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The next day she had many things to do and succeeded in botching most of them. I have no mind for anything, she decided. What is the matter with me? But, at least, when at last she opened the door for him, there was nothing amiss with her appearance.
In the room where the piano was, she sat down on the bench and smiled up at him. "Shall I sing now?"
Lennox put his hat on the sofa. "If you don't mind my talking to you."
"Very good, we will have a duo."
Over the keys her fingers moved, sketching a melody, pa.s.sing from it into another.
Beside the bench Lennox had drawn the only chair. He looked about, then at her.
"I remember so well the first time I came here."
Her lips tightened, but, suppressing the smile, she turned to him and said and so patiently:
"Is it a song without words you want, or words without song?"
Lennox leaned toward her. It was then or, it might be, never.
"It is you I want."
Ca.s.sy turned from him. Her fingers, prompted by a note, had gone from it into Gounod.
"Will you marry me?"
"Certainly not."
It was as though he had asked her to go skating. To mark the absurdity of it her voice mounted.
"_Le printemps cha.s.se les hivers----_"
The words are imbecile but the air, which is charming, seemed to occupy her wholly.
"_Et sourit dans les arbres verts_----"
"I know you don't care for me but couldn't you try?"
"Eh?" Ca.s.sy stayed her fingers, reached for a score on the top of the upright. "I thought you wanted me to sing."
"I want to know whether you can't ever care for me."
It sang about her like a flute. Something else was singing, not the bird in her throat, for she had hushed it, but a bird in her heart. It had been singing ever since he had entered the room. It had been singing with her the duo of which lightly she had spoken. But it was singing too loud.
Hastily she replaced the score, pulled at another, shoved it back.
"Won't you tell me?" Lennox was asking.
It will burst, she thought. Sidling from the bench, she went to the sofa, looked at it as though she had never seen it before, and sat down.
"Won't you?" he repeated.
She glanced over at him. Apparently now she was calm as you please.
"People marry out of optimism, or at any rate I did. I have had my lesson, thank you."
Lennox stood up. "You have suffered----"
"I read somewhere," she cut in, "that we have to suffer terribly before we learn not to suffer at all." Pausing, she added: "I suppose then we are dead."
She was getting away from it and he rounded on her.
"See here! We have both been in h.e.l.l, but that's over. Even otherwise, h.e.l.l would not be h.e.l.l to me if I were in it with you."
Thump! Thump! It was worse than ever. None the less she looked cool as a cuc.u.mber.
"The prospect is not very tempting. Besides, even if it were----" Again she paused, but this time without getting on with it.
He came toward her. "Even if it were what?"
"Temptation has its dangers. It may lead to captivity."
"And you fear that?"
"For you, yes."
"For me!" he exclaimed.
How it thumped! It thumped so that it hurt, yet spartanly she contrived to smile.
"You or any one. I was speaking generally. Then, too, you know, h.e.l.l may not be all your fancy pictures it."
He floundered in it. "What do you mean?"
"In no time you might get sick to death of me."
"Never!"
The denial exploded with such violence that the walls fell. Or at least so it seemed to Ca.s.sy. It seemed to her that the room had become a tent of fulgurant colours. They were blinding. She could not look at them.
How delicious it all was, though! In spite of which, she sighed.
"Well, there is no telling. Some day I may go and take a look there."
With mounting astonishment he repeated it. "Some day! But, if you ever will, why not now?"
Her eyes then were on him. "To find out."
"Find out what?"