The Mystic Masseur Part 16

'I ain't want Ramlogan picture in my house,' Ganesh said.

'I are not going to take it down.'

'All right, leave Ramlogan hanging up. But see what I going to put up.'

It was a photograph of a simpering Indian film-actress.

Leela wept a little.

Ganesh said blandly, 'It does make a change to have a happy face in the house.'

The one feature of the new house which thrilled them for a long time was the lavatory. It was so much better than the old cess-pit. And one Sat.u.r.day, in San Fernando, Ganesh came upon an ingenious toy which he decided to use in the lavatory. It was a musical toilet-paper rack. Whenever you pulled at the paper, it played Yankee Doodle Dandy Yankee Doodle Dandy.

This, and the sepia drawings, were to inspire two of Ganesh's most successful writings.

Narayan's attacks increased, and varied. One month Ganesh was accused of being anti-Hindu; another month of being racialist; later he was a dangerous atheist; and so on. Soon the revelations of The Little Bird threatened to swamp The Hindu The Hindu.

'And still he are calling it a little bird.'

'You right, girl. The little bird grow up and come a big black corbeau corbeau.'

'Dangerous man, pundit,' Beharry warned. When Beharry came now to see Ganesh he had to go to the fern-smothered verandah upstairs. Downstairs was one large room where clients waited. 'The time go come when people go start believing him. Is like a advertising campaign, you know.'

'If you ask me,' said Leela, in her fatigued, bored manner, 'the man is a disgrace to Hindus in this place.' She rested her head on her right shoulder and half-shut her eyes. 'I remember how my father did give a man a proper horse-whipping in Penal. It are just what Narayan want.'

Ganesh leaned back in his morris chair. 'The way I look at it is this.'

Beharry nibbled, all attention.

'What would Mahatma Gandhi do in a situation like this?'

'Don't know, pundit.'

'Write. That's what he would do. Write.'

So Ganesh took up pen again. He had considered his writing career almost over; and was only planning, in a vague way, a spiritual autobiography on the lines of the Hollywood Hindus. But this was going to be a big thing, to be attempted much later, when he was ready for it. Now he had to act immediately.

He wanted to do things properly. He went to Port of Spain his courage failed him at the last moment and he wore English clothes to the Registrar-General's Office in the Red House. There he registered Ganesh Publishing Company, Limited. The insignia of the firm was an open lotus.

Then he began to write again and found, to his delight, that the desire to write had not died, but was only submerged. He worked hard at his book, sitting up late at night after treating clients all day; and often Leela had to call him to bed.

Beharry rubbed his hands. 'Oh, this Narayan going to get it good.'

The book, when it came out two months later, was a surprise to Beharry. It looked like a real book. It had hard covers; the type was big and the paper thick; and the whole thing looked substantial and authoritative. But Beharry was dismayed at the subject. The book was called The Guide to Trinidad The Guide to Trinidad.

'Basdeo do a nice job this time,' Ganesh said.

Beharry agreed, but looked doubtful.

'It go knock h.e.l.l out of Narayan. It go do you a lot of good and it go do Leela a lot of good.'

Beharry dutifully read The Guide to Trinidad The Guide to Trinidad. He found it good. The history, geography, and population of Trinidad were described in a masterly way. The book spoke about the romance of Trinidad's many races. In a chapter called The East in the West The East in the West, readers were told that they would be shocked to find a mosque in Port of Spain; and even more shocked to find, in a village called Fuente Grove, a genuine Hindu temple which looked as if it had been bodily transported from India. The Fuente Grove Hindu temple was considered well worth a visit, for spiritual and artistic reasons.

The anonymous author of the Guide Guide was enthusiastic about the island's modernity. The island, he stressed, had three up-to-date daily newspapers, and foreign advertisers could consider them good investments. But he deplored the absence of any influential weekly or monthly paper, and he warned foreign advertisers to be wary of the mushroom monthlies which claimed to be organs of certain sections of the community. was enthusiastic about the island's modernity. The island, he stressed, had three up-to-date daily newspapers, and foreign advertisers could consider them good investments. But he deplored the absence of any influential weekly or monthly paper, and he warned foreign advertisers to be wary of the mushroom monthlies which claimed to be organs of certain sections of the community.

