The Allure Of Julian Lefray Part 13

"Stop f.u.c.king pounding. We're coming," Julian yelled.

"Julian- He shook his head and looked away. "If you had any idea how much I'm restraining myself right now, you'd tie that bikini back up and put your dress back on." His hazel eyes swept across me. "I'm two seconds away from f.u.c.king you while she listens outside."

My mouth dropped.

"It's your call."

Chapter Twenty.

Julian Can someone die from a case of blue b.a.l.l.s? Would I be the first?

I was due to visit Lorena on Sunday afternoon. We had an entire sheet of topics to cover that she'd emailed to me the night before. (Apparently you have a lot of time to create Excel spreadsheets in rehab.) I needed to get my head in the game but I'd hardly managed to sleep off my hangover from the day before. Every time I took a step, it felt like a donkey was dropkicking the back of my head, and I was still carrying around the weight of what could have been, thanks to the boat-ride-from-h.e.l.l the day before. The next time Dean invited me on his boat, I was going to come prepared with a box of condoms, a padlock, and a port-a-potty for the top deck. For f.u.c.k's sake, I'd been two seconds away from reaching the pinnacle of nirvana, and White Wine Wendy couldn't hold her pee for a minute longer.

WE WERE ON A BOAT. Pee off the side dammit.

"Julian! My beautiful, annoying big brother," Lorena sang as I pushed through the door to her room. She was sitting at her kitchen table with papers spread out around her, clearly ready to conduct business. Me? I was ready to stick my head between my knees and pray for the apocalypse. The fiery pits of h.e.l.l had nothing on the pounding headache positioned right behind my eyes.

"C'mon. You're walking like a snail. We have a lot to get done and I have a rebirthing ceremony at noon."

I arched a brow. "Rebirthing ceremony?"

She shrugged. "They give you cookies. It's the only time they give you actual sugar in this place. It makes no sense. I was addicted to cocaine, not sweets. Why do I have to pretend to be 'born anew' to have some freaking candy?"

"I'll sneak you in some the next time I visit," I promised, pulling out the chair across from her. The sound of the metal legs sc.r.a.ping against the floor felt like daggers stabbing my head.

I leaned against the seat and waited for the room to stop spinning. When it did, I was met with a smiling Lorena, clearly pleased to see how s.h.i.tty I felt.

She looked more like her old self than she had in years. Gold bracelets encased her right wrist, jingling every time she moved. She was wearing bright green gla.s.ses and her hair was braided across the crown of her head. Her shirt read, "Black is the new black," which I found funny even in my present state. She looked like the Lorena I'd grown up with, the creative genius that no one really understood.

"Do you have any new s.p.a.ces for me to look at?" she asked, drawing the topic back to work.

I groaned and forced myself to get it together. I'd promised Lorena I'd take care of her business while she was in rehab, and I didn't want to let her down.

Josephine and I had narrowed down our top three picks for her store. I pa.s.sed Lorena a folder with photos and floor plans of the three s.p.a.ces. She vetoed the first two right away, cursing their uppity locations. The third one-the location Jo had found during her morning walk-Lorena loved.

"And it's within our price range?" she asked, scanning through the photos I'd brought along with me.

"It's at the top, but the foot traffic would ensure that the storefront would pay for itself. We'd convert the back s.p.a.ce to offices. I think people will like the idea of shopping at your store, knowing there's a chance that they'll get to meet you while they're there."

She nodded, enamored with the photos. "I completely agree. I can't compete with Michael Kors, but there's something about a designer you get to know. Everyone wants to brag to their friends that they bought a dress that the designer handpicked for them."

"Exactly."

"When can we move in?" she asked, glancing up at me with her bright hazel eyes.

I smiled. "Next week if we incentivize the landlord. It'll take a few months to renovate, so the sooner we're in, the better," I said.

"Let's do it then." She dropped the folder and stared up at me, her features infused with excitement for the first time in months. "Next topic."

