The Old Tobacco Shop Part 13

"K-k-k-ker-_choo_!" said Marmaduke, giving a loud sneeze; and rubbed his beak with his foot and fluttered his feathers. "L-l-l-lock me up in the a-a-after hold, till I g-g-g-get all over this d-d-d-dreadful cold!

Th-th-three ch-cheers for hay f-f-f-fever! K-k-k-ker-_choo_!"

"I'll lock you up in the after hold, if you don't quit being so fresh and bold; I'll learn you manners before I'm through, and if ever I hear one little--"

"Ker-_choo_!" said Marmaduke, finishing Mr. Mizzen's sentence for him very neatly.

Everyone laughed, except the Able Seaman.

"All right," said he, "just wait till I've had my chow, I'll attend to you proper; now off with you--now!" And he tossed Master Marmaduke off his wrist up into the air. The parrot lit on a spar overhead, just under a sail, and peered down at the company without the least appearance of embarra.s.sment.

"If there's b-b-b-bacon and eggs," he cried, "I'll take l-l-l-liver!

Th-th-three ch-ch-cheers for l-l-l-liver!"

[Ill.u.s.tration: "L-l-lem!" shrieked the parrot. "Who's your f-f-f-friends?"]

Freddie burst into a merry laugh, and all his friends joined; all except Mr. Punch, who looked puzzled.

"'Ow could 'e 'ave liver," said he, "hif there was only bycon an'

heggs?"

At this everyone laughed louder than before, and Mr. Punch was completely perplexed.

"I'll explain that to you some day," said Toby. "Didn't you never hear a joke?"

"Ho, yes," said Mr. Punch. "Hi 'eard a wery good joke once; a wery good one indeed. Hi'll relate it to you. When I was a lad--"

"There's the breakfast bell," said Mr. Mizzen. "Sorry to interrupt, but we mustn't let it get cold. We'll hold the election afterwards."

No one waited to hear Mr. Punch's joke. The Able Seaman led the way, and all the others followed him down the deck, towards a kind of three-sided box which opened on a stairway below.

In a moment or two they found themselves in the dining-saloon, and in another moment they were seated about a round table, set for breakfast.

The pa.s.sengers insisted on the Able Seaman's sitting down with them, and he consented to do so.

A lad of about eighteen entered, to wait on the table. He had a shock of bright red hair, and a kind of frightened look in his eyes, as if he were afraid he would do everything wrong, and would always be in hot water about it. He stood behind the Able Seaman's chair, and began to make a queer contortion of the face, in an effort to speak.

"Th-th-th-there's--" he began.

"Skipper first," interrupted Mr. Mizzen, nodding towards Freddie.

The Cabin-boy (for that was what he was) went to Freddie's chair, and began to speak again, with the same contortion of the face.

"Th-th-th-there's ch-ch-chops, s-s-s-steak, b-b-b-bacon and eggs," he said.

"Yes, sir," said Freddie.

The Cabin-boy stared in bewilderment, and began again.

"Th-th-th-there's ch-ch-chops, s-s-s-steak, b-b-b-bacon and eggs," said he.

"Yes, sir," said Freddie, much embarra.s.sed.

"I don't blame you, skipper," said the Able Seaman. "I would too, if I hadn't eaten for two days. Next!"

The Cabin-boy stood behind Aunt Amanda's chair, and began:

"Th-th-th-there's ch-ch-chops, s-s-s-steak, b-b-b-bacon and--Ker-_choo_!" He gave a hearty sneeze, and pulled out his pocket-handkerchief; so he had to begin all over again:

"Th-th-th-there's ch-ch-chops, s-s-s-s-s--"

"Chops, thank you," said Aunt Amanda.

The Cabin-boy took his stand behind Toby's chair, and began:

"There's--there's--th-th-th-th--Ker-_choo_! Th-th-there's ch-ch-ch-chops, s-s-s-s-s--"

"Chops and steak," said Toby.

The Cabin-boy stood behind each of the other chairs in turn, and repeated each time his entire list. Everybody gave a different order, and the boy became so bewildered at last that he wiped his forehead with his pocket-handkerchief, brushed a tear from his eye, and when he had taken the last order dashed out of the door with a kind of sob.

As soon as he was gone, sounds came through the door by which he had left, as if a dreadful row was going on in the next room.

"Frightful temper, that cook," said the Able Seaman, "but the boy certainly does get on his nerves."

In a short time the Cabin-boy came in with four plates at once, and as he reached Freddie's chair the ship gave a deep lurch downward, and the four plates shot out of his arms across the room, showering the floor with chops, steak, bacon and eggs.

The boy gave a wild cry and burst into tears, and fled through the door.

From the next room came the sound of a row more violent than before.

"Never mind," said Mr. Mizzen, "he'll be back."

He came back presently, his eyes very red, and stumbling in and out managed to put down before each one a plate. Every plate contained chops, steak, bacon and eggs.

"Now," said Mr. Mizzen, when the breakfast was over, "we'll go up and hold the election."

When they came on deck, they were astonished to see a considerable number of men in blue overalls, who were sitting on the deck in a group.

As the pa.s.sengers approached, they stood up respectfully, and one of them said something privately to Mr. Mizzen.

"They've held the election already," said the Able Seaman, turning to the pa.s.sengers. "There's three dozen of 'em, and they've elected the captains and mates for the voyage; thirteen captains and twenty-three mates. They went right ahead without waiting for me, so I'm the only Able Seaman left on the ship."

"What!" said Aunt Amanda. "Do you mean to tell me--?"

"It's all right, madam," said Mr. Mizzen in an undertone. "You see, they're all free and equal, and everything goes by voting. They won't have it any other way. It's lucky they didn't all want to be captains.

It's all right, anyway, because there's none of 'em knows anything about navigation, and I'm the only one on board that _does_ know; so it comes to the same thing as if they had elected _me_ captain. But of course _they_ don't think of that. Not a word. I'll send 'em about their business now, as soon as they've put on their uniforms."

"Well!" said Aunt Amanda, gasping. "I never in my life--!"

The thirteen captains and the twenty-three mates disappeared from the deck in a hurry, and in a very few minutes reappeared. Each one of them wore, in place of his blue overalls, a smart blue suit with bra.s.s b.u.t.tons and gold braid, and a jaunty blue cap with gold braid around it; the mates having only nine instead of ten rows of braid around their sleeves.

The Able Seaman led them aside, and after a few words with them returned to his pa.s.sengers.