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#3 Have a stranger watch me have s.e.x.
#4 Watch another couple #5 Have s.e.x in a cab.
#6 Go to a strip club with a guy.
#7 Use s.e.x toy #8 a.n.a.l.
#9 Have an o.r.g.a.s.m from someone's mouth.
#10 Have someone fall madly-desperately in love with me.
The slight contact of his fingers on my skin spread heat through my veins until I was gasping for breath. He entwined his fingers through mine and my heart thumped hard and fast in my chest and pulsed into each of my nerve endings, until I felt as if I were made of heat and light and sound.
He didn't speak. He stood there and stared at me with parted lips and bated breath. Slowly, he blinked and pulled me closer. He pressed his forehead to mine, fingertips reached up to hover gently over my face. His voice shook in a rough, heart-wrenching ache, "I am completely and utterly in love with you, Lexa."
His words made me tremble, tiny wracks of shivers that started somewhere deep in my chest and traveled out over every inch of my body. I loved him too.
My head stupidly nodded as the words jumbled and collided with the huge knot that seemed to lodge itself in my throat. Something weird like, "I...rov...eww," tumbled and spilled from my lips, but I knew he understood. I knew he did. His lips opened on a sigh and both his hands reached out to pull me in. He stepped into me, breathing hard, hands sliding up my throat and wrapping around my neck. I grabbed onto his arms and his muscles instantly loosened. With something that sounded like a small whimper, he pressed me into the wall and slammed his mouth hard over mine.
The kiss was frantic-our bodies shaky and uncontrollable. His hands slid up my arms and curled under the straps of my top, yanking them down to my wrists in a desperate, heady move that tugged my shirt completely off my b.r.e.a.s.t.s and made me moan out his name. He stared into my eyes and slowly ran his fingers back up the side of my arms. "Tell me again."
"I love you," I gasped.
His lips tugged up into a smile and his hands softly brushed over my uncovered b.r.e.a.s.t.s until his thumbs circled and circled over my nipples. The sensation made them ache and grow heavier.
"Tell me what you need right now, Lex."
My body trembled more and I struggled to think clearly and find my words. All I thought was please, please, please. "Everything. James...I want everything," I said as I arched my back, pushing my b.r.e.a.s.t.s closer to him.
A growl rumbled out low from deep inside his chest as he closed his lips over my right nipple and sucked hard. The feeling sliced through my middle and slammed me with heated throbs between my legs. He tugged on my nipple until it bounced out of his mouth with a loud pop then he flicked his tongue over it quickly. So fast and wild that my s.e.x clenched with every stroke.
"So all this time, I've been actually sleeping with Alex Kavon?"
"Why yes, yes you have," I laughed.
His body shifted, and suddenly there was a crinkled sheet of paper pressed into my palm.
"What's this?" I said, lifting it up.
His eyes heated. "My list of fantasies. Thought you'd like to see the things I want from you. Wrote them the first night we came back from our un-honeymoon."
He nuzzled his nose into mine and lifted up my skirt, scrunching the material up over my waist. His hands slid my panties down my thighs until they dangled from one ankle. Then he quickly unzipped his pants and pulled himself out, sliding his warm, hard length against me.
"Read my list, Lex," he said breathlessly. "Read all the things I want," he said as he slid inside me.
I moaned loudly as I felt him fill me. I couldn't concentrate on reading anything as he slowly pushed himself deep inside me.
"Read it," he whispered, stopping all movements. His forehead leaned against mine and his c.o.c.ked pulsed and throbbed inside me.
I brought the paper closer and a rush of warmth spilled out across my chest. There was only one thing neatly written across the small piece of paper.
#1 Spend the rest of my life with someone I could share all my fantasies with.
"So what do you think?" he asked as he began rocking his hips into me.
"What about California?" I asked, grinding and tightening my muscles around him.
"It's a nice place to visit. But I'm right where I want to be." His fingers lightly cupped my face. One thumb reverently traced my bottom lip. "Tell me we could turn three weeks into a lifetime. Say yes, Lex."
I reached up and touched his face. "Yes, James. I'll make all your fantasies come true."
"Thank G.o.d," he said as he leaned down and pressed his lips against mine.
Sometimes I want to get lost in words. I want to see how beautiful and brutal things are through the eyes of a poet. I love to listen to the music of the words and feel how each poet bends and manipulates my emotions. Recently I've come across such treasures and I wanted to share them with you...
In my h.e.l.l I silently scream.
This nightmare is alive, Feels like a dream.
In harmony we sing, My demons and I.
A chorus so lonesome The Angels break down and cry.
The lyrics do burn, Setting fire to my soul.
Destroying from within, Making me whole.
From ashes I came To ashes, I'll return.
But tonight I'm content To sit here and burn.
Slowly dying inside, Never felt more alive.
It's here I am home, It's here I can thrive.
Tormented and hara.s.sed, Ablaze head to toe.
The remnants of us, Love's tender throe.
The flames become embers Sparkling in the night.
Though all is consumed, No wrongs were made right.
Despair's soft, gentle breeze Soothes all the pain.
Igniting once more The furnace of shame.
Infernos of agony Bind me like chains.
Roaring out of control, Until nothing remains.
2015 C.b. Roberts Excerpt From The h.e.l.l Within Me by C.b. Roberts imprisoning me this confusion is confusing me chaos breeding insanity what is real and what is fake?
how much madness can one take?
in broad daylight, i can see the north star i look right at you, but don't know who you are i'm naming all the hairs, on the top of my head confusion ensues, because i've named them all fred i roller skate in the living room, on the carpeted floor may sound a bit eccentric, but i'm never a bore i play hopscotch on my bed, late into the night with little bo peep and rainbow brite i try to sleep, as the darkness falls but i'm still standing, against padded walls i struggle and struggle, against my restraints he'll be coming soon, and it's almost too late i gnaw at the straps, bang my head on the floor terror engulfs, as i stare at the door the locks fall away, because i held the key i've always been the one, imprisoning me 2015 Xtina Marie you- i own i'll be naughty, take me over your knee i'd like nothing more, than for you to spank me i like it mean, call me a b.i.t.c.h i'll be here, to scratch your itch tie me up, gag my lips push me down, and grab my hips from behind, take me fast hard and heavy, make it last slap my a.s.s, make me yelp there's no safe word, that will help i'm gagged and bound, on the floor don't stop now, i want more by the arm, you pull me up grab my hair, and make me suck i do exactly, what you say no more spankings, if i don't obey i want it all, inch by inch call me names, i'm your b.i.t.c.h i feel you shutter, and start to groan for the moment, you- i own.
2015 Xtina Marie.
If you want to read more of my books, below is a list of my other t.i.tles.
Fall From Grace.
Scars and Songs.
Romance Suspense Brutally Beautiful.
#TripleX (co-written with Angelisa Stone).
Here's To Falling.