Ganesh sent free copies of the Guide Guide to all the American Army camps in Trinidad, 'to welcome', as he wrote, 'our brave brothers-in-arms'. He also sent copies to export agencies and advertising agencies in America and Canada which dealt with Trinidad. to all the American Army camps in Trinidad, 'to welcome', as he wrote, 'our brave brothers-in-arms'. He also sent copies to export agencies and advertising agencies in America and Canada which dealt with Trinidad.

Beharry did his best to hide his bewilderment.

Leela said, 'It are beat me, if I see why for you doing all this.'

He left her to her worries; ordered her to get tablecloths, lots of knives, forks, and spoons; and warned her to look after the restaurant properly. He told Beharry it would be wise for him to lay in large stocks of rum and lager.

Presently the American soldiers began to pour into Fuente Grove and the village children had their first chew of gum. The soldiers came in jeeps and army lorries, some in taxis with girl-friends. They saw elephants in stone and were rea.s.sured, if not satisfied, but when Ganesh took them on a tour of his temple he used the word 'tour' they felt they had their money's worth.

Leela counted more than five thousand Americans.

Beharry had never been so busy in all his life.

'Is like what I did think,' Ganesh said. 'Trinidad is a small place and it ain't have much for the poor Americans to do.'

Many of them asked for spiritual advice and all who asked received it.

'Sometimes,' Ganesh said, 'I does feel that these Americans is the most religious people in the world. Even more than Hindus.'

'Hollywood Hindus,' muttered Beharry, but he nibbled so badly Ganesh didn't catch what he was saying.

After three months The Hindu The Hindu announced that it had to cut the number of its pages because it wished to help the war effort. Not many people besides Ganesh noticed that there were fewer advertis.e.m.e.nts for patent medicines and other internationally known products. announced that it had to cut the number of its pages because it wished to help the war effort. Not many people besides Ganesh noticed that there were fewer advertis.e.m.e.nts for patent medicines and other internationally known products. The Hindu The Hindu lost the glamour of ill.u.s.trated advertis.e.m.e.nts; and Narayan was making money only from plain statements about small shops here and there in Trinidad. lost the glamour of ill.u.s.trated advertis.e.m.e.nts; and Narayan was making money only from plain statements about small shops here and there in Trinidad.

But The Little Bird still twittered.

9. Press Pundit

GANESH FOUND HIMSELF now a philosopher and arbiter. Indian villages in Trinidad still had now a philosopher and arbiter. Indian villages in Trinidad still had panchayats panchayats, councils of elders, and he was often invited by them to give judgement in a case of minor theft or a.s.sault, or to settle a quarrel between husband and wife. Often, too, he was asked to address prayer-meetings.

His arrival at such a meeting was impressive. He came out of his taxi with dignity, tossed his green scarf over his shoulder, and shook hands with the officiating pundit. Then two more taxis came up with his books. Helpers fell upon these taxis, grabbed armfuls of books, and took them to the platform. The helpers were proud and busy people then, and looked almost as solemn as Ganesh. They ran from taxi to platform and back again, frowning, never saying a word.

Seated on the platform under a ta.s.selled red canopy, and surrounded by his books, Ganesh looked the picture of authority and piety. His gaily-dressed audience rippled out from the platform in widening circles of diminishing splendour, from well-dressed businessmen and shopkeepers just below the platform to ragged labourers at the back, from extravagantly bedecked children sleeping on blankets and cushions to naked, spidery-limbed children sprawling on sugar-sacks.

People came to hear him not only because of his reputation but also because of the novelty of what he said. He spoke about the good life, about happiness and how to get it. He borrowed from Buddhism and other religions and didn't hesitate to say so. Whenever he wished to strengthen a point he snapped his fingers and a helper held a book open towards the audience so that they could see that Ganesh wasn't making it all up. He spoke in Hindi but the books he showed in this way were in English, and people were awed by this display of learning.

