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Somewhere in the peak of Badril Mountain.
A slow-paced guitar tune was heard.
Wall of runes was placed all over the place. The peak actually was off limits for any living being. Strange objects and instruments that shouldn’t appear in this current era of technologies were laid here carelessly like a bunch of garbages. There were animated paper cranes that flew around the peak, served as patrols for the master of the place, which normal people couldn’t see with naked eyes. On a big throne-like chair, a spirit was lying lazily while played his wooden guitar.
“Gyl, you there?” a high-quality transmitted sound popped out from a magical object nearby. The owner of the voice sounded feminine.
The spirit stopped his guitar playing. “Call me Good-Natured Spirit, tranny. What do you want?”
“Big news. Jhuju was killed by Nura Gilmour.”
Good-Natured Spirit snorted. “Haahh! That stupid fool finally learned his lesson.”
“You're still angry because he poisoned his own body before you tried to possess him?” the feminine voice laughed.
“No matter. There’s still a little piece of s.h.i.t on Yashura Family who had a little bit of talent for ‘Water Flowing Style’.”
“If you want a compatible body for ‘Water Flowing Style’ why did you not possessed Lharu Yashura? He’s the most talented man in his generation back then.”
“Because he’s too f.u.c.kin’ ugly,” the spirit grumbled. “I have a standard too, you know. Don’t talk about that old fart again to me.”
The feminine voice laughed again with a pleasant bell-like sound. One who only heard to voice might fantasize a young, shy, and pretty maiden’s laughter, when in fact, it’s a male’s voice.
After that, the transmitted voice reported a lot of news from all around Tiramikal Continent. Even politics maneuver and economic development of other six big continents were told in detail. Good-Natured Spirit was listening with a serious face. And when the report was finished, the spirit received a single piece of golden paper.
“Seems agriculture in this and that kingdom were f.u.c.ked up. Their biggest alchemist guild still on some s.h.i.tty scandals too. d.a.m.n. I need to start investing in another product,” the spirit muttered after he read the golden paper.
“Ah, that reminds me. Your steam technology was booming in the neighbor continent. A lot of factions tried to steal the blueprint,” said the feminine voice.
“What? Which motherf.u.c.kers decided to f.u.c.k with me? I’ll ma.s.sacre their entire clan! I’ll p.i.s.s on their ancestors’ grave!” the spirit growled. Then he suddenly remembered something, and could only scratch his head. “Oh well, my schedules are actually packed. Those lucky b.a.s.t.a.r.ds. I’ll kill them all if I have some spare time later…”
The feminine voice was laughing again.
“Anyway, how is your progress on that Yashura child?”
“Horrible,” the spirit grudgingly played sharp guitar tones. “That stupid piece of s.h.i.t never showing any desire to improve himself.”
“Maybe your method too harsh.”
Good-Natured Spirit shook his head. “The problem is he’s a f.u.c.kin’ airhead. I hate those kinds of people. Never know what they are thinking.”
“Hihihi. Don’t forget, you only have five years more until the next leader candidates voting. You might have been a bigshot in the past, but today lots of talented young men sprouted out of nowhere. For example, well, look at Nura’s faction! If only you knew how much he had the ambition for the leader’s throne… oh my! Not to mention candidates from other continents, what I heard they were fierce like you. Be careful.”
“Pfft! Bunch of brats, sooner or later I’ll kick their a.s.ses back to their mommy and daddy.”
After the spirit and the voice chatted a bit, later, a purple paper crane descended towards the Good-Natured Spirit. Both of them suddenly stopped talking as the spirit received a dozen pieces of black paper.
“The chatting scene is over. Ladies and gentlemen, some slapstick comedy for your enjoyment, here comes!” Good-Natured Spirit grinned as he waved the pieces of black papers in front of him. “I present you… Shira Chaplin! Or should he be Shira Keaton?”
Pieces of black papers were merging, formed a wide black screen in front of the spirit. Not long after that, the black papers greedily absorbed light from the sun, reflecting them back with awkwardly fast-paced, black-and-white motion picture.
It was a silent film. t.i.tled: “The s.h.i.tty Romance Adventure of Shira Yashura.”
The Good-Natured Spirit do a cheerful background music with his guitar.
The first scene was, Shira felt sad from the lonely from his solitude on the hill behind Yashura Family residence.
Then, a letter came.
The young Shira smiled, however, there’s an error in the background shown that he was inside a library.
t.i.tle card: “Oh, my first love. After many lonely years pa.s.sed, you finally remember this humble lover and came to visit this tiring, despair heart!”
The camera was panning an excited Shira who ran across Yashura Family yard.
The frame actually showed a girl with a broom was chasing after the running Shira in the background. But that was only for a split second, no problem to the bigger picture at all.
The next shot was a luxurious carriage that stopped at the front of Yashura Family’s gate.
For three seconds, the scene showed a young elegant-clothed man helped a beautiful yet cold girl from the carriage.
The shot was cut to the talked Shira, t.i.tle card: “My love!”
After that, the cold girl replied, t.i.tle card: “I’m sorry, Shira. Let’s break up. We can’t be together anymore!”
Shira Yashura in a different background, blinked his eyes in confusion, t.i.tle card: “Why?”
The cold girl hesitated for a moment before she replied again. t.i.tle card: “Because… I already married with… a bunch of middle-aged dudes.”
The scene was cut to Badril Village festival a few months ago, where a bunch middle-aged men were holding hand and happily dancing in unison.
