Tales of Northumbria Part 6

'Well, Harry was a driver, as I said, an' he an' the galloway was comin' doon an incline wiv a full tub, an' the galloway, hevin'

bolted, dragged the tub off the lines, an' came blindly tearin' along this side an' that smash up inti Jack as he rounded an awkward corner.

He was fearfu' knocked aboot when he was picked up, they said, his head bashed in bi the tub's wheels, an' there he lay, dead as mutton.

'The crowner comes doon an' sits on the body, an' the jury bring it in "Death by mis'dventure" slap off, bein' iv a hurry likelies ti get oot for their dinners, an' there the whole thing would have ended wiv a buryin' an' a gettin' up mevvies ov a bit subscription fer his missus an' the bairn; ay, that's hoo it would have ended up had it not been for "the Heckler."

'I wasn't allowed oot by the doctor, sae I was just forced to think it oot aal maa lane--mevvies havin' my eyes blindfolded helped us a bit; anyways, I lay there quiet i' bed an' found I could think it aal oot like Gladstone; ay, an' I tell thoo that Gladstone an' Horbert Spencor together cudn't have thought harder than I did at that period o' time, nor have pieced the puzzle together bettor than us. It sounds like a bit brag, mevvies, but it isn't, by Gox! it's just the naked truth.

'Well, there I lay between the sheets wi' my "linin's" on, detarmined that if there had been any foul play nowt but death should stop us frae findin' it oot. First thing I does is ti get the wife ti ask Harry Nicholson in ti tea wiv us, so as ti hear aal aboot hoo it happened.

'Well, efter he has been well filled oot wi' tea, an' spice loaf, an'

jam an' aal, I gets him ti tell the whole story, an' then I axes him a few supernumerary questions.

'"Thoo'll ken 'Tom the scholar?'" I axes him--"him that's a stoneman doon the pit, an' gans in for spiritualism an' sich like for his hobby an' pastime?" "Ay," he says, "I ken him nicely. Wey, I been at some ov his 'seeantics,' or whativvor it is he calls them, an' I have the makin' ov a fine 'meejum,'" he says, "for I can parsonate folks ov aal kinds, males an' females, wivoot any distinction o' s.e.xes."

'"Ay!" says I, interruptin' him wiv a sort ov admirin' surprise i' my tone o' voice, "can thoo, noo? Wey, thoo's a clivvor one, that's what thoo is."

'"Ay," says he, quite enlarged at the thought, "an' there's some folk says that I isn't quite right i' the head, but they couldn't parsonate Alexander the Great--him that the sword-dancers sing aboot--like as I can. Could they, noo?"

'"No," says I, "not they. They're not scholars enough for that, an'

mevvies they would be gliffed at it as weel. Dis thoo nivvor get a gliff at the spirits?" I axes, careless like.

'"Not while I's parsonating, I divvn't, but whiles when I's doon the pit I gets a gliff," says he; "it's sae dark an' lonesome i' places."

'"Dis Tom ivvor try to make thoo parsonate doon i' the pit?" I axes him, "for Tom, bein' stoneman, 'll come across thoo at times drivin'

yor galloway."

'"Ay, I've seen him doon below," he says, "though he nivvor talked on aboot parsonating, but usuallies pa.s.ses us by wivoot sayin' nowt, for Tom's a vary distant sort o' chap, thoo knaas."

'"But sometimes mevvies he would speak wi' thoo when he pa.s.sed thoo, an' other folks wasn't aboot? Did he ivvor talk on aboot the spirits ti thoo at all? That day the galloway ran away, did he speak wi' thoo that mornin'? Mevvies he did, laddie, an' mevvies he told thoo not ti speak aboot it lest the spirits wouldn't like it, or some such kind ov argument," says I, insinuatin' it tiv him like one o' thae lawyer chaps iv a wig.

'"Ay, he spoke tiv us that mornin', sure enough, sayin' as hoo he thought the spirits was vexed, for he had heard them callin' i' the pit itself through the darkness, an' he wanted ti knaa whether I had heard the voices same as himself or not. Well, I hadn't heard nowt, nor had nivvor thought aboot spirits bein' doon the pit, but I gets a bit gliffed myself at that, an' a bit later I ackshally heard them speakin' aloud--sure an' certain," says he.

'"Did they gliff thoo just before the galloway ran away an' ran ower poor Jack Jefferson?" says I.

'"Ay," says he, "I got a gliff then, for I heard the spirits' voices shootin'[7] oot against us."

'"Gox!" says I, "to think o' that, noo! Wey, thoo gies us a gliff an'

aal; an' what dis thoo hear them sayin'?" axes I.

'"'Here's the parsonator,' they shoots out aloud, 'that calls us frae wor rest. Lepp oot upon him, an' torment him! At him, Annexo!' or some such ootlandish name,--'at him, spirits aal!'"

'"Sae thoo starts awa' likelies wi' the galloway at a gallop, an'

couldn't get him stopped on the incline?" I axes him.

'"No, no, I was ower flay'd mysel' ti do owt; but the galloway must have gotten a gliff at something. I mind I thought I saw a flash o'

light just at the moment, an' the galloway he couldn't abide a sudden light across his eyes, he was that narvious; or mevvies it was the voice that gliffed him same as it did us; anyways, awa' aff he goes wivvoot me, an' dashes aff doon the incline wiv us chasin' him an'

shootin', 'Woa, woo-h, Paddie; woo-ah, thoo daftie!'"