His main point was that desire was a source of misery and therefore desire ought to be suppressed. Occasionally he went off at a tangent to discuss whether the desire to suppress desire wasn't itself a desire; but usually he tried to be as practical as possible. He spoke with fervour about the Buddha's Fire Sermon. Sometimes from that he moved on naturally to the war, and war in general, and to the quotation from d.i.c.kens's Child's History of England Child's History of England that 'war is a dreadful thing'. At other times he said that happiness was only possible if you cleared your mind of desire and looked upon yourself as part of Life, just a tiny link in the vast chain of Creation. 'Lie down on the dry gra.s.s and feel Life growing out from the rocks and earth beneath you, through you, and upwards. Look at the clouds and sky when it isn't hot and feel that you are part of all that. Feel that everything else is an extension of you. Therefore you, who are all this, can never die.' that 'war is a dreadful thing'. At other times he said that happiness was only possible if you cleared your mind of desire and looked upon yourself as part of Life, just a tiny link in the vast chain of Creation. 'Lie down on the dry gra.s.s and feel Life growing out from the rocks and earth beneath you, through you, and upwards. Look at the clouds and sky when it isn't hot and feel that you are part of all that. Feel that everything else is an extension of you. Therefore you, who are all this, can never die.'

People sometimes understood and when they got up they felt a little n.o.bler.

And it was precisely for this that now, in 1944, The Little Bird began attacking Ganesh. It seemed to have reconciled itself to his 'so-called mysticism'.

The Little Bird said: 'I am just a little birdie but I think it is surely a retrograde step for any community these days to look up to a religious visionary...'

The Great Belcher told Ganesh, 'And, boy, Narayan start copying you. He start giving lectures now in the towns. And he showing his own books and thing too. Something about religion and the people.'

'Opium,' Beharry said.

Every new revelation of The Little Bird was carefully studied in Fuente Grove.

'It ain't your mystical powers he jealousing now, pundit. He working for the elections in two years' time. First election with universal adult franchise. Yes, universal adult franchise. Is what he have his eye on.'

Later issues of The Hindu The Hindu seemed to show that Beharry was right. Spare inches of the magazine were no longer filled up with quotations from the seemed to show that Beharry was right. Spare inches of the magazine were no longer filled up with quotations from the Gita Gita or the or the Upanishads Upanishads. Now it was all: Workers' Unite! Each One Teach One, Mens Sana in Corpore Sano, Per Ardua ad Astra Workers' Unite! Each One Teach One, Mens Sana in Corpore Sano, Per Ardua ad Astra, The Hindu is an Organ of Progress, I may not agree with what you say but I will fight to the death to defend your right to say it is an Organ of Progress, I may not agree with what you say but I will fight to the death to defend your right to say it. The Little Bird began to agitate for A Fair Day's Pay for a Fair Day's Work, and Homes for the Dest.i.tute; later it announced the opening of The Hindu The Hindu 'Homes for Dest.i.tutes' fund. 'Homes for Dest.i.tutes' fund.

One day Leela said to Suruj Mooma, 'I are thinking of taking up social welfare work.'

'My dear, is the said selfsame thing that Suruj p.o.o.pa begging begging me to do a long long time now. But, my dear, I ain't have the time.' me to do a long long time now. But, my dear, I ain't have the time.'

The Great Belcher was enthusiastic and practical. 'Leela, it have nine years I know you, and is the best idea you ever have. All this food I does come here and see you throwing away, you could give to poor people.'

'Ah, Aunt, it are not much that I does throw away. If something are not use today, well it are use tomorrow. But how I could start up with this social welfare work?'

'I go tell you how they does do it. You just get some children together, bring them inside the restaurant, and feed them up. Or you go outside, look for children, and feed them outside. Christmas-time come round now, you pick up two three balloons and you go round giving them away.'

'Yes, Soomintra beginning to stock a lot of prutty prutty balloons.'

And every Sunday now Leela, with the help of The Great Belcher, did social work.

