Still Not Wanting to Forget Chapter 13

“I forgot,” Cheng Chen helplessly replied. “Where did the conversation stopped at?”   “…at that part about me going back to Shanghai.”   Perhaps it wasn’t where the conversation stopped, but where the action stopped?  

 He retreated, sitting on the sofa. “Why are you going back?”

  Si Nian was still deep in thought about what happened earlier. She carelessly answered, “For the script, you’re also one of the creators. If you have any problem, you can just tell me over the phone, it’s not as if you need me to change the script completely.”   While she was still talking, Cheng Chen was already pulling onto her hand with a fair amount of strength, to pull her into him.   Si Nian shot him a flabbergasted look. Cheng Chen, what are you trying to do?   “I think, it’s not good like this.”

If you want to kiss, just kiss. If you don’t want to kiss, don’t keep on groping around…   You can’t be wanting to develop an ambiguous relationship with me?   Si Nian felt her temper rising and wanted to take back her hand. But Cheng Chen’s grasp on her hand was firm. He told her, “Come here.”   “First tell me what you want to do.”   “Can’t you tell what I want to do?”   …   Cheng Chen was also frustrated enough to be rubbing his temples.   The both of them remained in that hand-tugging motion, staring at each other.   It was a sudden, mutually hostile situation…   When Si Nian was still contemplating whether to pull her hand away or continue arguing with him, he had already gave her hand a hard tug and pulled her into his arms. It was so sudden that there was no suspense at all.   Her body was forced into an awkward position, but in a moment it was enveloped in a hug…   She could feel him breathing, and as if sensing her awkward position, he quickly pulled her up to sit on his lap.   His stature was tall, her size was small. Naturally that position made it seemed like he was cradling her.   “Si Nian?”   She didn’t reply. She didn’t even dare to make a single movement.   All of her anger from earlier was gradually retreating, not even a hint of temper was left. His heartbeat also appeared to be erratic. Sensing that, Si Nian had to bite her lip lightly to prevent herself from smiling too much.   “Continue?” He lowered his head to look at her.   Si Nian pursed her lips and was silent for a long time. In the end, she stared at him and asked, “Does this mean you want us to get back together?”   With his eyebrows slightly knitted, he leaned down to whisper in her ears.  “Did we… ever agreed to break up?”   With just one play of words, without even batting an eyelid, he managed to make so many years of separation between them fade into nothingness.   She stared into his eyes, mouth slightly opened as if she wanted to say something but she couldn’t find the words. Her heartbeat was erratic and furious. She heard people walking outside the door, discussing something illegible, and remembered that the door was still unlocked. She opened her mouth wanting to remind Cheng Chen but his lips had already met hers, pulling her into a deeper kiss.   His tongue slipped in. There was a dense smell of smoke.   Si Nian frowned, she didn’t smoke. She was even somewhat allergic to smoke. When he was still in school, he never once smoked. How was it that since their reunion after so many years, his cigarette never once left his hand? How many more unfamiliar habits had he developed since those years?   “Is it that you don’t like the smell?” he asked, stopping mid-kiss.   If it wasn’t Cheng Chen.   If it wasn’t Cheng Chen, she would reject a smoking man without thought.   But yet, who was it but not Cheng Chen.   For so many years, she never once thought of anyone else romantically.   By the time he ended up carrying her to bed, both their gazes were already scalding hot.   Si Nian found some sc.r.a.ps of rationality left and quietly said, “Cheng Chen, it’s broad daylight…” He made an “oh” sound, letting her go. He left to pull the curtains shut and swiftly returned to bed. She desperately held onto the quilt, keeping herself bundled up and refusing to let him open up the quilt.   The room was dark, there was barely any light at all. But his eyes were bright as he quietly stared at Si Nian whose face was flushed red.   Si Nian could barely breathe under his intense gaze, hands tugging at the quilt. She desperately tried to reason with him, to not rush into things. “Isn’t there a lot of people waiting for you…”   He looked at his watch. “Not urgent.”   He took the watch off, and then reached to untie her.   “Back then when I couldn’t find you,” he said, staring at her, “I was very upset. You like to sulk so I thought you would just disappear for a few days to make me anxious. I didn’t expect that I wouldn’t be able to find you for an entire month.”   Si Nian pursed her lips, her heart heavy with regret.   “I wanted to get drunk to forget you but unluckily the beer that I bought was fake. Thankfully someone discovered me and sent me to the hospital. It was a very difficult time for me, I ended up repeating the school year.”   He lifted the quilt and reached for her, pulling her into his embrace. His lips curved into a smile, silently laughing for a moment. “Say, I’m already almost thirty, why is that every time I’m in front of you, I can still remember my teen years that vividly?”   “What happened next?” she asked. Even though it was obviously in the past, she still felt anxious for him.   For so many years since their separation, it was just an endless stretch of blankness. She knew about him when he finally gained some fame, she read those routine interviews about him. But he never once mentioned his school days, as if it was a great taboo.   “Next?” He sounded as if he was reminiscing.   Next, there was no next.   There was only a kiss that started everything.   She closed her eyes tightly, allowing him to do as he pleased, but in the end she could no longer bear it. Her eyes were wet from tears, she finally opened them to say, “I can’t, it hurts…”   …   “Try again?”   …   “No, no, I can’t, it hurts so bad…”   Si Nian’s tears began to overflow.   Cheng Chen no longer dared to give it another try and used his fingers to wipe away her tears. The tears were too much that he ended up using a napkin. Si Nian bit on his arm with vengeance. Only after she was satisfied, she asked, “Do you even know how to do this?”   …   “Theoretically I’m very experienced,” Cheng Chen said, hands still busy with wiping away her tears, “I directed some bed scenes before…”   Her eyes opened wide, heart beating wildly. “For so many years, you never had a girlfriend?”   Cheng Chen let out a sigh. “If I really did have one, would you still be here?”   She suddenly became quiet. “Not even friends with benefits?”   …   Only after he wiped the remaining last tear, she wriggled under the quilt, hugging his waist tightly. His body was scalding hot to the touch. A sudden urge to tease him came up, so she said, “Director Cheng, how pitiful you are, being a virgin for so many years…”   Before she could finish her teasing, Cheng Chen had already pulled her under the quilt. “I take that you’re no longer in pain?”   “Pain…”   By the time they were having dinner, her eyes were still swollen. Now and then she would glare at Cheng Chen with resentment.   The seating arrangement was troublesome. She was sitting on Cheng Chen’s right, another producer was supposed to be sitting on his left. But Tong Jia managed to steal that spot. From the moment she sat down, she quickly found a serious topic to seek guidance from Cheng Chen. When she was laughing, she would even shoot Si Nian a meaningful glance.   When the ‘Big Plate’ Chicken dish was served, Cheng Chen first gave Si Nian some. Si Nian fiddled with the piece of chicken with her chopsticks. “There’s skin.”   Cheng Chen picked up that piece of chicken into his own bowl. After skinning it, only did he returned the piece to her. She ate a bite of it then put it down. “Too much fat.”   He quietly placed a slice of potato in her bowl.   “Too greasy.”   Cheng Chen didn’t say a single word. He placed some of the Xinjiang’s popular spicy cabbage dish into her bowl.   Tong Jia was the kind of person who would put in the more effort when there were obstacles. She smiled at Si Nian and said, “Scriptwriter, is it that you’re not used to Xinjiang’s taste? The ‘Big Plate’ Chicken tastes exactly like that, once you get used to it, you’ll find it very flavourful.”   “It’s so-so,” Si Nian replied. She ate some of her rice, then looked at Cheng Chen. “Do you like Xinjiang’s taste?”   “I don’t like it,” Cheng Chen said. Pausing for a moment, he added, “I really don’t like it.”   Shen Zhe, who was drinking beer, couldn’t stop himself spitting from laughter.   Even when they left the restaurant and had gone inside the elevator, he was still laughing. He patted Cheng Chen’s shoulder and said, “Director Cheng, I can’t sleep. Why don’t I go to your room tonight and we’ll have a long talk?”   Cheng Chen pressed the b.u.t.ton for third floor. “Tonight I’m having someone over.”   …   The entire elevator was quiet. Tong Jia who had been noisily chattering the entire night finally closed her mouth. When the elevator stopped at the third floor, there was a ding sound. Everyone watched as Cheng Chen walked out.   He then turned around. “Si Nian?”