Shinrei Tantei Yakumo – SECRET FILES: Kizuna Vol 1 Chapter 2

SECRET FILES – KIZUNA 
each wish: chapter 2

–

1

After hearing this much, Haruka let out a deep sigh.

She had visited Isshin to hear about somebody Yak.u.mo couldn’t forget, thinking it would be a short story about his first love or something.

However, now that even Gotou had shown up, the story had taken a turn she hadn’t expected.

More than anything, she was surprised about the difference in Yak.u.mo’s personality now.

Though Yak.u.mo was curt, he wouldn’t go so far as to reject other people.

As well, though he didn’t think fondly of his red left eye and his physical ability to see the spirits of the dead, she felt like he recognised that it was something he could not change.

However, the Yak.u.mo of the past was different –

‘You’re surprised,’ said Isshin, looking at Haruka after talking so far.

'Just a bit,’ replied Haruka while looking down.

If I met Yak.u.mo in the past, what would I have thought?

That question suddenly came to her. The answer – she didn’t want to think about it.

'It’d be a problem if you’re troubled here. The incident’s just started.’

Gotou laughed, his eyes glittering.

'This isn’t a funny story,’ Isshin said reprovingly.

'My bad. That’s right.’

Gotou accepted his fault honestly, which was unusual.

Haruka felt like the atmosphere had become suddenly heavier.

'Let’s take a short break. The tea’s cold too.’

Isshin said that, clearing the stagnant air, and placed the teacups on the tray, leaving the living room.

'Yak.u.mo really had scary eyes back then,’ Gotou said suddenly.

He was playing with his cigarette case as he narrowed his eyes, as if looking into the distance.

'Scary eyes?’

'Yeah. It was like he hated everything in the word.’

'I feel like I can imagine it, and I feel like I can’t…’

Yak.u.mo’s head came up in Haruka’s mind.

With his always sleepy eyes, he was running a hand through his messy hair.

He was curt and unfriendly, and everything he said and did was laced with sarcasm. Though he didn’t show it on the surface, he had both a strong will and kindness to him.

When Haruka was in danger, he would always come to save her, risking himself without any hesitation.

That was the Yak.u.mo Haruka knew.

However, it was true that Yak.u.mo’s eyes were sometimes incredibly frightening.

However, Haruka felt like the emotion in those eyes was anger towards evil.

It wasn’t hatred towards others.

'He changed because of that incident, but it’s not like he became somebody completely different. Just an extension of the same person.’

Haruka understood what Gotou was saying, but she still felt like there was something fundamentally different.

'Sorry for the wait.’

Isshin came back with tea.

'You’re late. Did you go to pick the tea leaves?’ Gotou complained irrationally.

'What a short-tempered man,’ said Isshin, sounding exasperated as he put the teacups in front of each of htem.

'Now, where did I talk up to?’

Isshin rubbed his hands together.

'Just as Yak.u.mo-kun was setting out to investigate the incident.’

'Ah, that’s right,’ replied Isshin, hitting his thigh. 'The next day…’

'You’re getting the order wrong!’ interrupted Gotou.

'Am I?’

'You are. My bit comes first. Otherwise it won’t connect.’

Gotou crossed his arms indignantly.

'Do what you want.’

At Isshin’s words, Gotou nodded in satisfaction before beginning.

'After nearly being burnt up, I…’

2

– Everything burned.

Gotou put his jacket with the burnt sleeve over his shoulders as he looked at the burnt remains in a daze.

Though the firefighters came right afterwards, the fire was so strong that all they could do was stop the fire from spreading to the surrounding buildings.

All that was left was a wall and a few poles – everything else had collapsed.

It was like there had been an air raid or something.

Under the lights that had been brought onto the hospital premises, people from forensics in blue uniforms were crawling about like wild dogs searching for food.

Gotou admired their persistence, but in this situation, they probably couldn’t hope for any useful evidence.

'What a mess,’ grumbled Miyagawa, holding a can of coffee out towards Gotou.

'It really was. I was almost burnt myself.’

Gotou opened the can of coffee and drank it all at once.

The caffeine went straight to his stomach.

Shimomura wasn’t found from the burnt remains. He probably used the confusion to get away.

Gotou felt frustration rise up from his stomach. Shimomura had been right there. It was pathetic of him to let him get away.

'It isn’t your fault he got away.’

Miyagawa hit Gotou’s shoulders, like he’d sensed how he felt. 

With Gotou’s personality, he’d rather get hit with a fist at times like this. Being comforted just made him feel more pathetic.

'I definitely won’t let him get away the next time I see him.’

Gotou lit a cigarette.

He felt like the smoke was more painful than usual.

'Don’t get so worked up. You’ll start burning again.’

Miyagawa told a terrible joke while smirking. His humour sense was already that of an old man’s.

'Gotou. Got some time?’

The one who interrupted was Matsumura, an examiner from forensics who was in the same cla.s.s as Gotou.

The man’s face and even body were like that of a horse – there was something unrefined about him.

'What?’

'There’s something I want you to look at.’

Matsumura was mumbling like there was something in his mouth.

'Got a hold of something that proves the wife’s cheating or something?’

'That’s not it. Just come.’

Matsumura lightly let Gotou’s joke slide and walked away briskly.

– What an irritating guy.

Gotou grumbled that inwardly and followed Matsumura with Miyagawa.

They went through the pa.s.sage soaked with hose water to the back of the hospital.

The persimmon tree in the backyard was lit up.

There were two examiners there with shovels around the tree.

At their feet, there was a mountain of dirt. Beside it was a hole about a metre in diameter.

'Found treasure or something?’

Gotou called out to Matsumura’s back.

Matsumura stopped at the hole and glared at Gotou after sighing.

'Decide for yourself if it’s treasure.’

Gotou was irritated by Matsumura’s unfriendly words. He pushed aside one of the examiners and looked into the hole.

It was about as deep as a person.

He saw something like white b.a.l.l.s at the bottom of the hole.

No, that wasn’t it. They weren’t b.a.l.l.s. They were –

'Skulls?’ said Miyagawa before Gotou could.

'Yes, that’s right. They’re all from new-borns. There are roughly four or five,’ replied Matsumura, wiping the sweat off his forehead.

Though Gotou hadn’t known about it, he felt mortified for joking about treasure so frivolously.

Burying the corpses of new-born babies in a place like this – it made him doubt the nerves of the person who did it.

'Was this hole here before?’ said Miyagawa, kneeling on one knee and peering inside.

