appearance, results from the coeducation or the separate education of the s.e.xes.

One condition has to be imposed, if coeducation is not to entail any dangers. The child must not be allowed to regard such education as experimental, and as possibly dangerous. If the child were to be enlightened with all sorts of warnings, dangers might ensue. It is necessary that the child should regard coeducation as something perfectly natural. In this connexion, the matter a.s.sumes a different aspect, according as coeducation is undertaken from the outset, or only after the children are already half-grown. From the latter course, perils might sometimes arise, as Gertrud Baumer rightly insists.[136]

From the earliest days of childhood onwards, coeducation should appear to the child as a matter of course; only if this is not the case, may the practice prove dangerous from the s.e.xual standpoint, and especially from the standpoint of s.e.xual morality.

Here, of course, I make no attempt to offer a decisive opinion one way or the other upon the disputed question of coeducation of the s.e.xes. My sole aim has been to show that certain of the objections commonly made to coeducation, on the grounds with which we are especially concerned in this book, do not bear examination.

Better reasons can be found for objecting to some other modes of a.s.sociation on the part of children of the two s.e.xes. The most important of these are common dancing lessons and children's b.a.l.l.s. These are not so recent a development as is often a.s.sumed. More than a century ago, Pockels,[137] the distinguished psychologist and educationalist, objected strongly to dancing parties for children, which commonly lasted, he tells us, from five o'clock in the afternoon till midnight, and sometimes even on into the small hours of the morning. Beyond question, the a.s.sociation of children in dances can by no means be regarded as more innocuous than coeducation, all the more in view of the fact that the children at such dances are often fairly old--towards the end of the second period of childhood, or in the early years of the period of youth. For my own part, the danger of children's b.a.l.l.s appears to me to affect, not so much the sphere of s.e.xual morality, as that of hygiene and general morality. As regards the danger to health, I have known parents who were always complaining of the way in which their children were overworked at school, and yet saw nothing wrong in these same children going to dancing lessons on two evenings every week.

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The Sexual Life Of The Child Part 10 summary

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