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'He's a son any parent could be proud of,' Gustavo reflected. 'A wonderful boy.'
'Yes, he is, isn't he?' she said, her face and voice softening as she thought of her darling.
'Is he very like his father?'
'In some ways. He gets his brains and his independence from me, and his outrageous charm from Freddy.'
'So your husband was very charming?'
'He is is. He may not be my husband any more, but he'll be charming until the day he dies.'
Her smile as she said this made Gustavo observe, 'You sound as if you're still fond of him.'
'I am. Enormously. I've grown more and more fond of him since our divorce. He's kind, amusing and great fun. In fact, he's the perfect party guest, and great company as long as you're not actually married to him.'
'Why did you break up?'
'Well, he's not the most reliable man in the world.'
'Other women?'
Joanna laughed.
'He did his best to be faithful, but nature didn't make him that way. As I said, it's easier to be friends with him now that I'm not married to him, and his waywardness doesn't matter. The nicest thing I know about him is that he's a terrific father. Billy adores him, and with reason.
'Mind you, I think that's partly because Freddy's still a kid at heart. And he's such an impractical dreamer. He'd invent something, and I'd give him the funds to market it, but it always flopped. Then there'd be something else.'
'And you always funded him,' Gustavo said in a voice with a slight edge. 'I wonder if that had anything to do with- No! No, I didn't say that. Please ignore it. No! No, I didn't say that. Please ignore it.'
He dropped his head into his hands, appalled at himself. Joanna rocked with laughter.
'You mean he may have married me for my money,' she said at last. 'Surely people don't do that these days?'
'Please, Joanna!' His voice was m.u.f.fled because his head was still sunk in an agony of embarra.s.sment. 'Must you throw that up at me?' His voice was m.u.f.fled because his head was still sunk in an agony of embarra.s.sment. 'Must you throw that up at me?'
'Throw what? Oh, that that?' She clutched her head as though just remembering something. 'You mean because you you were going to marry me for my money?' were going to marry me for my money?'
He ground his teeth. 'If you choose to put it that way.'
'Oh, don't be so silly!' she chided him, smiling. 'That was completely different.'
'All right, laugh at me, but it was was different. I really liked you a great deal. It would have been impossible otherwise.' different. I really liked you a great deal. It would have been impossible otherwise.'
'I know, I know,' she said soothingly. 'I'm sorry, Gustavo, I didn't mean to make fun of you. Well, perhaps I did, but only to cheer you up. You've got to admit it has its funny side.'
'Me, presuming to accuse your husband of mercenary intentions, you mean?'
'Not just that. Everything. The whole sorry mess. Oh, Gustavo, it wasn't meant to end like this. It wasn't what I...'
She had to stop and brush tears from her eyes. They had come suddenly, chasing away her laughter as she was swept by a sudden sense of futility.
'Wasn't what you what?' he asked. 'Joanna-'
'It's all right,' she said hastily. 'I only meant-it wasn't what I thought was going to happen.'
'I suppose what we expect never happens. Maybe there's no point in making plans at all.'
'You can't get through life without making plans,' she said wisely. 'You just have to be flexible about them.'
He pa.s.sed a hand over his eyes. 'Perhaps I should have had a little less whisky. It's time I went to my own room. Before I go-what are you planning to do after this?'
'Well-'
'I ask because I'm invited to a wedding in a couple of days.'
'What wedding?' she asked with sudden suspicion.
'Lady Henrietta Rannley to Lord Askleigh. It's at Rannley Towers. I expect you'll be there too.'
'Well, she is my second cousin, once removed.' Her lips twitched. 'I suppose Billy's been talking again.'
'Billy was very helpful,' he said carefully, 'about more than the name of your hotel.'
She regarded him, telling herself that this was a time for straight, clear thinking. But it was hard to think at all, confronted by the discovery that he had fixed all this to be with her. In fact, it was impossible to do anything but feel happy.
I must have a word with Billy, she thought. And tell him, thank you.
'So it looks like we're both going,' she said. 'Imagine that! I'd planned to go tomorrow and stay the night at Rannley Towers, before the wedding. I'm beginning to think you're bound to have made the same arrangements, so why don't we go together?'
She'd avoided looking at Gustavo while she said this. Now, receiving no reply, she turned back to him and discovered the reason for his silence.
Gustavo lay back on the sofa, his head resting on the cushions, his eyes closed.
'Hey,' she said gently.
He didn't respond and she suddenly realised that he was deeply asleep. It had come on him suddenly, leaving him no choice but to yield. It would be unkind to awaken him.
Moving carefully, so as not to disturb him, she raised his feet until he was fully stretched out, then fetched a blanket from the bedroom and draped it over him.
She paused a moment to study his face, relaxed in sleep, yet still with the shadow of tension on it. With his guard down at last he seemed different, more like the very young man she remembered.
Was she only imagining that he looked like a man relieved of a crushing burden after many years?
She turned off the lamp near his head and dropped a kiss on his forehead.
'Goodnight,' she whispered. 'Sweet dreams.'
She went back to her room calling herself all kinds of a self-deceiver. When she'd thought of meeting Gustavo again she'd been so sure of herself, so convinced of her own strength and wisdom.