'No, we noticed that the colour of the dirt was different here and tried digging it up… Honestly, it’s awful.’

Matsumura gritted his back teeth together. Gotou felt the same way.

Miyagawa stood up and wiped the dirt off his knee. He looked up at the night sky.

'The forecast doesn’t look good.’

Gotou looked up as well.

He couldn’t see stars. The forecast never looked good in the city sky –

3

The next morning, Akemi was an hour late when she arrived at the temple.

It had taken longer than expected to find somebody to watch over her daughter. She ran around looking, but in the end, she hadn’t been able to find anybody and had brought her along.

Her daughter was currently sleeping in the baby sling on her chest.

However, she would always start crying madly when she saw somebody she didn’t know. Her daughter, Nao, had an abnormal fear of strangers.

Isshin and Yak.u.mo would be troubled about how to treat Nao too, now that she’d brought her along so suddenly.

Akemi had thought about cancelling, but she had already contacted Sachiko’s family, and she also didn’t want to crush Yak.u.mo’s thoughts just as he’d started to move.

There wasn’t any point thinking about it any more. She would talk with Isshin about what to do.

With renewed determination, Akemi went through the temple premises and pressed the intercom b.u.t.ton by the priests’ quarters.

After a while, the sliding door opened, and Isshin, in his work robes, greeted her with his usual smile.

'Welcome.’

'Ah, sorry, I couldn’t find anybody to look after my daughter…’

Akemi said that first off.

'So this is your daughter, Akemi-chan?’

She had thought that Isshin would be a bit surprised, but he just smiled like usual at Nao and patted her head.

In response, Nao opened her eyes.

Isshin’s and Nao’s eyes met.

Akemi thought that Nao would start crying, but her response was unexpected.

Nao reached a hand out towards Isshin and kicked her feet, laughing happily.

This was the first time she hadn’t cried in front of somebody she’d just met.

'What’s her name?’ said Isshin, taking Nao’s hand.

'Ah, her name’s Nao.’

Akemi was taken aback, but she gave her daughter’s name.

'It’s nice to meet you, Nao-chan.’

Isshin looked at Nao’s face.

Nao seemed even happier.

'Would you let me hold her?’

Isshin took Nao before Akemi responded, picking her up skilfully and rocking her in his arms.

Nao’s face would always stiffen just from approaching others, but Isshin, who’d she just met, was holding her. Isshin was also looked so loving that it could make someone suspect that he was her actual father.

– If only this person were Nao’s father.

That wish which wouldn’t be granted suddenly came to Akemi.

'What is it?’

While she was lost in her own thoughts, Isshin looked at her, which made her feel so embarra.s.sed even her ears went red.

'Ah, Nao’s actually really shy. It’s the first time she hasn’t cried when meeting someone new…’

Isshin nodded upon hearing Akemi’s explanation.

'That’s because you’re wary of other people, Akemi-chan.’

Akemi was startled, like she had been suddenly pushed on the back.

'I’m wary?’

'You are.’

Isshin said that with narrowed eyes as he poked Nao’s cheek.

Nao’s face scrunched up like it had tickled. When Akemi saw that, she understood what Isshin meant.

If the parent were wary, the child would feel that wariness too. That was probably it.

That made a lot of sense. Akemi hadn’t been able to open her heart up to anyone since that event.

She was afraid that they would pry into the incident, so she was wary and looked away from everyone else.

Nao wasn’t crying because Akemi wasn’t wary of Isshin –

'It’s cold out. Well, please come in.’

After Isshin urged her to do so, he went inside with Nao in his arms.

Akemi followed him.

When she entered the living room, Yak.u.mo was already waiting there.

He wore jeans and a white shirt. He was sitting with his legs out and looking up at the ceiling in boredom.

When he noticed Akemi there, he let out a purposefully large yawn.

'Yak.u.mo, this is Nao-chan.’

Isshin sat in front of Yak.u.mo, still holding Nao.

Yak.u.mo didn’t look that surprised either and just looked at Nao.

Nao reached out and grabbed Yak.u.mo’s hair.

Akemi thought that Yak.u.mo would be angry, but he didn’t look displeased and just let her continue.

'Is this your kid, Sensei?’ asked Yak.u.mo in a drawl.

It was the first time Akemi had ever been asked a question by Yak.u.mo.

'Yes, she is.’

'Hm,’ said Yak.u.mo, sounding uninterested as he stared at Nao’s face and poked her cheek.

Nao waved her arms and legs happily.

It felt rather strange. It made sense with Isshin, but Nao wasn’t wary of Yak.u.mo either.

Even though they were complete strangers, it was even possible to think of the people in this living room as family.

For just a moment, Yak.u.mo’s expression seemed to soften.

A gentle and warm expression he had never shown anyone at school –

– Yak.u.mo really is shutting away his emotions.

Akemi felt that anew.

'This kid…’

Yak.u.mo’s brow suddenly furrowed as he clapped his hands near Nao’s ear.

Nao didn’t respond and just laughed.

'Is there something wrong with her ears?’

Akemi nodded in response.

Nao couldn’t hear. It was discovered when she was a child.

When Akemi thought about Nao’s future, it sometimes made it hard for her to breathe. Nao had been given a difficult life from birth.

It was n.o.body’s fault. Everyone said that, but Akemi couldn’t help but blame herself.

– It must be my fault that Nao is like this.

Akemi tried to put away the chain of bad thoughts in her head and put a smile on her face.

However, Akemi was the only one forcing a smile.

Now that Yak.u.mo knew the facts, he seemed satisfied, and he was playing with Nao.

Isshin was doing the same.

– She can’t hear. So what?

It was like Isshin and Yak.u.mo were saying that. Worrying about her daughter’s handicap might already have been discrimination.

Akemi felt like she had been taught something very important.

'We can’t keep playing. We have to go soon,’ said Isshin, looking at the clock.

'Let’s put an end to this,’ agreed Yak.u.mo, standing up.

They had almost forgotten their goal.

They had gathered to go with Yak.u.mo to Sachiko’s house. However, there was a reason Akemi couldn’t agree immediately.

– What should I do about Nao?

She couldn’t bring her to Sachiko’s.

'I’ll watch over Nao-chan until you come back,’ offered Isshin, who seemed to have sensed what Akemi was thinking.

'Eh, but…’

Since Nao was so friendly with him, it wasn’t something she didn’t want to ask, but he would have to do more than just rock her.

