The Busie Body Part 2

_Cha._ A good a.s.surance! But heark ye, how came your Beautiful Countenance clouded in the wrong place?

_Marpl._ I must confess 'tis a little _Mal-a-propos_, but no matter for that; a Word with you, _Charles_; Prithee, introduce me to Sir _George_--he is a Man of Wit, and I'd give ten Guinea's to--

_Cha._ When you have 'em, you mean.

_Marpl._ Ay, when I have 'em; pugh, pox, you cut the Thread of my Discourse--I wou'd give ten Guinea's, I say, to be rank'd in his Acquaintance: Well, 'tis a vast Addition to a Man's Fortune, according to the Rout of the World, to be seen in the Company of Leading Men; for then we are all thought to be Politicians, or Whigs, or Jacks, or High-Flyers, or Low-Flyers, or Levellers--and so forth; for you must know, we all herd in Parties now.

_Cha._ Then a Fool for Diversion is out of Fashion, I find.

_Marpl._ Yes, without it be a mimicking Fool, and they are Darlings every where; but prithee introduce me.

_Cha._ Well, on Condition you'll give us a true Account how you came by that Mourning Nose, I will.

_Marpl._ I'll do it.

_Cha._ Sir _George_, here's a Gentleman has a pa.s.sionate Desire to kiss your Hand.

Sir _Geo._ Oh, I honour Men of the Sword, and I presume this Gentleman is lately come from _Spain_ or _Portugal_--by his Scars.

_Marpl._ No really, Sir _George_, mine sprung from civil Fury, happening last Night into the Groom-Porters--I had a strong Inclination to go ten Guineas with a sort of a, sort of a--kind of a Milk Sop, as I thought: A Pox of the Dice he flung out, and my Pockets being empty as _Charles_ knows they sometimes are, he prov'd a surly _North-Britain_, and broke my Face for my Deficiency.

Sir _Geo._ Ha! ha! and did not you draw?

_Marpl._ Draw, Sir, why, I did but lay my Hand upon my Sword to make a swift Retreat, and he roar'd out. Now the Deel a Ma sol, Sir, gin ye touch yer Steel, Ise whip mine through yer Wem.

Sir _Geo._ Ha, ha, ha,

_Cha._ Ha, ha, ha, ha, fase was the Word, so you walk'd off, I suppose.

_Marp._ Yes, for I avoid fighting, purely to be serviceable to my Friends you know--

Sir _Geo._ Your Friends are much oblig'd to you, Sir, I hope you'll rank me in that Number.

_Marpl._ Sir _George_, a Bow from the side Box, or to be seen in your Chariot, binds me ever yours.

Sir _Geo._ Trifles, you may command 'em when you please.

_Cha._ Provided he may command you--

_Marpl._ Me! why I live for no other purpose--Sir _George_, I have the Honour to be carest by most of the reigning Toasts of the Town, I'll tell 'em you are the finest Gentleman--

Sir _Geo._ No, no, prithee let me alone to tell the Ladies--my Parts--can you convey a Letter upon Occasion, or deliver a Message with an Air of Business, Ha!

_Marpl._ With the a.s.surance of a Page and the Gravity of a Statesman.

Sir _Geo._ You know _Miranda!_

_Marpl._ What, my Sister _Ward?_ Why, her Guardian is mine, we are Fellow Sufferers: Ah! he is a covetous, cheating, sanctify'd Curmudgeon; that Sir _Francis Gripe_ is a d.a.m.n'd old--

_Char._ I suppose, Friend, you forget that he is my Father--

_Marpl._ I ask your Pardon, _Charles_, but it is for your sake I hate him. Well, I say, the World is mistaken in him, his Out-side Piety, makes him every Man's Executor, and his Inside Cunning, makes him every Heir's Jaylor. Egad, _Charles_, I'm half persuaded that thou'rt some _Ward_ too, and never of his getting: For thou art as honest a Debauchee as ever Cuckolded Man of Quality.

Sir _Geo._ A pleasant Fellow.

_Cha._ The Dog is Diverting sometimes, or there wou'd be no enduring his Impertinence: He is pressing to be employ'd and willing to execute, but some ill Fate generally attends all he undertakes, and he oftner spoils an Intreague than helps it--

_Marpl._ If I miscarry 'tis none of my Fault, I follow my Instructions.

_Cha._ Yes, witness the Merchant's Wife.

_Marpl._ Pish, Pox, that was an Accident.

Sir _Geo._ What was it, prithee?

_Ch._ Why, you must know, I had lent a certain Merchant my hunting Horses, and was to have met his Wife in his Absence: Sending him along with my Groom to make the Complement, and to deliver a Letter to the Lady at the same time; what does he do, but gives the Husband the Letter, and offers her the Horses.

_Marpl._ I remember you was even with me, for you deny'd the Letter to be yours, and swore I had a design upon her, which my Bones paid for.

_Cha._ Come, Sir _George_, let's walk round, if you are not ingag'd, for I have sent my Man upon a little earnest Business, and have order'd him to bring me the Answer into the Park.

_Marpl._ Business, and I not know it, Egad I'll watch him.

Sir _Geo._ I must beg your Pardon, _Charles_, I am to meet your Father here.

_Ch._ My Father!

Sir _Geo._ Aye! and about the oddest Bargain perhaps you ever heard off; but I'll not impart till I know the Success.

_Marpl._ What can his Business be with Sir _Francis?_ Now wou'd I give all the World to know it; why the Devil should not one know every Man's Concern.

(_Aside_.

_Cha._ Prosperity to't whate'er it be, I have private Affairs too; over a Bottle we'll compare Notes.

_Marpl._ _Charles_ knows I love a Gla.s.s as well as any Man, I'll make one; shall it be to Night? Ad I long to know their Secrets.

(_Aside._

_Enter _Whisper_._

_Whis._ Sir, Sir, Mis _Patch_ says, _Isabinda_'s Spanish Father has quite spoil'd the Plot, and she can't meet you in the Park, but he infallibly will go out this Afternoon, she says; but I must step again to know the Hour.

_Marpl._ What did _Whisper_ say now? I shall go stark Mad, if I'm not let into this Secret.

(_Aside._

_Cha._ Curst Misfortune, come along with me, my Heart feels Pleasure at her Name. Sir _George_, yours; we'll meet at the old place the usual Hour.

Sir _Geo._ Agreed; I think I see Sir _Francis_ yonder.

(_Exit._