The Casual Ward Part 4

"Why, Phileleutheros," I said, "are you not a democrat?"

"Of course I am."

"And in a democracy do not the people rule?"

"I suppose so."

"By saying what they wish to have done, or otherwise?"

"By saying so, I suppose."

"And if they are not allowed to say what they wish, they are not ruling, and it is not a democracy?"

"Perhaps."

"Then Balphurios, who asks the people what they wish, is a democratic man; and Askothios, who does not ask them, is not a democratic man; nor are you one, apparently, O Phileleutheros."

"This is all nonsense, Socrates," he said. "Balphurios cannot be a democrat: for I am a democrat, and I do not agree with Balphurios. And you have not the least conception of what is meant by democracy: which is, that certain persons are chosen by the majority of the citizens that they may sit in the Ecclesia and carry out the wishes of the people."

"But for what reasons do you choose such persons?" I asked.

"They ought to be chosen, Socrates," he replied, "because they possess the qualities proper to democratic men."

"You mean," I said, "that they must hate and speak evil of the rich; and that they must wish to diminish the number of our triremes; and that they must refuse to tax Megarian imports; and that they must be conscious of their own virtues and the vices of others."

"I do not altogether praise your definition; but it will do."

"But with all these qualities," I said, "will your ecclesiasts always know what you wish when something unexpected happens about which it is necessary to decide? For instance, if one of the chief speakers proposes a law that all burglars should be honoured by dinners in the Prytaneum, will not your ecclesiasts come to us and say, 'O Socrates and Phileleutheros, we possess all the qualities proper to democratic men: we are conscious of our own virtues, and we should like to diminish the number of your triremes: and for these qualities we have been elected; but as to this matter of giving burglars a dinner in the Prytaneum, about this we do not yet know your wishes: and we would gladly be informed by you?'"

"If they do not know our wishes of themselves," said Phileleutheros, "they will suffer for it at the next election."

"That is very unpleasant for them," I replied. "Suppose now that you hired an architect to build you a house, and that while he was building it he needed your advice, and came and said to you, 'O Phileleutheros, I have given your house four walls and a roof according to your wishes; but you have not yet told me whether your banqueting-hall ought to have three windows or six. About this I do not yet know your wishes, and I would gladly be informed by you.' Will you then say to him that you have no authority to tell him your wishes any more, but that if he happens to decide contrary to your will you will not employ him again? Similarly, it seems to me, you are in danger of making the Ecclesia no longer the agent of your wishes, but it and those who lead it will be now and then tyrants and not your servants-if to make laws not according to the will of the people is tyranny. And you can punish the ecclesiasts by dismissing them after a time, of course; but you will only elect others who will be tyrants again in the same way as their predecessors."

"But the Nomothetae, Socrates, will prevent them."

"Hardly," I replied. "For your leaders of the Ecclesia, who are democrats and will not consult the people, and whom you praise, will ask the Nomothetae for their opinion three times; and when thereby they are quite satisfied that their proposal is displeasing to the Nomothetae it will forthwith become law. So that the conclusion is this: that the leaders of the Ecclesia will in most cases have authority to do what they like without consulting anybody. And these leaders, Askothios and his friends, are few in relation to the ma.s.s of the citizens, are they not?"

"They are not many, certainly."

"That is something to be thankful for," I said. "They then, being few, will rule for the time; and when the few rule, that is oligarchy. Is it not? Unless perhaps you will say that when your enemies are in power in the Ecclesia, it is oligarchy; but when your friends are in power, then it is democracy?"

"Socrates, you are right, for once. That is precisely what I do say."

THE TUTOR'S EXPEDIENT

"Come in" said the Senior Tutor of St. Boniface: and two scholars came in. (He knew they were scholars, because this was his hour for seeing scholars.) One was a heavy-looking young man in a frock coat and tall hat. The other was a spruce youth, who looked as if nature had intended him for an attorney's clerk; as, indeed, nature had.

"Scholars, I presume, gentlemen?" inquired the Tutor. The young men bowed. "In what subjects, may I ask? You, sir" (turning to the spruce youth) "Mr.-I forget your name-eh? Oh, thanks-is it Cla.s.sics? History?

Natural Science, perhaps?"

"Oh no, sir; I hold a 'Daily Thunderer' Scholarship."

"Exactly: I remember now. You read all through _t.i.t-Bits_ for a whole year, and the 'D. T.' pays you-l,200, isn't it? The task is a little dear at the price, it always seemed to me: but still, _t.i.t-Bits_-"

"It isn't quite that, sir," put in the youth; "it was for the 'Encyclop-'"

("I _knew_ it was dear at the price," the Tutor murmured.)

'"-aedia Pananglica,'" continued the scholar. "My Scholarship is for reading that. I have it outside, in three packing-cases."

"The Scholarship?" asked the Tutor, weakly.

"No," said the scholar; "the 'Encyclopaedia Pananglica.'"

"Well," the academic dignitary resumed, "and what have you read? To prepare yourself for a university career, I mean."

"The 'Encyc-'"

"Of course, of course; but anything else? I wish to know so as to advise you with respect to the direction of your studies. Have you, for instance, read any Homer?"

"Homer!" the youth replied-"Oh, yes, I know about Homer. There is a picture of Homer, drawn from life, and very well reproduced, among the ill.u.s.trations of the article 'Education.' There is one there of Comenius, too. Homer and Comenius-"

"Were both educationists, I know," said the Tutor: "but not, properly speaking, in the same way. However-you have not studied the father of poetry in the original, it would appear. Any Xenophon, perhaps? or Caesar?"

"I don't think I know much about Xenophon," replied the young man, "but I have a friend who failed in Caesar for the Cambridge Locals, and he said it was pretty easy."

"Do you know _any_ Greek or Latin at all?"

"Well, as I came along I bought a Delectus: I was told it might be helpful for attaining the highest honours."

"Exactly. You thought it might be helpful-of course, of course. You were quite right-perfectly, perfectly correct," the Tutor murmured, with a faraway look in his eyes. Then he collected himself, and turned to the other aspirant. "And you, sir-pardon me, I didn't quite catch-eh? Oh, thanks!-what, may I ask, are the conditions on which you hold _your_ Scholarship?"

"My education," replied the heavy young man, "was completed at the Jabez H. Brown University of Thessalonica, Maine, U.S.A. I am a recipient of a Scholarship under the provisions of the will of the Right Honourable Cecil J. Rhodes, the eminent philanthropist. No doubt, Professor, you will have heard of him."

"Ah! a Rhodes Scholar," said the Tutor. "That is better-much better.

You will, no doubt, study the Cla.s.sics. There are those (I am well aware) who are disposed to object to modern American Scholarship as an excessive attention to minutiae: but personally, I confess, I am no enemy even to a meticulous exactness, which alone can save us from an incurious and slipshod rhetoric! . . . And what, then, are the points of scholarship which it has been your endeavour to elucidate? Have you followed in the steps of the lamented Professor Drybones of Chicago, who died before he could prove, by a complete enumeration of all the instances in Greek literature, that ??? is never the first word of a sentence? Have you-"

"Pardon me, Professor," put in the Rhodes Scholar. "That ain't my platform at all. I may say, I don't take any stock in literatoor."

"Am I then to understand," the Tutor asked, "that you are _not_ acquainted with the Greek and Latin Cla.s.sics?"

"Not considerable," replied the American. "In fact, not any."

"And to what, then, have your studies been directed?"