The Dramatist; or Stop Him Who Can! Part 12

_Flor._ Hey-day!--my old acquaintance, Peter! where's my brother?

_Peter._ Sir, he has been out the whole evening.

_Louisa._ In the same house with Neville!--oh, Heavens!

_Flor._ Well, Miss Courtney, I hope now you are convinced of your safety.

_Louisa._ Yes, sir, but I would it were in any other place; lady Waitfor't, ere this, is in pursuit of me, and if she discovers me here, you know too well how much I have to dread.

[_Knock at the Door.--Exit PETER._

_Flor._ Don't be alarm'd, there's nothing shall molest you.

_Louisa._ Oh, sir, you don't know the endless malice of lady Waitfor't--she will triumph in my misery, and till my lord is convinced of her duplicity, I see no hope of your brother's happiness, or my own.

_Enter PETER._

_Peter._ Lady Waitfor't is below, inquiring for that lady, or my master.

_Flor._ For my brother?

_Peter._ Yes, sir, and my lord has sent to know if Mr Vapid, or her ladyship, have been here;--he was in bed, but on receiving a letter, got up, and will be here in an instant.

_Louisa._ For Heaven's sake, Mr Floriville, let me retire,--I cannot support the conflict.

_Flor._ Promise to recall your spirits, and you shall.

_Louisa._ What I can do I will.

_Flor._ Then know no apprehension, for, on my life, you shall not be disturbed.

[_Leads her to the Door of the Library, and talks in dumb show._

_Vapid._ [_From Closet._] Peter! Peter! can't you release me?

_Peter._ No, sir, don't move, you'll ruin every thing.

_Vapid._ Then give me that candle--I have pen and ink--I think I could finish my epilogue.

_Peter._ Here, sir. [_Giving Candle._

_Vapid._ That curst half line--"Die all"-- [_PETER shuts him in._

_Flor._ So, now, the storm begins, and if I don't have some sport with the enemy--[_Sits at Table, and begins drinking._]--here she comes.

_Enter LADY WAITFOR'T._

_Flor._ Chairs, Peter, chairs,--Sit down, ma'am--sit down--you honour me exceedingly.

_Lady._ Where is your brother, sir? I insist on seeing him.

_Enter LORD SCRATCH._

_Lord._ There she is!--in a man's lodgings at midnight--here's treatment!

_Lady._ My lord, I came here in search of Louisa, who has been betrayed from my power.

_Lord._ Look ye, my lady--read that letter, that's all; read that letter, and then say, if we sha'n't both cut a figure in the print shops.

_Lady._ [_Taking Letter._] Ha! Willoughby's hand! [_Reads._] _Lady Waitfor't, (I have only time to tell you) is gone to Neville's lodgings, to meet one she has long had a pa.s.sion for--follow her, and be convinced of her duplicity._ Oh, the villain! well, my lord, and pray who is the man I come to meet?

_Lord._ Why, who should it be but the stage ruffian? if there was a sofa in the room, my life on't, he'd pop from behind it.--Zounds! that fellow will lay straw before my door every nine months!

_Lady._ This is fortunate.--[_Aside._]--Well, sir, if I discover Louisa, I hope you'll be convinced I came here to redeem her, and not disgrace myself. Tell me, sir, immediately, where she is concealed.

[_To FLORIVILLE._

_Flor._ Sit down, ma'am--sit down: drink, drink, then we'll talk over the whole affair--there is no doing business without wine; come, here's "The glory of gallantry"--I'm sure you'll both drink that.

_Lady._ No trifling, sir; tell me where she is concealed;--nay, then I'll examine the apartment myself--[_Goes to Door of Library._]--the door lock'd! give me the key, sir.

_Flor._ [_Drinking._] "The glory of gallantry, ma'am."

_Lord._ Hear me, sir, if the lady's in that apartment, I shall be convinced that you and your brother are the sole authors of all this treachery; if she is there, by the honour of my ancestors, she shall be Willoughby's wife to-morrow morning.

_Flor._ [_Rising._] Shall she, my lord? Pray, were you ever in Italy?

_Lord._ Why, c.o.xcomb?

_Flor._ Because, I'm afraid you've been bitten by a tarantula--you'll excuse me, but the symptoms are wonderfully alarming--There is a blazing fury in your eye--a wild emotion in your countenance, and a green spot--

_Lord._ d.a.m.n the green spot! open that door, and let me see immediately: I'm a peer, and have a right to look at any thing.

_Flor._ [_Standing before the Door._] No, sir; this door must not be open'd.

_Lord._ Then I'll forget my peerage, and draw my sword.

_Flor._ [_To LADY WAITFOR'T, who is going to interfere._] Don't be alarm'd, ma'am, I'll only indulge him for my own amus.e.m.e.nt--mere trout fishing, ma'am--

_Enter LOUISA, from the Apartment._

_Louisa._ Hold! I charge you, hold!--let not my unhappy fate be the source of more calamities.

_Lord._ 'Tis she herself:--My lady did not come to meet the madman.

_Flor._ By the lord, ma'am, you have ruined all.

_Louisa._ I know, sir, the consequences of this discovery, and I abide by them.--But what I have done, I can justify, and 'would to Heaven all here could do the same!

_Flor._ Indeed, I can't tell--I wish I was in Italy.