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Pol. Honest, my Lord?
Ham. I sir, to be honest as this world goes, is to bee one man pick'd out of two thousand
Pol. That's very true, my Lord
Ham. For if the Sun breed Magots in a dead dogge, being a good kissing Carrion- Haue you a daughter?
Pol. I haue my Lord
Ham. Let her not walke i'thSunne: Conception is a blessing, but not as your daughter may conceiue. Friend looke too't
Pol. How say you by that? Still harping on my daughter: yet he knew me not at first; he said I was a Fishmonger: he is farre gone, farre gone: and truly in my youth, I suffred much extreamity for loue: very neere this. Ile speake to him againe. What do you read my Lord?
Ham. Words, words, words
Pol. What is the matter, my Lord?
Ham. Betweene who?
Pol. I meane the matter you meane, my Lord
Ham. Slanders Sir: for the Satyricall slaue saies here, that old men haue gray Beards; that their faces are wrinkled; their eyes purging thicke Amber, or Plum-Tree Gumme: and that they haue a plentifull locke of Wit, together with weake Hammes. All which Sir, though I most powerfully, and potently beleeue; yet I holde it not Honestie to haue it thus set downe: For you your selfe Sir, should be old as I am, if like a Crab you could go backward
Pol. Though this be madnesse, Yet there is Method in't: will you walke Out of the ayre my Lord?
Ham. Into my Graue?
Pol. Indeed that is out o'th' Ayre: How pregnant (sometimes) his Replies are?
A happinesse, That often Madnesse hits on, Which Reason and Sanitie could not So prosperously be deliuer'd of.
I will leaue him, And sodainely contriue the meanes of meeting Betweene him, and my daughter.
My Honourable Lord, I will most humbly Take my leaue of you
Ham. You cannot Sir take from me any thing, that I will more willingly part withall, except my life, my life
Polon. Fare you well my Lord
Ham. These tedious old fooles
Polon. You goe to seeke my Lord Hamlet; there hee is.
Enter Rosincran and Guildensterne.
Rosin. G.o.d saue you Sir
Guild. Mine honour'd Lord?
Rosin. My most deare Lord?
Ham. My excellent good friends? How do'st thou Guildensterne? Oh, Rosincrane; good Lads: How doe ye both?
Rosin. As the indifferent Children of the earth
Guild. Happy, in that we are not ouer-happy: on Fortunes Cap, we are not the very b.u.t.ton
Ham. Nor the Soales of her Shoo?
Rosin. Neither my Lord
Ham. Then you liue about her waste, or in the middle of her fauour?
Guil. Faith, her priuates, we
Ham. In the secret parts of Fortune? Oh, most true: she is a Strumpet. What's the newes?
Rosin. None my Lord; but that the World's growne honest
Ham. Then is Doomesday neere: But your newes is not true. Let me question more in particular: what haue you my good friends, deserued at the hands of Fortune, that she sends you to Prison hither?
Guil. Prison, my Lord?
Ham. Denmark's a Prison
Rosin. Then is the World one
Ham. A goodly one, in which there are many Confines, Wards, and Dungeons; Denmarke being one o'th'
worst
Rosin. We thinke not so my Lord
Ham. Why then 'tis none to you; for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so: to me it is a prison
Rosin. Why then your Ambition makes it one: 'tis too narrow for your minde
Ham. O G.o.d, I could be bounded in a nutsh.e.l.l, and count my selfe a King of infinite s.p.a.ce; were it not that I haue bad dreames
Guil. Which dreames indeed are Ambition: for the very substance of the Ambitious, is meerely the shadow of a Dreame
Ham. A dreame it selfe is but a shadow
Rosin. Truely, and I hold Ambition of so ayry and light a quality, that it is but a shadowes shadow
Ham. Then are our Beggers bodies; and our Monarchs and out-stretcht Heroes the Beggers Shadowes: shall wee to th' Court: for, by my fey I cannot reason?
Both. Wee'l wait vpon you
Ham. No such matter. I will not sort you with the rest of my seruants: for to speake to you like an honest man: I am most dreadfully attended; but in the beaten way of friendship, What make you at Elsonower?
Rosin. To visit you my Lord, no other occasion
Ham. Begger that I am, I am euen poore in thankes; but I thanke you: and sure deare friends my thanks are too deare a halfepeny; were you not sent for? Is it your owne inclining? Is it a free visitation? Come, deale iustly with me: come, come; nay speake
Guil. What should we say my Lord?
Ham. Why any thing. But to the purpose; you were sent for; and there is a kinde confession in your lookes; which your modesties haue not craft enough to color, I know the good King & Queene haue sent for you
Rosin. To what end my Lord?
Ham. That you must teach me: but let mee coniure you by the rights of our fellowship, by the consonancy of our youth, by the Obligation of our euer-preserued loue, and by what more deare, a better proposer could charge you withall; be euen and direct with me, whether you were sent for or no
Rosin. What say you?
Ham. Nay then I haue an eye of you: if you loue me hold not off
Guil. My Lord, we were sent for
Ham. I will tell you why; so shall my antic.i.p.ation preuent your discouery of your secricie to the King and Queene: moult no feather, I haue of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth, forgone all custome of exercise; and indeed, it goes so heauenly with my disposition; that this goodly frame the Earth, seemes to me a sterrill Promontory; this most excellent Canopy the Ayre, look you, this braue ore-hanging, this Maiesticall Roofe, fretted with golden fire: why, it appeares no other thing to mee, then a foule and pestilent congregation of vapours.
What a piece of worke is a man! how n.o.ble in Reason? how infinite in faculty? in forme and mouing how expresse and admirable? in Action, how like an Angel?
in apprehension, how like a G.o.d? the beauty of the world, the Parragon of Animals; and yet to me, what is this Quintessence of Dust? Man delights not me; no, nor Woman neither; though by your smiling you seeme to say so
Rosin. My Lord, there was no such stuffe in my thoughts