I nearly slept with your one and only employee and now I'm worried she's going to quit and leave us high and dry.

"Julian?" Lorena asked, eyeing me with suspicion.

"Oh, um," I scanned down our itinerary, unable to focus on a single line.

"Did you talk to Mom? Is that why you're off?"

My gaze shot back up to her. "No?"

"You still haven't seen her since you've been in town?"

She seemed surprised.

"Why would I see Mom?"

Lorena flattened her hands across the edge of the table, collecting her thoughts. I settled into my chair, prepared for a lecture. When she pushed her gla.s.ses up onto the top of her head, I knew I was really in for it.

"I am the first person to throw Mom under the bus. Believe me, I barely like her at this point."

For good reason. Lucy Lefray was from New York royalty. She'd grown up around the Vanderbilts and the Rockefellers in the upper echelon of wealth, lived the life reserved for the top one percent of the one percent. From a young age, she'd groomed me to run a Fortune 500 company and marry some suitable socialite by the age of twenty-five. Lorena? My mother could hardly look at her. A fashion designer? Lorena might as well have been a prost.i.tute for the way my mom sneered at her. I can still remember the day Lorena dyed her hair for the first time. My mother didn't leave her room for a week. She acted as if Lorena had killed the family pet. Lorena had added blonde highlights to her brown hair. The horror.

"So if we both don't like her then it's settled." I smiled and scanned down the list of items left to discuss.

Lorena cleared her throat until I finally looked up and met her eye. "She's older now, Julian. Her edges are starting to soften and I think it would mean a lot if you stopped by to see her, or at the very least, let her know you're back in town. It'd break her heart to realize that you're in New York and you don't even care to see her."

"I'll shoot her a text message."

"Julian," Lorena chastised.

I held up my hands. "Fine. I'll think about it, Lorena. I have a lot on my mind, least of which is whether or not I should try to schedule a tea time with Mom."

Lorena smiled and picked up her itinerary.

"Perfect. Okay, on to topic number two. I think it's about time for me to meet our Employee of the Month!"

Jesus Christ. Someone get me a beer.

Chapter Twenty-One.

Josephine It was the Monday after the "boating incident" where I'd almost let Julian ravish me below the deck-no pun intended-and I was not prepared to go into work. I had the same kind of dread in my stomach that built up right before I had to wax my hoohah before swim season.

I took my time applying my makeup, trying to relax myself. I'd called Lily the night before to get her opinion on the matter, but she'd only made me feel worse.

I think a part of her was shocked that I'd let it go that far.

"The plan was for you to move to New York so you could get a job and an apartment before I move up there in a few months. This plan did not include sleeping with your boss. Don't you see how that could not only jeopardize your career at Lorena Lefray Designs but also EVERYWHERE else in the entire city? Seriously, Jo, is his p.e.n.i.s made of pure gold? Ivory? Does it sparkle? Because sleeping with him cannot be worth more than your career in fashion. Think about it."

"I know that! You don't have to tell me that," I huffed into the phone. "Don't you think I'm already panicking enough as is? He was drunk and I almost took full advantage of him!"

Lily didn't believe that for a second.

"You two have been circling around each other like a couple of bloodthirsty sharks. You did not take advantage of him."

I groaned.

"Just focus on what's important, Jo. I'll be moving up in a month and then you won't have to hang out with Julian anymore. You'll have me."

Just hearing her rea.s.sure me that she was headed to New York melted away most of my anxiety. I needed her in New York. I needed reinforcements. If Lily had been with me on that boat, I never would have let it go that far with Julian.

"Once I have the money saved for a bus ticket and first month's rent, I'm there," Lily said.

I made her swear to that promise.

After we'd hung up, I'd made a promise with myself not to screw up the opportunity that had fallen into my lap. There were any number of outcomes that could happen if Julian and I decided to pursue some kind of relationship. All but one of them ended in a break-up and my inevitable termination from the company. Truthfully, I knew I only had one option: I would continue on as Julian's employee and his friend, nothing more. We'd be cordial, I'd get my job done, impress him, and move my way up in the world.

