The Italian's Rightful Bride Part 18

There was genuine rage in Gustavo's voice, enough to silence her, if only for a moment.

'Don't ever speak like that again,' he snapped. 'Don't even think it at the bottom of your scheming little mind.'

'All right, all right, there's no need to be like that. I'm only thinking of your welfare.'

'You were thinking of what suited you, and nothing else.'

'Well, I don't know what you're making such a fuss about. You need a rich wife and there aren't many who are richer than her. Goodness knows what she's doing working for a living.'

'Yes, you wouldn't understand that, would you?' he said harshly. 'Joanna works because she loves her subject more than anything in the world, except her son.'

'More than you?'

The question attacked him like a knife, making him draw in a sharp breath.

At last he spoke emphatically. 'Joanna does not love me.'

She surveyed him, her head on one side.

'Really? Well, I dare say you'd know all about that. Besides, there's no need to despair. With a little effort I'm sure you could make her love you-'

'Drop it,' he said in a low voice. 'Drop it if you know what's good for you.'

Crystal sighed. 'Oh, darling, how touchy you are. She's your best chance, and you'd be wise to take it and then-'

She checked herself and backed off at the murderous look in Gustavo's eyes.

'Go to h.e.l.l!' he told her with soft fury. 'Go to h.e.l.l and stay there. Do you understand me? Do you understand me?'

On the last words he raised his voice enough for it to carry faintly beyond the gla.s.s doors into the room, so that those standing nearest jumped and turned their heads. The next moment Gustavo erupted through the door and went straight to Joanna.

'If you're ready-' he said.

'Of course,' she said, wondering what could have happened to make him so pale.

He got through the farewells to their hosts as quickly as he could square with courtesy before drawing her out of the room. The last thing Joanna saw was Crystal, looking like the cat that had swallowed the cream. It was a look she recalled from long ago, and it made her shiver.

Not until they were shut into the back of the limousine and the chauffeur was starting the engine did Joanna say, 'For heaven's sake, what happened? Why were you shouting?'

'Because that woman...' He clenched his hands, realising the impossibility of telling Joanna anything about that conversation. 'I can't talk to her without getting angry.'

'Do you think she went there on purpose?'

'Oh, yes, she knew we were going to be there.'

'What about the fitness instructor?'

'She left him in Naples. Apparently it's all over.'

A tremor went along her nerves. She tried not to heed it. 'So she's back for good?' she asked lightly.

'She now has an apartment in Rome, and is talking about getting on with her life.'

'Was that what she wanted to tell you, and that made you so angry?'

'No, it was something else. Don't ask me, I can't tell you.'

His tone was abrupt because he felt hideously embarra.s.sed by Crystal's words. He resented the way she'd intruded on the delicate feelings that had been growing between himself and Joanna recently.

It was something he'd never known before, totally different from his pa.s.sion for Crystal, which had blazed across the sky like a comet before dying abruptly. He knew now that his love for her had been almost entirely physical, taking no account of the person she was. And when he'd discovered that person, the love was over.

With Joanna it was the reverse. He treasured her warmth, her gentleness and understanding, the mysterious sense that she held the world in her hands and could share it with him. Desiring her had come later.

She was the woman he wanted. Twelve years ago it had been too soon. Now the time was right for them.

Or, at least, for him. About her he was still unsure. To Crystal he'd given an instinctive denial, appalled by the way her cynicism was dirtying something so precious. But secretly he was still waiting to learn the truth.

Joanna had fallen silent and he realised that his tone must have sounded like a snub.

'Forgive me,' he said gently. 'I shouldn't take it out on you. I don't know what I'm saying. I just wish I could turn the clock back to before tonight.'

She gave a faint smile that he could only just make out in the gloom of the car.

'No use,' she murmured. 'I've often wanted to turn the clock back.'

'Yes, so have I. But I can never quite decide how far back to go.'

'To the last moment of happiness?' she said. 'Or the last moment before a terrible mistake? Or perhaps it doesn't matter, and we'd make the same mistake again. Because you couldn't look into the future and see what was waiting, any more than you could the first time.'

'Joanna, you're talking mysteries. What mistakes could you ever have made?'

She shook her head ruefully. 'Don't take any notice of me, Gustavo. I'm talking nonsense.'

He leaned closer, trying to see her face, wanting to know if the half-smile he fancied he saw was real, and, if so, what it meant.

'You never talk nonsense,' he said. 'It always means something, and it's always something that I want to know about.'

She shook her head. 'Now it's I who cannot tell you. You must let me have my secrets.'

But he too shook his head. 'No, I want to know your secrets. Every one of them. I want to know what you're thinking and feeling. I want-I want you you.'

He had sworn not to say it, but he was no longer in command of himself. He knew that he should not take her into his arms and kiss her, but nothing could have stopped him.

He knew now that he'd meant this to happen since the night of the wedding, the night that had been interrupted. Since then, whatever he'd been doing, at any moment of the night or day, he'd been thinking of her, needing her, wanting her.

To Joanna it was a thousand kisses in one. It was here and now, but it was also every kiss he'd ever given her in her dreams. But then she dismissed the dreams: ghostly memories, yearning fantasies. They had no reality against the man, warm and solid in her arms, covering her mouth with purposeful lips.

Her own lips moved against his, seeking him more deeply, thrilling as he responded with an urgency that was a promise.