There were many things to do – change her diapers, feed her milk.

'It’s fine. The families of the temple have left their children with me before. And I’ve changed Yak.u.mo’s diapers too,’ said Isshin, reading Akemi’s thoughts.

It was true that it wouldn’t be a problem leaving Nao with Isshin if he had experience, but Akemi still felt bad about it.

'He wants to, so just let him,’ said Yak.u.mo, running a hand through his hair to push Akemi to a decision.

His words weren’t pointed like they usually were.

'It’s just as Yak.u.mo says. Please hurry up and go,’ urged Isshin.

Yak.u.mo ignored Akemi, who was still undecided, and left the room briskly.

'I’m truly sorry. I’ll leave her in your care.’

Akemi gave the bag with diapers and milk to Isshin and gave a simple explanation before following Yak.u.mo out the room.

4

The day after the fire, Gotou and Miyagawa were walking in the bas.e.m.e.nt corridor of a hospital.

There was clearly insufficient lighting. It wasn’t just dim – the ventilation was bad as well, so the corridor was filled with humid air.

When compared with the clean gla.s.s entrance, it was like it wasn’t even the same building.

In the end, they found a total of seven corpses in the yard –

All of them were new-born children.

It would probably be hard work to find the mothers of those children who looked like they could even have been put in the birth registry.

Now that the evidence had been burnt in the fire, they would have to catch the missing Shimomura and ask him. That was the most certain method.

Normally, Gotou would want to join the search for the suspect Shimomura, but because of Miyagawa’s arrangement, he was going to the coroner’s to hear about the autopsy.

They went straight down the corridor. Miyagawa stopped at the door in the very back.

Miyagawa had had a long face ever since it was decided that they’d go meet the coroner.

Gotou was suddenly curious about what sort of person could make Miyagawa this gloomy.

'Miyagawa-san, what sort of person is the coroner?’

'He’s called Hata – an old man who’s so old he looks like he could die at any moment. Well, to put it in one word, he’s a pervert.’

'Pervert?’

– Did the old man wear a nurse uniform or something?

Imagining it was enough to make Gotou want to laugh.

'Anyway, no matter what the old man says, just ignore it. You won’t be able to keep up otherwise.’

After hearing Miyagawa’s warning, it was even harder for Gotou to imagine what sort of person the coroner was.

Gotou wanted to ask another question, but before he could, Miyagawa knocked on the door.

'It’s Chief Miyagawa.’

'It’s open.’

Gotou heard a hoa.r.s.e voice from the other side of the door.

Miyagawa opened the door and went inside. Gotou followed him.

It was a small rectangular room of about six tatami in size. Probably because of the lack of windows, it was so dim that it looked like something might pop out if this were a horror movie.

There was a desk at the very back of the room, surrounded by cabinets.

In front of the desk that was covered in doc.u.ments, there was an old man lazily sipping tea in a white gown.

With white hair, the old man was just skin and bones and looked like he could die at any moment.

'You again?’

Hata scratched his forehead like he was annoyed.

'Like I’d come here because I wanted to.’

Hata giggled at Miyagawa’s words, his shoulders shaking as if he was having convulsions.

He was somewhat creepy.

'Who’s the blockhead behind you?’ said Hata, pointing at Gotou with his chin.

Calling somebody he’d just met a blockhead was quite something.

'He’s Gotou, my subordinate. He’ll probably be around every once in a while.’

'My name is Gotou. It’s nice to meet you.’

Gotou bowed at Hata after Miyagawa introduced him.

However, Hata just rolled his head around like he was bored.

– This old man. I’m bowing my head to him. Maybe I’ll pull his head off.

Gotou swallowed his rising anger.

'Well, just sit over there.’

Though Hata said that, there were no chairs in the room.

– Is he making fun of us?

In contrast to Gotou’s confusion, Miyagawa’s expression didn’t change at all as he went to a nearby cabinet.

From that att.i.tude, Hata was probably always like this.

– No matter what the old man says, just ignore it.

Gotou felt like he slightly understood what Miyagawa had meant.

Unable to do anything else, Gotou crossed his arms and leant against the wall by the door.

'I came because of the corpses from the maternity clinic.’

Miyagawa brought up the topic at hand.

At that moment, Hata’s wrinkled face lit up, like he was a child who had found his toy.

'Ah, that was a big catch.’

Hatch laughed happily.

– Big catch? Oi, oi. Those weren’t words to use about children’s corpses.

Gotou’s dislike for Hata grew.

'So what did you find out?’

Miyagawa looked at Gotou, as if to tell him to keep quiet, and continued talking.

'It was just yesterday. I don’t know anything yet.’

'Don’t say that. With your skill, old man, you must know something from experience.’

It was rare for Miyagawa to b.u.t.ter someone up.

Perhaps Hata was pleased, as his expression slackened slowly as he opened his mouth.

'Well, they were skeletons. I don’t know anything for certain, but from what I’ve seen, there weren’t any obvious injuries. If they were killed, drugs or something were probably used.’

'Is it possible that they were strangled?’

Gotou said the question that came up in his head.

Then, Hata looked at Gotou scornfully.

'If an adult strangled the neck of a new-born child, their bones would break.’

Hata mimicked strangling a neck.

It was true. Gotou realised how foolish his question was, but at the same time, he was irritated.

He could’ve put that another way –

'How about the time of death?’

Miyagawa continued regardless.

'At this stage, I don’t have detailed results, but from what I see, it’s all over the place. There are things from a month or so ago, and there are some that might be from more than ten years ago.’

If what Hata said was correct, then that place had been abandoning children’s corpses there for over ten years.

– Treating people’s lives like things.

Gotou felt hatred and anger in the bottom of his stomach that almost made him shake.

'Found out anything else?’ asked Miyagawa.

Hata shook his head.

It looked like it’d take some more time before they found anything else.

'Ah, that’s right. There was one odd thing.’

Hata scratched his back as he called out to Gotou and Miyagawa, who were about to leave.

'An odd thing?’

Gotou’s brow furrowed.

'The number doesn’t match.’

'The number doesn’t match?’

Gotou didn’t understand just from that.

Perhaps he’d sensed what Gotou was thinking, as Hata spread out the doc.u.ments in front of him on the desk.

There were several photos of the discovered children’s corpses.

Even though Gotou should have been used to this, the spectacle was more awful than he’d imagined, making Gotou want to look away.

Hata took a photo out and tapped it with his finger.

In the photo, there was something like a small white rod.