Ganesh worked on, unperturbed by Narayan and The Little Bird. It was as if Narayan's taunts had encouraged him to do just the thing for which he was attacked. In this he was far-sighted; for certainly it was the books he wrote at this time which helped to establish his reputation, not only in the country, but also in Port of Spain. He used the material of his talks for The Road to Happiness. The Road to Happiness. After that came After that came Re-incarnation, The Soul as I See It, The Necessity for Faith. Re-incarnation, The Soul as I See It, The Necessity for Faith. These books sold regularly and well; but none of them had spectacular success. These books sold regularly and well; but none of them had spectacular success.

And then, one after the other, appeared the two books that made his name a household word in Trinidad.

The first book began: 'On Thursday, May 2, at nine o'clock in the morning, just after I had had breakfast, I saw G.o.d. He looked at me and said...'

What G.o.d Told Me must surely rank as a cla.s.sic in Trinidad literature. Its stark simplicity, almost ingenuousness, is shattering. The character of the narrator is beautifully revealed, especially in the chapters of dialogue, where his humility and spiritual bewilderment counter-point the unravelling of many knotty metaphysical points. There were also some chapters of spirited prophecy. The end of the war was predicted, and the fate of certain local people. must surely rank as a cla.s.sic in Trinidad literature. Its stark simplicity, almost ingenuousness, is shattering. The character of the narrator is beautifully revealed, especially in the chapters of dialogue, where his humility and spiritual bewilderment counter-point the unravelling of many knotty metaphysical points. There were also some chapters of spirited prophecy. The end of the war was predicted, and the fate of certain local people.

The book set a fashion. Many people in many parts of Trinidad began seeing G.o.d. The most celebrated was Man-man of Miguel Street in Port of Spain. Man-man saw G.o.d, tried to crucify himself, and had to be put away.

And only two months after the publication of What G.o.d Told Me What G.o.d Told Me Ganesh scored a stupendous success of scandal. His inspiration was the musical toilet-roll rack. Because Ganesh scored a stupendous success of scandal. His inspiration was the musical toilet-roll rack. Because Profitable Evacuation Profitable Evacuation was published during the war its t.i.tle was misunderstood; fortunately, for it might not have been allowed if the authorities knew that it was concerned more or less with constipation. 'A vital subject,' Ganesh wrote in his Preface, 'one that has adversely dogged human relationships since the beginning of time.' The gist of the book was that evacuation could be made not only pleasurable but profitable, a means of strengthening the abdominal muscles. The system he recommended is roughly that which contortionists and weight-lifters call excavation. was published during the war its t.i.tle was misunderstood; fortunately, for it might not have been allowed if the authorities knew that it was concerned more or less with constipation. 'A vital subject,' Ganesh wrote in his Preface, 'one that has adversely dogged human relationships since the beginning of time.' The gist of the book was that evacuation could be made not only pleasurable but profitable, a means of strengthening the abdominal muscles. The system he recommended is roughly that which contortionists and weight-lifters call excavation.

This, printed on thick paper, with a cover of brightest yellow decorated with a lotus, established Ganesh finally, without question.

Left to himself Ganesh might not have taken any further action against Narayan. The Little Bird was only a twitter of protest amid whole-hearted and discerning applause. But people like The Great Belcher and Beharry didn't like it.

Beharry, in particular, was upset. Ganesh had opened up to him vaster vistas of reading and knowledge; and it was because of Ganesh that he prospered. He had put up his new shop, all concrete and plaster and gla.s.s. Land-values in Fuente Grove had risen and he had profited by that too. From time to time he was asked by various Literary-Debating-and-Social-Welfare Societies to talk on aspects of Ganesh's career: Ganesh the man, Ganesh the mystic, the contribution of Ganesh to Hindu thought. His fate was bound up with Ganesh's and he, more than anyone, resented Narayan's attacks.

He did what he could to encourage Ganesh to act.

'The man attack you again this month, pundit.'

'Gaddaha!'

'But it does look bad bad, pundit. Especially now that Ramlogan beginning to write against you in The Hindu. The Hindu. Is dangerous.' Is dangerous.'

But Ganesh wasn't worried that Narayan was preparing for the 1946 elections. 'I ain't burning to be one of those d.a.m.n crooks who does go up for elections.'