A flash of light from a car coming in the other direction recalled them to their surroundings, and the presence of the chauffeur.

'We'll be home soon,' Gustavo said in a slightly strained voice.

'Yes,' she murmured, settling herself in the crook of his arm, her head against his shoulder.

For now this was all she asked, to be here with him in peace and tranquillity. Soon she would want much more from him, but it was what he wanted too, and that knowledge was part of the joy now.

So deep was her contentment that she almost dozed, until she heard him say, 'We're here,' just over her head.

They got quietly out of the car, trying to keep their arrival a secret from the rest of the house. Inside, he didn't switch on any lights, but stood looking at her face in the faint glow from the hall lamp. There was a question in his eyes, which she answered by laying her lips on his for a brief moment.

'Come,' she said, taking his hand and leading him up the stairs.

n.o.body saw them as they pa.s.sed quietly down the corridor to her room and closed the door behind them.

'Don't put the light on,' he whispered. 'We don't need light.'

'No,' she said. 'We don't need anything but this.'

She stepped back and removed the gold from her ears.

'Turn around,' he said, and began to work at the clasp of her gold necklace. She felt the touch of his fingers, setting off soft tremors of desire that whispered across her heated skin. When he'd finished and put the necklace aside he laid his lips in the same place, making her shiver pleasurably.

'Are you sure?' he said softly.

Through the pounding of her blood she managed to say, 'Yes,' but he was already drawing down the zip at the back of her dress.

She turned swiftly, letting the dress fall about her ankles, opening her arms to him in welcome, eager for him in every way.

'Oh, my love,' she said. 'Come to me. At last.'

It was Crystal's mocking voice in his dreams that awoke him.

'You need a rich wife, and there aren't many who are richer than her.'

He'd rejected the words, but they'd lingered, just out of sight, and now they pounced on him, shocking him into wakefulness.

He turned his head slowly to where Joanna lay still asleep in the dawn light. Through the sheet covering her he could see the outline of her beautiful nakedness, offered to him last night with such tenderness one moment, and such fierce intensity the next. But lovelier still was the sight of her face, soft and vulnerable on the pillow.

A rich wife!

It was horrible but true. Last night, overcome by both his love and his desire, he'd managed to believe that the disparity between them was unimportant. But in the cold light of day he knew it mattered.

What could he say to her? Speak of love while concealing the financial truth? His soul revolted at the thought.

Or how about, 'Marry me, and by the way I need some cash.' She knew of his debts, but not the sudden crisis of Crystal's demands. The truth would merely convince her that the past was repeating itself, and anything was better than that.

Throughout that long, pa.s.sionate night he'd been awed by what he discovered in her. The warmth and generosity that were part of her everyday life also infused her love-making. Her gifts were bountiful, and in response his whole being, not just his body but also his spirit, had been given a release that thrilled him.

He'd been startled by the strength of his own feelings, so much more intense than his mild affection for her twelve years ago, and so much deeper than his infatuation for Crystal. But the bitter fact was that there was no honest way he could approach her.

He'd discovered the truth only when it was too late.

He slipped out of bed and put on his clothes, moving quietly. When he'd finished he came over and dropped to his knees beside the bed, his face close to hers. She lay just as before, her expression as gentle and trusting as a child's. The kiss he placed on her forehead was so light that it didn't awaken her.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered. 'Try to forgive me.'

Joanna kept her eyes closed until the last minute, knowing that when she opened them the night would be over. What came next would be as sweet, or even sweeter, but nothing would ever quite equal that first revelation.

She had never stopped loving Gustavo for one moment. All this time she'd been deluding herself.

But now there needed to be no more delusions. She could love him freely, as he loved her. She didn't doubt his love, not after last night. And she knew that, when she finally allowed herself to wake, she would see that love in his eyes, watching over her.

To prolong the moment she stretched out, letting her hand wander over the place where he should have been. Finding nothing there, she lay still a moment, then opened her eyes and sat up, surveying the room.

Apart from herself it was empty.

Something in her refused to believe what she could see, because it simply wasn't possible that after the night they had spent together he should walk out and leave her to wake alone.

She thought of that night, the pa.s.sionate giving and taking, the fevered, incoherent words, the hot silences. He was a generous lover, inciting her gently, lovingly. His pa.s.sion had inspired her own, taking her to heights she'd never known before.

The descent had been melancholy, but it would have been forgotten in the joy of waking in his arms.

Of course, he'd left early to avoid being seen. But why hadn't he known that she would want him to wake her first?

Stop being childish, she reproved herself. It'll be all right when you see him.

Slipping out of bed, she pulled on a robe and went to the window, looking out over the rear lawns stretching away, and there, in the distance, Gustavo's tall figure wandering under the trees.

It seemed as though he had put as much distance between them as possible.

She turned away, unable to see him through the sudden blurring in her eyes.

Downstairs she found everyone cheerful. Freddy was planning to spend the day at the dig, which was going well.

Gustavo looked up when Joanna came into the breakfast room, and gave her a brief smile, with a shadow of constraint. Frowning, she made her way over to him by the window.

'I had to leave early,' he said quietly. 'I didn't want to be found walking the corridor in the early hours.'

'Like you found me, at Rannley Towers?' she said, with an attempt at teasing. 'Only you got the wrong idea.'