It was probably an arm or a leg.

'There’s one arm too many.’

So they hadn’t found the other bones?

No, that probably wasn’t it.

They had dug up everything around there. There probably wasn’t anything left. It would have made sense if they were missing one, but having too many –

'That is odd. Probably wouldn’t have just cut off the arm and buried it there,’ murmured Miyagawa, rubbing his chin with his palm.

Hata finished drinking his tea and let out a long breath.

'But if they were going to kill them anyway, I wish they’d done it after they’d grown up a bit. Autopsying this isn’t any fun at all.’

'Oi! Old man! What did you just say!?’

Gotou spoke before thinking.

Even after hearing Gotou’s angry yell, Hata was nonchalant.

'Exactly what I said. I like fresh adult corpses.’

Now, Gotou understood what Miyagawa had said at first.

– This pervert! Of all the things to say!

Gotou lifted his hand to grab Hata, but Miyagawa pinned him down.

'Please don’t stop me! I’ll feel bad unless I punch this old man!’

'Cool your head!’ yelled Miyagawa, pushing Gotou against the wall.

Gotou hit his chest and started coughing violently.

'I said this earlier. Don’t listen to what the old man has to say!’

'But…’

'Shut up!’

Miyagawa’s fist came down on Gotou’s head. The pain made his anger lessen slightly.

Even with all the clamour in front of him, Hata looked calm. That wasn’t all – he was giggling demonically.

– I really can’t forgive him.

Gotou struggled, but then Miyagawa’s hammer of a fist came down on Gotou’s head again.

5

Akemi stood in front of Sachiko’s house with Yak.u.mo.

Yak.u.mo had not said anything as they came here.

Akemi had talked about general topics, but like an athlete gathering concentration before a match, Yak.u.mo hadn’t responded.

He might have been unexpectedly nervous.

'Are you prepared?’

Akemi asked Yak.u.mo before pressing the intercom b.u.t.ton.

'There’s nothing to prepare. I just need to look,’ said Yak.u.mo with a blank expression.

Akemi had felt like she’d shortened the distance between her and Yak.u.mo a bit when at his house, but it seemed she had been mistaken, as if it were a mirage.

She felt disappointed, but she told herself that it wasn’t that easy to connect to somebody and pressed the intercom b.u.t.ton.

After a while, Tomoko opened the door.

They had talked on the phone last night, so she invited Akemi and Yak.u.mo in without any explanation.

Of course, Akemi wouldn’t have been able to tell the truth even if asked to explain.

Your daughter appears to be possessed by a ghost, so I will be bringing a cla.s.smate who can see ghosts. If she said that, she would be treated like she were insane.

She had just said that she was coming with a cla.s.smate who wanted to visit Sachiko when she was sick.

Tomoko led them to Sachiko’s room on the second floor.

'Sachiko, your teacher’s here,’ said Tomoko, knocking on the door.

However, there was no response.

'Sacchan, it’s Takagishi. We’re here to visit. Could we come in?’

Akemi tried calling out instead.

'Don’t come in!’

Akemi heard Sachiko’s refusal through the door.

Akemi had been prepared for this, so she wasn’t that shocked.

'Sacchan, Yak.u.mo-kun came today too. He’s worried.’

Akemi continued speaking.

Yak.u.mo’s cheek twitched, like he didn’t like being used as an excuse.

'No way…’

After a while, Akemi heard Sachiko’s faint voice through the door.

The cla.s.smate she liked had suddenly come to visit her. Sachiko was probably shaken, feeling happy and confused.

'It’s true. That’s why I want you to open the door.’

Akemi tried pushing further, but Sachiko didn’t respond.

Even though she’d brought Yak.u.mo, nothing would start if the door wasn’t opened.

Akemi was thinking of what to say next when Yak.u.mo walked forward and tried the doork.n.o.b.

However, the door was locked and wouldn’t open. That had been a rather forceful approach.

'It’s me. Saitou. You’re possessed by a ghost,’ said Yak.u.mo, knocking on the door as he did so.

Tomoko was surprised by Yak.u.mo’s words and actions – her eyes went wide and she covered her mouth with her hands.

Tomoko didn’t believe her daughter when she said that there was a ghost. It would be stranger for her not to be shaken by the att.i.tude of this cla.s.smate who was supposed to have come to visit.

'Sensei, this child is Sachiko’s cla.s.smate, right?’

Tomoko looked at her suspiciously.

'Ah, yes. That’s true, but… er…’

Akemi tried to smooth things over, but she couldn’t think of an excuse and was fumbling.

'Hurry up and open the door. If you leave things like this, you won’t be able to turn back. People possessed by the spirits of the dead will die.’

Yak.u.mo ignored Akemi’s turmoil and continued to speak to Sachiko through the door.

'Die… What are you saying?’

Tomoko grabbed Yak.u.mo’s shoulder, unable to hold back.

'If I don’t say something like this, she won’t open, right?’

Yak.u.mo looked at Tomoko with a blank expression.

Though he wasn’t glaring, there was a light in his eyes that pressured his opponents.

Tomoko nervously shut her mouth.

A suffocating silence continued.

Akemi wasn’t sure what to do when she heard the sound of the door unlocking.

'See? It’s open,’ said Yak.u.mo with satisfaction, shaking off Tomoko’s hand and opening the door to step inside.

Akemi was about to follow Yak.u.mo in when Tomoko grabbed her arm.

'Excuse me, Sensei…’

Tomoko still didn’t seem to accept what had happened as she looked at Akemi for an explanation.

'It’s fine. That was a means to get Sachiko-san to open the door. Please stay outside, ma'am.’

Akemi gave her a lie for appearances and left Tomoko behind, though Tomoko still looked dubious. Akemi went inside and shut the door behind her.

She sighed –

Sachiko’s room was clean, as she had expected.

Even though she wasn’t going to school, she was probably studying properly. There were textbooks and notebooks spread open on the desk. There were reference books on the bookcase beside it.

The room seemed to symbolise a middle school student on the brink of entrance exams.

By the window, there was a full-length mirror that had been turned around and a bed, on which Sachiko, in pyjamas, was sitting while hugging her knees.

The teddy bear by her pillow looked at them.

Yak.u.mo stood in the middle of the room, put his index finger to his brow and looked at Sachiko.

'Yak.u.mo-kun. What is it?’

'You’re noisy. Be quiet for a bit,’ said Yak.u.mo, unmoving.

An electrifying tension –

Perhaps Yak.u.mo was concentrating in his own way to see the spirits of the dead.