I couldn't let this job slip through my fingers. I had debt collectors at my door, next month's rent to worry about, and Lily couldn't move to New York if I was unemployed. I owed it to her to commit to the position I'd been given, even if that included putting my love life on the backburner for the time being. This conclusion meant that I had to be upfront with Julian.

I huffed out a breath of air and pushed off the counter to pick out the most conservative outfit I could find. I settled on a loose pair of slacks and a boring, gray blouse that completely hid away every ounce of cleavage. I pulled my hair into a low bun and slipped on a pair of flats. Hopefully the message I was trying to send would come across loud and clear. Me = employee. You = boss. Even a caveman could understand that.

By the time I started my trek to work, I was still trying to push aside stray memories from the boat. One particularly vivid image-Julian gripping my hands in place above my head-had just played out in my mind when my phone vibrated in my pocket. My hand shook as I reached in my purse, a.s.suming it would be Julian calling.

It wasn't.

My mother's face lit up my small screen and my stomach dropped. I hadn't talked to her in weeks and this was the precise moment she chose to call me? I veered off to the side of the sidewalk and leaned against the side of a building to try to drown out a bit of the street noise.

"h.e.l.lo?" I asked after the call connected.

"Josie. It's Mom. Is this a good time to talk?"

I stared out across the sidewalk. Technically, I had ten minutes until I was supposed to be at work and I was already a block away from Julian's hotel. I had no excuse.

"Yes. Yeah, can you hear me all right?"

The morning streets were full of honking taxis and bustling pedestrians scurrying to work as quickly as possible. Chances were it sounded like I was in the middle of a circus.

"Yes. I have you on speakerphone over here so your dad can hear too."

I smiled. "Hi Dad."

"Hi Jos," he chimed in.

I hadn't heard from either of them in a month and now they were calling me together? Something was up.

"How are you getting on in New York?" she asked.

"Good," I replied, treading lightly.

"We read up on the news every day. Looks like someone gets mugged or killed every night of the week up there."

And yet they didn't think it was necessary to check up on me until now...

"Yeah, but I don't walk around at night and I always have pepper spray on me."

"You know you wouldn't need that pepper spray back home..." my mother mumbled.

You're right, 'cause I'd hurl myself off a bridge from sheer boredom before I ever got the chance to use it.

"How are things at the shop, Dad?" I asked, ignoring my mom's little dig.

"Oh, same as always. Slow, but steady."

"Slow but steady" could have been the motto of my entire hometown. Seriously.

"Well we just wanted to check up on you. I know you're busy with all of those New York dreams of yours... will you be making it home anytime soon? Maybe for your dad's sixtieth next month?"

Guilt clawed its way up my vocal cords until I had to clear my throat just to be sure I could still talk.

"I'll try. Really."

I knew I was making false promises, but I couldn't tell them the truth. I had so many people watching and waiting for me to fail. I'm sure every single person in my hometown had placed a bet on how long I'd manage to stay in New York before crawling my way back home. They'd all taken it as almost a personal insult that I'd wanted to leave and make something of my life. They'd sleep a little better at night knowing that I'd gone out to fulfill my dreams and landed face first in the dirt.

Why?

Because it meant that every time they got the urge to reach for more, to dream a little bit bigger, they could rest easy in their ranch-style house, with their .2 acres of land and their 2.5 children, knowing they'd made the right decision-the proper decision-while "that ol' Josephine Keller wasted her youth on foolish dreams."

I'd be d.a.m.ned if I let them see me fail.

"Listen Mom, I gotta go. I need to get to work. I'll let you know if I'll be able to come home next month."

Before she could reply, I hung up and shoved my phone back into my purse. Fierce determination coursed through my veins. All memories of the boat ride were packed away and shoved below. For now, I needed to focus on myself.

Chapter Twenty-Two.