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They stayed in the foyer while the Administrator hurried off, and presently they heard footsteps approaching. Eachan Meritorious entered, and he looked mildly surprised when he laid eyes on Ghastly.
"Mr. Bespoke," he said, coming forward. "Will wonders never cease?"
"Grand Mage," Ghastly said as they shook hands. "You've already met Valkyrie Cain, I think."
"So you chose a name after all," Meritorious said with a slightly disapproving look. "I hope your Mr. Pleasant knows what he's doing."
237.
"Skulduggery's been captured," Stephanie blurted. "Serpine has him."
"Not this again."
"It's true," Ghastly said.
Meritorious peered at him. "You saw it yourself?"
"Well," Ghastly said, hesitating, "no, but--"
Meritorious waved his hand. "Skulduggery Pleasant is an excellent detective, and we value his help and his expertise on many difficult cases. But when it comes to Nefarian Serpine, he does not have his usual detached perspective."
"Serpine has captured him!" Stephanie insisted.
"My dear, I like you. And I can see why Skulduggery likes you. You are a frighteningly upfront person, and these are qualities to be admired. However, you are new to our culture, and our ways, and you have heard a decidedly skewed version of our history. Serpine is not the villain he once was."
"I was there," Stephanie said, struggling to remain calm. "Serpine came with his paper creatures and they took him."
This made Meritorious pause. "Paper creatures?"
"Well, it looked like they were made out of paper."
238.
He nodded slowly. "Hollow Men. Minions of Serpine. Terrible things, bloated by stink and evil."
"Now do you believe me? We need to get him back."
"Grand Mage," Ghastly said, "my friend is in danger. I know you don't want it to be true, but the Truce has been broken. Serpine and the sorcerers allied with him will waste no time in seizing power. The Elders must act now."
"On what authority?" Meritorious asked. "On the word of a girl I barely know?"
"I'm not lying," said Stephanie.
"But you may be mistaken."
"I'm not. Serpine wants the Scepter, and he thinks Skulduggery can get it for him."
"The Scepter is a fairy tale--"
"The Scepter is real," Stephanie said, cutting him off. "It's real enough that Serpine is after it, and he killed the two men you had spying on him so that you wouldn't find out about it until it was too late."
Meritorious hesitated for a moment. "Miss Cain, if you're wrong, and we move against Serpine now, then we are starting a war we are not ready for."
239.
"I'm sorry," Stephanie said, seeing the trepidation in the Elder's eyes and speaking softly now. "But the war has already started."
The paper clip lay on the tabletop and didn't move. Stephanie focused, flexed her fingers, and then thrust her palm toward it, trying to genuinely believe that thin air was nothing more than interlocking objects. The paper clip still didn't move. She nudged it, just to make sure it wasn't stuck or anything. Ghastly entered the room.
"We're ready to go," he said. "You're sure you want to do this?"
"Very sure." She put the paper clip into her pocket and nodded toward the door behind him. "Is there an army out there?"
"Uh, not quite."
"How many?"
He hesitated. "Two."
"Two? He has an army of Cleavers and he gives us two?"
"Sending any more would arouse suspicion," Ghastly said. "Meritorious needs a little time to contact Morwenna Crow and Sagacious Tome and convince them that action is 240.
necessary, and until he does, this rescue mission is strictly unofficial."
"Please tell me they're as good as Skulduggery said they are?"
"Both their uniforms and their scythes can ward off the majority of magical attacks, and there aren't many deadlier in close combat."
"Close combat?" she said with a frown. "What about throwing fireb.a.l.l.s and stuff? Are they Elementals or Adepts?"
Ghastly cleared his throat. "Neither, actually. Magic corrupts certain people, and Cleavers need to be seen as completely impartial, so . . ."
"So they're not magic? At all?"
"They have some magic, but it just adds to their combat abilities. They're quite strong, and very fast."
"So what are they going to do? Run around Serpine until he gets dizzy and falls over?"
"If it all goes according to plan, Serpine won't even know we're there."
"And what are the chances of that happening?"
He looked at her, and for a moment he held his ground. Then he looked away. "They're not great," he admitted.
"Exactly."
241.
He looked up again. "But Mr. Bliss has offered us his help."
"He's coming?" Stephanie asked, unsure. She didn't like the idea of going anywhere with Mr. Bliss.