Akemi looked at Sachiko, sitting on the bed.

Her hair was brushed neatly as usual, but her eyes were bloodshot and there were dark circles underneath them.

Her face was pale, and even her lips appeared to have faded in colour.

'Sacchan, are you OK?’

’… I’m scared… n.o.body’ll believe me… I don’t know what to do…’

Sachiko’s voice trembled.

Akemi could tell clearly that she was suffering. Even though she said there was a ghost, of course the doctors and her parents didn’t believe her.

For a girl in p.u.b.erty, being believed by n.o.body must have hurt more than being possessed by a ghost.

Akemi went close to Sachiko to hug her, to try to make her feel even slightly better.

“Don’t touch her!’ Yak.u.mo yelled, his expression changing completely.

Surprised by Yak.u.mo, who wasn’t acting normal, Akemi stopped without thinking.

– Why can’t I touch Sachiko?

She looked at Yak.u.mo for a response, but Yak.u.mo just stood there while looking at Sachiko.

'Yak.u.mo-kun. I…’

'Who is the child you’re holding at your chest?’ said Yak.u.mo, interrupting Sachiko.

At the same time, Sachiko’s shoulders jolted.

– Child?

Akemi couldn’t see anything.

However, did Yak.u.mo see something there?

Akemi had thought it would be necessary to perform rites or chant spells to see the spirits of the dead.

However, from Yak.u.mo’s att.i.tude now, he could probably see ghosts every day, even if he didn’t want to.

If that were the case, Yak.u.mo had lived his life seeing a world that Akemi and others like her could never imagine.

'I’ll ask once more. Who is that child?’

Yak.u.mo pointed at Sachiko’s child.

'I don’t know either.’

Sachiko covered her face with her hands and shook her head, flinging her hair about.

'Has that child been there since the test of courage?’

'I don’t know. Yak.u.mo-kun, what should I do!?’

Sachiko was in hysterics. It looked like her emotions were tipping open.

'Has the child been there since the test of courage?’

Yak.u.mo repeated his question with no care for Sachiko’s emotional state.

'I think that’s probably it,’ replied Sachiko in a quiet voice.

'So that really is it,’ murmured Yak.u.mo. He walked up to Sachiko and looked at her with a piercing gaze.

Under that pressure, Sachiko leant back.

There was a freezing silence –

Akemi forgot to breathe as she watched.

After a while, Yak.u.mo suddenly turned around and looked at Akemi, seeming surprised.

'You…?’

Yak.u.mo spoke in a lowered tone.

– What happened?

Ignoring Akemi, who didn’t understand the situation, Yak.u.mo pressed a hand against his left eye and collapsed to his knees.

His body shook, like he was in pain.

'Are you OK?’

Yak.u.mo didn’t respond to Akemi’s question.

Beads of sweat formed on his forehead, and his shoulders heaved as he breathed.

'Hey, Yak.u.mo-kun.’

Akemi was about to try to help him get up, but Yak.u.mo stood up himself as if to avoid that.

He was swaying, as if he were dizzy.

'What’s wrong?’

Akemi put a hand on Yak.u.mo’s shoulder.

'Let go!’

Yak.u.mo brushed Akemi’s hand aside and glared at her fiercely.

There was a violent wrath in that gaze.

For a while, Yak.u.mo glared at Akemi, but then he left the room silently.

'Sacchan, wait a bit.’

Akemi left Sachiko’s room and went after Yak.u.mo.

When she reached the corridor, Tomoko came out, asking, 'What happened?’

'I will be right back.’

Akemi waved Tomoko off and ran out the entrance.

She found Yak.u.mo immediately.

He was leaning against a telephone pole with his left hand on his face as he looked down. His breathing was ragged, as if he had run at full speed.

'Yak.u.mo-kun, are you all right?’

When she touched Yak.u.mo, he leapt away with the agility of a cat and put distance between himself and Akemi.

'Stay away.’

Yak.u.mo glared down at her, pointing his index finger at her as a warning.

Why was Yak.u.mo so guarded? And what had he seen?’

'Did you know?’ said Yak.u.mo, his breathing unsteady.

Akemi didn’t understand the question, so all she could do was keep quiet.

While neither of them spoke, the silence continued, to the point that the sound of the wind was hurting her ears –

The strength suddenly left Yak.u.mo’s shoulders, and he turned his back towards Akemi.

However, that didn’t mean the dismissive air around Yak.u.mo had disappeared.

'It’s fine. You go back first. And don’t go near that woman again.’

After saying that quickly, Yak.u.mo walked away with a shaky gait.

'Where are you going?’

There were many things that she wanted to ask, but Yak.u.mo didn’t stop or turn around.

– It might not have been a good decision to bring Yak.u.mo.

Regret gradually grew within Akemi.

6

Left behind by Yak.u.mo, Akemi returned to Sachiko’s house, apologised for what had happened earlier, and then went back to the priests’ quarters where Isshin and Nao were waiting.

'It isn’t your fault, Akemi-chan.’

After Akemi explained, Isshin said that with a shake of his head.

Wasn’t Yak.u.mo supposed to use this spiritual incident to break his own sh.e.l.l? That was what Isshin had thought, so this must have been below his expectations.

Though he didn’t say it, he must have been disappointed.

'If it’s all right, would you let me wait until Yak.u.mo-kun returns?’ asked Akemi, even though she thought herself it was an impudent request.

Yak.u.mo’s att.i.tude had changed suddenly after going to Sachiko’s room.

He might have seen something unbelievable. She wanted to know what on earth it was.

Also, she did want to be with Isshin a little longer.

'It’s a humble place, but please feel comfortable. I want to play with Nao-chan a little longer too.’

Isshin was holding Nao and looking at her face as she said that.

Nao happily stuck her finger in Isshin’s nose.

– What is she doing?

'Um, I – ’

Akemi hurriedly tried to take Nao, but Isshin stopped her.

That wasn’t all – even Nao shook her head.

'Being with you almost makes me forget that I’m a teacher, Isshin-san.’

It was a bit strange now that she thought about it. The teacher had gone to her student’s home and was letting her student’s guardian hold her own child.

'From how I see it, Akemi-chan, while being Yak.u.mo’s teacher, you’re also my cute student. You don’t have to worry about those details now, do you?’

Though Isshin’s words were rather strong, they were also convincing to her.

He really was a mysterious person.

'If you’re sure it’s all right.’