Then the cold girl said again, t.i.tle card: “And now I have little kids too.”
The scene was cut to a dozen of children of Badril Village played around the street.
Finally, the cold girl closed, t.i.tle card: “Don’t ever dream of me again.”
Good-Natured Spirit tried with full-effort to hold his own laughter and changed his guitar playing tune into a sad tragic one.
Shira Yashura, in next scene, was frustrated. He ran swiftly across the forest. However, he didn’t show his face to the camera, probably due to shame. t.i.tle card: “NOOOOOOOO!!!!”
The shot after that was where he slept in his own tent on mountain woods.
t.i.tle card: “Oh, how cruel the world was. Will I ever find my own true love?”
Suddenly, the background music changed again to an inspiring and uplifting tone.
Shira walked across a field of flowers.
In this scene, he finally found a true love that he overlooked before.
The youth in love approached. t.i.tle card: “Oh sweet maiden of destiny! How foolish for I not putting my whole heart after all the time you were waiting for me!”
The next shot; a gorilla stopped at whatever it was doing, which was nothing, and slowly turned its hideous huge head….
And the gorilla said, t.i.tle card: “You finally notice me, senpai!!! Let’s get married!”
Shira, inside a library background, calmly nodded. t.i.tle card: “Okay. Let’s get married.”
Final t.i.tle card: “And in the end, Shira and Gorilla live happily ever after.”
Fin.
The Good-Natured Spirit laughed out loud while he literally rolled on the floor.
After he calmed down, the spirit patted the purple paper crane’s head beside him. “Oh, my cute paper crane friend. Well done! You really made me miss my old world now!”
“Oh! Sounds fun!” the feminine voice commented, as he really couldn’t see the fun silent film that Good-Natured Spirit watched before.
The film screen became pieces of black papers again, instantly flew toward the Good-Natured Spirit.
“I’ll make sure that d.a.m.n lazy brat will watch this after the final cut!” the spirit said enthusiastically. “Oh, there’s actually a sequel? d.a.m.n, is it a Valentine’s Day Special or something?!”
Good-Natured Spirit didn’t hesitate to play the second film.
It was t.i.tled: “The s.h.i.tty Romance Adventure of Shira Yashura 2: My Harem Went Wrong”
The first scene. Shira Yashura and his wife gorilla fought a brutal battle.
The gorilla was furious, threw trees around to vent its anger. t.i.tle card: “You s.h.i.tty husband! You don’t care for me and our child in my stomach anymore!”
Shira tried to argue, shown from inside Yashura Family’s library. t.i.tle card: “That’s not true! My loves are eternal!”
The gorilla went mad hearing his reply. t.i.tle card: “Loves? Plural love? How many women are there actually in your harem?! I’m your first true love, dammit!”
Suddenly, the shot was cut to a barked dog. t.i.tle card: “How shameless! You two were married when I was pregnant by my handsome secret boyfriend Shira! I’m his true love!!!”
Then the shot was cut to a moo-ed cow. t.i.tle card: “I’m already milking two Young Master’s children when you s.h.i.tty women are still virgins. Dream on!”
However, the scene was cut again. A random angry horse that was shown neighing hard. t.i.tle card: “Gurlz pls. I ma da legendary long-lost childhood friend! You three b.i.t.c.hes better dream to become mah Shira’s first true lovah!”
Good-Natured Spirit rolled on the floor again, couldn’t even hold his loud laughter.
The climax!
Shira was judged because of his poor management of his own harem.
The scene was; the panic Shira gripped hard inside a big, golden fur elite gorilla’s hand.
The elite golden fur gorilla said, t.i.tle card: “Any last word?”
Shira, in the gorilla’s grip, t.i.tle card: “…”
Then, the elite gorilla warned him by uttering a serious life lesson, t.i.tle card: “In the next life, you better think twice before you do polygamy.”
After that, the elite gorilla threw Shira into the air.
The thrown Shira was crashed hard on the ground.
Yet, with broken bones, Shira managed to stand up again. His face was ferocious. t.i.tle card: “f.u.c.k.”
He picked his short sword that laid on the ground. With a stumbled steps, he charged toward the elite gorilla!
Good-Natured Spirit was amused by Shira’s bravery and stupidity. He knew the last moment was actually what happened in the real life. After he was thrown, Shira lost his mind, and actually dared to fight an Elite Monster head on!
Naturally, the good guy Good-Natured Spirit helped his young friend by playing a thrilling, full of energy guitar background music.
He called the background music with t.i.tle “Training of h.e.l.l”.
He expected the Elite Monster to beat the s.h.i.t out of Shira this day. That will be a hard lesson for the lazy b.u.m.
And in the scene, the elite gorilla howled. Charged toward the youth too.
Shira slowly walked with his sword.
They clashed…
Tuuiiinnnnggg!
Good-Natured Spirit’s guitar strings suddenly snapped. He flabbergasted.
What happened in the scene was different from what he thought before. It was a horrific scene, full of blood.
There, Shira Yashura stood alone with his sword. On the ground, the elite gorilla lied lifeless with his stomach guts were spread all over the place.
The silent camera observed the close-up of Shira Yashura’s face.
His eyes were bleak, dark-colored eyeb.a.l.l.s that had no pupils. One glanced and one would know that he wasn’t Shira Yashura from before.
Then, with an audible, deep, and hoa.r.s.e voice, the bleak dark-colored eyes Shira Yashura said something toward the camera:
“The mountain, the sea, and the sky await!”