"Not him," Ghastly said, "but he's sending someone. Five is a good number; we can sneak in, grab Skulduggery, sneak out. Simple."
The door opened behind them and Meritorious was there. "I have arranged your transport," he said.
They followed him up out of the Sanctuary and exited the Waxworks Museum from the back, where a large van was parked. As soon as Meritorious emerged into the sunlight, two Cleavers walked forward. They took the scythes from their sheathes before they climbed in. Stephanie hoped the van didn't go over any potholes, or she'd be skewered before they even reached Serpine's castle.
Another person walked forward, a person she recognized from the library.
"Tanith Low," Meritorious said, "this is Ghastly Bespoke and Valkyrie Cain."
242.
"We've met," Tanith said, giving Stephanie a polite nod. She carried a sword in a black scabbard, its lacquered surface crisscrossed with nicks and marks.
"Mr. Bliss sent you?" Ghastly asked.
"He did. He thought I could be of use."
"That's quite a recommendation."
"He just wants this business to be over with as soon as possible," Tanith said. "I'm at your disposal for the duration."
"Then let's go."
Tanith climbed into the van, and Ghastly got behind the wheel.
"Good luck," Meritorious said to Stephanie as she was about to join them.
"Thank you."
He shrugged. "You'll need it."
243.
Chapter Seventeen.
A Fabulous Rescue Indeed
THE RESCUE team stood by the side of the road and looked up at the wall surrounding Serpine's land. It was maybe three times as tall as Stephanie. Beyond it lay woodland, and beyond that the castle.
It occurred to Stephanie that if they didn't get Skulduggery back, it was all over. Serpine would get the Scepter, and the Faceless Ones would return. The fate of the entire planet rested on the shoulders of a skeleton, and on the five people sent to rescue him.
244.
"What if we do go up against Serpine?" Stephanie asked, fighting to keep the dread out of her voice. She had to remain strong. She couldn't let them see that she was just an ordinary twelve-year-old. "What if we can't just get in and get out without anyone noticing? Do we have a plan if we have to face him?"
"Oh," Ghastly said, considering it. "No, not really."
"I'm going to try and cut him with my sword," Tanith said helpfully.
"Right," Stephanie said. "Excellent. What about guards? Do you think they'll be expecting us?"
"Serpine is used to the Elders taking forever to make their calm, thought-out decisions," Tanith said. "So he won't be expecting anything as amazingly rash and reckless as this."
Ghastly nodded. "That'll teach him to underestimate stupid people."
"All right then," Stephanie said. "Just wanted to make sure we'd thought of everything. So let's go."
Without a word, the Cleavers ran forward and jumped, legs tucked beneath them, cleared the top of the wall, and disappeared from view.
245.
"Show-offs," Ghastly muttered, sweeping both hands down by his sides. A gust of wind lifted him and swung him up toward the wall, where he grabbed on and pulled himself to the top. Tanith turned to Stephanie.
"Want a boost?"
"If you wouldn't mind."
Tanith crouched, interlocking her fingers, and Stephanie put one foot into her hands. On the count of three, Stephanie shot upward. Tanith was strong, stronger than she looked--Stephanie had no trouble catching the edge of the wall. Ghastly helped her up, dropped down the other side, and turned to wait for her. She let herself hang down, then released her grip, and her boots crunched onto dried leaves and brittle twigs. A moment later Tanith landed beside her.
The woodland was thick, and as they moved deeper into it, it became darker. The sun had difficulty filtering through the tall trees, and it was cold enough to make Stephanie grateful for her coat. The Cleavers didn't make a sound as they walked. The woodland was quiet--quieter than it had any right to be. No birds sang. Nothing rustled in the undergrowth. It gave her an eerie sensation.
246.
They reached the line of trees at the rear of the castle and ducked down. A small army of Hollow Men patrolled the grounds.
"Oh joy," Ghastly said grimly. "How are we going to get by them?"
"We need a diversion," Tanith said.
"Any suggestions?"
Tanith didn't answer, but after a moment she looked at the Cleavers. Ghastly understood immediately.
"But there are too many," he protested.
Tanith's tone was flat but firm. "We don't have a choice."
The Cleavers tilted their heads toward her, and after a moment they nodded. They stole back among the trees and were gone.