'Then I’ll pour some tea.’

After saying that, Isshin stood up, Nao still in his arms.

'No, I’ll do it.’

Akemi stood up as well.

'No, it’s fine. Please sit then.’

'Then I’ll take Nao.’

'That’s fine too.’

Isshin’s only fault might have been that he wanted to do things himself.

However, that also made him look cute.

'Please choose one of those options.’

Akemi put her hands on her waist and pretended to be angry as she approached Isshin.

Isshin looked troubled, but finally he chose Nao and sat back down.

Akemi went to the kitchen and looked around.

It was kept well, but there were oppressively few seasonings. When she opened the fridge, as expected, there was virtually nothing that could be called an ingredient.

'Isshin-san, what do you normally eat?’

'Well, we’re just two men. We eat frozen food and side dishes purchased from the supermarket – a variety.’

That wasn’t a variety.

However, perhaps it couldn’t be helped. Isshin was doing his work as a priest and acting as Yak.u.mo’s parent on his own.

It would be difficult to provide meals on top of that.

Akemi found it very difficult to cook herself while also working.

– All right, I’ve decided.

'Sorry, please watch Nao for a while.’

Akemi returned to the living room to declare that to Isshin as she picked up her bag.

'Where are you going?’

Isshin looked confused as he looked up at Akemi.

'To buy dinner.’

Isshin looked surprised by Akemi’s response.

Even Isshin had taken time to understand what she meant.

'No, that’s too much. Er…’

Isshin stood up and was fumbling for words.

He was probably trying to refuse, but he didn’t know how to do it.

'Please leave it to me.’

Akemi said just that and left the living room before he could stop her.

It was strange. Even though she was old enough to know better, when she looked at Yak.u.mo, she had been so caught that she wouldn’t lose to Sachiko.

There must be something wrong with me –

7

Yak.u.mo stood in the school’s backyard.

The cherry blossom tree, the start of the incident –

Because it was a Sat.u.r.day, he had thought that n.o.body would be at school, but the basketball club was in the gym, and practising. Their yells and the sound of the b.a.l.l.s echoed.

Yak.u.mo knelt with a deep sigh.

At the root of the cherry blossom tree, there was a long rock sticking out, just like a gravestone.

Though it’d be hard to tell at first glance, this area only had different coloured soil.

Yak.u.mo had understood the gist of what was happening to Sachiko when she went to her room.

He also knew how to solve the spiritual phenomenon.

However, he didn’t feel like actually doing it.

Yak.u.mo stood up and lightly touched the tree trunk.

'Were you unwanted too?’

There was no response.

There was a suffocating feeling in his chest.

Why did he have to suffer like this?

If he didn’t know anything, he wouldn’t be troubled like this.

'I…’

'What are you doing, you b.a.s.t.a.r.d!?’

Yak.u.mo heard a voice, interrupting his murmur.

When he turned around, he saw Tsukasa there in a jersey.

Like they were obeying Tsukasa, there was a posse of students, with Youhei at the start.

'I’m asking you. Answer.’

Tsukasa spoke quickly as he approached Yak.u.mo.

– These guys might be nice enough to destroy me.

That ruinous thought suddenly came to Yak.u.mo’s head.

'It’s got nothing to do with you,’ said Yak.u.mo challengingly as he tried to leave.

'Wait!’

Tsukasa glared at Yak.u.mo with animosity as he blocked Yak.u.mo’s way.

Yak.u.mo stopped and looked back at Tsukasa.

'You’re in my way.’

'What? If you get too ahead of yourself, I’ll beat you up!’

Tsukasa glared at Yak.u.mo and brought their foreheads close together.

– Oh, so he’ll kill me.

'Do it,’ said Yak.u.mo expressionlessly.

'What?’

'You’re going to kill me, right?’

'You…’

Tsukasa took a step back, as if afraid.

'Kill me. That’s what you want, right? Or are you scared?’

'You brat…’

'It looks like your leader is too afraid to put a hand on me.’

Yak.u.mo spoke to the posse behind Tsukasa.

Tsukasa’s expression twisted into humiliation.

'Get him!’ said Youhei.

'Yeah, get him!’

The other posse members spoke up too.

'Show your stuff.’

When Yak.u.mo said that, Tsukasa’s right fist came flying.

Yak.u.mo took that surprise hit and lost his balance.

Then, he underwent a shower of kicks.

As he fell to the ground, the other students joined in, and he was showered with blows.

– Now I don’t have to suffer any more.

In that intense pain, Yak.u.mo felt bliss at being released.

8

After Gotou left the perverted coroner’s hospital, he went straight to the investigation on the informant with Miyagawa.

Though it was called an investigation, it was just boring work, questioning people around the telephone booth.

For Gotou, who wasn’t good at using his head, this work was more suitable for him.

However, he hadn’t found any useful information. There wasn’t anything to do about it. The telephone booth was under a pedestrian bridge and at a dead end.

Furthermore, numerous people used telephone booths.

It wouldn’t be that easy to get eyewitness testimony.

It would be different if they at least had the date and time, but even that was vague.

If the informant had figured out that much, they would have to be quite keen.

Gotou recalled the man he’d seen on the walkway.

An unsettling man in all black. He had to be the informer. Gotou was near certain.

'Gotou, let’s take a break.’

Without waiting for Gotou’s reply, Miyagawa leant against the fence dividing the school and the road and lit a cigarette.

'Miyagawa-san, you’re getting on in years if you’re going to throw in the towel here.’

Gotou threw a little bite into his usual comeback.

Gotou thought that Miyagawa would get angry, but Miyagawa just let it slide with a snort.

'Don’t chat – get me something warm to drink.’

Miyagawa threw a five hundred yen coin at Gotou.

'Would coffee be all right?’

'Black!’ yelled Miyagawa with a wave.

– There should be a vending machine around here.

Gotou turned right at the road along the fence and went to the back of the school.

Just as he’d remembered, there was a vending machine there.

Gotou jogged up to the vending machine and put money in. He couldn’t find the black coffee Miyagawa wanted.

It’d be a pain looking for another vending machine –

'Tea will be fine, right?’

Gotou was pressing the vending machine b.u.t.ton when he suddenly heard a voice.

'Die! Take that!’

There were jeers unsuitable for an area near a middle school.

Gotou looked around and spotted four or five middle school students standing in a circle underneath the dead cherry blossom tree behind the fence.

There was a boy of the same age on the ground inside that circle.

Gotou ran before thinking.