'You hear the latest, pundit? Narayan form a party. The Hindu a.s.sociation. Is a election stunt, pundit. He ain't have a chance to win in Port of Spain. He have to come to the country and that is where he frighten you beat him.'

'Beharry, you and me know what sort of thing Indian a.s.sociations is in this place. Narayan and those people just like little girls playing dolly-house.'

Ganesh's judgement was sound. At the first general meeting of the Hindu a.s.sociation Narayan was elected President. The following were also elected: four a.s.sistant-Presidents, two Vice-Presidents, four a.s.sistant Vice-Presidents; many Treasurers; one Secretary-in-Chief, six Secretaries, twelve a.s.sistant-Secretaries.

'You see? They ain't leave n.o.body out. Look, Beharry, boy, going about talking to all these prayer-meetings, I get to know Trinidad Indians like the back of my own hand.'

But then Narayan began playing the fool. He began sending off cables to India, to Mahatma Gandhi, Pandit Nehru and the All-India Congress; in addition to anniversary cables of all sorts: he noted centenaries, bicentenaries tercentenaries. And every time he sent a cable the news was reported in the Trinidad Sentinel. Trinidad Sentinel. There was nothing to prevent Ganesh sending his own cables; but in India, where they didn't know what was what in Trinidad, what chance would a cable signed There was nothing to prevent Ganesh sending his own cables; but in India, where they didn't know what was what in Trinidad, what chance would a cable signed GANESH PUNDIT MYSTIC GANESH PUNDIT MYSTIC have against one signed have against one signed NARAYAN NARAYAN PRESIDENT PRESIDENT HINDU HINDU a.s.sOCIATION a.s.sOCIATION TRINIDAD TRINIDAD?

The deputation was the work of Beharry.

Two men and a boy came out one Sunday afternoon to Ganesh's residence. One man was tall, black, and fat. He looked a little like Ramlogan; only, he was dressed in spotless white: his belly was so big it hung over his black leather belt and hid it. In his shirt pocket he carried a letter and a whole row of pens and pencils. The other man was thin, fair, and good-looking. The boy wore short trousers and his shirt-sleeves were b.u.t.toned at his wrists. Ganesh had often met the men and knew them as organizers. The boy he didn't know.

The deputation sat down carefully on the morris chairs in the verandah and Ganesh shouted for Leela to bring put some CocaCola.

The deputation looked through the drawing-room doors and examined the pictures and the two big Coca-Cola calendars on the walls.

Then they saw Leela, thin and elegant in her sari, opening the refrigerator. The fat man nudged the boy sitting next to him on the couch; and the whole deputation stopped staring.

The fat man became businesslike. 'Sahib, we ain't come here to beat about the bush. Beharry and your aunt a nice nice nice woman, sahib they ask me to come because of the amount of experience I have organizing prayer-meetings and things like that ' woman, sahib they ask me to come because of the amount of experience I have organizing prayer-meetings and things like that '

The Coca-Cola came. Four frosted bottles on a gla.s.s-bottomed tray. Leela sighed. 'Wait jirst one moment. I are going to get the gla.s.ses.'

The fat man looked at the bottles. The thin fair man fingered the strip of adhesive-plaster above his left eye. The boy looked at the ta.s.sels on Ganesh's scarf. Ganesh smiled at them all in turn and they all smiled back, except the boy.

On another gla.s.s-bottomed tray Leela brought expensive-looking gla.s.ses of great beauty, arabesqued in gold, red, and green and ringed with gold bands.

The deputation held their gla.s.ses in both hands.

There was an awkward silence until Ganesh asked the fat man, 'What you doing these days, Swami?'

Swami took a sip of Coca-Cola, a refined lilliputian sip. 'Jirst living, sahib.'

'Jirst living, eh?' Ganesh smiled.

Swami nodded and smiled back.

'And what happen to you, Partap? I see you cut yourself, man.'

'A little accident in Parcel Post,' Partap said, fingering the adhesive-plaster.

Ganesh had always thought of this man as Partap of Parcel Post. He managed to bring in the Parcel Post into almost any conversation, and Ganesh knew that to annoy him you only had to suggest that he worked in the Post Office. 'Parcel Post, please,' he would say coldly.