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"You know I'd never ask you to risk that," I said. "You know as well as I do that you belong in front of the camera, that's what you live for. I could never expect you to put all that in jeopardy for me. But I really don't think that you admitting to our relationship is going to harm your career, at least not over here."Elise started to speak but I hushed her. "If you're willing to turn your back on LA because your agent wanted you to make a name for yourself by hooking up with nameless guys, then I think you're ready to come back to Portobello Road and be open about our relationship." My heart was thumping out of control behind my ribs, my breath coming short and shallow as Elise and I stared at each other.To my surprise, a slight smile tugged at the sides of Elise's mouth."I'm one step ahead of you," she said."What do you mean?""I contacted some magazines," Elise said slowly. "All the big ones.""And said what?""Invited myself to be interviewed," she said. "Told them I had a scoop about my private life.""About...me and you?" I leant back and looked at her quizzically."No, about me," Elise said simply. "Your name doesn't have to come in-""But I want it to!" I interrupted. "This is exactly what I want-openness about me and you."She reached out and took my hands in hers. "Life's about being with the person who makes you laugh, who makes you happy, who makes you feel special, and that's what I'm going to tell them." She dipped her head and looked up at me through her fringe. "It's about being with the person you can't stop thinking about, the person who gives you a squishy feeling inside when you know you're going to see them," she said. "The person you can't imagine living without. The person you truly want to be with." We held one another's gaze. "I truly want to be with you, Holly, and soon the whole country will know that, too."I leant into her. I knew one more look from her was all that it would take."Sometimes it just takes someone to be an a.r.s.ehole before they realise what they've lost," she said softly. "And I have been.""Have been what?""An a.r.s.ehole.""You got that bit right," I said, glancing at her, the hint of a smile on my lips."I've missed that, too." She rested her head on my shoulder."Missed what?""Your smile," Elise sighed.My smile deepened. "You'd do all that for me?" I asked.Elise shook her head. "I'd do it for us," she said simply. "Everything I've ever wanted in a person is sitting right here next to me. Everything."I rested my head on top of hers."You're funny and sweet and adorable and lovely and you're all I want," she said, her breath fluttering against my neck. "You're my Holly Eight-Year, do you know that?"I raised my head away from hers."You mean that?" I asked."Every word." She lifted her head off my shoulder and our eyes met, the look of complete love and longing on her face pulling me in to her, totally captivating me.I let her take my hand, the feel of hers so warm and soft, making me feel safe again.Slowly and tentatively she put her arm round my shoulder and pulled me to her. Her face was now millimetres from me, her warm breath on my skin, her lips almost touching mine."Please," she finally said, her voice low and quiet. "Just let me try again?"Her words disappeared as my lips met hers. I was lost in her; the weeks of despair just drifted away as I kissed her back. I shivered as she slowly kissed me, the sensation of her tongue against mine sending tingles up and down my spine, and melted at the touch of her soft lips, her body pressed against me, her hand reaching up under my T-shirt and stroking my side as she kissed me, over and over again.Finally, she pulled away and wrapped her arms tight against me again, as if she never wanted to let me go. I leant into her, Elise warm against me, her breath in my hair, all my feelings of love for her that I once thought I could ignore just flooding back again because they'd never gone away in the first place."I'm so sorry," she said, her voice m.u.f.fled in my hair. "You have no idea just how much I love you.""I do love you, too, Elise," I said, tracing a finger up and down her arm. "I've never stopped loving you."She cupped my face in her hands and kissed me again, softly and slowly. "I've been such an idiot," Elise said, kissing my face, my eyes, my hair, my forehead. "Such an idiot." She took my hands in hers and pressed them to her lips. "No one else matters, Holly," she said. "All that matters from now on is us, and soon everyone will know just what you mean to me, too."She stood up, holding her hand out for me. I let her pull me to my feet and lead me over to my window. Elise stood behind me, her arms linked around my waist, her chin resting on my shoulder as we gazed out at the early evening lights flickering into life across London."My whole life's been one big act, Holly," she said. "I'm tired of trying to be someone I'm not, so this time, I'm