'Oi, you brats! What are you doing!?’

He climbed onto the fence and yelled from the bottom of his stomach.

The boys scattered in all directions at this sudden intruder, leaving the boy collapsed on the ground by himself.

'Oi. You all right?’

Gotou jumped off the fence and went up to the boy.

He tried to give him a hand, but the boy stood up on his own as if to say it wasn’t necessary while pressing a hand against his left eye.

However, it looked like the injuries were severe. He was staggering like a fawn.

'Oi. Don’t overdo it.’

Gotou forced the boy to sit on the ground and looked at his face to check his injuries.

The boy opened his eyes.

'You! You’re the kid from that time!’ exclaimed Gotou in surprise.

This was the boy he met at the park when he was chasing the man that he thought was the informant.

'You’re speaking too loudly right next to my ear,’ said the boy, spitting out a glob of b.l.o.o.d.y saliva.

– He’s d.a.m.n impertinent for his awful state.

'Do you know those guys?’

'I know them, but I don’t plan on telling you who they are.’

The boy tried to stand up using the tree trunk without even wiping the dirt off his clothes.

Gotou quickly grabbed the boy’s arm.

Gotou had a lot of other things he wanted to ask this kid.

'Let go of me!’

'Nope, not going to. I’ve got a lot of questions for you.’

'I don’t have anything to say.’

'Shut it. Don’t act clever – you’re just a brat who can’t do anything without his parents!’

Gotou had planned on saying that to get him to submit.

However, Gotou was the one who became lost for words.

The boy slowly took the hand off his left eye. His glowing red eye woke Gotou’s sleeping memories.

– I’ve seen this red eye before.

It was a rainy night nearly ten years ago –

At the time, Gotou had been working as an officer at a police box, and a man showed up then.

– A child is about to be murdered.

The man had said that.

Gotou did as the man instructed and went to a building under construction.

He saved a kid who was about to be strangled to death by a woman there.

That kid had had a red left eye, like the boy in front of him.

He found out later that the woman who tried to kill the boy was his mother.

– What sort of life will this kid live after his mother’s tried to kill him?

Gotou recalled thinking that at the time.

And now, he had the answer in front of his eyes.

He was in a rage. His eyes seemed to reject everything in the world.

Did this boy have hatred or despair in his heart –

'Your name was Yak.u.mo, right?’

Gotou said the name left in the corner of his head.

'You’ve just remembered?’ said Yak.u.mo, glaring at Gotou.

– What kind of tone is that, you brat?

Gotou forced himself not to lift his raised fist.

'Ah, that’s right. I should’ve noticed the other time we met, but I didn’t realise since you’d changed so much. And you were smaller then.’

Gotou put his palm parallel to the ground and placed it at his waist.

Yak.u.mo looked at him coldly.

– Cold eyes for a brat. Don’t look at me like that.

'Were the guys who beat you up earlier cla.s.smates?’

Gotou felt uncomfortable and brought the conversation back on track.

However, Yak.u.mo didn’t reply. Even though it was regarding himself, he seemed uninterested.

'Tell me their names. That was clearly a.s.sault.’

Gotou touched Yak.u.mo’s shoulder, but he leapt away that instant.

'Don’t meddle in worthless things,’ said Yak.u.mo, voice clearly hostile.

'It’s not worthless. I’m thinking of you when I say that.’

'That’s what’s called worthless. You’ll just help here and then act like you’ve got nothing to do with it later, right? Then you shouldn’t get involved in the first place.’

– This brat. If I keep quiet and listen, he just says whatever the h.e.l.l he wants.

Gotou’s reasoning short-circuited.

'Enough already! You think you’re the only guy who’s got it tough, don’t you?’

'What do you want to say?’

'You’re not the only guy who has it tough! People live while helping others! If I didn’t save you then, you’d be dead!’

Gotou grabbed Yak.u.mo’s collar and threatened him.

’… Who…’

Yak.u.mo looked away from Gotou and spoke quietly.

'If you’ve got something to say, say it clearly!’

Yak.u.mo’s red eye looked at Gotou again when he yelled.

A chill ran down Gotou’s spine.

'Who asked you to save me?’

'What?’

Gotou didn’t understand what Yak.u.mo meant.

'Who asked you to save me!? I should’ve just died then! I’m suffering because I’m alive! Why did my mother try to kill me? Am I unwanted? Why was I born? Can you give me those answers?’

Yak.u.mo’s face was red – he was so formidable it made Gotou think he might grow horns and fangs.

Under that pressure, Gotou couldn’t even think calmly about the meaning of the questions.

'You saved me even though you can’t give me those answers? Why!?’ shouted Yak.u.mo.

What the h.e.l.l is he saying? I just saved the life that looked like it was going to disappear from in front of me. I wasn’t thinking about anything after that.

With anger and confusion, Gotou completely lost his reason.

Without realising it himself, he raised his fist and punched the side of Yak.u.mo’s face.

Yak.u.mo fell backwards.

All his force from earlier disappeared – he looked dazed, like he’d fallen for a tasteless trick.

'Shut up, you brat! Think about that yourself! If you want to die so much, I’ll kill you right here!’

In the heat of his anger, Gotou lifted his fist again.

'You idiot! What the h.e.l.l are you doing!?’

Along with that yell, a violent impact hit the back of Gotou’s head.

The ground shook – Gotou couldn’t stand and collapsed to his knees.

– Who the h.e.l.l was that?

With his head in his hands, Gotou looked up.

'Are you shaking someone down at your age?’

Miyagawa looked down on Gotou with an intimidating stance.

I can’t tell if his timing is good or bad –

'I want to hear about the situation in detail.’

Gotou looked at Yak.u.mo again.

He didn’t understand himself why he had become so serious while dealing with a kid.

Perhaps it was because he was like Gotou had been in the past.

Gotou smiled self-derisively.

9

– Yak.u.mo will probably return while I’m preparing dinner.

Though Akemi thought that, even after she went from the kitchen to the table, Yak.u.mo hadn’t returned.

She really should have followed him. Hindsight was 20/20.

'This looks delicious. Let’s eat without waiting for Yak.u.mo.’

Isshin said that in a carefree manner while picking up a piece of fried chicken and eating.

Isshin smiled broadly, as if to express how yummy it was, and tried to feed Nao in his lap too.

'Nao can’t eat that yet.’

'Oh, that’s too bad – it’s so delicious.’

Isshin shrugged his shoulders like a kid whose prank had been found out.