If he'd approached her with ardour, she could have coped. She still believed that. Instead he'd reached out to her in friendship and need, and by doing so he'd breached all her defences.
It was too late now. They had spoken not one word of love, and yet the feeling between them that night had been more intense than many lovers ever knew.
She would have laughed, years ago, to think that her love could come to this, but now it had happened and it was the sweetest, most joyous thing that had ever happened to her.
She wanted to shout her happiness aloud to the world. The way ahead was no clearer than it had ever been, but she had become his rock.
And if I have to be content with that, she thought, then I will.
But then- The h.e.l.l I will! I won't be content with second-best. This time I want it all.
In the morning she found the sofa empty. Gustavo appeared just as she was finishing breakfast.
'I was going to leave you a note to apologise for my boorish manners,' he said, 'but I couldn't think what to say. So I just crept out like a criminal and went to my own room.'
'Don't make so much of it.' She smiled. 'I'll be ready to leave in an hour.'
'I'll be waiting for you downstairs. And, Joanna-thank you for everything.'
He made no further reference to the evening they had spent together, and the revealing things that had been said.
The train took them the fifty miles to the station near Rannley Towers, where they were met by Max, best man and brother of the groom. He'd never met Gustavo, but when he heard his name he looked startled and started to blurt out, 'Hey, aren't you the guy who...?' Then stopped and went red.
'Yes, that was me,' Gustavo said pleasantly. 'Shall we go?'
When they reached the house Etta came running to meet them. She too remembered Gustavo. As a child she'd been told little, but as a bridesmaid she'd worked out a good deal. Luckily she had more aplomb than Max, and the moment pa.s.sed without trouble.
The huge house was rapidly filling up with guests staying the night. Many of them remembered Joanna and recognised Gustavo, but it was an old scandal, and after a few curious looks they forgot this odd couple, and concentrated on the bride.
Joanna had dreaded coming to this place for a wedding, fearful of the memories it would disturb. But suddenly everything was different. She was here with Gustavo, knowing that she was the person whose company he wanted. When everyone congregated for a meal that night she went down on his arm.
Pa.s.sing through the hall, she caught a glimpse of the two of them in a long mirror and was struck afresh by his good looks, his upright bearing and a certain indefinable 'air' that would make any woman proud to be seen on his arm.
Her own appearance too had been transformed. She was no longer the gauche girl with no confidence in her own looks or personality. Now, in her soft blue gown, with diamonds in her ears and around her neck, she had the air of a woman who could take on the world and defeat it. Above all she looked as though she belonged with this handsome man.
As they walked, he turned slightly to glance at her. But for the mirror, she would never have noticed, but she saw the reflection of his quick look, the slight smile on his lips, the hint of pride in his eyes as he regarded her.
Then they moved on out of sight of the mirror. And when she next looked at him he was staring ahead, apparently oblivious.
It was a buffet meal so that the kitchen staff could concentrate on the demands of the wedding next day. This left the guests free to wander as they liked and Joanna's time was filled with renewing old friendships and catching up with her relatives.
Lord Rannley was particularly curious.
'What's going on?' he asked. 'You and him, here together?'
He was a charming man in his early fifties, with prematurely white hair that did nothing to mar his good looks. Joanna liked him, except that he was a little too eager to secure family advantage.
'Tommy,' she said now, 'if you're thinking what I'm thinking you're thinking, you can forget it.'
'So where's his wife? I heard rumours-'
'That's over. They're divorced.'
'And now he's here with you? Hmm!'
'I said forget it.'
'Really, my dear, you can't expect me to pa.s.s up the chance of adding a prince to the family. He slipped through our fingers last time but-'
'I'll tread on your toes in a minute.'
He grinned and dropped the subject, but a few moments later she saw him making friendly overtures to Gustavo. She could only hope that he wouldn't be too blatant about it.
She couldn't help noticing that, when Lord Rannley had left him, Gustavo wasn't at ease. The people here knew him only in connection with a past scandal, and he hated the feeling. But he'd w.a.n.gled an invitation and braved the stares, simply to be with her.
'It's getting late,' she said to him at last. 'I'm going to bed.'
'Me too,' he said, as all around them guests were beginning to drift away.
They said their goodnights and went up the stairs together.
'It'll be a long day tomorrow,' she said.
'And perhaps a hard one.'
'We won't let it be,' she promised. 'Goodnight.'
She hugged him. He hugged her. And they went their separate ways.
In her new mood of contentment Joanna nodded off as soon as her head touched the pillow, and slept without a break until dawn.
But then she was unceremoniously awoken by someone plumping down on her bed. Hands shook her fiercely and an urgent voice said, 'Joanna, wake up, please. Something absolutely terrible's happened. Something absolutely terrible's happened.'
'What? What's happened?'
Joanna struggled to awake and found Etta there, her face distraught.
'It's dreadful,' she wailed.
'What's dreadful? What's happened, Etta?'
'Gina's got flu,' she wailed.
'h.e.l.l!' Joanna said, not mincing matters. Gina was the matron of honour.