'"An' hoo far behind him dis thoo think thoo was when he come to the corner where he ran inti poor Jack? Did thoo see Jack theesel', or hear him shoot out as the galloway b.u.t.ted him?"

'"No," says he, "I nivvor seen him, an' I wasn't far behind the galloway nowther, for as soon as the tub got awa' frae the lines he couldn't travel vary fast, for it was loaded. Aal I could hear was the b.u.mpity-b.u.mp o' the tub, then smash inti the wall--smash--smash--an' a crash as the tub swung ower an' dragged the galloway wiv it. I can mind nae mair nor that, mistor," says he, at the end ov his tale, "for I fell slap ower Jack Jefferson's body i' the darkness, an' pitchin'

full upon my head was knocked senseless, till they come along an'

picked us up. An' that's the whole story, Mister Carnaby," says he, "an' I've done wi' the spirits, an' parsonatin', an' aal noo, for they're treacherous things, there's nae doot aboot it," says he.

'Weel, that was aal I could get oot ov him, sae I gives him some sweeties an' lets him gan, biddin' him not let on that I'd axed him any questions, ye ken, an' efter that I lay i' bed thinkin' it aal ower an' makin' up a plan o' campaign for when "the Heckler" should be up an' aboot again.

'Efter aboot another three days I was allowed oot by the doctor wiv a sort o' lampshade ower my eyelids, an' the next day bein' "pay Sat.u.r.day," an' the pit idle, I detarmines within my ain mind ti gan doon maa lane an' hev a look round by myself; for it's no use trustin'

anyone else when ye've got a job o' that calibry iv hand, ye ken.

'I kenned where the trajiddy had taken place, o' course, sae I detarmines ti gan ti the spot an' make a sarious of obsarvations.

"First place," I says ti myself, "there winnot be much change i' the surroundin's, for it's a new drift in by there that they are drivin', wi' 'Tom the Scholar' an' his marrow, an' not many workin'; an', secondly, it's damp there wi' the salt water oozin' in through the rock, sae that footmarks will have a good chance ti stand a bit."

'Noo, "Scholar Tom" had a tarr'ble large footprint, ye ken, an' it was that I was i' search o', for I had my suspicions o' what might have happened, an' I was convinced that that d----d, mistetched beggor was at the bottom o' poor Jack Jefferson's sudden endin'--ay, an'

whenivvor I thought o' that fine, brave chap an' his bright face an'

his happiness, I says ti myself, "There'll be no rest nor pleasure nor nowt for 'the Heckler' till the mystery's discovered; an' it's yor job ti discover it," I says ti myself.

'He was bound ti have been there, for, o' course, it was him as shooted out that nonsense at Harry that had gliffed him, an' dootless it was him that had flashed his davy i' the galloway's eyes.

'Jack, d'ye see, would have been lousin' off frae his wark an' walkin'

doon the drift at that time when the galloway started off; but what beat me was that Jack couldn't hev got oot o' the way i' time, bein'

fine an' active, grand at hearin' and seein', an' ne fool forbye that.

'Noo, just when I had detarmined upon this i' maa mind a sort ov an inspiration takes us aal ov a sudden. "Wey divvn't thoo take that driver lad alang wi' thoo ti show thoo exactly where the trajiddy happened?" it says tiv us just as thoo it was a real, genu-ine voice i' my inside. "Sink me!" thinks I, "it's a tarr'ble clivvor idea, an'

sae I will."

'"Has thoo anything else ti add ti that, Inspiration?" I axes it, an'

shortlies efter it says, "Divvn't thoo trust ower much ti what Nicholson says, nor tell him o' yor plan beforehand, for he's i' Tom's power, an' tarrified ov him," it says again.

'"Gox!" thinks I, "but this is the champion; wey, I's as good a spiritualist as Tom himself."

'"There's one last question I must ax thoo," says I, for I hadn't properly thought beforehand o' the difficulty o' gannin' doon the pit on "pay-Sat.u.r.day," an' that is: "Hoo i' the warld can us gan in-bye?

for thoo kens that naebody but the furnace-man, engine-man, an'

horse-keeper gans doon that day, an' if anyone else wanted ti, wey, he would have ti get leave frae the manager, an' even then he would have ti have a deputy alang wiv him. Answer us this, Inspiration," says I, "an' it's a clagger for thoo, I's warned."

'But, mevvies efter two minutes, it whispers back two words, "drift,"

an' "beer."

'"Drift?" I repeats, an' "beer?" An' then aal at onst I sees the implication, for I kenned the lodge-keeper at the head o' the drift nicelies, an', what's mair, I kenned what Sammy Cuthbertson, the local preacher, calls "the joint iv his harness" still better.

'Sae I gans up tiv him quietly, an' I says tiv him, "Geordy," says I, "hoo much o' the best beer will five bob procure iv an emergency?"

'"Five bob," says he, vary serious, "will buy aal but two gallons o'

the best bitter, an' d---- the emergency," says he.

'"Dis thoo prefer it i' bottles, or iv a greyhen, or iv a pail--an'

aal at onst?" says I.

'"Bottles is no use," says he, "wey, the corks alone will mevvies take a pint ti theirselves. Na, na, gie it ti me iv a pail for aal-roond drinkin'."