Akemi knew she was a worrywart, but she felt like Isshin, on the other hand, was too carefree.

'I’m going out for a bit.’

Akemi stood up just as Yak.u.mo came into the living room.

'What happened?’

Akemi spoke up without thinking upon seeing Yak.u.mo’s face.

He looked awful. There were scratches all over, and there was blood on his lips and a bruise on his cheek.

Furthermore, the contact lens in his left eye wasn’t there, so his red eye was in the open.

'Are you OK?’

Akemi tried to look at his injuries, but Yak.u.mo pushed him away.

'It’s nothing.’

'You can’t call this nothing, right?’

'Leave me alone!’ threatened Yak.u.mo, glaring at Akemi.

Akemi couldn’t say anything when he responded so emotionally to her.

'Where did you go?’

Isshin asked instead of Akemi.

'Investigating the requested case.’

It had to hurt. Yak.u.mo was holding his chin with a twisted expression as he replied.

'School?’

'Yeah.’

Yak.u.mo gave a short reply and sat down cross-legged.

'I see,’ said Isshin with a nod. He didn’t ask Yak.u.mo anything else.

Just from asking the location, it looked like he’d understood the cause of the injuries.

'What’s this?’

Yak.u.mo pointed at the food on top of the table with a suspicious expression.

'You can tell from looking, right? It’s dinner.’

Isshin smiled happily.

'That’s not what I’m asking.’

'Then what are you asking?’

With the question turned back to him, Yak.u.mo awkwardly ran a hand through his hair.

Things like that made Akemi think he really was a boy in p.u.b.erty.

'Let’s eat quickly. It’d be a waste if it gets cold.’

Isshin urged Yak.u.mo, but he just looked at the table like a wary cat.

Akemi went to the kitchen and scooped rice out into a bowl, handing it to Yak.u.mo.

Yak.u.mo probably still hadn’t understood the situation. He just stood there with the rice bowl, dazed.

'Let’s eat.’

Isshin put his hands together and started eating the rice heartily.

At first, Yak.u.mo looked at them, but perhaps his appet.i.te won out, as he began to eat silently.

Even though this was the first time they’d sat around a table like this, it felt like something that had happened hundreds of times in a daily life comic strip.

– If only that were the case.

Akemi couldn’t help but wish for that.

She had always been afraid ever since that incident –

She had felt despair after imagining herself ten years in the future. She had believed that she couldn’t have a bright future any more.

However, mightn’t it be possible for her to have a happy future like this too?

Wouldn’t a day come when she could have a daily life like this, at a table with her family?

If it were with Isshin –

Akemi felt embarra.s.sed for wishing something that couldn’t be granted, and her cheeks went red, which was unsuited for her age.

'Hey, Yak.u.mo. What did you find out about that ghost?’ said Isshin after finishing his food.

Yak.u.mo’s expression had softened slightly, but it quickly stiffened.

'I don’t want to talk about it.’

Yak.u.mo said just that and shut his mouth.

It felt like he had grasped the solution to the spiritual phenomenon, but he didn’t want to act on it.

'It’d be a transgression if you knew but didn’t do anything,’ Isshin said quietly.

'I don’t know what to do.’

Yak.u.mo’s voice was so weak it sounded like it could fade away at any moment.

'Even if you don’t understand, shouldn’t you do something now that you know?’

'Will doing that bring some benefit to me?’

Yak.u.mo stood up, as if to run from the conversation with Isshin.

'That’s not what I’m talking about.’

Even though Yak.u.mo had set out to solve the spiritual phenomenon that was occurring to Sachiko yesterday, his att.i.tude had turned 180 degrees.

Did it have something to do with his injuries?

'I did what I could. I don’t want to stick my neck in any further.’

Yak.u.mo declared that and ignored Isshin, leaving the living room.

'Honestly. He’s so stubborn.’

Isshin looked down, looking like he was smiling and crying –

10

While driving, Gotou glanced at Miyagawa in the pa.s.senger seat.

He was smoking with a grim expression.

Miyagawa’s face was already scary enough, so it was hard to tell when he was angry.

'I’m really sorry.’

Gotou apologised for the nth time.

'Don’t worry about it. It worked out fine,’ Miyagawa said clearly.

It was true that it worked out fine, but Gotou didn’t feel good about it.

After Miyagawa stopped him, Gotou was prepared for Yak.u.mo to complain.

However, Yak.u.mo had said something else.

– I’ve already forgotten it.

He had said that so readily that it was anticlimactic.

And Gotou couldn’t tell what Yak.u.mo was thinking.

His doubt had smouldered into irritation and finally something like anger.

'Gotou, do you know that brat?’ said Miyagawa, pressing his cigarette into the ashtray.

'Yes. I’d forgotten him until just then, but that brat’s mother tried to kill him when he was a kid.’

'And?’

Miyagawa urged him to continue.

'At the time, I was working at the police box and coincidentally saved him.’

'I see. So why’d his mother try to kill him?’

Miyagawa lit a new cigarette and leant back on the seat.

Gotou had that question too. The mother had been missing ever since, so Gotou didn’t know, but he had an idea.

'You saw it too, right, Miyagawa-san? That eye…’

'Yeah.’

Miyagawa closed his eyes, perhaps recalling Yak.u.mo’s red left eye.

'That eye might have something to do with it.’

'A forced double suicide from thinking of their disabled child’s painful future… Stories like that come up often.’

As Miyagawa said, Gotou often heard about stories like that.

There were often cases where guardians became neurotic and lost their ability to reason coolly. Yak.u.mo’s mother might have been in the same situation –

However, Gotou couldn’t accept it. He knew why.

'But for him, it was just a red left eye.’

His appearance was just a bit different. That was all. It wasn’t like a disability that would hinder his life.

'It’d be nice if everyone were like you.’

Miyagawa laughed.

'What do you mean?’

'People can be incredibly cold towards others that are different from them.’

'Huh…’

'That brat must have suffered countless times because of that eye.’

Perhaps it was as Miyagawa said.

– Who asked you to save me?

The words Yak.u.mo said earlier came up in Gotou’s mind.

'Should I not have saved him?’

He hadn’t meant on saying that, but the words came out of his mouth.

'What do you mean?’

Miyagawa looked bewildered, like he was reading an English-language newspaper.

Now that Gotou had said it, he had to explain.

'Earlier, he said this to me. Asked me why I saved him. Said that he’d just been suffering as he lived…’

'Meaning he wouldn’t have had to suff