playing it for real." She softly kissed my neck. "Are you with me, my little Holly Eight-Year?""Always, Elise," I said. "Always."Epilogue.I settled back in the boat, the warmth of the wood, heated by the midafternoon sun, hot on my bare arms. Squinting up into the sunshine, I shielded my eyes with my hands as I watched the swallows quickly swoop and dive over the water's surface, which sparkled in the sunshine.Idly dangling a hand over the boat's edge, I dipped my fingers in and out of the cool water and thought about everything that had happened to me over the last few months.I was ridiculously, utterly, totally, absurdly happy."Perfect, isn't it?" I muttered sleepily.I turned my head and gazed lazily at Elise, lying next to me, head tilted towards the sun. She lifted her sungla.s.ses and glanced at me, a contented look spreading across her face."Perfect, just like you," she said."Smooth!"Elise propped herself up on her elbow and smiled down at me, tracing her fingers across my face."Read it to me again." I linked my fingers behind my head and closed my eyes. "Especially the bit in the middle. I liked that best.""We only just read it!" Elise laughed but still reached behind us, making the boat rock slightly, and picked up the magazine. "The same bit as before?""That's the best part, isn't it?" I opened one eye and looked at her."Not the photos?" She pulled her sungla.s.ses down the bridge of her nose and peered over the top of them at me, one eyebrow raised."Just read it!" I flapped a hand at her and settled down again, waiting for her to start.Elise lay down next to me again, holding the magazine above her head to shield herself from the sun. "Okay, wait." She ran her eyes over the page. "Here we are: It's true love! Actress Elise Manford tells us how her love for co-star Holly Croft grows deeper every day...""I could lie here and listen to you say that over and over, you know?" I turned my head and smiled."Following her exclusive interview with this magazine last month, in which popular Portobello Road actress Elise Manford revealed that she was dating co-star Holly Croft, Elise now talks about how being with Holly both in real life and on screen has changed their lives.""I love that photo of you." I pointed a lazy finger at the page. "Read some more?" I asked, adding, "Please?" when I saw Elise mock-roll her eyes behind her gla.s.ses."Let me see..." She studied the article. "Okay: Elise (19) told us: aHolly is everything to me, and I have to pinch myself every day at just how lucky I am to have her in my life...'""I love that bit," I said quietly.Elise read on. "aOur popularity has rocketed since we first went public about our love for one another, and we've both received so many messages of love and support from people telling us how happy they are for us. We're ecstatic at just how amazing our fans all are!' Isn't that the truth?" Elise puffed her cheeks out."And didn't I always tell you it would be okay?" I said, reaching out and stroking her leg."In the last month the public has taken the real-life couple to their hearts, culminating in Elise winning Best Actress at last week's Go Soaps! awards and, with Holly, also scooping the Best Couple award...Ha!" Elise put the magazine down and propped her herself up on her elbow, taking my hand and threading her fingers through mine. "What a night that was, hey?""The way things are going," I said, "there'll be lots more nights like that, too.""And we'll be together for each and every one of them," she said before leaning down and giving me a long, lazy kiss that seemed to go on forever."It really can be like this all the time, can't it?" I said dreamily when she finally pulled away, gazing back up at her."It can be like this forever and always," she said. "I told you before, now I've got you, I'm never letting you go ever again.""Hollise forever?" I asked, pulling her down to me again."Hollise forever," Elise grinned.About the Author.KE Payne was born in Bath, the English city, not the tub, and after leaving school she worked for the British government for fifteen years, which probably sounds a lot more exciting than it really was.Fed up with spending her days moving paperwork around her desk and making models of the Taj Mahal out of paperclips, she packed it all in to go to university in Bristol and graduated as a mature student in 2006 with a degree in linguistics and history.After graduating, she worked at a university in the Midlands for a while, again moving all that paperwork around, before finally leaving to embark on her dream career as a writer.She moved to the idyllic English countryside in 2007 where she now lives and works happily surrounded by dogs and guinea pigs.What Reviewers Say About KE Payne's Work.365 Days."One of the most real books I've ever read. It frequently made me giggle out loud to myself while muttering, aOMG, RIGHT?'"-After Ellen."Payne captures Clemmie's voice-an engaging blend of teenage angst and saucy self-a.s.surance-with full-throated style."