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"He wrote to me about it."
"Did he tell you how he saw me?"
"Yes."
"What more?"
"He said he thought there was little chance I would have any use for his letters; he saw the world was closing its nets around you fast; how far they were already successful he could not know; but he was glad he had seen what forbade him in time to indulge vain antic.i.p.ations."
"Oh aunt Caxton!" said Eleanor--"Oh aunt Caxton! what a strange world this is, for the way people's lives cross each other, and the work that is done without people's knowing it! If you knew--what that meeting cost me!--"
"My dear child! I can well believe it."
"And it aroused Mr. Carlisle's suspicions instantly, I knew. If I made any mistake--if I erred at all, in my behaviour with regard to him, it was then and in consequence of that. If I had faltered a bit then--looked grave or hung back from what was going on, I should have exposed myself to most cruel interpretation. I could not risk it. I threw myself right into whatever presented itself--went into the whirl--welcomed everybody and everything--only, I hoped, with so general and impartial a welcome as should prove I preferred none exclusively."
Eleanor stopped and the tears came into her eyes.
"My child! if I had known what danger you were in, I should have spent even more time than I did in praying for you."
"I suppose I was in danger," said Eleanor thoughtfully. "It was a difficult winter. Then do you think--Mr. Rhys gave me up?"
"No," said Mrs. Caxton smiling. "You remember he wrote to you after that, from Fiji; but I suppose he tried to make himself give you up, as far as hope went."
"For all that appears, I may be here long enough yet to have letters before I go. We have heard of no opportunity that is likely to present itself soon. Aunt Caxton, if my feeling is foolish, why is it natural?"
"Because you are a woman, my dear."
"And foolish?"
"Not at all; but feeling takes little counsel of reason in some cases.
I am afraid you will find that out again before you get to Mr.
Rhys--_after_ that, I do not think you will."
The conversation made Eleanor rather more anxious than she had been before to hear of a ship; but October and November pa.s.sed, and the prospect of her voyage was as misty as ever.
Again and again, all summer, both she and Mrs. Caxton had written begging that Mrs. Powle would make a visit to Pla.s.sy and bring or send Julia. In vain. Mrs. Powle would not come. Julia could not.
CHAPTER XIII.
IN MEETINGS.
"A wild dedication of yourselves To unpath'd waters, undream'd sh.o.r.es; most certain, To miseries enough."
In a neat plain drawing-room in a plain part of London, sat Mrs. Caxton and Eleanor. Eleanor however soon left her seat and took post at the window; and silence reigned in the room unbroken for some length time except by the soft rustle of Mrs. Caxton's work. Her fingers were rarely idle. Nor were Eleanor's hands often empty; but to-day she stood still as a statue before the window, while now and then a tear softly roll down and dropped on her folded hands. There were no signs of the tears however, when the girl turned round with the short announcement,
"She's here."
Mrs. Caxton looked up a little bit anxiously at her adopted child; but Eleanor's face was only still and pale. The next moment the door opened, and for all the world as in old times the fair face and fair curls of Mrs. Powle appeared. Just the same; unless just now she appeared a trifle frightened. The good lady felt so. Two fanatics. She hardly knew how to encounter them. And then, her own action, though she could not certainly have called it fanatical, had been peculiar, and might be judged divers ways. Moreover, Mrs. Powle was Eleanor's mother.
There was one in the company who remembered that, witness the still close embrace which Eleanor threw around her, and the still hiding of the girl's face on her mother's bosom. Mrs. Powle returned the embrace heartily enough; but when Eleanor's motionless clasp had lasted as long as she knew how to do anything with it and longer than she felt to be graceful, Mrs. Powle whispered,
"Won't you introduce me to your aunt, my dear,--if this is she."
Eleanor released her mother, but sobbed helplessly for a few minutes; then she raised her head and threw off her tears; and there was to one of the two ladies an exquisite grace in the way she performed the required office of making them known to each other. The gentleness of a chastened heart, the strength of a loving one, the dignity of an humble one, made her face and manner so lovely that Mrs. Caxton involuntarily wished Mr. Rhys could have seen it. "But he will have chance enough,"
she thought, somewhat incongruously, as she met and returned her sister-in-law's greetings. Mrs. Powle made them with ceremonious respect, not make believe, and with a certain eagerness which welcomed a diversion from Eleanor's somewhat troublesome agitation. Eleanor's agitation troubled no one any more, however; she sat down calm and quiet; and Mrs. Powle had leisure, glancing at her from time to time, to get into smooth sailing intercourse with Mrs. Caxton. She took off her bonnet, and talked about indifferent things, and sipped chocolate; for it was just luncheon time. Ever and anon her eyes came back to Eleanor; evidently as to something which troubled her and which puzzled her; and Mrs. Caxton saw, which had also the effect of irritation too.
Very likely, Mrs. Caxton thought! Conscience on one hand not satisfied, and ambition on the other hand disappointed, and Eleanor the point of meeting for both uneasy feelings to concentrate their forces. It would come out in words soon, Mrs. Caxton knew. But how lovely Eleanor seemed to her. There was not even a cloud upon her brow now; fair as it was pure and strong.
"And so you are going?" Mrs. Powle began at last, in a somewhat constrained voice. Eleanor smiled.
"And _when_ are you going?"
"My letter said, Next Tuesday the ship sails."
"And pray, Eleanor, you are not going alone?"
"No, mamma. A gentleman and his wife are going the whole voyage with me."
"Who are they?"
"A Mr. Amos and his wife."
"_What_ are they then? missionaries?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Going to that same place?"
"Yes, ma'am--very nicely for me."
"Pray how long do you expect the voyage will take you?"
"I am not certain--it is made, or can be made, in four or five months; but then we may have to stop awhile at Sydney."
"Sydney? what Sydney? Where is that?"
"Australia, mamma," said Eleanor smiling. "New South Wales. Don't you know?"
"_Australia!_ Are you going there? To Botany Bay?"
"No, mamma; not to Botany Bay. And I only take Australia by the way. I go further."
"_Further_ than Botany Bay?"
"Yes, ma'am."