Social Life Part 71

Gentlemen are denied this privilege and a lady avails herself of it with discretion, selecting a favorite odor and adhering closely to it, so that correspondents could tell her missives with closed eyes, by their very fragrance.

Where black-edged paper and envelopes are used by persons in mourning, the width of the black border varies according to the nearness of the deceased relative or the length of time since the loss, though some never use more than the narrowest line of black, while others still, with the most perfect propriety, discard it altogether. Its use is a matter of taste simply, and must cease so soon as the mourning garb is dropped. Never be guilty, however, of writing a letter of congratulation on black-edged paper, even if in mourning; use plain white for this purpose. At the same time, it is never necessary to write a letter of condolence on black-bordered paper, unless the writer himself is in mourning.

[Ill.u.s.tration: IMPROPER POSITION. PROPER POSITION.]

The careful writing of a note or letter is a mark of respect to the recipient, and blots, erasures and mended words should never be permitted to disfigure it. Erasing cannot be done without marring the entire page and a mended or rewritten word is an offense to the eye.

To copy the letter afresh is the only real remedy, and those who value their own standing will not grudge the pains spent in the composition of a letter that shall be a credit to the writer and a pleasure to the receiver.

This comes under the general recommendation of doing everything you do as it ought to be done. There should be no slipshod way of writing a letter by which you are to be judged.

Figures and abbreviations are often used. Few numerals are allowable, except the dates, the street number and the hour of the day. Very large sums of money are also stated in figures unless they begin a sentence, when all numbers must be written out fully. Figures are also preferable in uneven sums of money too long to be written with one, or at most two words; per cent., as well, is rulable in figures. Degrees should be either written "75," or "seventy-five degrees." Fractions, given alone, should be in words, and all other numerals occurring in a letter must follow the same rule, except quotations from stock and market reports. For extra precaution, sometimes sums of money are written, followed by figures representing the same, in parenthesis.

Common Abbreviations.

Abbreviations proper to social and formal letter-writing are few in number. Honorary t.i.tles, such as Dr., Prof., Hon., Rev., Messrs., Esq., Capt., etc., are usually abbreviated as above, though very good authorities advocate, and with much reason, the use of the full word "Reverend," as also the t.i.tles "Honorable" and "Professor." The scholastic t.i.tles are also abbreviated by the proper initials, as A.M., M.D., LL.D., following the name. The names of months, of states, the words "County" and "Post Office," when used on the superscription are also abbreviated.

The use of A.M., M., P.M., to mark the divisions of the day, technical abbreviations, and the usual e.g., i.e., viz., etc., are too familiar to the users to need mention. Further than the above, brevity is _not_ always the soul of wit.

The letter itself, as a whole, is now to be considered, and to facilitate its writing there should be some one corner in every home devoted to this purpose. The incentive to letter-writing is always damped, the happy thought we would send our friend takes flight, if we must find the pens upstairs, the paper down, the ink bottle in the pantry, empty or not, as the case may be, and our patience wherever it may be after the search is ended.

[Ill.u.s.tration: A Sc.r.a.p OF A LETTER.]

Letters would be more frequently written, more punctually answered, and half the unreasonable dread of writing done away with, were this matter attended to properly. Let the writing desk stand in some well-lighted corner of sitting, dining, or "mother's" room, and let it be stored with all articles necessary to the exigencies of correspondence. Should the desk prove beyond the depth of the family purse, then let its subst.i.tute be found in a firm, good-sized table or stand, with a drawer where necessary supplies may be kept. Two or more sizes of note paper, unruled, with envelopes to match, for the elders of the household; writing tablets and commercial note, together with plain envelopes, for the school-children and everyday uses; a good dictionary, a tray with pen rack and inkstand thereon, and a goodly supply of pens, will complete a corner that will do more toward the family education in good breeding and culture than any other expenditure that can be made, and will render letter-writing the pleasure it should be, instead of the dread it too often is.

If one possesses a permanent address, street, number and city may, with great propriety, be engraved on the paper at the top of the sheet. If this is not done the address should always be written clearly on all letters. It is too much to expect one's friends to remember the private addresses of all their correspondents, and time is too precious to be spent searching out some missing letter in quest of street or number, in default of which more than one letter has gone unanswered.

