The Puritaine Widdow Part 6

Aye, that, that.

PYE.

Give me Audience, then: when the old Knight thy Master has raged his fill for the loss of the chain, tell him thou hast a Kinsman in prison, of such exquisite Art, that the devil himself is French Lackey to him, and runs bare-headed by his horse-belly (when he has one) whom he will cause with most Irish Dexterity to fetch his chain, tho twere hid under a mine of sea-coal, and ne'er make Spade or Pickaxe his instruments: tell him but this, with farder instructions thou shalt receive from me, and thou shoust thy self a Kinsman indeed.

CORPORAL.

A dainty Bully.

SKIRMISH.

An honest Book-keeper.

CAPTAIN.

And my three times thrice honey Cousin.

NICHOLAS.

Nay, grace of G.o.d, I'll rob him on't suddenly, and hang it in the Rosemary bank; but I bear that mind, Cousin, I would not steal any thing, me thinks, for mine own Father.

SKIRMISH.

He bears a good mind in that, Captain!

PYE.

Why, well said; he begins to be an honest felow, faith.

CORPORAL.

In troth, he does.

NICHOLAS.

You see, Cousin, I am willing to do you any kindness, always saving my self harmless.

[Exit Nicholas.]

CAPTAIN.

Why, I thank thee; fare thee well, I shall requite it.

CORPORAL.

Twill be good for thee, Captain, that thou has such an egregious a.s.s to thy Cousin.

CAPTAIN.

Aye, is he not a fine fool, Corporal? But, George, thou talkst of Art and Conjuring; How shall that be?

PYE.

Puh, be't not in your care: Leave that to me and my directions.

Well, Captain, doubt not thy delivery now, E'en with the vantage, man, to gain by prison, As my thoughts prompt me: hold on, brain and plot!

I aim at many cunning far events, All which I doubt not but to hit at length.

I'll to the Widdow with a quaint a.s.sault.

Captain, be merry.

CAPTAIN.

Who, I? Kerrie, merry, Buff-Jerkin.

PYE.

Oh, I am happy in more slights, and one will knit strong in another.--Corporal Oath.

CORPORAL.

Hoh, Bully?

PYE.

And thou, old Peter Skirmish; I have a necessary task for you Both.

SKIRMISH.

Lay't upon, George Pye-board.

CORPORAL.

What ere it be, we'll manage it.

PYE.

I would have you two maintain a quarrel before the Lady Widdow's door, and draw your swords i'th edge of the Evening; clash a little, clash, clash.

CORPORAL.

Fuh!

Let us alone to make our Blades ring noon, Tho it be after Supper.

PYE.

I know you can. And out of that false fire, I doubt not but to raise strange belief--And, Captain, to countenance my device the better, and grace my words to the Widdow, I have a good plain Satin suit, that I had of a young Reveller t'other night: for words pa.s.s not regarded now a days, unless they come from a good suit of clothes, which the Fates and my wits have bestowed upon me. Well, Captain Idle, if I did not highly love thee, I would ne'er be seen within twelve score of a prison, for I protest at this instant, I walk in great danger of small debts; I owe money to several Hostesses, and you know such Jills will quickly be upon a man's Jack.

CAPTAIN.

True, George.

PYE.

Fare thee well, Captain. Come, Corporal and Ancient! thou Shalt hear more news next time we greet thee.

CORPORAL.

More news! Aye, by yon Bear at Bridge-Foot in heaven shalt thou.

[Exeunt Pye-board, Skirmish, and Oath.]

CAPTAIN.

Enough: my friends, farewell.

This prison shows as if Ghosts did part in h.e.l.l.

ACT II.

SCENE I. A room in the widow's house.

[Enter Moll youngest Daughter to the Widdow: alone.]

MOLL.

Not Marry? forswear Marriage? why, all women know 'tis as honorable a thing as to lie with a man; and I to spite my Sisters vow the more, have entertained a suitor already, a fine gallant Knight of the last Feather: he says he will Coach me too, and well appoint me, allow me money to Dice with-all, and many such pleasing protestations he sticks upon my lips; indeed, his short-winded Father ith' Country is wondrous wealthy, a most abominable Farmer, and therefore he may doote in time: troth, I'll venture upon him. Women are not without ways enow to help them-selves: if he prove wise and good as his word, why, I shall love him, and use him kindly: and if he prove an a.s.s, why, in a quarter of an hour's warning I can transform him into an Ox;--there comes in my Relief again.