-Richard Labonte, Book Marks.[email protected]"A fast-paced read [that] I found hard to put down."-C-Spot Reviews."A wonderful, thought-provoking novel of a teenager discovering who she truly is."-Fresh Fiction.Another 365 Days."Funny, engaging and accessible."-Kirkus Reviews.Soliloquy t.i.tles From Bold Strokes Books.The Road to Her by KE Payne. Sparks fly when actress Holly Croft, star of UK soap Portobello Road, meets her new on-screen love interest, the enigmatic and s.e.xy Elise Manford. (978-1-60282-887-2) Kings of Ruin by Sam Cameron. High school student Danny Kelly and loner Kevin Clark must team up to defeat a top-secret alien intelligence that likes to wreak havoc with fiery car, truck, and train accidents. (978-1-60282-864-3) Swans & Klons by Nora Olsen. In a future world where there are no males, sixteen-year-old Rubric and her girlfriend Salmon Jo must fight to survive when everything they believed in turns out to be a lie. (978-1-60282-874-2) The You Know Who Girls by Annameekee Hesik. As they begin freshman year, Abbey Brooks and her best friend, Kate, pinky swear they'll keep away from the lesbians in Gila High, but Abbey already suspects she's one of those you-know-who girls herself and slowly learns who her true friends really are. (978-1-60282-754-7) In Stone by Jeremy Jordan King. A young New Yorker is rescued from a hate crime by a mysterious someone who turns out to be more of a something. (978-1-60282-761-5) Wonderland by David-Matthew Barnes. After her mother's sudden death, Destiny Moore is sent to live with her two gay uncles on Avalon Cove, a mysterious island on which she uncovers a secret place called Wonderland, where love and magic prove to be real. (978-1-60282-788-2) Another 365 Days by KE Payne. Clemmie Atkins is back, and her life is more complicated than ever! Still madly in love with her girlfriend, Clemmie suddenly finds her life turned upside down with distractions, confessions, and the return of a familiar face... (978-1-60282-775-2) The Secret of Oth.e.l.lo by Sam Cameron. Florida teen detectives Steven and Denny risk their lives to search for a sunken NASA satellite-but under the waves, no one can hear you scream... (978-1-60282-742-4) Andy Squared by Jennifer Lavoie. Andrew never thought anyone could come between him and his twin sister, Andrea...until Ryder rode into town. (978-1-60282-743-1) Sara by Greg Herren. A mysterious and beautiful new student at Southern Heights High School stirs things up when students start dying. (978-1-60282-674-8) Boys of Summer, edited by Steve Berman. Stories of young love and adventure, when the sky's ceiling is a bright blue marvel, when another boy's laughter at the beach can distract from dull summer jobs. (978-1-60282-663-2) Street Dreams by Tama Wise. Tyson Rua has more than his fair share of problems growing up in New Zealand-he's gay, he's falling in love, and he's run afoul of the local hip-hop crew leader just as he's trying to make it as a graffiti artist. (978-1-60282-650-2) [email protected] by KE Payne. Is it possible to fall in love with someone you've never met? Imogen Summers thinks so because it's happened to her. (978-1-60282-592-5) Swimming to Chicago by David-Matthew Barnes. As the lives of the adults around them unravel, high school students Alex and Robby form an unbreakable bond, vowing to do anything to stay together-even if it means leaving everything behind. (978-1-60282-572-7) 365 Days by KE Payne. Life sucks when you're seventeen years old and confused about your s.e.xuality, and the girl of your dreams doesn't even know you exist. Then in walks s.e.xy new emo girl, Hannah Harrison. Clemmie Atkins has exactly 365 days to discover herself, and she's going to have a blast doing it! (978-1-60282-540-6) Cursebusters! by Julie Smith. Budding psychic Reeno is the most accomplished teenage burglar in California, but one tiny screw-up and poof!-she's sentenced to Bad Girl School. And that isn't even her worst problem. Her sister Haley's dying of an illness no one can diagnose, and now she can't even help. (978-1-60282-559-8) Who I Am by M.L. Rice. Devin Kelly's senior year is a disaster. She's in a new school in a new town, and the school bully is making her life miserable-but then she meets his sister Melanie and realizes her feelings for her are more than platonic. (978-1-60282-231-3) Sleeping Angel by Greg Herren. Eric Matthews survives a terrible car accident only to find out everyone in town thinks he's a murderer-and he has to clear his name even though he has no memories of what happened. (978-1-60282-214-6).Mesmerized by David-Matthew Barnes. Through her close friendship with Brodie and Lance, Serena Albright learns about the many forms of love and finds comfort for the grief and guilt she feels over the brutal death of her older brother, the victim of a hate crime. (978-1-60282-191-0).By the Author.365 Days.Another 365 Days.