The date of a letter, month, day, year and city is first in place.

This should be written on one line, beginning, according to length, more or less near the center of the sheet and ending at the right-hand margin. In business letters, unless the printed letter head fixes the place, this line should not be more than one-quarter down the page; while in social or formal letters it should be one-third the distance down. If it should be desirable to give the county also, the date may be allowed to occupy two or more lines, as follows:

MENDOTA, LA SALLE CO., ILL., May 29, 189-.

In the same manner a city number and address may be given:

309 POST STREET, OTTAWA, ILL., January 30, 189-.

In writing from hotels, the following form should be adopted:

THE ARLINGTON, BINGHAMTON, N.Y., October 3, 189-.

Some, in polite letter-writing, prefer to give the address at the conclusion rather than the beginning of the letter. Under these circ.u.mstances the prescribed form would be:

Truly your friend, MARY N. PRESCOTT.

FRANKLIN GROVE, Lee Co., Ill., January 14, 189-.

There are several ways of writing the figures that compose the date of a letter. Many business men and others use this form, 1-2-189-, or, 1/2/9-, for January 2, 189-. Others still would write as follows: Jan.

2nd, 1896. Taste and habit will decide the matter for each. To give the name instead of the number of the month is, perhaps, more elegant.

The address, supposing it to be a business letter would come next in order, beginning at the left-hand margin, and our letter would stand thus:

TIPTON, IOWA, April 1, 189-.

MR. WILLIAM H. HILL, 307 Wall Street, New York.

The salutation is a matter wherein there is great lat.i.tude of usage.

In conformity with custom, some t.i.tle is to be used in addressing correspondents, and this t.i.tle differs greatly in accordance with the degree of acquaintance, or friendship, with the party addressed. It should always begin at the left of the page. In the business letter just above, the form might be as follows:

TIPTON, IOWA, April 1, 189-.

MR. WILLIAM H. HILL, 307 Wall Street, New York.

DEAR SIR: (or, SIR:)

Or, if there should be a firm name, the address would be as follows:

Messrs. WILLIAMS & HILL, 307 Wall Street, New York.

DEAR SIRS: (or, SIRS:) (or, GENTLEMEN:)

Again, if wished, the salutation might be omitted and the address made to serve as t.i.tle. Another form is this:

MR. WILLIAM H. HILL, 307 Wall Street, New York. MR. HILL:

The following form, though causing an unpleasant repet.i.tion of the name, is often adopted in business letters to unmarried ladies, probably to escape the problem that the choice of Miss or Madam offers to so many:

305 BEACON STREET, BOSTON, Ma.s.s., February 10, 189-.

MISS MARY WRIGHT, Cherry Valley, Ill. MISS WRIGHT:

Or, omitting the name, the simple address may be used. However, there need not be the slightest difficulty in addressing an unmarried lady, even should she be in her teens, as "Madam," or "Dear Madam," it being a general term as applicable to women without regard to age or condition, as "Sir" is to their brethren. This will be easily seen when it is recollected that it is a derivation from _ma dame_, my lady, and since our language is deficient in any equivalent term to the pretty French _Mademoiselle_, or the German, _Fraulein_, and, as "Dear Miss" is obsolete, we must be content to utilize "Madam" on all necessary occasions. There is another form much used where the address is omitted:

305 MICHIGAN AVENUE, CHICAGO, July 10, 189-.

MISS HALSTEAD. DEAR MADAM:

Or, if on friendly footing, simply: DEAR MISS HALSTEAD:

If two young ladies are to be addressed, the term "Misses" should be used, as:

HAVANA, ILL., February 20, 189-.

MISSES TAYLOR & WATSON, Stenographers, 159 Church Street, Rockford, Ill. MESDAMES:

The "Mesdames" may be omitted and the address used alone, but its addition indicates more polish. The translation is "My Ladies." Some subst.i.tute for it, simply "Ladies," which is quite proper.

The prefix "Dear" may be omitted wherever desirable, but never write "_My_ dear Miss Halstead," "_My_ dear Madam," or "_My_ dear Sir,"

unless intimately acquainted.