The Legend of Ulenspiegel Volume Ii Part 66

She, embracing him:

"Lamme," said she, "my husband, weep not: I am not what thou deemest: I have not belonged to this monk."

"Thou liest," said Lamme, weeping and grinding his teeth both at the same time. "Ah! I was never jealous, and now I am. Sad pa.s.sion, anger, and love, the need to slay and embrace. Begone, thou! no, stay! I was so good to her! Murder is master in me. My knife! Oh! this burns, devours, gnaws; thou laughest at me....

She embraced him weeping, gentle and submissive.

"Aye," said he, "I am a fool in my anger: aye, thou didst guard my honour, that honour a man is mad enough to hang on a woman's skirts. So it was for that thou wast wont to pick out thy sweetest smiles to ask me leave to go to the sermon with thy she-friends."

"Let me speak," said the woman, embracing him. "May I die on the instant if I deceive thee!"

"Die, then," said Lamme, "for thou art going to lie."

"Listen to me," said she.

"Speak or speak not," said he, "'tis all one to me."

"Broer Adriaensen," she said, "pa.s.sed for a good preacher; I went to hear him: he set the ecclesiastic and celibate estate above all others as being more proper to win paradise for the faithful. His eloquence was great and fiery: several wives of good repute, of whom I was one, and in especial a goodly number of widow women and girls, had their minds troubled by it. The estate of celibacy being so perfect, he enjoined upon us to dwell therein: we swore thenceforward no longer to be spouses...."

"Save to him, no doubt," said Lamme, weeping.

"Be silent," said she, angry.

"Go to," said he, "finish: thou hast fetched me a bitter blow; I shall never be whole of it."

"Yea," said she, "my man, when I shall be always with thee."

And she would fain have embraced and kissed him, but he repulsed her.

"The widows," said she, "swore between his hands never to marry again."

And Lamme listened to her, lost in his jealous musing.

Calleken, shamefaced, went on:

"He desired," she said, "to have no penitents save young and beauteous wives or maids: the others he sent back to their own cures. He established an order of devotees, making us all swear to have no other confessors but himself only: I swore it; my companions, more initiate than I, asked me if I was fain to be instructed in the Holy Discipline and the Holy Penance: I wished it. There was at Bruges, at the Stone Cutters' Quay, by the convent of the Franciscan friars, a house dwelt in by a woman called Calle de Najage, who gave girls instruction and lodging, for a gold carolus by the month: Broer Cornelis could enter her house without being seen to leave his cloister. It was to this house I went, into a little chamber where he was alone: there he ordered me to tell him all my natural and carnal inclinations: at first I dared not; but in the end I gave way, wept, and told him all."

"Alas!" wept Lamme, "and this swine monk thus received thy sweet confession."

"He still told me, and this is true, my husband, that above earthly modesty is a celestial modesty, through which we make unto G.o.d the sacrifice of our earthly shames, and that thus we avow to our confessors all our secret desires, and are then worthy to receive the Holy Discipline and the Holy Penance.

"In the end he made me strip naked before him, to receive upon my body, which had sinned, the too-light chastis.e.m.e.nt of my faults. One day he made me unclothe myself; I fainted when I must let my body linen fall: he revived me with salts and flasks.--''Tis well for this time, daughter,' said he, 'come back in two days' time and bring a rod.' That went on for long without ever ... I swear it before G.o.d and all his saints ... my man ... understand me ... look at me ... see if I lie: I remained pure and faithful ... I loved thee."

"Poor sweet body," said Lamme, "O stain upon thy marriage robe!"

"Lamme," said she, "he spoke in the name of G.o.d and of our Holy Mother Church; was I not to listen to him? I loved thee always, but I had sworn to the Virgin, by dreadful oaths, to deny myself to thee: yet I was weak, weak to thee. Dost thou recall the hostelry of Bruges? I was at the house of Calle de Najage thou didst pa.s.s by upon thine a.s.s with Ulenspiegel. I followed thee; I had a goodly sum of money; I spent nothing ever for myself. I saw thee an hungered: my heart pulled towards thee, I had pity and love."

"Where is he now?" asked Ulenspiegel.

Calleken replied:

"After an inquiry ordered by the magistrate and an investigation of evil men, Broer Andriaensen must needs leave Bruges, and took refuge in Antwerp. They told me on the flyboat that my man had made him prisoner."

"What!" said Lamme, "this monk I am fattening is...."

"He," answered Calleken, hiding her face.

"A hatchet! a hatchet!" said Lamme, "let me kill him, let me auction his fat, the lascivious he-goat! Quick, let us back to the ship. The skiff! where is the skiff?"

Nele said to him:

"'Tis a foul cruelty to kill or to wound a prisoner."

"Thou lookest on me with a cruel eye; wouldst thou prevent me?" said he.

"Aye," said she.

"Well, then," said Lamme, "I will do him no hurt: let me only fetch him out from his cage. The skiff! where is the skiff?"

They climbed down into it speedily; Lamme made haste to row, weeping the while.

"Thou art sad, husband?" said Calleken to him.

"Nay," said he, "I am glad: doubtless thou wilt never leave me again?"

"Never!" said she.

"Thou wast pure and faithful, thou sayest; but, sweet, my darling, beloved Calleken, I lived but to find thee, and lo, now, thanks to this monk, there will be poison in all our happiness, poison of jealousy ... as soon as I am sad or but only tired, I shall see thee naked, submitting thy lovely body to that infamous flagellation. The spring time of our loves was mine, but the summer was for him; the autumn will be gray, soon will come the winter to bury my faithful love."

"Thou art weeping?" said she.

"Aye," quoth he, "what is past can never come again."

Then Nele said:

"If Calleken was faithful, she ought to leave thee alone for thy ill words."

"He knoweth not how I love him," said Calleken.

"Dost thou say true?" cried Lamme; "come, darling; come, my wife; there is no longer gray autumn nor winter that diggeth graves."

And he seemed cheerful, and they came to the ship.

Ulenspiegel gave Lamme the keys of the cage, and he opened it; he tried to pull the monk out on the deck by the ear, but he could not; he tried to fetch him out sideways, he could not do that, either.

"We must break all; the capon is fattened," said he.

The monk then came forth, rolling about big daunted eyes, holding his paunch with both hands, and fell down on his seat because of a great wave that pa.s.sed beneath the ship.