The Eleven Comedies Vol 2 Part 82

PLUTUS. I mightier than he?

CHREMYLUS. Aye, by heaven! For instance, what is the origin of the power that Zeus wields over the other G.o.ds?[741]

CARIO. 'Tis money; he has so much of it.

CHREMYLUS. And who gives it to him?

CARIO (_pointing to Plutus_). This fellow.

CHREMYLUS. If sacrifices are offered to him, is not Plutus their cause?

CARIO. Undoubtedly, for 'tis wealth that all demand and clamour most loudly for.

CHREMYLUS. Thus 'tis Plutus who is the fount of all the honours rendered to Zeus, whose worship he can wither up at the root, if it so please him.

PLUTUS. And how so?

CHREMYLUS. Not an ox, nor a cake, nor indeed anything at all could be offered, if you did not wish it.

PLUTUS. Why?

CHREMYLUS. Why? but what means are there to buy anything if you are not there to give the money? Hence if Zeus should cause you any trouble, you will destroy his power without other help.

PLUTUS. So 'tis because of me that sacrifices are offered to him?

CHREMYLUS. Most a.s.suredly. Whatever is dazzling, beautiful or charming in the eyes of mankind, comes from you. Does not everything depend on wealth?

CARIO. I myself was bought for a few coins; if I'm a slave, 'tis only because I was not rich.

CHREMYLUS. And what of the Corinthian courtesans?[742] If a poor man offers them proposals, they do not listen; but if it be a rich one, instantly they offer their b.u.t.tocks for his pleasure.

CARIO. 'Tis the same with the lads; they care not for love, to them money means everything.

CHREMYLUS. You speak of those who accept all comers; yet some of them are honest, and 'tis not money they ask of their patrons.

CARIO. What then?

CHREMYLUS. A fine horse, a pack of hounds.

CARIO. Aye, they would blush to ask for money and cleverly disguise their shame.

CHREMYLUS. 'Tis in you that every art, all human inventions, have had their origin; 'tis through you that one man sits cutting leather in his shop.

CARIO. That another fashions iron or wood.

CHREMYLUS. That yet another chases the gold he has received from you.

CARIO. That one is a fuller.

CHREMYLUS. That t'other washes wool.

CARIO. That this one is a tanner.

CHREMYLUS. And that other sells onions.

CARIO. And if the adulterer, caught red-handed, is depilated,[743] 'tis on account of you.[744]

PLUTUS. Oh! great G.o.ds! I knew naught of all this!

CARIO. Is it not he who lends the Great King all his pride?

CHREMYLUS. Is it not he who draws the citizens to the a.s.sembly?[745]

CARIO. And tell me, is it not you who equip the triremes?[746]

CHREMYLUS. And who feed our mercenaries at Corinth?[747]

CARIO. Are not you the cause of Pamphilus' sufferings?[748]

CHREMYLUS. And of the needle-seller's[749] with Pamphilus?

CARIO. Is it not because of you that Agyrrhius[750] lets wind so loudly?

CHREMYLUS. And that Philepsius[751] rolls off his fables?

CARIO. That troops are sent to succour the Egyptians?[752]

CHREMYLUS. And that Las is kept by Philonides?[753]

CARIO. That the tower of Timotheus[754] ...

CHREMYLUS. ... (_To Cario._) May it fall upon your head! (_To Plutus._) In short, Plutus, 'tis through you that everything is done; be it known to you that you are the sole cause both of good and evil.

CARIO. In war, 'tis the flag under which you serve that victory favours.

PLUTUS. What! I can do so many things by myself and unaided?

CHREMYLUS. And many others besides; wherefore men are never tired of your gifts. They get weary of all else,--of love ...

CARIO. Of bread.

CHREMYLUS. Of music.

CARIO. Of sweetmeats.

CHREMYLUS. Of honours.

CARIO. Of cakes.